It's Not News It's Fark.com
Real news. Real funny
Log In
|
Sign Up »
Login
Password
Forgot password?
X
Fark
TotalFark
my
Fark
About/FArQ
Contests
Store
Contact Us
Mobile
Search:
Password
Login
Turn on javascript (or enable it for Fark) for a better user experience.
If you can read this, either the style sheet didn't load or you have an older browser that doesn't support style sheets. Try clearing your browser cache and refreshing the page.
Main
Sports
Business
Geek
Entertainment
Politics
Video
Employees taking stacks of cash from a bank vault for an auditor to count, forget to remove the ones with the exploding dye packs
(
denver.cbslocal.com
)
50
More:
Dumbass
,
dye pack
• • •
8694
clicks; posted to
Main »
on
02 Feb 2012
at
10:20 AM
|
Favorite
| share:
more»
|
shirt it!
Share this link:
URL:
http://fk.cm/go/6917464
Bookmark:
URL:
http://fk.cm/6917464
Bookmark:
Article
Comments
close
50 Comments
(
+0 »
)
Paginated (50/page)
Single page
Single page, reversed
Normal view
Change images to links
Show raw HTML
Show posts from ignored users
View Voting Results:
Smartest
and
Funniest
gopher321
2012-02-02 08:54:30 AM
You forgot "HILARITY ENSUES". Bad subby.
Petit_Merdeux
2012-02-02 08:56:57 AM
Wouldn't it be good if they forgot to remove the ones with exploding dye packs?
Sybarite
2012-02-02 09:07:36 AM
Feel their pain.
cgraves67
2012-02-02 10:24:02 AM
maybe they didn't like the auditor.
bikerbob59
2012-02-02 10:25:41 AM
cgraves67
:
maybe they didn't like the auditor.
Who the hell likes auditors to begin with?
Mugato
2012-02-02 10:26:33 AM
Do any people besides complete retards even try to rob banks anymore? All I really know about bank robbery was from the Pacino/DeNiro documentary Heat but nowadays with all the cameras everywhere, various means of contacting the cops besides the alarms, the dye packs in this article and the fact that unless you can get into the vault, the tellers don't really have much more money than a couple liquor stores and they don't carry the stretch in the Federal PMITA prison, it just seems like a futile venture is all.
SweetSilverBlues
2012-02-02 10:27:25 AM
The mental images inspired by the headline made me giggle in delight.
Thank you, subby!
uttertosh
2012-02-02 10:31:37 AM
Wow, that was the most interesting, informative piece of journalism i've seen in ages
Friskya
2012-02-02 10:31:51 AM
Best In The World
:
"All these child stars grow up and they're knockin' over banks and getting prostitutes. I'm, like, one of the only people I know that has managed to dodge all of that negative crap." - Dustin Diamond
Put on ur hardhatz cuz I'm about 2 drop some knowledge: Never use banks. Banks rob, rape, pillage, extracetera. My boy Mabel j is always like "OMG my account just got hit with 35 $35 ova draft fees. Do U kno how much money dat iz?" And I'm like "I ain't got an abacus, playa, but it sure sounds like UR f'd." And he's like "sho,nuff" & I'm like "that's tha beat."
What U should do is just use a check cashing place if U don't get paid in str8 cash money, homie. When U do that U won't make no overdrafting mistakes because how's a baller gonna overdraft his wallet? Thurrrs either money or moths inside yo pocket. Rich ppl aren't stupid, Y do U think they got fire-proof safes? Cuz they don't trust no banks THEY RUN the banks & keep thurrr safes under the temple.
& like Screech spits, if yo money in tha bank than Sabrina The Teenage Witch & the cast of The OC is gonna be gunnin for it like they was the Symbionese Liberation Army.
If U wanta bank, go to tha damn river, bro.
I think this is the first time I've ever seen a post on Fark written entirely in "thug".
Is there an online dictionary for that, or is it your first language?
