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(Some Guy) Stupid Problem: You have a city full of people who have no ability whatsoever to parallel park. Solution: Stop testing parallel parking on the driving test. Ta-Da, problem solved   (dcist.com) divider line 126
More: Stupid, Ford Explorer  
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6543 clicks; posted to Main » on 09 Feb 2012 at 11:01 PM   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»   |    Get this fabulous T-Shirt and impress the methane out of your friends! shirt it!



126 Comments   (+0 »)
   
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2012-02-09 07:44:02 PM
Seems to me what they're saying is that they pretty much can never find a place to do it during most road tests, which is certainly reasonable.

I know in Wisconsin, you only have to do it if the DMV tester sees a place for you to do it. I didn't have to, though I can parallel park just fine because I'm a man.
 
2012-02-09 07:53:54 PM
When I got my license over a decade ago, in Virginia, they weren't testing parallel parking then.
 
2012-02-09 08:00:27 PM
You don't have to parallel park in CT
 
2012-02-09 08:12:36 PM
To be fair, you could probably count the number of times I've parallel parked since getting my license on one hand.
 
2012-02-09 08:19:02 PM
Living in a city requires parallel parking. It should be a required test.
 
2012-02-09 08:19:24 PM
The Pocket Ninja Driving Test:

1) Parallel park, backing in. You may shift out of reverse once to realign, but any more and you fail.
2) Regular parking, nose-in. You must pull your car into the spot in one fluid motion with no need to shift into reverse, and none of the tires on your vehicle may be touching either line.
3) Highway merging. You must merge onto a normal highway from a normal onramp without once touching your brakes or negatively impacting traffic flow on the highway.
4) Hill climbing. You must maintain your speed with no measurable slowdown while driving upgrade.
5) Wall affinity. You must demonstrate an ability to drive your vehicle beside a construction wall or other barrier without once edging away from it and into the neighboring lane.
6) Left turn ability. You must demonstrate at least three separate and consecutive left turns that involve no movement by your vehicle to the right.
7) Right turn ability. You must demonstrate at least three separate and consecutive right turns that involve no tires coming into contact with the curb.
8) Radar awareness. You must demonstrate an ability to drive past a police cruiser parked beside the highway without slamming on your brakes in blind reflex.
9) Passing competence. You must demonstrate an aversion to passing on the right in all but the most extreme circumstances. Right-hand passes undertaken during the test will likely result in failure.
10) Conversation competence. You must demonstrate an ongoing ability to converse with your passenger without averting your eyes from the road. Any need for more than a fleeting glance sideways will result in failure.
10)
 
2012-02-09 08:36:20 PM
California stopped testing parallel parking years ago. I live in San Francisco you have to know how parallel park here.
 
2012-02-09 08:43:16 PM
I lived out in the burbs for the first five years of my license. Never once reversed park in the entire time I was there. Then I moved to the inner city and every single park for the next 10 years was a reverse park. I honed the skill so well I could reverse park on a 5c piece.

Then I bought a motorbike and the wife is the only one who uses the car now (mostly). I had to reverse park it yesterday, took me 3 attempts. Farking sad.

/true story
 
2012-02-09 09:09:26 PM
Phoenix_M: California stopped testing parallel parking years ago. I live in San Francisco you have to know how parallel park here.

Not to mention knowing the meaning of "curb your wheels"
 
2012-02-09 09:11:46 PM
I never got tested on parallel parking. Got my license around a decade ago, here in TN.
 
2012-02-09 09:46:05 PM
ArkAngel: Seems to me what they're saying is that they pretty much can never find a place to do it during most road tests, which is certainly reasonable.

I know in Wisconsin, you only have to do it if the DMV tester sees a place for you to do it. I didn't have to, though I can parallel park just fine because I'm a man.


Here in vegas they just put 2 metal poles in the DMV parking lot about 3 feet tall and with enough room to park between em. You can fail the driving test before you even leave the parking lot
 
2012-02-09 09:53:44 PM
I took my driving test in Maine and couldn't find two cars to park between. They made me park behind someone, but that's hardly difficult.
 
2012-02-09 10:15:27 PM
Tested twice, both in Massachusetts. No parallel parking required.
 
