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(Reuters)   Australian researchers blame odd disappearances of ships on ocean farts. Squid covers beak, points tentacle at crab   ( divider line
    More: Unlikely  
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9329 clicks; posted to Main » on 22 Oct 2003 at 1:00 AM (13 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»

46 Comments     (+0 »)
2003-10-21 10:39:33 PM  
"A recent survey revealed the presence of a sunken vessel within the center of one particularly large eruption site, now known as the Witches Hole."

Goddamn. Killed by a sea witch's pussyfart. Thats gotta suck.
2003-10-22 12:19:19 AM  
Does anyone else remember this on an episode of SeaQuest like 10 years ago (or whenever that show was on the air)? They were having trouble keeping bouyancy, and found out it was air bubbles in the water. Then they mentioned that they were in the middle of the Bermuda triangle or similar area.
2003-10-22 01:08:30 AM  
Okay ... So how long before they start blaming this undersea methane problem on farting cows?

You know that farting cows are causing our greenhouse problems, right? Rush Limbaugh says so!
2003-10-22 01:11:04 AM  
I saw a show about this on the discovery channel a while ago, it was pretty interesting. They would take this scale model cargo ship and subject it to huge waves, and it would not go down. Then, they would bubble a little gas under it and it would drop like a rock. Apparently the really big disruptions of this type can even bring down low flying aircraft.
2003-10-22 01:18:07 AM  
I just tried this in the bathtub with my toy ship. Everything checks out.
2003-10-22 01:19:03 AM  
great headline- (conjuring up mental picture of squid and crab)
2003-10-22 01:19:41 AM  
It was moby dick.

Thar she blows.
2003-10-22 01:24:25 AM  
It's not unlikely, it's probably a fairly sound theory.

Annnnnnd it's not new. This theory has been around - studied and tested in labs - for many years. I've even seen video of a minor methane eruption, I can't recall if it was happening around a ship or a small oil platform, but it was scary looking, as far as you could see the ocean was literally bubbling.
2003-10-22 01:34:15 AM  
oceans can't fart..
2003-10-22 01:38:59 AM  
Nothing new here...move along
2003-10-22 01:43:29 AM  
These aren't the droids we're looking for, they can go about their business...
2003-10-22 01:45:19 AM  
yay a place where I can post this.
I took this a few hours ago in the front yard.

[image from too old to be available]
2003-10-22 01:51:41 AM  
Funsucker, classic! Funny as hell... reminds me of that old (was it eddie murphy?) routine about gi joe in the bathtub..."you can smell it!"

this was posted a while ago (today) under a different headline if i am not incorrect

bermuda triangle explained?
2003-10-22 01:53:45 AM  
There's a skunk thread coming your way.

polishing my totalfark emblem
2003-10-22 01:59:22 AM  
Funsucker....I hope G.I Joe is not in the cave running from the big brown shark!
2003-10-22 02:00:55 AM  
iollow, nobody actually admits to watching Sea Quest.
2003-10-22 02:03:54 AM  
Actually, farting cows (livestock) are a significant source of methane (a greenhouse gas). It's really true.

But ocean farts are going to be a big problem. The reason is that as the oceans warm up from global warming, the methane which is frozen at the bottom of the ocean is going to melt and come to the surface. The end result is that even more methane will enter the atmosphere as a greenhouse gas and cause even more global warming. More global warming means more methane being released from the ocean. (rinse, repeat.) Apparently, there is a lot of methane trapped in the ocean waiting to come to the surface. This could be really bad.
2003-10-22 02:04:35 AM  
I'll admit it, I pictured that squid pointing at the crab......and laughed.

Not good.
2003-10-22 02:07:48 AM  
Nothing wrong with juvenile humor. Hey, its not juvenile if you laughed at it, right?
2003-10-22 02:11:39 AM  
And we just had a thread a while ago of a whale being caught letting one go.

Props to the headline writer!
2003-10-22 02:14:22 AM  
i wish there was an onomatopoetic spelling for the sound eddie made when he simulated the fart bubble rising to the surface of the tub

sigh...grade school...good times, good times
2003-10-22 02:20:01 AM  
Fuzzmosis, Thanks man. I was thinking more warped than juvenile....Hehehehehehehe..can't get that damn squid out of my head....New term...not earworm...mind's eye worm?
2003-10-22 02:22:23 AM  
charly gordon
2003-10-22 02:22:40 AM  
charly gordon...bdludludlooop?
2003-10-22 02:24:10 AM  
Funsucker...not even close man.
2003-10-22 02:28:07 AM  
dudes, Funsucker and RayD8!

you guys did much better than i would have!

another favorite of mine was when he chased his sisters around with the DOO DOO stick...

2003-10-22 02:42:38 AM  
I'm with charly gordon...To listen firstly, but to remember and quote it...mmphh
2003-10-22 02:52:44 AM  
Hey, squid, the one who denied it supplied it...
2003-10-22 03:43:05 AM  
You know, I had no idea when I made the Rush Limbaugh-cowfart reference how many of you weirdos actually hang on every word the man says.

You know that this is the guy who says, with regard to global warming, that the scientists don't know what they're talking about. He has actually come out and stated that the Republican point of view about global warming is the correct one, and that the scientists around the world who disagree with that view are wrong. He discounts their view as being liberally biased.

And before any of you get huffy on me, YES, he DID say that ... In fact, he has made this assertion on multiple occasions.
2003-10-22 03:54:11 AM  
I don't know what the fat one said, or care.