BurnShrike
2012-02-02 10:33:23 AM
Friskya
:
Best In The World: "All these child stars grow up and they're knockin' over banks and getting prostitutes. I'm, like, one of the only people I know that has managed to dodge all of that negative crap." - Dustin Diamond
Put on ur hardhatz cuz I'm about 2 drop some knowledge: Never use banks. Banks rob, rape, pillage, extracetera. My boy Mabel j is always like "OMG my account just got hit with 35 $35 ova draft fees. Do U kno how much money dat iz?" And I'm like "I ain't got an abacus, playa, but it sure sounds like UR f'd." And he's like "sho,nuff" & I'm like "that's tha beat."
What U should do is just use a check cashing place if U don't get paid in str8 cash money, homie. When U do that U won't make no overdrafting mistakes because how's a baller gonna overdraft his wallet? Thurrrs either money or moths inside yo pocket. Rich ppl aren't stupid, Y do U think they got fire-proof safes? Cuz they don't trust no banks THEY RUN the banks & keep thurrr safes under the temple.
& like Screech spits, if yo money in tha bank than Sabrina The Teenage Witch & the cast of The OC is gonna be gunnin for it like they was the Symbionese Liberation Army.
If U wanta bank, go to tha damn river, bro.
I think this is the first time I've ever seen a post on Fark written entirely in "thug".
Is there an online dictionary for that, or is it your first language?
I stopped reading right after the Screech quote. If you can't communicate properly, I suspect you don't have much useful to say anyway.
InfrasonicTom
2012-02-02 10:35:04 AM
it was just an auditor. they had it coming for one reason or another.
Mr.Hawk
2012-02-02 10:36:26 AM
mekkab
2012-02-02 10:37:29 AM
Friskya
:
Is there an online dictionary for that, or is it your first language?
you must be new, here.
/this is his schtick
chookbillion
2012-02-02 10:44:23 AM
uttertosh
:
Wow, that was the most interesting, informative piece of journalism i've seen in ages
Yeah, right? I kept looking for the rest of it, but I only found all the ads.
FeFiFoFark
2012-02-02 10:45:57 AM
wow. so what.
Maud Dib
2012-02-02 10:46:49 AM
Friskya
:
I think this is the first time I've ever seen a post on Fark written entirely in "thug".
Is there an online dictionary for that, or is it your first language?
He's had too many concussions.
One day, he will look back on his career with greebert.
Link
(new window)
Whiskey Dickens
2012-02-02 10:52:10 AM
Friskya
:
I think this is the first time I've ever seen a post on Fark written entirely in "thug".
Is there an online dictionary for that, or is it your first language?
*Checks profile*
1) Peanuts comic
2) Rasist screed
3) Whining about political correctness.
Confirmed for butthurt old man.
Sass-O-Rev
2012-02-02 10:55:05 AM
Best In The World
:
"All these child stars grow up and they're knockin' over banks and getting prostitutes. I'm, like, one of the only people I know that has managed to dodge all of that negative crap." - Dustin Diamond
Put on ur hardhatz cuz I'm about 2 drop some knowledge: Never use banks. Banks rob, rape, pillage, extracetera. My boy Mabel j is always like "OMG my account just got hit with 35 $35 ova draft fees. Do U kno how much money dat iz?" And I'm like "I ain't got an abacus, playa, but it sure sounds like UR f'd." And he's like "sho,nuff" & I'm like "that's tha beat."
What U should do is just use a check cashing place if U don't get paid in str8 cash money, homie. When U do that U won't make no overdrafting mistakes because how's a baller gonna overdraft his wallet? Thurrrs either money or moths inside yo pocket. Rich ppl aren't stupid, Y do U think they got fire-proof safes? Cuz they don't trust no banks THEY RUN the banks & keep thurrr safes under the temple.
& like Screech spits, if yo money in tha bank than Sabrina The Teenage Witch & the cast of The OC is gonna be gunnin for it like they was the Symbionese Liberation Army.
If U wanta bank, go to tha damn river, bro.
I was wondering what Meow Said the Dog was up to lately!
meanmutton
2012-02-02 10:55:46 AM
Mugato
:
Do any people besides complete retards even try to rob banks anymore? All I really know about bank robbery was from the Pacino/DeNiro documentary Heat but nowadays with all the cameras everywhere, various means of contacting the cops besides the alarms, the dye packs in this article and the fact that unless you can get into the vault, the tellers don't really have much more money than a couple liquor stores and they don't carry the stretch in the Federal PMITA prison, it just seems like a futile venture is all.
