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(Wired)   Maximum Trolling - Man claims he actually invented the internet and sues Google, Youtube, Yahoo and Amazon for using his invention   (wired.com) divider line 103
    More: Amusing, YouTube, Google, Yahoo, Amazon, Tim Berners-Lee, software patents, Rent-A-Center, East Texas  
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14187 clicks; posted to Main » on 08 Feb 2012 at 10:53 AM (3 years ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2012-02-08 10:55:03 AM  
Al Gore will do anything for attention these days...
 
2012-02-08 10:55:16 AM  
If he gets a black turtleneck and some sycophants, he may prevail.
 
2012-02-08 10:55:21 AM  
2.bp.blogspot.com

/oblig
//hot
 
2012-02-08 10:59:14 AM  
I don't even find stuff like this surprising anymore...
 
2012-02-08 10:59:58 AM  
1.bp.blogspot.com

Amateurs..
 
2012-02-08 11:01:48 AM  
the "interactive web" before anyone else, while they were employed by the University of California back in 1993. Doyle argues that a program he created at UC's San Francisco

1993? Sure sure....and the earth is only 6000 years old too.
 
2012-02-08 11:02:17 AM  
Al Gore changed his name and moved to Texas? If he's in witness protection, he's doing it wrong.
 
2012-02-08 11:03:41 AM  
They said I could be anything ... so I became a PATENT TROLL
 
2012-02-08 11:04:15 AM  
OH YEAH? Well I'm his biological father, and I copywrote my DNA and any thing he invents is Mine Mine Mine by default, as I'm the parent coporation.

So there!
 
2012-02-08 11:05:41 AM  
I hope he wins, that may finally bring attention to Congress about how broken the system is!

/Fark! It's still the Do-Nothings in there, isn't it?
 
2012-02-08 11:05:45 AM  
but did he ride the moon worm?
 
2012-02-08 11:09:32 AM  
Damn, I knew I should have patented my idea in 1983.
 
2012-02-08 11:14:27 AM  
I wish this and 1000 more just like it upon them. I'm so tired of this patent bullshiat. MS, Google, Yahoo, Amazon ... have done nothing but squash innovation in the computer industry. Then they will go , oh patent trolls are bad, and in the next blink of an eye are whipping out their patent lawyers. Obviously the only patents they are worried about are the ones they don't own.
Die by the jab of a billion needles.

First Presidential candidate that says " We are going to install a copy machine in the patent office and all patents will be a dime a page " gets my vote.
 
2012-02-08 11:14:51 AM  
I invented Gremlins in my bathtub on mushrooms in the late seventies. You don't see me going around suing people.
 
2012-02-08 11:16:29 AM  

vudukungfu: OH YEAH? Well I'm his biological father, and I copywrote my DNA and any thing he invents is Mine Mine Mine by default, as I'm the parent coporation.

So there!


Heh, crafty! ;-)
 
2012-02-08 11:17:14 AM  
Just remember, IBM has patented patent trolling. Seriously.

/Help us, IBM. You're our only hope.
 
2012-02-08 11:22:52 AM  

The Irresponsible Captain: I hope he wins, that may finally bring attention to Congress about how broken the system is!


this and

Lt. Cheese Weasel: 1993? Sure sure....and the earth is only 6000 years old too


that
 
2012-02-08 11:24:04 AM  

TF2_Pyro: Al Gore will do anything for attention these days...


Al's moved past that and is now inventing the first cable news channel with a definite political agenda.
 
2012-02-08 11:26:35 AM  
I totaly submitted this article first, AND with a better headline. I am going to sue subby.
I am seeking 23 Kajillion dollars. But if you wish to settle out of court, I will except one (1) TotalFark sponsership.
 
2012-02-08 11:29:11 AM  
What a difference 13 years makes.

2012: Claiming to invent the internet = maximum trolling
1999: Claiming to invent the internet = campaigning
 
2012-02-08 11:29:44 AM  

baggins2000: First Presidential candidate that says " We are going to install a copy machine in the patent office and all patents will be a dime a page " gets my vote.


Have you ever read a patent? They are usually around 10 pages long so that dime a page is still nothing compared to the near $10,000 you need to file and maintain a patent.
 
2012-02-08 11:29:45 AM  
ARPANET is not available for comment due to its sulking in the corner over the internet being so popular and getting all the girls.
 
2012-02-08 11:35:57 AM  
I invented air. So ether pay me or stop breathing.
 
2012-02-08 11:38:51 AM  
Having spent some time this summer employed inthe patent troll wars, I've come to the conclusion that tech patents, in particular, software and "business method" type patents need the following, immediate reforms

1) They need to be shorter than regular patents: No more than 5 years. 5 years is a full generation in the tech world, the patents shouldn't be for longer than that absent some truly special circumstances

2) The need to have a "use it or lose it" clause. Unless you are actively trying to market the idea or implement it on a commercial basis somehow, you patent expires as soon as someone else does.

