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(Huffington Post)   How to survive tornados. Step 1: leave Missouri and Oklahoma. Step 2: repeat Step 1 as necessary   (huffingtonpost.com) divider line 32
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2041 clicks; posted to Main » on 01 Feb 2012 at 11:32 AM   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2012-02-01 11:17:45 AM
Step 1: Check the radar
Step 2: If it's not coming towards you, go outside and watch
 
2012-02-01 11:21:32 AM
I've often been thankful that my grandparents had the sense to move out of Oklahoma

/and not just because of the weather
 
2012-02-01 11:24:43 AM
Uh, Colorado also has a very high tornado frequency, due to the higher elevation, and northern Alabama is tornado alley for early spring. The upper Midwest and Northeast get derechos fairly frequently, which while not usually spawning tornadoes produce massive straight line wind damage.
 
2012-02-01 11:35:10 AM
Mentat: Step 1: Check the radar
Step 2: If it's not coming towards you, go outside and watch


what, are you from California?
 
2012-02-01 11:37:13 AM
Step 3: Now that you're safe, spell "tornadoes" correctly
 
2012-02-01 11:38:25 AM
Or move to Oxford, Mississippi. You rarely see touchdowns there.
 
2012-02-01 11:38:28 AM
"Anybody seen the remote?"
i.huffpost.com
 
2012-02-01 11:38:33 AM
Wipe your dog's feet stomach after a winter's walk, since ice-melting chemicals are dangerous to pets.
Eh?
Oh, you're a TV meteorologist, never mind.
 
2012-02-01 11:41:35 AM
Lightnining? WTF is that? And why is the wildfire picture a picture of what appears to be tornado damage and exploding paint cans?

Guy's a tard.
 
2012-02-01 11:46:11 AM
Yeah; you have a better chance of winning the lottery than being hurt in a tornado. Although, those chances skyrocket if you live in a trailer park: because, god hates trailer parks. You never hear native Americans say, "heard em a loud noise, like choo-choo; then tepee was ripped off of ground"

/ I'd like an exit row
 
2012-02-01 11:47:08 AM
Mentat: Step 1: Check the radar
Step 2: If it's not coming towards you, go outside and watch


That's how I was brought up.
 
2012-02-01 11:52:05 AM
iheartscotch: heard em a loud noise, like choo-choo; then tepee was ripped off of ground"

If you're in a tepee that's ripped off the ground by a tornado, chances are, you would be saying anything.
 
2012-02-01 11:55:54 AM
Voiceofreason01: Mentat: Step 1: Check the radar
Step 2: If it's not coming towards you, go outside and watch

what, are you from California?


I've gained a bit of caution in my old age.
 
2012-02-01 11:57:08 AM
NightOwl2255: iheartscotch: heard em a loud noise, like choo-choo; then tepee was ripped off of ground"

If you're in a tepee that's ripped off the ground by a tornado, chances are, you would be saying anything.


We had a pair of teepees in our backyard when I was a kid. Let me tell you, when a tornado came through, it was two tents.
 
2012-02-01 11:57:40 AM
Mentat: Step 1: Check the radar
Step 2: If it's not coming towards you, go outside and watch


Yep. I have a great video of a funnel cloud from this spring.

I am leaving MO...straight into the heart of lake effect snow country.
 
2012-02-01 11:58:03 AM
Mentat: Voiceofreason01: Mentat: Step 1: Check the radar
Step 2: If it's not coming towards you, go outside and watch

what, are you from California?

I've gained a bit of caution in my old age.


I've known plenty of people with Ph.D.'s in meteorology and atmospheric science who go up onto the roof when a storm is coming. They, and I, can tell when it's time to come back in because you're about to get walloped.
 
2012-02-01 11:58:39 AM
images.nationalgeographic.com

geopubs.wr.usgs.gov

Because the East and West coasts are sooooooo much safer.

/Subby forgets where his food is grown and would do best to keep his mouth shut
 
2012-02-01 11:59:47 AM
NightOwl2255: iheartscotch: heard em a loud noise, like choo-choo; then tepee was ripped off of ground"

If you're in a tepee that's ripped off the ground by a tornado, chances are, you would be saying anything.


It's a joke; I figured that was pretty obvious; I guess not.
 
2012-02-01 12:05:56 PM
Marine1: [images.nationalgeographic.com image 600x450]

[geopubs.wr.usgs.gov image 478x336]

Because the East and West coasts are sooooooo much safer.

/Subby forgets where his food is grown and would do best to keep his mouth shut


All the high fructose corn syrup comes from there, but all the fruit and veggies come from the west coast.
 
2012-02-01 12:08:39 PM
Marine1: [images.nationalgeographic.com image 600x450]

[geopubs.wr.usgs.gov image 478x336]

Because the East and West coasts are sooooooo much safer.

/Subby forgets where his food is grown and would do best to keep his mouth shut tax dollars go to subsidize a jobs program that creates products which could be produced cheaper elsewhere


Don't get all high and mighty because there's a farm by you. There's farms in every state.

/midwesterner
 
2012-02-01 12:09:09 PM
GAT_00: Mentat: Voiceofreason01: Mentat: Step 1: Check the radar
Step 2: If it's not coming towards you, go outside and watch

what, are you from California?

I've gained a bit of caution in my old age.

I've known plenty of people with Ph.D.'s in meteorology and atmospheric science who go up onto the roof when a storm is coming. They, and I, can tell when it's time to come back in because you're about to get walloped.