My niece's father is a bank manager. He had a guy try to rob him at knifepoint once. Ended up getting chased down the street. The guy got away with like $20k in cash... lasted him for like 2 hours before the police got him. So many felonies...
Yeah, it's just a really, really bad idea.
Bhruic
2012-02-02 10:58:16 AM
Mugato
:
Do any people besides complete retards even try to rob banks anymore? All I really know about bank robbery was from the Pacino/DeNiro documentary Heat but nowadays with all the cameras everywhere, various means of contacting the cops besides the alarms, the dye packs in this article and the fact that unless you can get into the vault, the tellers don't really have much more money than a couple liquor stores and they don't carry the stretch in the Federal PMITA prison, it just seems like a futile venture is all.
Strangely, yes. And even stranger, they still seem to get away with it - just not with any "major scores". It's mostly just the robbing-the-teller variety.
HairyTwatter
2012-02-02 11:01:44 AM
Friskya
:
Best In The World: "All these child stars grow up and they're knockin' over banks and getting prostitutes. I'm, like, one of the only people I know that has managed to dodge all of that negative crap." - Dustin Diamond
Put on ur hardhatz cuz I'm about 2 drop some knowledge: Never use banks. Banks rob, rape, pillage, extracetera. My boy Mabel j is always like "OMG my account just got hit with 35 $35 ova draft fees. Do U kno how much money dat iz?" And I'm like "I ain't got an abacus, playa, but it sure sounds like UR f'd." And he's like "sho,nuff" & I'm like "that's tha beat."
What U should do is just use a check cashing place if U don't get paid in str8 cash money, homie. When U do that U won't make no overdrafting mistakes because how's a baller gonna overdraft his wallet? Thurrrs either money or moths inside yo pocket. Rich ppl aren't stupid, Y do U think they got fire-proof safes? Cuz they don't trust no banks THEY RUN the banks & keep thurrr safes under the temple.
& like Screech spits, if yo money in tha bank than Sabrina The Teenage Witch & the cast of The OC is gonna be gunnin for it like they was the Symbionese Liberation Army.
If U wanta bank, go to tha damn river, bro.
I think this is the first time I've ever seen a post on Fark written entirely in "thug".
Is there an online dictionary for that, or is it your first language?
This person was my fastest block evar. Next was the idiot who turns every article into a limerick.
BurnShrike
2012-02-02 11:03:00 AM
HairyTwatter
:
This person was my fastest block evar. Next was the idiot who turns every article into a limerick.
Aw, but limericking is fun! And I was on a roll :(
Tsar_Bomba1
2012-02-02 11:04:09 AM
Best In The World
:
Put on ur hardhatz cuz I'm about 2 drop some knowledge...
MBooda
2012-02-02 11:11:28 AM
My Money!
mccallcl
2012-02-02 11:11:55 AM
Mugato
:
Do any people besides complete retards even try to rob banks anymore? All I really know about bank robbery was from the Pacino/DeNiro documentary Heat but nowadays with all the cameras everywhere, various means of contacting the cops besides the alarms, the dye packs in this article and the fact that unless you can get into the vault, the tellers don't really have much more money than a couple liquor stores and they don't carry the stretch in the Federal PMITA prison, it just seems like a futile venture is all.
Lots and lots of banks get robbed and lots of people get away with it. You don't hear about it for obvious reasons, but think: if someone manages to get the money out of the building, what are the chances they get caught? Some number less than 100%.
The dye packs are also signs that banks are desperate enough to risk hurting their employees just to keep the money from being stolen. If robbers got caught every time, what would the dye packs be for?
Bad_ad85
2012-02-02 11:12:49 AM
Tsar_Bomba1
:
Best In The World:
Put on ur hardhatz cuz I'm about 2 drop some knowledge...
Shake before open?
