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(CNN)   Use of euphemisms is distorting the truth about what happened at Penn State when Jerry Sandusky played squish the wrinkly Vienna sausage into the budding brown balloon knot   (cnn.com) divider line 50
    More: Interesting, Penn State, Jerry Sandusky, Mike McQueary, Drexel University, Poynter Institute, graduate assistant, Pennsylvania Attorney General, Joe Paterno  
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1560 clicks; posted to Sports » on 30 Jan 2012 at 8:34 AM (3 years ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



50 Comments   (+0 »)
   
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest

Archived thread
 
2012-01-30 08:19:42 AM  
I thought it was a chocolate starfish?
 
2012-01-30 08:30:28 AM  
FTA: "Sodomy, rape and anal intercourse are not easy words for men, especially jocks, to verbalize..."

And yet references to such acts are such a large part of their witty repartee.
 
2012-01-30 08:39:58 AM  
This case is overblown. A little anal sex never hurt anybody...
 
2012-01-30 08:41:48 AM  
For Sandusky's kids, the Second Mile was always the hardest mile.
 
2012-01-30 08:45:39 AM  
He Santorumed the kid!!
 
2012-01-30 08:51:14 AM  
FTFA: Of course, the suspected sexual abuse of a child is no topic for a party game.

Obviously, going to the wrong parties. You should see our "Cornhole Pictionary" games, especially once you get Martha sauced up:

*draws horrific image on whiteboard* "That's...um...that's... I KNOW! That's Jerry Sandusky pinning a kid down in a gym shower and cornholing him bareback!" *passes the marker*
 
2012-01-30 08:52:14 AM  

mc_madness: This case is overblown. A little anal sex never hurt anybody...


A little oral sex can make your whole day. A little anal sex can make your hole weak.
 
2012-01-30 08:52:43 AM  
Paterno was an enabler, I hope he's digging ditches in Hell right now.
 
2012-01-30 08:54:46 AM  
HAI GUYS! WHAT'S GOING ON THIS THREAD DISCUSSING PENN STATE USING COERCION TO COVER UP CHILD SEX ABUSE?

o.aolcdn.com

/McQueary knows he'll be swimming with the fishes
 
2012-01-30 08:56:13 AM  
McQueary saw Sandusky slamming some kid up the ass in the shower and just went on his merry way.
 
2012-01-30 08:58:03 AM  

Jake Havechek: McQueary saw Sandusky slamming some kid up the ass in the shower and just went on his merry way.


Because, y'know, some day that could be him scoring some twink mancandy, so why ruin the fun, right?
 
2012-01-30 09:04:44 AM  
He's an expert in child-rearing.
 
2012-01-30 09:06:21 AM  
As any astronaut would tell you, good hygiene starts with Uranus.
 
2012-01-30 09:09:53 AM  
I went to high school with McQueary.

He was a giant douche
 
2012-01-30 09:11:29 AM  
So during freshman orientation, are the football locker room showers going to be a stop on the tour?
 
2012-01-30 09:19:17 AM  

Jake Havechek: Paterno was an enabler, I hope he's digging ditches in Hell right now.


Hyperbole is fun.

You are really good at it. Keep going.
 
2012-01-30 09:30:15 AM  

Jake Havechek: So during freshman orientation, are the football locker room showers going to be a stop on the tour?


"And here, folks, are the locker room showers. Note the padded handrails completely encircling the shower enclosure, for your comfort and safety, and the whiteboard just outside the shower, which we use to post today's safe word."
 
2012-01-30 09:30:31 AM  

treecologist: Jake Havechek: Paterno was an enabler, I hope he's digging ditches in Hell right now.

Hyperbole is fun.

You are really good at it. Keep going.


Paterno brough millions of dollars to Penn State in football tickets. Neisworth and Lasaga helped bring in millions in federal research grants. Some minor child abuse should not tarnish their great legacies.

/Paterno once benched a badly behaved player! He is a hero!
 
2012-01-30 09:32:53 AM  

treecologist: Jake Havechek: Paterno was an enabler, I hope he's digging ditches in Hell right now.

Hyperbole is fun.

You are really good at it. Keep going.


How is "stating the truth" equivalent to "hyperbole"? Paterno knew what was going on.
 
2012-01-30 09:34:39 AM  
Either Paterno knew or he was grossly incompetent. Neither is cause for hero worship.
 
2012-01-30 09:42:30 AM  
Interestingly an article about "words matter" misquotes Paterno in a negative way. The article quotes him as saying "I should have done more." He actually said "With the benefit of hindsight, I wish I had done more."

Now, whether you think he's a saint or Satan, I think you have to admit that those two sentences are rather different and that the misquote is designed to cast a decidedly negative spin on his comment.
 
2012-01-30 09:46:35 AM  
If I was Penn State alumni, I would go around advertising it.