/csb

I was talking to a couple of meterologist here at the National Weather Center and during one of the tornado out breaks we had either last year or the year before a bunch of them were standing outside the building watching the tornado come and go until somebody mentioned it would probably not look good if the got hit outside the NWS building. Not sure if they went back in or not.
 
2012-02-01 12:10:15 PM
AcneVulgaris: Marine1: [images.nationalgeographic.com image 600x450]

[geopubs.wr.usgs.gov image 478x336]

Because the East and West coasts are sooooooo much safer.

/Subby forgets where his food is grown and would do best to keep his mouth shut

All the high fructose corn syrup comes from there, but all the fruit and veggies come from the west coast.


Are they underground fruits that we probably haven't heard of? I ask because, from the pictures I see, there's a lot of fruits on the coasts.

/ I made a funny
 
2012-02-01 12:16:52 PM
A tornado hit the campus of the MO college i went to 3 of the 4 years I was there.
 
2012-02-01 12:29:13 PM
forteblast: Step 3: Now that you're safe, spell "tornadoes" correctly

Subby must be Dan Quayle.
 
2012-02-01 12:29:25 PM
The problem with tornado warnings is that the NWS issues one whenever their doppler radar detects cloud rotation anywhere in the vicinity of a bow echo. When they do that, the county emergency management agency sets of the tornado horns. Almost invariably, there is no tornado. Result: everyone ignores the warnings. This will be tragic one day. So there is such a thing as being too careful.
 
2012-02-01 12:32:46 PM
JackieRabbit: The problem with tornado warnings is that the NWS issues one whenever their doppler radar detects cloud rotation anywhere in the vicinity of a bow echo. When they do that, the county emergency management agency sets of the tornado horns. Almost invariably, there is no tornado. Result: everyone ignores the warnings. This will be tragic one day. So there is such a thing as being too careful.

Yes, because the better solution is to only issue a warning when the tornado is on the ground.
 
2012-02-01 12:37:14 PM
iheartscotch: Yeah; you have a better chance of winning the lottery than being hurt in a tornado. Although, those chances skyrocket if you live in a trailer park: because, god hates trailer parks. You never hear native Americans say, "heard em a loud noise, like choo-choo; then tepee was ripped off of ground"

/ I'd like an exit row


I better go by my lotto tickets then. I've:
- been IN one tornado as it ripped tiles off my roof in PA (F0, passed by/over my house and 8" ripped branches off a 50 year maple like it was pulling taffy), Like an idiot, I stood next to the window and watched it go by.
- been chased down a road by another tornado in Nebraska,
- had another tornado (F3, ripped a 1/5 mile wide swath of trees out of the ground for about a mile) touch down and then skip over my block when I lived in NC
- watched a waterspout dance just off shore on Lake Superior (which was awesome, by the way)
- and (although I know it probably doesn't count) while I was an officer in the US Army, I put on my Kevlar helmet, flak jacket and raybans and walked through a huge-ass dust devil. Which is a totally stupid name for them. They should be called "Dust, Stinging Dirt, Dangerously Fast Moving Small Pebbles, And The Occasional Large Rock And/Or Mesquite Branch Devils." When I came out of that thing, I had more bruises, scrapes, and lacerations than I had ever had in my entire life. I also had my entire battalion looking at me like I was some kind of crazy bad ass, and it earned me the nickname "Lieutenant Diablo." So it was totally worth it. (In truth, I wasn't going for bad ass- I honestly thought they were just "dust" devils.)
 
2012-02-01 12:45:52 PM
freewill: Mentat: Step 1: Check the radar
Step 2: If it's not coming towards you, go outside and watch

That's how I was brought up.


Same here. Tornado watching and striper fishing: the only good things about living in western Kansas.
 
2012-02-01 12:55:09 PM
Mentat: Step 1: Check the radar
Step 2: If it's not coming towards you, go outside and watch


This. Oklahomans are always the people to stand outside and look up when there's bad weather, but we do typically have enough good sense to check the radar and make sure the tornado is far enough away that we probably can't see anything anyway.

/never seen a tornado, despite living here for 33 years
//watched plenty of tornado-spawning storms pass by, though.
///did once drive within a mile of a rain-wrapped tornado. On I-40. In New Mexico. Only found out when I stopped for the night.
 
2012-02-01 12:57:34 PM
CheetahOlivetti: freewill: Mentat: Step 1: Check the radar
Step 2: If it's not coming towards you, go outside and watch

That's how I was brought up.

Same here. Tornado watching and striper fishing: the only good things about living in western Kansas.


How does one fish for strippers? Can you teach me?

/yeah yeah I know
 
2012-02-01 02:00:44 PM
What about Florida?

- #2 in tornadoes

- #2 in hurricanes

- #1 in old people

Flo-ri-da, Flo-ri-da!
 
2012-02-02 05:32:06 AM
Having lived in Tornado Alley most of my life, I can offer the following suggestions:

1) If it's still light outside, and the clouds have an icky green color to them, time to go somewhere else.

2) If you go outside an hear an eerie sound, get in the car and drive.

Having lived through a Hurricane in Georgia, I can offer the following suggestions:

1) If your house is being pounded by easterly winds, stay in the house, stay away from windows.

2) If there is no wind, and the air seems to go dead, stay in the house, stay away from windows.

3) If your house is being pounded by westerly winds, stay in the house, stay away from windows.
 
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