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Kelly Clarkson confirmed to sing the National Anthem at this year's Super Bowl. In long awaited reunion, Justin Guarini will sweep off the stage when Kelly is done
(
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nvmac
2012-02-02 12:56:12 PM
She has a great voice. Hopefully, she won't 'aguillera' it up and sing it straight.
Lumbar Puncture
2012-02-02 12:56:36 PM
There's nothing that screams Super Bowl demographic like Kelly Clarkson singing the Anthem, Madonna at the Half-Time show, and the second season of The Voice showing right after.
Tax Boy
2012-02-02 12:57:08 PM
Kelly Clarkson confirmed sing
Oh say, you see, dawn's early light?
The Bunyip
2012-02-02 12:58:37 PM
Who's high pitch?
gimmegimme
2012-02-02 12:59:22 PM
In before people point out that Kelly Clarkson looks ten years older than she did ten years ago.
/Come on; she's cute and talented and seems relatively pleasant.
Jingle Strangle
2012-02-02 12:59:34 PM
I hope her wardrobe malfunctions.
The Singing Bush
2012-02-02 01:00:03 PM
beefs, heel, drain, etc.
hicksfa2
2012-02-02 01:00:09 PM
Are they paying her in pork rinds?
zvoidx
2012-02-02 01:01:32 PM
"Kelly Clarkson confirmed sing..."
*sigh*
Oh, how I pine for the days of the music tab trolls...
/so be it, my friends...so be it
Rapmaster2000
2012-02-02 01:01:52 PM
Lumbar Puncture
:
There's nothing that screams Super Bowl demographic like Kelly Clarkson singing the Anthem,
Do lesbians watch football?
pwn3d781
2012-02-02 01:06:05 PM
The Singing Bush
:
beefs, heel, drain, etc.
Hey, unlike someone who performed in last year's Superb Owl, at least Kelly has the good sense to take care of her business in the shower, and not on stage.
/came for this, actually
Thelyphthoric
2012-02-02 01:09:44 PM
Rapmaster2000
:
Lumbar Puncture: There's nothing that screams Super Bowl demographic like Kelly Clarkson singing the Anthem,
Do lesbians watch football?
My daughter will be watching the game, so I know at least one does.
Jerk.
barneyfifesbullet
2012-02-02 01:10:47 PM
Tell her to wait until after she sings before she starts woofing down pizzas.
Rapmaster2000
2012-02-02 01:18:40 PM
Thelyphthoric
:
Rapmaster2000: Lumbar Puncture: There's nothing that screams Super Bowl demographic like Kelly Clarkson singing the Anthem,
Do lesbians watch football?
My daughter will be watching the game, so I know at least one does.
Jerk.
I wasn't making a value judgment. All of the lesbians I know don't watch football so I don't understand why Kelly Clarkson is out there.
Mr. Parker
2012-02-02 01:20:01 PM
+1 subby
Thelyphthoric
2012-02-02 01:22:36 PM
Rapmaster2000
:
Thelyphthoric: Rapmaster2000: Lumbar Puncture: There's nothing that screams Super Bowl demographic like Kelly Clarkson singing the Anthem,
Do lesbians watch football?
My daughter will be watching the game, so I know at least one does.
Jerk.
I wasn't making a value judgment. All of the lesbians I know don't watch football so I don't understand why Kelly Clarkson is out there.
I was just being snerky, no worries.
Rickenbacker
2012-02-02 01:42:52 PM
Wow. The NFL really hates people. That is a huge list of suck.
EnviroDude
2012-02-02 01:44:03 PM
Does anybody remember when AI winners were given movie deals?
Does anybody even watch AI anymore?
/wonders how AI would have handled a singer like Bob Dylan or Leon Redbone. Surely, they would have been given no votes.
neritz
2012-02-02 01:48:16 PM
Rapmaster2000
:
Lumbar Puncture: There's nothing that screams Super Bowl demographic like Kelly Clarkson singing the Anthem,
Do lesbians watch football?