DVDave
2012-02-02 11:19:44 AM
BurnShrike
:
Friskya: Best In The World: "All these child stars grow up and they're knockin' over banks and getting prostitutes. I'm, like, one of the only people I know that has managed to dodge all of that negative crap." - Dustin Diamond
Put on ur hardhatz cuz I'm about 2 drop some knowledge: Never use banks. Banks rob, rape, pillage, extracetera. My boy Mabel j is always like "OMG my account just got hit with 35 $35 ova draft fees. Do U kno how much money dat iz?" And I'm like "I ain't got an abacus, playa, but it sure sounds like UR f'd." And he's like "sho,nuff" & I'm like "that's tha beat."
What U should do is just use a check cashing place if U don't get paid in str8 cash money, homie. When U do that U won't make no overdrafting mistakes because how's a baller gonna overdraft his wallet? Thurrrs either money or moths inside yo pocket. Rich ppl aren't stupid, Y do U think they got fire-proof safes? Cuz they don't trust no banks THEY RUN the banks & keep thurrr safes under the temple.
& like Screech spits, if yo money in tha bank than Sabrina The Teenage Witch & the cast of The OC is gonna be gunnin for it like they was the Symbionese Liberation Army.
If U wanta bank, go to tha damn river, bro.
I think this is the first time I've ever seen a post on Fark written entirely in "thug".
Is there an online dictionary for that, or is it your first language?
I stopped reading right after the Screech quote. If you can't communicate properly, I suspect you don't have much useful to say anyway.
I usually stop reading right after "Best In The World"
i haven't figured this guy out yet - is he a talented troll or is he really just that stupid?
meanmutton
2012-02-02 11:28:03 AM
HairyTwatter
:
Friskya: Best In The World: "All these child stars grow up and they're knockin' over banks and getting prostitutes. I'm, like, one of the only people I know that has managed to dodge all of that negative crap." - Dustin Diamond
Put on ur hardhatz cuz I'm about 2 drop some knowledge: Never use banks. Banks rob, rape, pillage, extracetera. My boy Mabel j is always like "OMG my account just got hit with 35 $35 ova draft fees. Do U kno how much money dat iz?" And I'm like "I ain't got an abacus, playa, but it sure sounds like UR f'd." And he's like "sho,nuff" & I'm like "that's tha beat."
What U should do is just use a check cashing place if U don't get paid in str8 cash money, homie. When U do that U won't make no overdrafting mistakes because how's a baller gonna overdraft his wallet? Thurrrs either money or moths inside yo pocket. Rich ppl aren't stupid, Y do U think they got fire-proof safes? Cuz they don't trust no banks THEY RUN the banks & keep thurrr safes under the temple.
& like Screech spits, if yo money in tha bank than Sabrina The Teenage Witch & the cast of The OC is gonna be gunnin for it like they was the Symbionese Liberation Army.
If U wanta bank, go to tha damn river, bro.
I think this is the first time I've ever seen a post on Fark written entirely in "thug".
Is there an online dictionary for that, or is it your first language?
This person was my fastest block evar. Next was the idiot who turns every article into a limerick.
You aren't supposed to talk about who is on your block list.
Kar98
2012-02-02 11:29:28 AM
Yoops?
ows
2012-02-02 11:38:04 AM
you seen the movie "drag me to hell" where she spews blood all over the bank manager. too funny.
YixilTesiphon
2012-02-02 11:39:46 AM
But were bros droppin' plates?
dbrikhs
2012-02-02 11:47:56 AM
Best In The World
:
"All these child stars grow up and they're knockin' over banks and getting prostitutes. I'm, like, one of the only people I know that has managed to dodge all of that negative crap." - Dustin Diamond
Put on ur hardhatz cuz I'm about 2 drop some knowledge: Never use banks. Banks rob, rape, pillage, extracetera. My boy Mabel j is always like "OMG my account just got hit with 35 $35 ova draft fees. Do U kno how much money dat iz?" And I'm like "I ain't got an abacus, playa, but it sure sounds like UR f'd." And he's like "sho,nuff" & I'm like "that's tha beat."
What U should do is just use a check cashing place if U don't get paid in str8 cash money, homie. When U do that U won't make no overdrafting mistakes because how's a baller gonna overdraft his wallet? Thurrrs either money or moths inside yo pocket. Rich ppl aren't stupid, Y do U think they got fire-proof safes? Cuz they don't trust no banks THEY RUN the banks & keep thurrr safes under the temple.