"You know that this is the guy who says, with regard to global warming, that the scientists don't know what they're talking about."

An odd statement given that many scientists think humans are not responsible for global warming. I don't see why it's so hard to understand that if we have only a very limited length of historical temperature information, and we're talking about temperature changes of 'mere' degrees over long periods of time, and we know that the earth has been around a long damned time and that many climatic patterns/cycles evolve over centuries if not several centuries ... well, maybe we can't really say for certain that the newest filters and 'clean burning' fuels are really going to change the course of the planet's weather all that much.
2003-10-22 04:05:52 AM  
With all due respect, sandreckoner, I have to disagree.

First, our "length of historical temperature information" goes back more than 50,000 years, thanks to nifty science like the examination of polar ice cores.

Second, the vast, vast majority of scientists currently agree that we seem to be experiencing the beginning of a substantial period of global warming which is significantly caused by human activity. All major international scientific bodies agree on this. Even the Bush administration has agreed that it's true. The occasional scientist disagreeing -- even if climatology happens to be his or her field -- is not persuasive.

Third, there's absolutely nothing "mere" about the change in temperature. Consider how much energy you have to pump into the atmosphere and oceans to produce 'merely' one degree of average temperature rise. That energy goes into intensifying weather activity. It ain't minor. It's a lot.

Fourth, every major international scientific body that has considered the problem agreed, within the last three years, that we almost certainly could reduce the damage to society if we took reasonable action promptly. By "reasonable", I mean that the economic damage would be much less if we took that action than if we didn't.

Fifth, the Earth is not in danger. It's not going to melt, or anything. The ecosystem faces major upheaval, but it's survived plenty of upheaval before.

No. What's threatened is modern society, plain and simple. It, too, won't likely be destroyed, but the costs of global warming are already enormous (talk to anyone in maritime shipping, for starters, or at the CDC, or in agricultural studies, or at the WHO, or in Paris), and it looks like they're going to get a lot worse.

You, as an individual, don't have to believe it. It won't change things one way or the other . . . although I'd sell certain kinds of coastal properties, if I were you, and maybe invest in companies that are developing vaccines for malaria. If the experts are all wrong, then, fine, they're wrong. Seems unlikely, and it seems pretty foolish to believe that, but who knows? But maybe smoking doesn't cause cancer, too.
2003-10-22 04:33:52 AM  
Again pulling out the "saw it on Discovery Channel" anecdote, this can happen. They had a show on about drilling in the North Sea and camera footage was shown that was taken from a helicopter circling a rig that had the misfortune to cause an uncontrolled release of gas (presumably natural gas) off the ocean floor. The affected area was a circle of water about 500 feet in diameter, and one of the support floats for the rig was within that circle of aerated water. It was abundantly clear that particular float wasn't really doing any "floating" at that moment, and the rig was pitched about 20 degrees in that direction. So yeah, if a large enough bunch of this stuff boiled to the surface right underneath a passing boat, said boat would be pretty farked, and you'd have some really confused sailor folk on board, who may not be all that buoyant themselves as well.. That'd suck.
2003-10-22 05:42:58 AM  
Random Axe has it sussed. Heeaavvyyyy
2003-10-22 06:21:28 AM  
Apparently this is something that ocean based oil drilling teams have been scared about from the get go: If you tap a major natural gas bubble, and it blows out around the drilling shaft, you're in a world of hurt: not only from the fire hazard, but woe be to anything attempting to float in the vicinity. An entire platform can sink within two minutes, with very little warning.

You should see the "Michelin Man" rescue suits: They blow up to several times their original size, providing the necessary boyancy for a person to float in water which has been severely gassified.

Scary shiat.
2003-10-22 07:03:42 AM  
An 1800's London ferry disaster was caused by a large eruption of sewer gas. The boat foundered and many of the drownings were caused when passengers were unable to float or swim in the gas saturated water.

I don't know how possible the methane thing is in the ocean, but it can definitely happen in a river.
2003-10-22 09:06:13 AM  
You know, it just makes sense.
2003-10-22 09:59:03 AM  
I'm happy to see that it's down to a science. YAY.
2003-10-22 10:05:54 AM  
So, do most whale songs have lyrics like this?

Beans, beans, the musical fruit
the more you eat, the more you toot
the more you toot, the better you feel
and soon you're ready for another meal.
2003-10-22 10:45:28 AM  
Whoopsie! No such thing as liquid carbon, there IS such a thing as liquid methane. Back to school for me!
2003-10-22 11:21:56 AM  
I'll bet THAT'S what happened to everyone who got "lost" in the bermuda triangle.
2003-10-22 11:28:23 AM  

old skool Fark
2003-10-22 11:36:52 AM  
Dammit, Githerax beat me to it.

Either way,

2003-10-22 02:50:06 PM  
That Discover feature also mentioned a theory that a huge methane release occurred at the end of the last ice due to a subsurface landslide near Norway. Because of this release earth's temperatures rose to today's levels in a few years instead of What should have taken centuries. If another release of this size happened now we'd be farked.
2003-10-22 02:51:09 PM  
That Discover feature also mentioned a theory that a huge methane release occurred at the end of the last ice due to a subsurface landslide near Norway. Because of this release earth's temperatures rose to today's levels in a few years instead of What should have taken centuries. If another release of this size happened now we'd be farked.
2003-10-22 03:01:24 PM  
2003-10-22 03:03:14 PM  
It's all Cthulhu's fault.
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