Sodomy U.
 
2012-01-30 09:47:11 AM  

beta_plus: treecologist: Jake Havechek: Paterno was an enabler, I hope he's digging ditches in Hell right now.

Hyperbole is fun.

You are really good at it. Keep going.

Paterno brough millions of dollars to Penn State in football tickets. Neisworth and Lasaga helped bring in millions in federal research grants. Some minor child abuse should not tarnish their great legacies.

/Paterno once benched a badly behaved player! He is a hero!


Ad hominem AND hyperbole. Two of the most important Fark debate techniques. Pretty good but you can do better; you are still missing a few. Keep going.
 
2012-01-30 09:48:02 AM  

feefifofimmy: Interestingly an article about "words matter" misquotes Paterno in a negative way. The article quotes him as saying "I should have done more." He actually said "With the benefit of hindsight, I wish I had done more."

Now, whether you think he's a saint or Satan, I think you have to admit that those two sentences are rather different and that the misquote is designed to cast a decidedly negative spin on his comment.


I don't know, I think they'd have had enough of people in power looking at the hinds of anything.
 
2012-01-30 09:50:33 AM  
I mean I wouldn't.
 
2012-01-30 09:54:25 AM  

FormlessOne: treecologist: Jake Havechek: Paterno was an enabler, I hope he's digging ditches in Hell right now.

Hyperbole is fun.

You are really good at it. Keep going.

How is "stating the truth" equivalent to "hyperbole"? Paterno knew what was going on.


This article, from the days immediately after the scandal hit the national media, is full of nonsense. It proves nothing about what Paterno knew. For example, the sentence "Joe Paterno bears responsibility for all of the children that Jerry Sandusky sexually assaulted" is just nonsense and can be repudiated because it is essentially reductio ad absurdum.

Furthermore, there is actual evidence that Attorney General, now Governor, Tom Corbett DID know what was going on and chose to do nothing for purely political reasons (new window).
 
2012-01-30 10:01:12 AM  

treecologist: beta_plus: treecologist: Jake Havechek: Paterno was an enabler, I hope he's digging ditches in Hell right now.

Hyperbole is fun.

You are really good at it. Keep going.

Paterno brough millions of dollars to Penn State in football tickets. Neisworth and Lasaga helped bring in millions in federal research grants. Some minor child abuse should not tarnish their great legacies.

/Paterno once benched a badly behaved player! He is a hero!

Ad hominem AND hyperbole. Two of the most important Fark debate techniques. Pretty good but you can do better; you are still missing a few. Keep going.


Making BS claims of not following proper debating technique to cover for a school that:

1) Harbored and protected 3 child rapists
2) Had a DA "disappeared" who tried to investigate
3) Refuses to obey FOIA laws claiming that it is a private institution, but claims sovereign immunity to protect itself from civil suits from its victims

Typical misdirection technique from a Farker who will happily defend "good and noble public education" no matter what abuses it may commit.
 
2012-01-30 10:10:56 AM  

feefifofimmy: FormlessOne: treecologist: Jake Havechek: Paterno was an enabler, I hope he's digging ditches in Hell right now.

Hyperbole is fun.

You are really good at it. Keep going.

How is "stating the truth" equivalent to "hyperbole"? Paterno knew what was going on.

This article, from the days immediately after the scandal hit the national media, is full of nonsense. It proves nothing about what Paterno knew. For example, the sentence "Joe Paterno bears responsibility for all of the children that Jerry Sandusky sexually assaulted" is just nonsense and can be repudiated because it is essentially reductio ad absurdum.

Furthermore, there is actual evidence that Attorney General, now Governor, Tom Corbett DID know what was going on and chose to do nothing for purely political reasons (new window).


Yeah, he only ran the investigation that lead to the indictment and stopped talking because he legally had to once he was elected governor. Clearly he was in on the whole thing and had a vendetta against poor, poor JoePa. It had nothing to do to make sure that he had an air tight case against a very powerful individual who had the backing of a very slippery and powerful institution.

/keep playing interference for your beloved Pedo State
//Jerry Sandusky has far more Alts than I would have ever guessed
 
2012-01-30 10:12:14 AM  

Ennuipoet: FTA: "Sodomy, rape and anal intercourse are not easy words for men, especially jocks, to verbalize..."

And yet references to such acts are such a large part of their witty repartee.


Oh its just a bit of hazing. All jocks and frats have a little welcome to the team buttsex.
 
2012-01-30 10:15:02 AM  

beta_plus: feefifofimmy: FormlessOne: treecologist: Jake Havechek: Paterno was an enabler, I hope he's digging ditches in Hell right now.

Hyperbole is fun.

You are really good at it. Keep going.

How is "stating the truth" equivalent to "hyperbole"? Paterno knew what was going on.

