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(Daily Mail)   Graffiti artist who made $200m in Facebook IPO says he was offered oral sex every day for the rest of his life for $2m. You should really have a talk with your Mom   (dailymail.co.uk ) divider line
    More: Sad, Facebook IPO, Sean Parker, Facebook, Dustin Moskovitz, Good Morning America, David Choe  
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25854 clicks; posted to Main » on 11 Feb 2012 at 9:35 AM (4 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2012-02-11 01:50:06 AM  
The art school drop out says he hates his new found fame and fortune, as it means that 'more people will bother him'.

You made your choice, dude. Gotta live with the consequences.

Besides ... now you can pay people to keep the parasites at bay.
 
2012-02-11 02:02:08 AM  
See, here's the thing: there is oral sex, there is good oral sex, and then there's great oral sex.

Just offering 'oral sex' is not by definition (unless you're really hard up) an automatic green for this kind of thing.
 
2012-02-11 02:37:58 AM  
I love that he hates his new fame so much he goes on GMA to whine about it.
 
2012-02-11 02:58:38 AM  
I really f'n hate twerps like this one.
 
2012-02-11 04:02:15 AM  
Relevant and NSFW language. (new window)
 
2012-02-11 05:49:57 AM  
Facebook offices look like a 14 year old's bedroom.
 
2012-02-11 08:17:48 AM  

Slaxl: Facebook offices look like a 14 year old's bedroom.


I don't like it either but I'm pretty sure he doesn't give a sh*t what we think.
 
2012-02-11 08:52:36 AM  
That's not a bad deal, really.
 
2012-02-11 09:39:20 AM  
An artist liked his life better when he wasn't so mainstream.

Well color me farking shocked.
 
2012-02-11 09:39:35 AM  
Two things: One, for an ex to be so blatant about wanting money, she'd better give the best head in the world as her greed would be a massive turn-off. Impotency-inducing. Two, you know that once she's got $2M she'll be too good for you again.
 
2012-02-11 09:42:14 AM  
Three words:

Boo. Farking. Hoo.
 
2012-02-11 09:43:32 AM  
if the money makes him have sad face he can give the money away.

I hate when the rich and famous complain about being rich and famous.

You didn't choose your profession to be poor and anonymous so don't complain when your not.

nut up.
 
2012-02-11 09:45:11 AM  
So how much did this FB IPO increase the wealth inequality chart for the year?
 
2012-02-11 09:45:22 AM  
Wouldn't it be better to invest $2mln in a brothel and as the owner have oral sex daily from your choice of beauties?
 
2012-02-11 09:46:01 AM  
What I don't understand is why, if he disregarded Facebook at the time, did he accept the stock over the cash?
 
2012-02-11 09:46:18 AM  
Step one would probably be to stop giving interviews, dumbass.
 
ecl
2012-02-11 09:48:07 AM  
So his ex-girlfriend is a cheap prostitute?


365 days a year, 2 times a day, 35 years and she's giving him bj's at $7.50 a pop. I'd take advantage of that though. I'm guessing I could get her down to about $4.
 
2012-02-11 09:49:00 AM  
TFA: He said: ' I got a text from a woman I hadn't spoken to in five years and she offered me oral sex every day for the rest of my life for $2 million.'

I suppose that's better than the 100 million for almost no sex he'd likely get if he married.

TFA: The anguished artist places more value on his privacy than the money.

So he doesn't have a facebook account?
 
2012-02-11 09:49:20 AM  
I'll do it for a million. Of course, I'll kill him tomorrow.
 
2012-02-11 09:49:49 AM  
Okay, for the umpteenth time, he MIGHT make $200 million. FB hasn't gone public yet.
 
2012-02-11 09:53:51 AM  

stuhayes2010: Okay, for the umpteenth time, he MIGHT make $200 million. FB hasn't gone public yet.


Pretty much nobody seems to understand that.
 
2012-02-11 09:54:29 AM  

ecl: So his ex-girlfriend is a cheap prostitute?


365 days a year, 2 times a day, 35 years and she's giving him bj's at $7.50 a pop. I'd take advantage of that though. I'm guessing I could get her down to about $4.


And the trick there is to pay monthly or so, not all up front.
 
2012-02-11 09:56:13 AM  
Don't pay upfront.
 
2012-02-11 09:56:23 AM  

clancifer: That's not a bad deal, really.


In Europe, it would be a bad deal.

