The way I explained "older guys" to my daughter, when I talked to her about older guys who come around as boyfriends of high school girls, and they've got cars and money to buy the girls stuff, and they're in college or out working a job:

I told her to think of the boys who were the bottom of the barrel losers in her grade. Think of the 5 skeeziest, creepiest boys. The ones that make the hair on her neck stand up. Yeah them, I told her. Those are the guys who are going to end up cruising the high schools looking to date high school girls.

"When you date the older guys who cruise the high schools, you're dating another grade's rejects. What's wrong with them that none of the girls their own age will date them?"

She shuddered.

She got the point.

And well, again with this girl. Boys her own age have figured out she's a crazy slut. Generally speaking, I hate slut-shaming, but in this case, this girl's attitude and behavior are such that guys her own age will fark her---but they probably aren't burning up her phone with callbacks to date her.

So.....the 14 year old doesn't know she's her own grade's reject.

I know I'm simplifying. Some guys improve after high school. Some guys who were okay on the social ladder hit the skids and wind up the skeezy rejects. But for the sake of educating a young teenage girl that the older boyfriend with the car and the cash was not a prize---I was willing to grossly oversimplify.

I really don't understand why these teachers and babysitters are so obsessed with teenage boys. I mean, is it the acne that turns them on? Immaturity? Underdeveloped bodies?

Aren't there plenty of 20-year-old guys who would kill to get a chance with her? Is she mentally ill?

ongbok: Mr Rusty Shackleford: ongbok: I don't have a problem with people farking. I have a problem with adults taking advantage of children and using them. Why do you think she was with this kid? It wasn't because she found so incredibly irresistible, it was because she could control and manipulate him with sex, alcohol and drugs. This wasn't about sex with her it was about control. By her own words this was the best relationship she had ever been in, and it was because she knew she could control this kid unlike adults her own age.

Were there alcohol and drugs involved? I supposed I may have missed that part. I completely agree that taking advantage and coercion immediately escalates the situation into the "wrong" category.

That is the main reason why adults, both men and woman, fark around with teens. It isn't for their witty conversation. It is because they are young and easy to control.

I guess I just don't stack this high on my list of worldly concerns. If you're getting them drunk, you're coercing them, which is factored into nearly every law dealing with age of consent. Aside from this, determining from a legal aspect appropriate intentions vs inappropriate seems ridiculous. Set the age somewhere reasonable, puberty type of years, prohibit coercive actions, and let the people and the relevant parents deal with it.

Wayne 985: I really don't understand why these teachers and babysitters are so obsessed with teenage boys. I mean, is it the acne that turns them on? Immaturity? Underdeveloped bodies?

Aren't there plenty of 20-year-old guys who would kill to get a chance with her? Is she mentally ill?

Control. I'm a guy, so I can't exactly tell you from a girl's perspective... but no, its not like a slutty woman (even an attractive one) can automatically find a guy to fark over and over... unless the guy is really creepy, or much younger.

Darth_Lukecash: downstairs: thomps: downstairs: Isn't 20 a little old for babysitting? I mean, I had a real part-time job at 16 (the earliest one could legally work in IL.)

yeah but then you had to bang 14 year old boys on your own time.

Well, I'm a dude... not saying I was looking to babysit. Just saying once I turned legal to work, my parents expected me to get a real job, with good hours, right away.

It may have been a case of just doing a favor for the neighbor.

Anyways, chances are she was molested herself, when she was a chid.

And I know a lot if guys are high fixing the kid, but I have a freind who works with kids that are molested. They really get farked up socially and mentally. Socially because the other kids ostracize them, mentally because the kids deal everything through the lense of sexuality.

I was molested as a kid. I didn't grow up to molest anyone else... Nor am I mentally or socially messed up.. and never ostracized because no one else knew.
I didn't deal with everything sexually.

So.. yeah.

Wayne 985: I really don't understand why these teachers and babysitters are so obsessed with teenage boys. I mean, is it the acne that turns them on? Immaturity? Underdeveloped bodies?

Aren't there plenty of 20-year-old guys who would kill to get a chance with her? Is she mentally ill?

She probably is a few fries short of a happy meal.

But with the teachers in general, who also tend to be a few fries short of a happy meal, I wouldn't do it, but I understand why they're tempted.

You get middle aged and you go out looking for guys and most of the single guys that come on to you are ten or twenty years older than you are. Some of them, sometimes, are your age. Maybe a bit younger.

You go to bed with some of them. And you discover something very unhappy. They aren't as hard as they used to be. It can actually take work to get these guys hard enough to screw--which the more work it takes as opposed to fun, the more of a buzzkill it is, but okay you can usually get things working. Until you run into Just Can't Come or its cousin Let's Take a Break and Try Again in a Few Minutes and Oh, That Drink Is Really Coming Back to Haunt Me.

This is harsh, I know this is harsh, and we, being women, don't say it. We just try to cope while we sit there, bewildered, and really don't know what the hell to do about it and meanwhile are not having all that great a time. No guy wants or is willing to hear, "Viagra, buddy. This means you." And, of course, since the porno moves and such finally get him hard and he finally thank god comes, he goes home convinced that other guys may have a problem but his dick works just fine.

