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The most polite "Fark you, you S.O.B." letter it's ever been subby's pleasure to read
(
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Rubberband Girl
2012-01-31 05:35:03 PM
My favorite part of the whole letter:
Say howdy to George Carter, and thank him for taking the pistol from you when you were shooting at me.
Oh, to be a fly on the wall when the former master was reading this masterpiece!
bamph
2012-01-31 05:40:05 PM
Did the term "pwnage" exist in the 1860s, because that's what we're reading here? Pure, 100%, unadulterated, glorious pwnage.
nekom
2012-01-31 05:55:25 PM
bamph
:
Did the term "pwnage" exist in the 1860s, because that's what we're reading here? Pure, 100%, unadulterated, glorious pwnage.
I think they were trying to phase that word out by then.
/full of what modern day pwnage has come to mean, +1
FNG
2012-01-31 06:05:23 PM
Just.... beautiful.
Nadie_AZ
2012-01-31 06:08:35 PM
Oh wow ...
I want to know particularly what the good chance is you propose to give me. I am doing tolerably well here. I get twenty-five dollars a month, with victuals and clothing; have a comfortable home for Mandy,-the folks call her Mrs. Anderson,-and the children-Milly, Jane, and Grundy-go to school and are learning well
....
Now if you will write and say what wages you will give me, I will be better able to decide whether it would be to my advantage to move back again.
....
we have concluded to test your sincerity by asking you to send us our wages for the time we served you. This will make us forget and forgive old scores, and rely on your justice and friendship in the future. I served you faithfully for thirty-two years, and Mandy twenty years. At twenty-five dollars a month for me, and two dollars a week for Mandy, our earnings would amount to eleven thousand six hundred and eighty dollars. Add to this the interest for the time our wages have been kept back, and deduct what you paid for our clothing, and three doctor's visits to me, and pulling a tooth for Mandy, and the balance will show what we are in justice entitled to. Please send the money by Adams's Express, in care of V. Winters, Esq., Dayton, Ohio. If you fail to pay us for faithful labors in the past, we can have little faith in your promises in the future
This man is my personal hero.
germ78
2012-01-31 06:15:19 PM
Never in the history of this image has it ever been more appropriate.
mitchcumstein1
2012-01-31 06:27:31 PM
That was goddamned beautiful.
logruszed
2012-01-31 07:28:26 PM
He's so well-spoken.
Rufus Lee King
2012-01-31 07:28:48 PM
Quite authentic.
ashinmytomatoes
2012-01-31 07:30:02 PM
My God, its full of stars.
/That was awesome.
//Thanks, subby.
Mawson of the Antarctic
2012-01-31 07:31:17 PM
(it'sbeautiful.jpg)
They should've sent a poet. Oh snap, they did.
calbert
2012-01-31 07:31:21 PM
Fark needs an 'uppity' tag
WellBelowAverage
2012-01-31 07:31:49 PM
logruszed
:
He's so well-spoken.
Clean
and
well spoken. He should run for president.
Joe Biden
ukexpat
2012-01-31 07:31:54 PM
Farking brilliant!
jagec
2012-01-31 07:31:57 PM
Well, that's what you get for teaching them to read...they get all uppity and forget their station!
/ugh, I feel slimy typing that.
MooseUpNorth
2012-01-31 07:33:12 PM
Oh snap indeed.
Magorn
2012-01-31 07:33:39 PM
nekom
:
bamph: Did the term "pwnage" exist in the 1860s, because that's what we're reading here? Pure, 100%, unadulterated, glorious pwnage.
I think they were trying to phase that word out by then.
/full of what modern day pwnage has come to mean, +1
I read that in Richard Pyror's voice and added "PS: Kiss. My. Black Ass, Honkey
bob_ross
2012-01-31 07:34:45 PM
Heavily edited or not written by a slave.
9beers
2012-01-31 07:38:04 PM
Fake!