If my local newspaper is to be trusted, a blowjob costs between 30 and 40 Euros; that's 40 - 50 USD. Let's assume that the millionaire-dude lives another 70 years. 70 years of blowjobs (365 blowjobs/year) would only amount to 1,022,000 € (~ 1,345,974 USD), and that's not even taking into account that he could invest the 2 million (even taking inflation raising the price of a blowjob to 160€ in 70 years into account would let him come out ahead if he invested it).

And if he buys the blowjobs day-to-day, he could bring variety into it. His ex will age...
 
2012-02-11 09:56:31 AM  

bring to a festering boil: ee, here's the thing: there is oral sex, there is good oral sex, and then there's great oral sex.


Yeah, there is such thing as a bad Beej.

I know the first one I got it was yesterday in high school, cute goth girl a year ahead of me. But she was a huge pot head and always had a dry mouth. It was like a cat was licking it and we all know what that's like. I was turned off to oral until I finally got a decent one at a rest stop.
 
2012-02-11 09:58:41 AM  
He's 35. Lets say he lives another 50 years to 85.

50x365=18250 days.

2000000/18250=109.589.

Is 110 what a bj goes for on the market these days? From the same ex girlfriend for life? She will get older too.
 
2012-02-11 09:58:49 AM  
'I cannot buy my privacy back. Every news organisation in the world is beating down the door trying to get an interview and I'm like 'Oh my God'.

Don't worry. In a few months, no one will remember who the fark you are anyway. Enjoy your 15 minutes the fade back into obscurity.
 
2012-02-11 09:58:55 AM  
Reading that article, I realized Facebook just added a lot of humongous douche bags to the already douchey population of multi-millionaires.

the graffiti artist sounds like the only guy among them with his head on straight.

hope he finds a way to keep doing what he wants without the cash ruining his life.
 
2012-02-11 10:00:00 AM  

WeenerGord: He's 35. Lets say he lives another 50 years to 85.

50x365=18250 days.

2000000/18250=109.589.

Is 110 what a bj goes for on the market these days? From the same ex girlfriend for life? She will get older too.


I don't think she was 100% serious.
 
2012-02-11 10:01:24 AM  
I'd take her up on it, make her sign a contract and then sue her for breach of contract the first time she can't make it. You get some NSA BJs and your money back. Win win!
 
2012-02-11 10:03:44 AM  

ecl: So his ex-girlfriend is a cheap prostitute?


365 days a year, 2 times a day, 35 years and she's giving him bj's at $7.50 a pop. I'd take advantage of that though. I'm guessing I could get her down to about $4.


2 BJ's a day = $15

$15 x 365 days = $5475

$5475 x 35 years= $191,625

Close though.
 
2012-02-11 10:05:15 AM  

bring to a festering boil: See, here's the thing: there is oral sex, there is good oral sex, and then there's great oral sex.

Just offering 'oral sex' is not by definition (unless you're really hard up) an automatic green for this kind of thing.


Even the worst I ever had was wonderful
 
2012-02-11 10:08:38 AM  
He seems to forget that there are plenty of millionaires in the world. We just don't know about them because they don't do extravagant, flamboyant stuff and act like attention whores.

When you pull your Ferrari into the parking lot of the Starbucks you used to walk to from your crap job you're making a concerted effort to call attention to yourself.

Sitting at home playing video games and figuring out which island in the BVI you want to buy, build your mansion and spend the rest of your life fly-fishing the flats of doesn't call much attention to you.

...so you miss out on the Starbucks. Bummer. Go pay someone to deliver it to you.
 
2012-02-11 10:09:36 AM  

cptrios: stuhayes2010: Okay, for the umpteenth time, he MIGHT make $200 million. FB hasn't gone public yet.

Pretty much nobody seems to understand that.


To be fair, it is imminent enough and has the momentum that his slice of the pie will very likely be worth around that value at IPO time.

Will it be worth that much two weeks after the IPO? We'll see...
 
2012-02-11 10:09:55 AM  

lazymojo: Reading that article, I realized Facebook just added a lot of humongous douche bags to the already douchey population of multi-millionaires.

the graffiti artist sounds like the only guy among them with his head on straight.

hope he finds a way to keep doing what he wants without the cash ruining his life.


He could give the cash to me, then he wouldn't have to worry about it.
 
2012-02-11 10:10:26 AM  
The anguished artist places more value on his privacy than the money.
He explained: 'I cannot buy my privacy back. Every news organisation in the world is beating down the door trying to get an interview and I'm like 'Oh my God'.


I'm gonna note the irony here and move on.
 
2012-02-11 10:11:02 AM  
I recently saw his video series Thumbs up on Vice.com. He travels around different countries by hitchhiking. It was pretty interesting.
 
