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(Fark)   If at the age of 15, you knew what you know now, how do you think things would have turned out?   (fark.com) divider line 388
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5543 clicks; posted to Main » on 08 Feb 2012 at 2:36 AM (2 years ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2012-02-08 02:59:11 AM
At* real school* and it's*
 
2012-02-08 03:01:20 AM
i would have taken the chance i had with the 21 year old woman who was living with my mom.
i would have then given April what she wanted and eventually would have married her.
Whatever happened after that would not have mattered much. She was all i wanted for 25 years of my life.
 
2012-02-08 03:01:33 AM

The One True TheDavid: Never surrender. Sui generic or suicide.


Did you mean "sui generis" or is that some ironic joke that I'm not getting?
 
2012-02-08 03:02:01 AM
Sold a young Drew Curtis on creating an online Stanford Prison experiment where anonymous wardens inflict punishment at will on prisoners who pay $5 per month.
 
2012-02-08 03:03:19 AM
I'd have sought therapy.

And I'd have refused to date the dipshiat who raped me.

But I'd still have been happy to hear my mother wanted us to move to CA. Still the best thing ever for me.
 
2012-02-08 03:04:19 AM
Way too many things.
 
Skr
2012-02-08 03:04:22 AM
I'd probably be more depressed because I wouldn't be able to recreate the good things that happened in my first run (and blindly missing any second chances in the process.)

Also going through another lifetime's worth of failures would be crushing in of itself.
 
2012-02-08 03:05:50 AM
Link (new window)
 
2012-02-08 03:06:17 AM

JayGrrl: Stayed in home until my AA then start school.


if you had stayed at home, you might not even have become an alkie at all though, right?
 
2012-02-08 03:06:23 AM
I would have tracked down the guy (a former close friend) that ended up sleeping with my now-ex-wife while I was deployed.........

And introduced them to each other much much sooner.

/owe him a thank you card
 
2012-02-08 03:07:15 AM
These guys wrote a book The Future of Us (new window) pretty much based on that premise.

Couple of teenagers get an AOL install about 1995 and it somehow logs on to girl's Facebook page 15 years in future, so she can read postings, see what has happened to her friends etc

How wise would you be if you were somehow reading your current Facebook (or Fark) postings when you were 15 ....?
 
2012-02-08 03:11:06 AM
who cares about everything, the journey is half the fun.

i would only want to remember 3 things.

1: google
2: macintosh/apple
3: dont marry that cheating whore....

/not bitter at all why do you ask.....
 
2012-02-08 03:11:09 AM
I would have kept my cool and said, I love you and I don't want you to go...

And I would have gotten a vasectomy the moment I could give legal consent to elective surgery and never told anyone.
 
2012-02-08 03:12:43 AM
I would have murdered Mohammed Atta when he came up to Maine on 9/10/01

Besides that nothing would be different with me
 
2012-02-08 03:15:57 AM
I would have porked that girl Gwendolyn (god, what big boobs!), and she would have gotten knocked up. I would be 16 with a kid and we would all live at my parents' house. I would finish High School, but she would freak out and run off with this one guy she met at that one arcade and he's really cool, and shutup because he loves me and you're just a high school kid and he goes to Junior College, I can't believe you!!!! and Arrghhh!

Good thing she went to Canada with him, 'cuz I'm not sure I could survive prison for manslaughter. She never contacted me again, and I only heard from her parents once, and they didn't know anything about where she was. Probably for the best.

But I finish high school, and with my parents' help to raise Katherine Elizabeth. She was a normal kid, and now she's a normal 21-year old She wants to play music for a living... when she doesn't want to save Polar Bears or make free-range artisinal bread (I don't even know what that means). She's dating a guy named Berndt. It'll be ok.
 
2012-02-08 03:16:35 AM
I would never have gotten all these Mr. Cool Ice tattoos.
 
2012-02-08 03:19:28 AM
It is a waste of life to ponder 'shoulda, woulda, coulda's.'
 
2012-02-08 03:19:28 AM
Only slightly different. Best friend would have come out sooner because I wouldn't have been as much of a standard homophobic teenager, and I wouldn't have ruined three-fourths of the female friendships I had out of the stupid desperation to get a girlfriend
 
2012-02-08 03:19:41 AM

cman: I would have murdered Mohammed Atta when he came up to Maine on 9/10/01

Besides that nothing would be different with me


Congratulations! Now the shadow government has to allow an even greater atrocity to occur in order to push through the power grabs it originally obtained after allowing 9/11. Even more people are killed and war was declared in 3 countries, not 2. Would you like to try again?
 
2012-02-08 03:19:57 AM
I would have died from a drug overdose years ago.

Or I would be one rich farker.

/microsoft and intel stock for the win
 
2012-02-08 03:20:47 AM
I would have had SO much more sex... why was I so picky? What was I thinking?!
 