Only if they eat out on Sunday.
CarnySaur
2012-02-02 01:57:49 PM
neritz
:
Rapmaster2000: Lumbar Puncture: There's nothing that screams Super Bowl demographic like Kelly Clarkson singing the Anthem,
Do lesbians watch football?
Only if they eat out on Sunday.
I know at least three who do (watch football).
Mildot
2012-02-02 02:10:32 PM
Hope she wears this...
Earpj
2012-02-02 02:26:36 PM
EnviroDude
:
/wonders how AI would have handled a singer like Bob Dylan or Leon Redbone. Surely, they would have been given no votes.
I've often wondered about that. What about Rod Stewart? Or Simon LeBon?
/I hope Kelly practices.
xxdangerbobxx
2012-02-02 02:31:24 PM
Well as long as she's confirmed sing it, I'm sold.
Raug the Dwarf
2012-02-02 02:33:44 PM
I'll say it. I have a crush on Kelly Clarkson. She can sing, she's got a cute face and is a thick gal with some junk in the trunk.
I want to invite her over for a case of beer, fried chicken and a bag of Oreos and see where the night takes us. Call me a chubby chaser, but there you have it. Like the fist of an angry god, I would hit that.
ihatedumbpeople
2012-02-02 02:41:59 PM
yes please.
She always looks cute...I can deal with cute, even if she plumps up every now and then.
author1701
2012-02-02 02:49:57 PM
Thelyphthoric
:
Rapmaster2000: Lumbar Puncture: There's nothing that screams Super Bowl demographic like Kelly Clarkson singing the Anthem,
Do lesbians watch football?
My daughter will be watching the game, so I know at least one does.
Jerk.
*fap*
Meatschool
2012-02-02 02:54:27 PM
Raug the Dwarf
:
I'll say it. I have a crush on Kelly Clarkson. She can sing, she's got a cute face and is a thick gal with some junk in the trunk.
I want to invite her over for a case of beer, fried chicken and a bag of Oreos and see where the night takes us. Call me a chubby chaser, but there you have it. Like the fist of an angry god, I would hit that.
So much farking THAT!
Orgasmatron138
2012-02-02 02:58:34 PM
Makes sense. They already know they have all the sports fans. Now they're trying to maximize viewership by appealing to other demographics.
Six_By_Nine
2012-02-02 03:00:28 PM
Earpj
:
EnviroDude:
/wonders how AI would have handled a singer like Bob Dylan or Leon Redbone. Surely, they would have been given no votes.
I've often wondered about that. What about Rod Stewart? Or Simon LeBon?
/I hope Kelly practices.
Of
course
Dylan and Redbone wouldn't have done well on AI. They don't fit a certain kind of marketing mold (read "safe, but bland enough to fit into a mold that we give them that just so perfectly fits what's selling these days") for a demographic lacking impulse control (read "will spend a lot of money supporting a pop star").
Rod Stewart, though, might have. His voice is very distinctive; you can't really listen to Rod Stewart and mistake him for someone else. The problem with most people's musical tastes has always been distinguishing "different" from "superior" anyway. (Remember how Macy Gray and Norah Jones were lauded for being "so different", kind of how Adele is now?) And AI always takes what's different about any singer, strips him down and makes him bland anyway (sort of like how boy bands are marketed as "safe" bad boys). So, he might have done well, but he would have been farking boring as a result.
(And perhaps it's for the AI's benefit to be controlled that way: Clarkson fell out with her management and made an album not too long ago that was her own creative vision, and it tanked.)
Simon LeBon, well, he might have turned out like the Chris Daughtry of the crowd. A breakout hit despite not getting the votes. Lackluster voice, sure (by AI's standards anyway), but enough "it" factor to sell a respectable number of records without burning out for being too popular.
(For the record, I like Rod Stewart and Duran Duran; Daughtry, however, is like the lackluster version of Nickelback.)