& like Screech spits, if yo money in tha bank than Sabrina The Teenage Witch & the cast of The OC is gonna be gunnin for it like they was the Symbionese Liberation Army.
If U wanta bank, go to tha damn river, bro.
Say What!?
Was this supposed to be relevant to TFA?
Damn troll
bentheguard
2012-02-02 12:00:21 PM
If only there were some way to wash the currency, maybe have the bills cleaned.....
Friskya
2012-02-02 12:01:09 PM
Whiskey Dickens
:
*Checks profile*
1) Peanuts comic
2) Rasist screed
3) Whining about political correctness.
Confirmed for butthurt old man.
You forgot the clarification I put there, specifically for individuals such as yourself.
b3x
2012-02-02 12:05:17 PM
did not read the article , but something did catch my eye
http://denver.cbslocal.com/personality/lauren-whitney/
All cities should be graded by their weather girls, Denver I award you a B+.
Marley'sGirl
2012-02-02 12:34:31 PM
InfrasonicTom
:
it was just an auditor. they had it coming for one reason or another.
Yep.
tetsoushima
2012-02-02 12:42:52 PM
Bonus: they mention the "Kill-Dozer" below the article.
meanmutton
2012-02-02 12:45:29 PM
bentheguard
:
If only there were some way to wash the currency, maybe have the bills cleaned.....
Jokes about money laundering aside, I'm willing to bet that they can just exchange it for new bills.
Blackbird
2012-02-02 12:54:54 PM
As someone who deals with auditors. That's just providing proof for security measures.
Most of our questions from auditors starts with "Can you provide proof for..."
Kit Fister
2012-02-02 12:59:09 PM
you assume they *forgot* to remove them...
pisceandreamer
2012-02-02 01:01:02 PM
mccallcl
:
The dye packs are also signs that banks are desperate enough to risk hurting their employees just to keep the money from being stolen. If robbers got caught every time, what would the dye packs be for?
Dye packs have been around for years and years - hardly new. Occasionally, one goes off in a branch. I worked in admin for a bank in college, and one day after closing when they were doing the counts, one of the employees took the bait clip out and didn't get it back in the tray quickly enough and *POOF* - large mess, some watering eyes and the firehouse had to bring over a couple fans to help air the place out.
Nothing like getting the call from the manager, "Um, we've got a small problem here..."
/csb
ObscureNameHere
2012-02-02 01:14:17 PM
Silly auditors! You open the money bags with dye packs in a bathtub full of water.
/I've said too much
snocone
2012-02-02 01:14:52 PM
A bank with actual money in a vault?
Oh, you mean a Coca Money Scrubbing and Distribution Outlet.
snocone
2012-02-02 01:15:47 PM
ObscureNameHere
:
Silly auditors! You open the money bags with dye packs in a bathtub full of water.
/I've said too much
Hagrid?
HairyTwatter
2012-02-02 01:38:37 PM
meanmutton
:
You aren't supposed to talk about who is on your block list.
Woops. Forgot the first rule of block list. My bad.
PanzerPants
2012-02-02 01:44:54 PM
My first thought was couldnt that system be defeated by simply putting your ill gotten gains into a bag that acts as a faraday cage and that way the sensor in the door would never deliver the radio frequency to the dye pack that would initiate the timer to explode.
Simply make a faraday cage out of a duffel bag, and this would also thwart the similar GPS tracking that 3Si also sells. Problem solved. Anything you leave the bank with that you did not bring in goes out the door in a faraday bag.
Then again I am obviously too smart to be a criminal or too stupid to take advantage of my abilities. I look at every security method and devise ways to circumvent those barriers. I just do it for the good guys.
Oh, Ill be selling my Patent Pending "Bank Bags" soon. put your orders in now.
snocone
2012-02-02 01:57:44 PM
PanzerPants
:
My first thought was couldnt that system be defeated by simply putting your ill gotten gains into a bag that acts as a faraday cage and that way the sensor in the door would never deliver the radio frequency to the dye pack that would initiate the timer to explode.
