Burgess also noted that humans, by harvesting the creatures for food, continue to pose a greater threat to sharks than they do to us.


"We're killing 30 to 70 million sharks a year in fisheries around the world," Burgess said. "It's pretty obvious who's the real winner and who's the loser in these interactions."

While I appreciate the comment, did this belong in this article? Fisheries aren't the open ocean, are they?

My chances of being attacked by a shark are, as the article points, out nearly infinitesimal seeing as I live at an elevation of about 888 feet, give or take. Excuse me while I answer the door--it seems somebody has sent me a candy gram ....

BA-DUMP.

They told me I was going swimming with dolphins


Damn you, Ricky!

My theory is that sharks have saved far more people from drowning than they have ever killed, and are thus net benefactors of humanity. For this we repay them by killing them mercilessly and cruelly and eating their fins.

They deserve our respect and thanks, for they are the garde-fou* of the sea. And we should make a real effort not to look like seals when we go swimming, as it wastes their time. Even today, most humans are too skinny to be of interest to a great white. They prefer nice plump sea mammals or, at the limit, your mother.

*That's French, Tish! LIterally it means "guard fool". It designates a railing, hand rail, or parapet designed to keep idiots from killing themselves. It's one of my favourite French phrases, as it is so eloquently literal.