3) There needs to be a "burden of notice" similar to the one for Copyrights. You have a reasonable duty of Due Dillegence relating to your patent and if you become aware that someone is using/selling something you have to notify them IMMEDIATELY or you either a) lose the patent altogether or b) are forced to license it to them at set, standard rates; none of this waiting until years later when billion-dollar industries now depend on your "patent" to sue
 
2012-02-08 11:41:32 AM  
So does this mean I invented a time machine since I connected my High School to the internet back in 1989 to participate in newsgroups (connected via dialup to Cal Poly SLO, Gopher was so much fun before www came out).
 
2012-02-08 11:46:42 AM  
Isn't there a clause in the patent system that allows the judge to declare that enforcing the patent would cause significant harm to society and thus is invalidated?
 
2012-02-08 11:47:06 AM  

Magorn: Having spent some time this summer employed inthe patent troll wars, I've come to the conclusion that tech patents, in particular, software and "business method" type patents need the following, immediate reforms

1) They need to be shorter than regular patents: No more than 5 years. 5 years is a full generation in the tech world, the patents shouldn't be for longer than that absent some truly special circumstances

2) The need to have a "use it or lose it" clause. Unless you are actively trying to market the idea or implement it on a commercial basis somehow, you patent expires as soon as someone else does.

3) There needs to be a "burden of notice" similar to the one for Copyrights. You have a reasonable duty of Due Dillegence relating to your patent and if you become aware that someone is using/selling something you have to notify them IMMEDIATELY or you either a) lose the patent altogether or b) are forced to license it to them at set, standard rates; none of this waiting until years later when billion-dollar industries now depend on your "patent" to sue


I scanned quickly through the patent, and it literally is a claim to have invented the internet as it exists today in its entirety, including the basic interaction between browsers and servers and the inner workings of how browsers handle requests for information.

My mind is boggled that such a broad patent was granted. Was the patent office sleeping on the job? Or is this just an indictment of how the patent system is flawed?
 
2012-02-08 11:49:04 AM  
There will be no further misuse of this channel. You are disturbing others who are using it to serious purpose. Access will be restored when you understand what it is for.
 
2012-02-08 11:50:34 AM  
This is actually a good thing, it will bring more attention to how stupid and abused software patents can be.
 
2012-02-08 11:52:36 AM  

Magorn: Having spent some time this summer employed inthe patent troll wars, I've come to the conclusion that tech patents, in particular, software and "business method" type patents need the following, immediate reforms

1) They need to be shorter than regular patents: No more than 5 years. 5 years is a full generation in the tech world, the patents shouldn't be for longer than that absent some truly special circumstances

2) The need to have a "use it or lose it" clause. Unless you are actively trying to market the idea or implement it on a commercial basis somehow, you patent expires as soon as someone else does.

3) There needs to be a "burden of notice" similar to the one for Copyrights. You have a reasonable duty of Due Dillegence relating to your patent and if you become aware that someone is using/selling something you have to notify them IMMEDIATELY or you either a) lose the patent altogether or b) are forced to license it to them at set, standard rates; none of this waiting until years later when billion-dollar industries now depend on your "patent" to sue


i.imgur.com

/ this man has it
// doing away with software patents completely is also an acceptable position
 
2012-02-08 12:16:59 PM  

Ace25: So does this mean I invented a time machine since I connected my High School to the internet back in 1989 to participate in newsgroups (connected via dialup to Cal Poly SLO, Gopher was so much fun before www came out).


Ah, gopher, good times.

\\I like green screens
\interactive web pissant.
 
2012-02-08 12:26:38 PM  
I should consider patenting the wheel...
 
2012-02-08 12:33:40 PM  

sure haven't: [2.bp.blogspot.com image 640x426]

/oblig
//hot


holly crap, until know I hadn't noticed the maximum trolling meme had a England map on it.
 
2012-02-08 12:37:29 PM  
I invented the question mark!

Fark will be hearing from my lawyers as I file for $1,000,000,000 in damages for each of the 14 uses on this page alone.

I too will settle out of court for a TF membership.

//I will also sell my patent for 'captioning photographic images of felines using questionable grammatical and spelling skills' for a subscription to UtraF.......carrier lost
 
2012-02-08 12:41:53 PM  
The government should just size these patents under some eminent domain like thing and put them in the public domain. They can size land to build a highway than surely they can size IP to keep the internet highway going. The damage that these patent trolls could do to the economy is so great that simply declaring any IP necessary for the basic function of the Web to be in the public domain should be justified.
 
2012-02-08 12:42:10 PM  

Cereal Fetish: What a difference 13 years makes.

2012: Claiming to invent the internet = maximum trolling
1999: Claiming to invent the internet = campaigning

1991: High Performance Computing and Communication Act of 1991 (HPCA) = Legislating
 
2012-02-08 12:44:32 PM  
i1136.photobucket.com
 
2012-02-08 12:45:53 PM  
Before reading it, I'm going to assume that he was born after I'd started using the Internet.
 