2012-02-09 10:48:47 PM
Pocket Ninja: The Pocket Ninja Driving Test:

1) Parallel park, backing in. You may shift out of reverse once to realign, but any more and you fail.
2) Regular parking, nose-in. You must pull your car into the spot in one fluid motion with no need to shift into reverse, and none of the tires on your vehicle may be touching either line.
3) Highway merging. You must merge onto a normal highway from a normal onramp without once touching your brakes or negatively impacting traffic flow on the highway.
4) Hill climbing. You must maintain your speed with no measurable slowdown while driving upgrade.
5) Wall affinity. You must demonstrate an ability to drive your vehicle beside a construction wall or other barrier without once edging away from it and into the neighboring lane.
6) Left turn ability. You must demonstrate at least three separate and consecutive left turns that involve no movement by your vehicle to the right.
7) Right turn ability. You must demonstrate at least three separate and consecutive right turns that involve no tires coming into contact with the curb.
8) Radar awareness. You must demonstrate an ability to drive past a police cruiser parked beside the highway without slamming on your brakes in blind reflex.
9) Passing competence. You must demonstrate an aversion to passing on the right in all but the most extreme circumstances. Right-hand passes undertaken during the test will likely result in failure.
10) Conversation competence. You must demonstrate an ongoing ability to converse with your passenger without averting your eyes from the road. Any need for more than a fleeting glance sideways will result in failure.
10)


Pretty basic rules. Now what was 10 the second?
 
2012-02-09 11:01:22 PM
jaylectricity: Pretty basic rules. Now what was 10 the second?

Style and poise.
 
2012-02-09 11:05:03 PM
AbbeySomeone: Living in a city requires parallel parking. It should be a required test.

if you have to do it, you'll learn it. I wasn't a strong parallel parker until I moved to a city. I became a motherfarking expert in a week.
 
2012-02-09 11:08:39 PM
Pocket Ninja: jaylectricity: Pretty basic rules. Now what was 10 the second?

Style and poise.


I was gonna say tact and subtlety.
 
2012-02-09 11:08:43 PM
In PA when I got my license, you have to parallel park, but you can do the pull in frontways method, and there's no cars or anything in the way, as it is a closed track. As long as you're within a foot of the curb you're fine.
 
2012-02-09 11:09:56 PM
jaylectricity: Pocket Ninja: The Pocket Ninja Driving Test:

1) Parallel park, backing in. You may shift out of reverse once to realign, but any more and you fail.
2) Regular parking, nose-in. You must pull your car into the spot in one fluid motion with no need to shift into reverse, and none of the tires on your vehicle may be touching either line.
3) Highway merging. You must merge onto a normal highway from a normal onramp without once touching your brakes or negatively impacting traffic flow on the highway.
4) Hill climbing. You must maintain your speed with no measurable slowdown while driving upgrade.
5) Wall affinity. You must demonstrate an ability to drive your vehicle beside a construction wall or other barrier without once edging away from it and into the neighboring lane.
6) Left turn ability. You must demonstrate at least three separate and consecutive left turns that involve no movement by your vehicle to the right.
7) Right turn ability. You must demonstrate at least three separate and consecutive right turns that involve no tires coming into contact with the curb.
8) Radar awareness. You must demonstrate an ability to drive past a police cruiser parked beside the highway without slamming on your brakes in blind reflex.
9) Passing competence. You must demonstrate an aversion to passing on the right in all but the most extreme circumstances. Right-hand passes undertaken during the test will likely result in failure.
10) Conversation competence. You must demonstrate an ongoing ability to converse with your passenger without averting your eyes from the road. Any need for more than a fleeting glance sideways will result in failure.
10)

Pretty basic rules. Now what was 10 the second?


How about "The fast lane is forbidden to anyone driving a Prius"
 
2012-02-09 11:11:14 PM
Or even, "There's a reason it's called the fast lane, move over"
 
2012-02-09 11:11:20 PM
If they wanted the tests to be accurate, the driver should have to parallel park with the stereo blasting while talking on the phone, texting, and eating a taco.
 
2012-02-09 11:14:05 PM
It's not that I don't know, it's that 90% of the time, I get the Corey Haim version from License to Drive, not the hot chick 30 feet on either side version.
Oh, and Pocket Ninja, amend number 3, if you're driving in a merge lane, EG the far right, slow the FARK down to allow the car to merge as well. Your life is not going to end because 1 car gets ahead of you.
 
2012-02-09 11:14:39 PM
MaudlinMutantMollusk: Phoenix_M: California stopped testing parallel parking years ago. I live in San Francisco you have to know how parallel park here.

Not to mention knowing the meaning of "curb your wheels"


Hah! Was here to say the same thing. I really wish I had been there the day the city discovered the need for this law. In my fondest dreams, it involves a Hummer H2 from the top of Nob Hill.
 
2012-02-09 11:16:18 PM
Well how the hell can anyone be expected to parallel park when they have to use their other hand to hold their phones?
 
2012-02-09 11:17:29 PM
San Diego, 96, no parallel parking tests.

Thank god!

Took written test three times, got by on a technicality, but got 100% on driving. So nah!!
 
2012-02-09 11:17:50 PM
Phoenix_M: California stopped testing parallel parking years ago. I live in San Francisco you have to know how parallel park here.

When I got my license in 2001, the "parallel parking" bit was driving up to a curb and parking. Not the "tricky" (being male, I can do this due to genetics with relative ease) pull up next to car in front of space and back in method.
 