TV's Vinnie
2012-01-31 07:39:04 PM
A violent slave-owner who murdered a Union soldier and wanted to have his former slave move back South to work for him like in the good old days, on the promise that he won't beat him as much as he used to, with a "Hey, just because Lincoln freed you doesn't mean you can't be my property again, right?" attitude.
I just KNOW this guy has to be some republican Sentator's ancestor! No doubt about it!
jvl
2012-01-31 07:40:07 PM
Shenanigans.
erveek
2012-01-31 07:40:41 PM
calbert
:
Fark needs an 'uppity' tag
That way, the politics tab would only need two tags. (Hero being the other one)
fusillade762
2012-01-31 07:40:59 PM
logruszed
:
He's so well-spoken.
Indeed. Remarkably eloquent. I didn't know slaves got such good educations in those days. You'd be hard pressed to find a modern day teenager who knows what the word "recompense" means.
pdieten
2012-01-31 07:41:08 PM
bob_ross
:
Heavily edited or not written by a slave.
The link to the real article mentions the letter was dictated. I presume the actual writer was an educated man who translated the former slave's vernacular into then-current American English.
Chinchillazilla
2012-01-31 07:42:26 PM
Say howdy to George Carter, and thank him for taking the pistol from you when you were shooting at me.
So Jourdon was obviously really great, but this George guy deserves some props too.
Mini Ditka
2012-01-31 07:42:27 PM
9beers
:
Fake!
Seconded.
jingks
2012-01-31 07:42:57 PM
bob_ross
:
Heavily edited or not written by a slave.
I was thinking the same. Did the slave master give him classes in prose?
jingks
2012-01-31 07:44:04 PM
pdieten
:
bob_ross: Heavily edited or not written by a slave.
The link to the real article mentions the letter was dictated. I presume the actual writer was an educated man who translated the former slave's vernacular into then-current American English.
That makes much more sense.
Mr Rusty Shackleford
2012-01-31 07:44:04 PM
Guy sounds like he was a badass.
GroverCleveland
2012-01-31 07:44:29 PM
civil war troll thread!
hoho19
2012-01-31 07:44:42 PM
It makes mention of
pdieten
:
bob_ross: Heavily edited or not written by a slave.
The link to the real article mentions the letter was dictated. I presume the actual writer was an educated man who translated the former slave's vernacular into then-current American English.
It makes mention to send the eleven thousand dollars to a lawyer. It was probably a lawyer that was helping former slaves send letters to their masters for a cut of the back pay.
Nadie_AZ
2012-01-31 07:45:11 PM
jingks
:
bob_ross: Heavily edited or not written by a slave.
I was thinking the same. Did the slave master give him classes in prose?
Weren't their people employed to write down what people told them to do? I mean for those who could not read or write, they would pay someone to read or write the item for them.
Else perhaps the slave was a house slave that helped with day to day things.
Spoon over Marin
2012-01-31 07:45:46 PM
Nice.
Tickle Mittens
2012-01-31 07:47:20 PM
jingks
:
bob_ross: Heavily edited or not written by a slave.
I was thinking the same. Did the slave master give him classes in prose?
Notice the mention that the wages should be sent to a lawyer? I would guess that the specifics were dictated to this (quaker?) lawyer who just dressed it up but let it stand as the monument to man who did very well for himself using very little.
GT_bike
2012-01-31 07:47:45 PM
hoho19
:
It makes mention of pdieten: bob_ross: Heavily edited or not written by a slave.
The link to the real article mentions the letter was dictated. I presume the actual writer was an educated man who translated the former slave's vernacular into then-current American English.
It makes mention to send the eleven thousand dollars to a lawyer. It was probably a lawyer that was helping former slaves send letters to their masters for a cut of the back pay.
Imagining a Jacoby and Jacoby style lawyer involved makes chuckle. I wonder how much lemonade the ol Colonel spat when he read the letter.