2012-02-11 10:12:28 AM  

Mugato: Yeah, there is such thing as a bad Beej.


I disagree.

One girl I was with had no idea what she was doing. I actually ended up with "teeth burns" from her dragging her teeth. Think of a rug burn on your junk. Ouch.

Best beej ever? This really nice Mexican girl I met online - just a FWB type thing. Her roommates were two gay guys who sat her down one day and said, "You wanna keep a man? You need to know how to give a good beej..." then proceeded to give her pointers.

I had her thank them for me the next day.

Business idea for any gay Farkers out there: Start up a consulting service and give lessons to straight people on how the proper techniques and procedures. Charge a premium for that - market it to husbands. After you get one or two satisfied clients (HA!) your business will take off, thanks to word of mouth (HA!!) advertising.

:)
 
2012-02-11 10:12:38 AM  

cptrios: stuhayes2010: Okay, for the umpteenth time, he MIGHT make $200 million. FB hasn't gone public yet.

Pretty much nobody seems to understand that.


Yeah, so he better play this shiat up, or he'll only get $2m when it does.
 
2012-02-11 10:13:35 AM  

H. W. Plainview: $5475 x 35 years= $191,625 Close though.


That's not even close to 2 mil. 200k goes into 2 mil 10 times. 191k is less than one tenth of 2 mil.

lazymojo: I don't think she was 100% serious.


How do you know that? Farkers and Farkettes, if one of your old ex's came into 200 mil overnight, would you be serious about trying to whore yourself to get a fistful of it?
 
ecl
2012-02-11 10:13:47 AM  

H. W. Plainview: ecl: So his ex-girlfriend is a cheap prostitute?


365 days a year, 2 times a day, 35 years and she's giving him bj's at $7.50 a pop. I'd take advantage of that though. I'm guessing I could get her down to about $4.

2 BJ's a day = $15

$15 x 365 days = $5475

$5475 x 35 years= $191,625

Close though.


No more crack before dawn for me.
 
2012-02-11 10:19:05 AM  

Alphager: clancifer: That's not a bad deal, really.

In Europe, it would be a bad deal.

If my local newspaper is to be trusted, a blowjob costs between 30 and 40 Euros; that's 40 - 50 USD. Let's assume that the millionaire-dude lives another 70 years. 70 years of blowjobs (365 blowjobs/year) would only amount to 1,022,000 € (~ 1,345,974 USD), and that's not even taking into account that he could invest the 2 million (even taking inflation raising the price of a blowjob to 160€ in 70 years into account would let him come out ahead if he invested it).

And if he buys the blowjobs day-to-day, he could bring variety into it. His ex will age...


After he reaches a certain age I doubt he'll get very much out of blowjobs, especially if it's the same woman who was giving them to him every day for several decades.
 
2012-02-11 10:19:17 AM  

Skarekrough: ...so you miss out on the Starbucks. Bummer. Go pay someone to deliver it to you.


I just made my own coffee at home. Cost me about sixteen cents. I'm not proud.
 
2012-02-11 10:20:58 AM  
I still can't get how Facebook is being valued as high as it is. What exactly is their source of profit? Advertising and data mining? Seems like that kind of business only lasts as long as it's the current fad. Hardly a long-term thing on the internet. Or am I missing some really obvious thing that makes this that valuable of a company? Honest question here.
 
2012-02-11 10:21:42 AM  
Wait, don't we all get that for free just by getting married?
 
2012-02-11 10:21:55 AM  
What skill level are we talking about from one to her?

im.videosearch.rediff.com
 
2012-02-11 10:23:01 AM  

ZzeusS: The anguished artist places more value on his privacy than the money.
He explained: 'I cannot buy my privacy back. Every news organisation in the world is beating down the door trying to get an interview and I'm like 'Oh my God'.

I'm gonna note the irony here and move on.


Well he can give me the money. I'll deal with the publicity and when he's broke again, no one will care about him anymore.
 
2012-02-11 10:23:15 AM  

I_Can't_Believe_it's_not_Boutros: I'll do it for a million. Of course, I'll kill him tomorrow.


I seriously think there is a book proposal here. Something like "Strangers on a Train"
 
2012-02-11 10:24:12 AM  

WeenerGord: I just made my own coffee at home. Cost me about sixteen cents. I'm not proud.


I bet your coffee doesn't taste like burnt flesh from Satan's asshole either.

Starbucks = the burnt popcorn of coffees.
 
2012-02-11 10:29:11 AM  

WayToBlue: What skill level are we talking about from one to her?

[im.videosearch.rediff.com image 300x225]


Well worth the investment.
 
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