2012-02-09 11:18:41 PM
DeadGeek: How about "The fast lane is forbidden to anyone driving a Prius"

As long as I can still hit cruise control at the speed limit in the "fast lane."

/Want me to speed in the fast lane?
//Don't prosecute me for speeding.
///Traffic cases in California are criminal cases (infraction level) and titled "The People of the State of California v ____"
//Just giving "The People" what they want.
/Don't like it, look in a mirror.
 
2012-02-09 11:19:51 PM
Ryker's Peninsula: If they wanted the tests to be accurate, the driver should have to parallel park with the stereo blasting while talking on the phone, texting, and eating a taco.

I can't see when she does that.
 
2012-02-09 11:20:00 PM
ArkAngel: Seems to me what they're saying is that they pretty much can never find a place to do it during most road tests, which is certainly reasonable.

What fail. They used a portion of the DMV parking lot with cones when I took the test.

Advice from my driver's ed teacher: It's only worth 4 points on the test and if you hit the cones or jump the curb it's an automatic failure so if you aren't confident you can do it, don't even try.

I can do it, but in reality I almost never have to parallel park. I think it's been about 10 years since I had to fit into a single space. Usually the places I parallel park are open enough I just pull over to the curb.
 
2012-02-09 11:20:51 PM
Ohio didn't have a parallel parking test when I got my license 12 years ago. They had a maneuverability test, which involves five traffic cones. If you bump one, you fail.
 
2012-02-09 11:21:03 PM
DeadGeek: Or even, "There's a reason it's called the fast lane, move over"

There is no such thing as a "fast lane". Perhaps you mean the passing lane. And if you're not currently in the act of passing someone then you shouldn't be in that lane.
 
2012-02-09 11:21:26 PM
OK totaly unrelated to TFA, but when the fuhk are the mods going to green light a headline about the foreclosure/abusive lending deal, goddamnitsoverymuch!?1!?!!?
 
2012-02-09 11:23:18 PM
zulius: It's not that I don't know, it's that 90% of the time, I get the Corey Haim version from License to Drive, not the hot chick 30 feet on either side version.
Oh, and Pocket Ninja, amend number 3, if you're driving in a merge lane, EG the far right, slow the FARK down to allow the car to merge as well. Your life is not going to end because 1 car gets ahead of you.


Can we make an exception for the enema nozzles who think that they are exempt from waiting when the off ramp backs up onto the freeway?
 
2012-02-09 11:23:25 PM
optional solution:

gallery.wonderart.us
 
2012-02-09 11:24:30 PM
Yeah, my Mom's generation had it down.

www.clevelandseniors.com
 
2012-02-09 11:24:42 PM
I live in a city and I haven't parallel parked since my test 10 years ago. It's only a necessity if you drive some kinda enormous SUV type thing.
 
2012-02-09 11:24:55 PM
SquiggelyGrounders: OK totaly unrelated to TFA, but when the fuhk are the mods going to green light a headline about the foreclosure/abusive lending deal, goddamnitsoverymuch!?1!?!!?

Eventually they'll post one, then another, then pull the later as a duplicate leaving you wondering if 5 dollars would make a difference. So there's that.
 
2012-02-09 11:26:04 PM
MusicMakeMyHeadPound: DeadGeek: Or even, "There's a reason it's called the fast lane, move over"

There is no such thing as a "fast lane". Perhaps you mean the passing lane. And if you're not currently in the act of passing someone then you shouldn't be in that lane.


Not all of us live in bum fark nowhere populated with 2 lane highways. Heck, except on the 15 out towards Vegas, I can't think of any 2 lane/direction freeways in the LA/OC/Riverside area. The norm seems to be around 4 lanes/direction.
 
2012-02-09 11:29:23 PM
A lot of places have stopped doing this, mostly because it's just not done anymore in most places. Personally I cant remember needing to parallel park once in the last 20 years.
 
2012-02-09 11:30:18 PM
ThatGuyFromTheInternet: Tested twice, both in Massachusetts. No parallel parking required.

nocturn: San Diego, 96, no parallel parking tests.

Thank god!

Took written test three times, got by on a technicality, but got 100% on driving. So nah!!


How the hell does anyone fail their driving test?

People who fail should not be allowed to take the test for another 6 months. We should also make the tests harder AND have a specialized track to test driving in bad weather conditions.
 
2012-02-09 11:32:42 PM
Pocket Ninja: jaylectricity: Pretty basic rules. Now what was 10 the second?

Style and poise.


How about spacial awareness.

At a random point in the test, after driving on the highway for at least 10 minutes, you have to be able to tell me, without looking, what cars are in what lanes around you, and if they are going faster or slower than you.

/Bonus points if you can tell color, make, and model.
 