Mr.Poops
2012-02-02 03:01:09 PM
Mildot
:
Hope she wears this...
[4.bp.blogspot.com image 267x400]
Not cute, not hot. She looks like a loaf of spam with a bikini thrown on
Meatschool
2012-02-02 03:08:29 PM
Mr.Poops
:
Mildot: Hope she wears this...
[4.bp.blogspot.com image 267x400]
Not cute, not hot. She looks like a loaf of spam with a bikini thrown on
That's ok. I like Spam... get some eggs fried up with it... yeah buddy, that's good eatin'
indeebud
2012-02-02 03:31:36 PM
nvmac
:
She has a great voice. Hopefully, she won't 'aguillera' it up and sing it straight.
I concur! Nothing I hate worse is when singers muck it up like that.
Bunz
2012-02-02 03:36:04 PM
Raug the Dwarf
:
I'll say it. I have a crush on Kelly Clarkson. She can sing, she's got a cute face and is a thick gal with some junk in the trunk.
I want to invite her over for a case of beer, fried chicken and a bag of Oreos and see where the night takes us. Call me a chubby chaser, but there you have it. Like the fist of an angry god, I would hit that.
For some reason I see her as one of those angry farkers that won't stop until both of your are exhausted.
Or until meal time, whichever is first.
EyeballKid
2012-02-02 04:22:11 PM
Today, we'll watch two teams of individuals who have gritted and endured aversity throughout the season for a chance at a hard-earned prize they've worked hard for decades to dream of achieving. But first, please rise so the winner of a karaoke game show judged by pre-teen girls can sing.
Irving Maimway
2012-02-02 04:33:17 PM
Raug the Dwarf
:
I'll say it. I have a crush on Kelly Clarkson. She can sing, she's got a cute face and is a thick gal with some junk in the trunk.
I want to invite her over for a case of beer, fried chicken and a bag of Oreos and see where the night takes us. Call me a chubby chaser, but there you have it. Like the fist of an angry god, I would hit that.
Yup.
farbiez
2012-02-02 04:45:22 PM
I like Kelly Clarkson. She's a singer and not a model and seems pretty comfortable in her own skin chunky or not. I'm sure she'll do a great job on the anthem as the girl can sing.
pinchpoint
2012-02-02 04:55:58 PM
I would wreck that chick, then knock back a couple of rotisserie chickens and a case of beer with her and wreck it again.
bel4sucks
2012-02-02 06:02:22 PM
EyeballKid
:
Today, we'll watch two teams of individuals who have gritted and endured aversity throughout the season for a chance at a hard-earned prize they've worked hard for decades to dream of achieving. But first, please rise so the winner of a karaoke game show judged by pre-teen girls can sing.
This kid mad.
bingethinker
2012-02-02 06:13:06 PM
After the anthem, she'll suit up for the Patriots and back up Vince Wilfork at nose tackle.
jmr61
2012-02-02 09:47:41 PM
The Bunyip
:
Who's high pitch?
Nice.
limboslam
2012-02-02 10:56:45 PM
I miss
this
Kelly Clarkson.
bukketmaster
2012-02-03 12:56:48 AM
Meatschool
:
Mr.Poops: Mildot: Hope she wears this...
[4.bp.blogspot.com image 267x400]
Not cute, not hot. She looks like a loaf of spam with a bikini thrown on
That's ok. I like Spam... get some eggs fried up with it... yeah buddy, that's good eatin'
I'd eat it.
tetzy
2012-02-03 01:43:43 AM
Honest to God - the last thing I heard about Justin Guarini was that he was drug addicted and making his living starring in gay porn.
Amurica...Fark Ya!
2012-02-03 04:34:27 PM
Mildot
:
Hope she wears this...
[4.bp.blogspot.com image 267x400]
Haha, time travel would be awesome.
But seriously, I will leave this here for the fatty chasers around this depressing thread.
Amurica...Fark Ya!
2012-02-03 04:35:34 PM
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