2012-02-08 03:22:20 AM
I would have dominated the intellectual scene at school, plus made a killing in the stock market...
 
2012-02-08 03:23:14 AM
I wouldn't have lost my virginity until at least 18. I think it would make me a pedophile or something to have sex with 16 year old, but the mentality of a 39 year old. At least it would be (even more) uncomfortable.

Oh, yeah, and I'd be the leader of the free world by now. Except it wouldn't be free. I'd be a despotic tyrant.

And the smoking thing wouldn't have started. Quitting sucked real bad and I don't wanna go through that again.
 
2012-02-08 03:26:45 AM

huskerdu: It is a waste of life to ponder 'shoulda, woulda, coulda's.'


If you don't learn from your mistakes, you're pretty much doomed to repeat them. Or even keep making stupider ones.
 
2012-02-08 03:28:58 AM

nekom: I'd be a billionaire, but probably dead from a cocaine overdose.


billion? hahaha
think trillions ....
you could have got into every retard internet stock early and cheap, gotten out before the crash.
sold so much of that crap short ....
bhwhahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaa


yes, if I knew what I knew now when I was 15, I would have in excess of 100 billion dollars and own a couple islands and a shiat ton of security.
 
2012-02-08 03:30:33 AM

Aquapope: I would have porked that girl Gwendolyn (god, what big boobs!), and she would have gotten knocked up. I would be 16 with a kid and we would all live at my parents' house. I would finish High School, but she would freak out and run off with this one guy she met at that one arcade and he's really cool, and shutup because he loves me and you're just a high school kid and he goes to Junior College, I can't believe you!!!! and Arrghhh!

Good thing she went to Canada with him, 'cuz I'm not sure I could survive prison for manslaughter. She never contacted me again, and I only heard from her parents once, and they didn't know anything about where she was. Probably for the best.

But I finish high school, and with my parents' help to raise Katherine Elizabeth. She was a normal kid, and now she's a normal 21-year old She wants to play music for a living... when she doesn't want to save Polar Bears or make free-range artisinal bread (I don't even know what that means). She's dating a guy named Berndt. It'll be ok.


ok
you win
close the thread
 
2012-02-08 03:34:04 AM
Create a Geocities site/Usenet posting that would predict, in detail, the events of Sept. 11 -- created early enough that I couldn't possibly have anything to do with it. Still be brought in for questioning, but let go. Use my supposed psychic ability to make millions; parlay that into billions through stock market foreknowledge for as long as I can until my own actions alter the timeline. Then, finally, I might actually have a chance to have sex.
 
2012-02-08 03:34:29 AM

ladyfortuna: I would have dominated the intellectual scene at school, plus made a killing in the stock market...


I have to add to this. While I certainly had some boneheaded incidents on the romantic front, I don't think I'd change anything - except maybe how I dealt with the fallout. Learning to drink and build a tolerance was the first mistake, since I don't ever see myself being in a situation where my higher than average tolerance to booze will save me. Also I wish I'd learned not to drunkenly post earlier; almost lost a good friend over stupid shiat said online many years ago.

At any rate, stupid shiat done in the quest for love/lust = learning experience. Learning to handle said experiences would have gone a lot better with some kind of controls in place.

Hope that makes a few younger Farkers pause and think for a second.
 
2012-02-08 03:36:36 AM
i guess i would have made use of information about the stock market to become rich, and the experience to sleep with most any girl i was interested in. which is i guess what we're all still doing anyway in life, maximize our money + (or is it times) pussy, but i still have to think there is something more to this whole game. my answer betrays my lack of wisdom though.
 
2012-02-08 03:41:08 AM

InOmnibusCaritas: I certainly wouldn't have gotten so into Third Eye Blind!


I wouldn't have gotten so into blinding my third eye.
 
2012-02-08 03:42:09 AM
I would have had sex with Roxy McKinley
 
2012-02-08 03:44:38 AM
Instead of buying the Apple computer, I would have bought Apple stock instead.

Also would have sought help for anxiety and depression sooner.
 
2012-02-08 03:45:18 AM
I would have never started smoking weed at age 15, or started swiping my mom's codeine. Kids, please listen. Stay away from drugs and alcohol!!!!! Things have worked out fine, but they would have worked out much better if I had avoided drug use during my formative years.
 
2012-02-08 03:46:22 AM
Better in all aspects of life. Hindsight is 20/20. I guess foresight is even better.

/Forewarned is forearmed. Advance warning provides an advantage.
 
2012-02-08 03:49:04 AM
-I would have learned more foreign languages
-Learned about finance and how to invest in the stock market
-Would have traveled the world to exotic places I only read about now and can't go because I'm too poor
-Not marry my exhusband but had the kid anyway
-Told myself to stay in college the first time around and finish no matter what
-Been nicer to my parents (what teen is?)
-Teenage Angst is BS. Live live how I want to not by someone else's norms
 
2012-02-08 03:49:39 AM

OgreMagi: I would have died from a drug overdose years ago.