2012-02-09 11:34:10 PM
JPINFV: MusicMakeMyHeadPound: DeadGeek: Or even, "There's a reason it's called the fast lane, move over"

There is no such thing as a "fast lane". Perhaps you mean the passing lane. And if you're not currently in the act of passing someone then you shouldn't be in that lane.

Not all of us live in bum fark nowhere populated with 2 lane highways. Heck, except on the 15 out towards Vegas, I can't think of any 2 lane/direction freeways in the LA/OC/Riverside area. The norm seems to be around 4 lanes/direction.


He is referring to this (new window). Fast lane is just what the people to the right call it.

/motorcyclist
//lanes??
 
2012-02-09 11:35:02 PM
beantowndog: I took my driving test in Maine and couldn't find two cars to park between. They made me park behind someone, but that's hardly difficult.

Same with me over 30 years ago. Had to parallel park but only behind a single car. Think the reason at that time was they didn't want you hitting other vehicles during the test. Kinda messes with their schedule.
 
2012-02-09 11:37:46 PM
ReapTheChaos: A lot of places have stopped doing this, mostly because it's just not done anymore in most places. Personally I cant remember needing to parallel park once in the last 20 years.

Doesn't matter if you need to parallel park or not (IMHO).

It is a basic test of your awareness of the dimensions of the vehicle you are driving, and its position relative to the cars around it.

The same skills are used when pulling around a car stuck in traffic, executing a 3 point turn, or just parking in a damned parking lot.
 
2012-02-09 11:37:50 PM
No parallel parking test in Florida. I have no clue how to parallel park (though I'm sure it can't be that difficult) but I've never seen where it would be necessary anywhere I've lived.
 
2012-02-09 11:37:55 PM
Pocket Ninja: 2) Regular parking, nose-in. You must pull your car into the spot in one fluid motion with no need to shift into reverse, and none of the tires on your vehicle may be touching either line.

Not always an option for longer vehicles (extended cab pick-ups for example) unless you have one clear spot next to the target spot. In most cases I will just back in, provided there is not someone hanging on my bumper as drive up the aisle. They never seem to understand what's happening and try to go around or steal the spot. In tight lots where I need to get between two other vehicles, backing in is *always* faster (and so much easier), so is getting out.

I can also parallel park it.
 
2012-02-09 11:40:23 PM
Just pull real close next to the car in front before backing in.

Cut the butter in coarsely and add only enough water to hold the dough together.

Parallel parking & perfect piecrusts - skills a man must have.
 
2012-02-09 11:42:46 PM
Pocket Ninja: The Pocket Ninja Driving Test:

1) Parallel park, backing in. You may shift out of reverse once to realign, but any more and you fail.
2) Regular parking, nose-in. You must pull your car into the spot in one fluid motion with no need to shift into reverse, and none of the tires on your vehicle may be touching either line.
3) Highway merging. You must merge onto a normal highway from a normal onramp without once touching your brakes or negatively impacting traffic flow on the highway.
4) Hill climbing. You must maintain your speed with no measurable slowdown while driving upgrade.
5) Wall affinity. You must demonstrate an ability to drive your vehicle beside a construction wall or other barrier without once edging away from it and into the neighboring lane.
6) Left turn ability. You must demonstrate at least three separate and consecutive left turns that involve no movement by your vehicle to the right.
7) Right turn ability. You must demonstrate at least three separate and consecutive right turns that involve no tires coming into contact with the curb.
8) Radar awareness. You must demonstrate an ability to drive past a police cruiser parked beside the highway without slamming on your brakes in blind reflex.
9) Passing competence. You must demonstrate an aversion to passing on the right in all but the most extreme circumstances. Right-hand passes undertaken during the test will likely result in failure.
10) Conversation competence. You must demonstrate an ongoing ability to converse with your passenger without averting your eyes from the road. Any need for more than a fleeting glance sideways will result in failure.
10)


Amendment: Being passed on the right hand side during the exam will immediately result in failure. Right hand passes may be undertaken during the exam only if the driver proceeds to cut off the offending car, jam on his brakes, and hold the windshield wiping fluid down for a sustained time period, the instructor will utilize this time to throw any random garbage in the vehicle out the passenger window. This will be the only time cigarettes will be allowed during the exam, with the butt of the cigarette disposed of properly over the roof of the car. This may continue during the exam for however long it takes for the offending driver to properly switch lanes, and the testee will immediately be given a passing score.
 
2012-02-09 11:47:34 PM
I just had to park in back of a car because the tester didn't see two cars to park between during the test. Living in Madison you quickly become proficient at parallel parking on both sides from all the one way streets downtown. Well, if you drive downtown and don't want to spend money on parking anyway.
 
2012-02-09 11:48:44 PM
noazark: optional solution:

[gallery.wonderart.us image 400x300]


If you can't manage that, just be sure to be caught on a sideways camera
 
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