LeroyBourne
2012-01-31 07:48:52 PM
I'm glad to see there were snarky sob's with great senses of humor way back then.
Cletus from Canuckistan
2012-01-31 07:49:25 PM
It's real. Here it is printed in the New York Tribune:
Gen. Patton Harvey Oswalt
2012-01-31 07:49:30 PM
I'm confused. I've been led to believe by Teabaggers that slavery wasn't a big deal, and that the Civil War was a states rights/property rights issue, which is why they want it edited out of the history books. Surely if that were true, letters like this wouldn't exist, as all those African-Americans needed to do was use their bootstraps to find a well-paying job, and stop being such a welfare drain on their poor owners? What's a poor Canadian to believe?
R.A.Danny
2012-01-31 07:49:56 PM
I'm just going to mention,yet again, the win in this phrase :
Say howdy to George Carter, and thank him for taking the pistol from you when you were shooting at me.
Win win WINNING win win.
Magorn
2012-01-31 07:51:03 PM
Nadie_AZ
:
jingks: bob_ross: Heavily edited or not written by a slave.with
I was thinking the same. Did the slave master give him classes in prose?
Weren't their people employed to write down what people told them to do? I mean for those who could not read or write, they would pay someone to read or write the item for them.
Else perhaps the slave was a house slave that helped with day to day things.
another former slave who was a tolerable hand with a pen:
Coco LaFemme
2012-01-31 07:51:04 PM
That was goddamn awesome. Even if the letter had been written using the language Mr. Anderson was comfortable using, rather than the more eloquent words the person who took the dictation used, it still would have been goddamn awesome. I don't know if I was in Mr. Anderson's position, using whatever English I knew, I could have been that gracious, despite what I had to live through for 32 years.
I gotta say, that's major brass balls on the former slave owner's part to actually request that a freed man come back and go back to being a slave.
Ben Enya
2012-01-31 07:51:32 PM
tl; dr
Up and Atom
2012-01-31 07:51:39 PM
Nadie_AZ
:
Weren't their people employed to write down what people told them to do? I mean for those who could not read or write, they would pay someone to read or write the item for them.
Scriveners.
/Also, what do you mean, THEIR people?
buckler
2012-01-31 07:51:55 PM
I have to wonder if he ever got any response. Something tells me he didn't.
DaveX
2012-01-31 07:52:24 PM
Just awesome!
buckler
2012-01-31 07:53:03 PM
Coco LaFemme
:
I gotta say, that's major brass balls on the former slave owner's part to actually request that a freed man come back and go back to being a slave.
My guess he was asking him to come back to work for wages, but that still takes an awful lot of chutzpah.
Pelvic Splanchnic Ganglion
2012-01-31 07:53:11 PM
Cletus from Canuckistan
:
It's real. Here it is printed in the New York Tribune:
[farm8.staticflickr.com image 640x717]
Printed in the newspaper? It MUST be true! No paper would ever fabricate a story!
Why Would I Read the Article
2012-01-31 07:55:32 PM
Gen. Patton Harvey Oswalt
:
I'm confused. I've been led to believe by Teabaggers that slavery wasn't a big deal, and that the Civil War was a states rights/property rights issue, which is why they want it edited out of the history books. Surely if that were true, letters like this wouldn't exist, as all those African-Americans needed to do was use their bootstraps to find a well-paying job, and stop being such a welfare drain on their poor owners? What's a poor Canadian to believe?
Are you actually an idiot, or do you just play one on Fark?
FlashHarry
2012-01-31 07:55:56 PM
according to the tennessee tea party, slavery was a good thing, so this letter is immaterial.
ko_kyi
2012-01-31 07:55:58 PM
jagec
:
Well, that's what you get for teaching them to read...they get all uppity and forget their station!
/ugh, I feel slimy typing that.
Frederick Douglas wrote that his owner said much the same when he found out his wife taught Frederick to read. "Once they learn to read, they will never be satisfied as slaves."
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