Um....no. Able to get and sustain an erection with heroic effort by a female and able to usually reach orgasm during sex with a female who has perused every scrap of porn she can find please god trying to find ways to get you the fark off is not your dick still working just fine. Earth to John Thomas, order the damn blue pills.

So. We can cougar up and try to go after the 20's to low 30's, and some women do, but those guys are pretty spoiled for choice because, well, a hard prick, every girl wants to ride one.

And there those teachers are with those precocious young studs strutting their stuff and positively reeking of testosterone and pheromones. And most of them sexually frustrated and not getting laid and being loud and rowdy in their protestations that they really wanna be getting laid.

It's like taking a chick with PMS and putting a box of Godiva truffles on her desk each morning and saying, "Don't eat 'em."

Except teenage boys are human beings, not candy.

And, "I really wanted it," is no excuse.

mjbok: Julie Cochrane: "When you date the older guys who cruise the high schools, you're dating another grade's rejects. What's wrong with them that none of the girls their own age will date them?"

Does this apply if they started dating while he was still in high school (think Senior, Soph. relationship) and continued to date, or should he dump her as soon as he gets his diploma?

The size of the age gap matters.

Julie Cochrane: You go to bed with some of them. And you discover something very unhappy. They aren't as hard as they used to be. It can actually take work to get these guys hard enough to screw--which the more work it takes as opposed to fun, the more of a buzzkill it is, but okay you can usually get things working. Until you run into Just Can't Come or its cousin Let's Take a Break and Try Again in a Few Minutes and Oh, That Drink Is Really Coming Back to Haunt Me.

This is harsh, I know this is harsh, and we, being women, don't say it. We just try to cope while we sit there, bewildered, and really don't know what the hell to do about it and meanwhile are not having all that great a time. No guy wants or is willing to hear, "Viagra, buddy. This means you." And, of course, since the porno moves and such finally get him hard and he finally thank god comes, he goes home convinced that other guys may have a problem but his dick works just fine.

Um....no. Able to get and sustain an erection with heroic effort by a female and able to usually reach orgasm during sex with a female who has perused every scrap of porn she can find please god trying to find ways to get you the fark off is not your dick still working just fine. Earth to John Thomas, order the damn blue pills.

So. We can cougar up and try to go after the 20's to low 30's, and some women do, but those guys are pretty spoiled for choice because, well, a hard prick, every girl wants to ride one.

Julie... this is sounding personal... I like it.

I was barely 15, he was 17, a pair of young, horny and dumb teenagers. We managed to figure out where everything was supposed to go. I don't think either of us scarred the other one emotionally for life. I thought we were in love. I think he did, too. Broke each other's hearts pretty good, but that's just the way it goes.

Julie Cochrane: Wayne 985: I really don't understand why these teachers and babysitters are so obsessed with teenage boys. I mean, is it the acne that turns them on? Immaturity? Underdeveloped bodies?

Aren't there plenty of 20-year-old guys who would kill to get a chance with her? Is she mentally ill?

She probably is a few fries short of a happy meal.

But with the teachers in general, who also tend to be a few fries short of a happy meal, I wouldn't do it, but I understand why they're tempted.

You get middle aged and you go out looking for guys and most of the single guys that come on to you are ten or twenty years older than you are. Some of them, sometimes, are your age. Maybe a bit younger.

You go to bed with some of them. And you discover something very unhappy. They aren't as hard as they used to be. It can actually take work to get these guys hard enough to screw--which the more work it takes as opposed to fun, the more of a buzzkill it is, but okay you can usually get things working. Until you run into Just Can't Come or its cousin Let's Take a Break and Try Again in a Few Minutes and Oh, That Drink Is Really Coming Back to Haunt Me.

This is harsh, I know this is harsh, and we, being women, don't say it. We just try to cope while we sit there, bewildered, and really don't know what the hell to do about it and meanwhile are not having all that great a time. No guy wants or is willing to hear, "Viagra, buddy. This means you." And, of course, since the porno moves and such finally get him hard and he finally thank god comes, he goes home convinced that other guys may have a problem but his dick works just fine.

Um....no. Able to get and sustain an erection with heroic effort by a female and able to usually reach orgasm during sex with a female who has perused every scrap of porn she can find please god trying to find ways to get you the fark off is not your dick still working just fine. Earth to John Thomas, order the damn blue pills.

So. We can cougar up and try to go ...

Wow.

You've sort of made me torn here. On one hand, that was a very good explanation. On the other, it was almost too thorough, like you've been giving it a lot of thought on a personal level.



Anything you want to tell us?

I'm a writer. It's what I do. I was on a roll. :-)

MarkEC: WOW, I really didn't know there were that many limp dicks out there. I'm 49 and can still hang a hat on it. When the time comes that I need a little blue pill to help me, I'll take it without hesitation.

How YOU doin?

/oblig?
//maybe not ;-)

When I was 14 years old, I would have been all over that like a monkey farking a football.

namegoeshere: You keep that shiat up, Missy, and I might just have to pink you.

Um, giggity?