Simply make a faraday cage out of a duffel bag, and this would also thwart the similar GPS tracking that 3Si also sells. Problem solved. Anything you leave the bank with that you did not bring in goes out the door in a faraday bag.
Then again I am obviously too smart to be a criminal or too stupid to take advantage of my abilities. I look at every security method and devise ways to circumvent those barriers. I just do it for the good guys.
Oh, Ill be selling my Patent Pending "Bank Bags" soon. put your orders in now.
Smarter guy sez, packs go off when signal is blocked.
PanzerPants
2012-02-02 02:33:05 PM
Smarter guy sez, packs go off when signal is blocked.
That would work in theory, yes, but the current generation of the packs (which are the thin flexible ones) by 3Si are made to "detonate" once they receive the specific RF from the module hidden in the door frames of all exits.
The packs are sitting in an inactive state in the teller's drawers next to a magnet. Once they are removed from the magnetic field they become active. Then they receive the "GO" signal once they pass by the door module, and then the timer is activated and Splat-Boom-Fizzle-Poof-Burn Goes the Dynamite. The current technology only allows for the device to get a "GO" command, and thats all she gets.
It would only make sense to invest in that R&D to make the product less circumventable if bank robbers were smart enough to try and circumvent them with more than a warning to the teller "not to put a dye pack in or Ill come back and kill ya" or trying to feel for the old rigid style. Now they use a flexible format that is more difficult to tactilely determine the "splat pack".
Chevello
2012-02-02 07:35:18 PM
snocone
:
PanzerPants: My first thought was couldnt that system be defeated by simply putting your ill gotten gains into a bag that acts as a faraday cage and that way the sensor in the door would never deliver the radio frequency to the dye pack that would initiate the timer to explode.
Simply make a faraday cage out of a duffel bag, and this would also thwart the similar GPS tracking that 3Si also sells. Problem solved. Anything you leave the bank with that you did not bring in goes out the door in a faraday bag.
Then again I am obviously too smart to be a criminal or too stupid to take advantage of my abilities. I look at every security method and devise ways to circumvent those barriers. I just do it for the good guys.
Oh, Ill be selling my Patent Pending "Bank Bags" soon. put your orders in now.
Smarter guy sez, packs go off when signal is blocked.
In that case even smarter guy starts a business cleaning up banks after power outages
sethstorm
2012-02-03 12:45:10 AM
meanmutton
:
You aren't supposed to talk about who is on your block list.
Not so sure about that. BITW is on mine, since all I see are replies. So is the limerick guy. A few intentional gibberish speakers are there as well.
Thanks to the recent site changes, blocking people is much faster.
Displayed
50
of
50
comments
View Voting Results:
Smartest
and
Funniest
Redisplay/refresh comments
This thread is closed to new comments.
Submit a Link »
Like Fark!
+1 Fark!
Follow @fark on Twitter
Fark via RSS
Top Links
Top Comments
Top Submitters
Press/Publicity
Headlines of the Week
All Latest
Fark Forum
Link Voting
Sports Forum
Fark Blogs
Geek Forum
Fark Book
Entertainment Forum
Fark Travel Guide
Politics Forum
Fark Parties
Fark Party Forum
Fark Chat
Photoshop Forum
PS/Photo Browser
Farktography Forum
Fark Quiz
From the
Fark Shop
:
Fark Logo - Decal
Minor Miracle Mug
Bump-N-Go Cybermat
Mixed Messages Mug
More from the
Fark Shop
»
Stories from our partner sites:
5 Movie Roles Will Smith (Probably) N...
Katy Perry Seems Surprisingly Cool Ab...
The GIFs That Keep on Giving
Someone Put This Epic Sportscaster on...
More news at Scribol »
Hiya Hot Stuff
Start Spreadin' The Repos
Licked At The Seaside
Sad Supermodels
More news at truTV »
Vintage Vegas: Rare Photos of a Deser...
Hell on Wheels: In Praise of Mutant B...
World War II: Pictures We Remember
Behind the Picture: The Liberation of...
More news at Life »
Cops Shoot Naked Guy Eating Man's Fac...
30 North Korean Officials Die in 'Car...
Kids Missing Nearly 4 Years Found in...
Demi, Ashton Caught in Heated Embrace
More news at Newser »