2012-02-08 12:46:40 PM  
I was about to say: "Meh, I'll find something and submit an OA to CRE within the week".

But holy mother of god, it's already been re-examed.
 
2012-02-08 12:47:04 PM  

Linoleum_Blownapart: Cereal Fetish: What a difference 13 years makes.

2012: Claiming to invent the internet = maximum trolling
1999: Claiming to invent the internet = propaganda by the GOP
1991: High Performance Computing and Communication Act of 1991 (HPCA) = Legislating

 
2012-02-08 01:29:24 PM  

vudukungfu: OH YEAH? Well I'm his biological father, and I copywrote my DNA and any thing he invents is Mine Mine Mine by default, as I'm the parent coporation.

So there!


Your patent expired when he turned 18.
 
2012-02-08 01:31:41 PM  

Cereal Fetish: What a difference 13 years makes.

2012: Claiming to invent the internet = maximum trolling
1999: Claiming to invent the internet = campaigning


Apparently, 13 years makes no difference at all:
1999: Saying Al Gore claimed he invented the internet (new window) = willful ignorance or partisan propagandizing
2012: Saying Al Gore claimed he invented the internet = willful ignorance or partisan propagandizing
 
2012-02-08 01:33:09 PM  
Eliminate software patents. Software is nothing more than a recipie for your device to use to- as an analogy- "cook" something on its own for your personal consumption.
 
2012-02-08 01:37:14 PM  

LOTN: Magorn: Having spent some time this summer employed inthe patent troll wars, I've come to the conclusion that tech patents, in particular, software and "business method" type patents need the following, immediate reforms

1) They need to be shorter than regular patents: No more than 5 years. 5 years is a full generation in the tech world, the patents shouldn't be for longer than that absent some truly special circumstances

2) The need to have a "use it or lose it" clause. Unless you are actively trying to market the idea or implement it on a commercial basis somehow, you patent expires as soon as someone else does.

3) There needs to be a "burden of notice" similar to the one for Copyrights. You have a reasonable duty of Due Dillegence relating to your patent and if you become aware that someone is using/selling something you have to notify them IMMEDIATELY or you either a) lose the patent altogether or b) are forced to license it to them at set, standard rates; none of this waiting until years later when billion-dollar industries now depend on your "patent" to sue

[i.imgur.com image 288x288]

/ this man has it
// doing away with software patents completely is also an acceptable position


You speak of Adverse Possession, aka Squatter's Rights, a facet of the Doctrine of Laches (new window). Note: "Eminent Domain" is often a misapplied term confused with Adverse Possession, never mix these up. Eminent Domain is the government's right to condemn/seize property for public good.

Laches is more of a course of argument for a defense against a claim, rather than a codified element in civil law. It CAN BE, though.

Note the bizarre case of the Submarine Patent (new window): "In the United States, patent applications filed before November 2000 were not published and remained secret until they were granted. Analogous to a submarine, therefore, submarine patents could stay "under water" for long periods until they "emerged" and surprised the relevant market."

LOL. It's freakishly like some kind of quirky card game. You play for 45 min then one player says "Well I got the Submarine Patent card for that back in the second hand... you never could have won, and all this has been me waiting for the moment to drop that bomb, I win!" and everyone else goes "this game sucks!"
 
2012-02-08 01:40:26 PM  

MythDragon: I totaly submitted this article first, AND with a better headline. I am going to sue subby.
I am seeking 23 Kajillion dollars. But if you wish to settle out of court, I will except one (1) TotalFark sponsership.


Err, I can't afford $5 / month!
 
2012-02-08 01:53:14 PM  
I was actually working on a case a few months back where some fly-by-night company claimed to have invented Voice-Over-IP back in the early 90s, which at this stage of the game is like claiming you've invented fire. Still didn't stop the defendant (a major telecom company) from having to hire 80 lawyers to review hundreds of thousands of documents for two months.

I can't wait until someone sues 4chan or it gets investigated by the DOJ or something. That would be the greatest or worst doc review job ever, depending on your point of view.
 
2012-02-08 01:53:44 PM  
Gopher predates his patent claim. If he is specifically only talking about interactive graphics within a browser window then Mosaic predates him by a lot.

Violawww and Arena also predate his claim.
 
2012-02-08 02:07:09 PM  

mantidor: sure haven't: [2.bp.blogspot.com image 640x426]

/oblig
//hot

holy crap, until now I hadn't noticed the maximum trolling meme had a map of the UK on it.


I see it now too.
 
2012-02-08 02:07:48 PM  
so he suied Google and youtube?
 
2012-02-08 02:11:34 PM  

cannotsuggestaname: Gopher predates his patent claim. If he is specifically only talking about interactive graphics within a browser window then Mosaic predates him by a lot.

Violawww and Arena also predate his claim.


I can think of at least 5 things that would predate this claim, even the phrasing of the protocols involved. The issue is that they picked the best spot to file this claim where prior art will mean less than "Playboy paid us because our patent was valid"

I wish we could patent products only and not just vague ideas.
 
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