Or I would be one rich farker.

/microsoft and intel stock for the win


Almost word for word, this was my initial thought.
 
2012-02-08 03:50:56 AM
Copyright, patent, repeat, profit.
 
2012-02-08 03:56:20 AM
My friend's daughter would have been my daughter too.
That's the only mistake I really want back.
 
2012-02-08 03:58:56 AM
You hear people all the time say, "no regrets! I've never done anything I regretted." I call bullshiat. If you've never done anything you now regret, then you never ever took a chance. And that means you've led one boring farking life.
 
2012-02-08 04:03:40 AM
I like to think I'd do things a lot smarter, but now this depends on whether I'm a 15 yr old kid now in 2012 or in 1986.

See, the context changes profoundly. All these superpowers of hindsight of external developments are not relevant if we're talking a 15 yr old self in 2012. You could just as easily be a farkup from 15-on-out from 2012 as you are from whatever age you are now and on out.

If I had to start over as 15 in 1986, I'd like to think I was gonna be pretty damn ingenious, but I'd not only be crippled by lack of internets, Wikipedia, fun CNC equipment, and all these 16K computers, I'm not sure how much I'd have to work with. And I'd be bored as hell. Libraries died for a reason. I can't go back to spending all afternoon researching a topic in a card catalog and ending up with these results which are either a uselessly trite treatment of the subject, wildly inaccurate, or alternately so technical they never get around to saying anything useful to me.

Of course I could go on to list the REAL mistakes I was making at 15... but it's a far longer story than anyone wants to hear.

Awhile back my mom said when I was really young I'd gone to some kind of psych eval and they said I was "almost" autistic, maybe they used the term Asperger's back then, I don't know. I've come to realize that this term is simply not applicable when you're growing up in an environment where neither parent expresses any actual "love" for a kid, prefer to be uninvolved, and tended to show arrogant, dickish hostility towards teachers and such. I'm not sure what I could possibly communicate to my 15-yr-old self there. I didn't need ADVICE, I needed a real parent, a role model, anybody who would have worked through my dickish tendencies that my parents impressed upon me from as far back as I can remember to go. I suppose a useful thing to do would be to tell off my parents in no uncertain terms, in front of myself. I don't care if this hypothetical scenario says this effect on them is against the rules and immediately retcons out and never happened, it would be about telling me, not them.
 
2012-02-08 04:04:48 AM
I would have had more scars and a couple of nice memories.

Oh, wait, everything I know now? Like my education after age 15? I'd probably be living off the interest of a fund or three. Also, I would have bought a lot of stock in Apple ca 1997.
 
2012-02-08 04:05:36 AM
MIA...

I want to have sex with your mustang.

I had a 66 blue-grey soft-top with all leather interior - and intact dashboard - bought a custom radio to go in the weirdly spaced radio hole so I wouldn't have to butcher it.

Some asshole fell asleep and rear-ended me at 55. I'd only had her 6 months. Totalled her. I was a junior in hs. I had to drive a 78 volare station wagon after that. Murder Murder Murder.

CSB sucks.
 
2012-02-08 04:08:06 AM

antiFodder: You hear people all the time say, "no regrets! I've never done anything I regretted." I call bullshiat. If you've never done anything you now regret, then you never ever took a chance. And that means you've led one boring farking life.


Isn't the point of regret that you'd rather have not done the things, and had the boring life instead?
 
2012-02-08 04:15:29 AM
So if I woke up at 15 with my knowledge now... (baring lottery numbers and stock investments, yes obviously we'd all do that.)

But just waking up and knowing what's in front of you...

Probably would've had the 1000 yd stare knowing how damn hard the next 15yrs would be.

Work your ass off in school and sports. Graduate, finally manage to land a good job for good pay and get married, officially, to my high school sweetheart...only to watch the economy implode and have both of us lose our jobs. Spend the next couple years working your ass off just to try to keep food on the table while listening to jackass GOP members gripe on how we "just don't have enough skin in the game", or "jobs are out there if you're willing to work hard." and other crap that can only come from someone who's been born with "silver spoon in hand".

/what we've done is probably the best road we could've ever taken, given the circumstances...
//grateful.
 
2012-02-08 04:18:27 AM
too late
 
2012-02-08 04:24:13 AM
I probably would have stuck with my interest in science - geology in particular, rather than switching to the humanities. Would probably have made more money working for a mining company than being a librarian.
 
2012-02-08 04:30:09 AM
hindsight is fun ain't it?
 
2012-02-08 04:30:14 AM
Would I have to know about all the bad things that I'd be unable to prevent? That would probably drive a person mad.
 
2012-02-08 04:34:00 AM
15? I guess I would've saved Eric from getting killed the following year.

Cause that kinda sucked.
 
2012-02-08 04:37:50 AM
But you and I, we've been through that
And this is not our fate
So let us not talk falsely now
The hour is getting late
 
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