This article, from the days immediately after the scandal hit the national media, is full of nonsense. It proves nothing about what Paterno knew. For example, the sentence "Joe Paterno bears responsibility for all of the children that Jerry Sandusky sexually assaulted" is just nonsense and can be repudiated because it is essentially reductio ad absurdum.

Furthermore, there is actual evidence that Attorney General, now Governor, Tom Corbett DID know what was going on and chose to do nothing for purely political reasons (new window).

Yeah, he only ran the investigation that lead to the indictment and stopped talking because he legally had to once he was elected governor. Clearly he was in on the whole thing and had a vendetta against poor, poor JoePa. It had nothing to do to make sure that he had an air tight case against a very powerful individual who had the backing of a very slippery and powerful institution.

/keep playing interference for your beloved Pedo State
//Jerry Sandusky has far more Alts than I would have ever guessed


No, you're wrong about that. The investigation was not started until after he became governor. It was started by his successor. Have all the opinion that you want. But get the facts straight.
 
2012-01-30 10:23:34 AM  

feefifofimmy: beta_plus: feefifofimmy: FormlessOne: treecologist: Jake Havechek: Paterno was an enabler, I hope he's digging ditches in Hell right now.

Hyperbole is fun.

You are really good at it. Keep going.

How is "stating the truth" equivalent to "hyperbole"? Paterno knew what was going on.

This article, from the days immediately after the scandal hit the national media, is full of nonsense. It proves nothing about what Paterno knew. For example, the sentence "Joe Paterno bears responsibility for all of the children that Jerry Sandusky sexually assaulted" is just nonsense and can be repudiated because it is essentially reductio ad absurdum.

Furthermore, there is actual evidence that Attorney General, now Governor, Tom Corbett DID know what was going on and chose to do nothing for purely political reasons (new window).

Yeah, he only ran the investigation that lead to the indictment and stopped talking because he legally had to once he was elected governor. Clearly he was in on the whole thing and had a vendetta against poor, poor JoePa. It had nothing to do to make sure that he had an air tight case against a very powerful individual who had the backing of a very slippery and powerful institution.

/keep playing interference for your beloved Pedo State
//Jerry Sandusky has far more Alts than I would have ever guessed

No, you're wrong about that. The investigation was not started until after he became governor. It was started by his successor. Have all the opinion that you want. But get the facts straight.


Look Jerry, I think you may be losing your marbles in your old age.

The Grand Jury investigation began in 2008 (new window). Who was the AG of PA in 2008?
 
2012-01-30 10:27:12 AM  
WE ARE
 
2012-01-30 10:30:49 AM  

beta_plus: Look Jerry, I think you may be losing your marbles in your old age.

The Grand Jury investigation began in 2008 (new window). Who was the AG of PA in 2008?


I dont know...could it be
www.boxturtlebulletin.com
SATAN?!?!?
 
2012-01-30 10:49:02 AM  

beta_plus: feefifofimmy: beta_plus: feefifofimmy: FormlessOne: treecologist: Jake Havechek: Paterno was an enabler, I hope he's digging ditches in Hell right now.

Hyperbole is fun.

You are really good at it. Keep going.

How is "stating the truth" equivalent to "hyperbole"? Paterno knew what was going on.

This article, from the days immediately after the scandal hit the national media, is full of nonsense. It proves nothing about what Paterno knew. For example, the sentence "Joe Paterno bears responsibility for all of the children that Jerry Sandusky sexually assaulted" is just nonsense and can be repudiated because it is essentially reductio ad absurdum.

Furthermore, there is actual evidence that Attorney General, now Governor, Tom Corbett DID know what was going on and chose to do nothing for purely political reasons (new window).

Yeah, he only ran the investigation that lead to the indictment and stopped talking because he legally had to once he was elected governor. Clearly he was in on the whole thing and had a vendetta against poor, poor JoePa. It had nothing to do to make sure that he had an air tight case against a very powerful individual who had the backing of a very slippery and powerful institution.

/keep playing interference for your beloved Pedo State
//Jerry Sandusky has far more Alts than I would have ever guessed

No, you're wrong about that. The investigation was not started until after he became governor. It was started by his successor. Have all the opinion that you want. But get the facts straight.

Look Jerry, I think you may be losing your marbles in your old age.

The Grand Jury investigation began in 2008 (new window). Who was the AG of PA in 2008?


Pennsylvania grand juries are disbanded after 18 months. The grand jury (33rd) that handed down the indictments was formed in 2011. The previous GJ (30th) heard testimony in December 2010 but was disbanded at the end of January 2011.

The PA AG office did not investigate in 2008. They received complaints but chose not to act. One speculation is that Corbett, who decided to run for governor, didn't want to piss off PSU alumni voters, plus, he received a $25,000 campaign contribution from Second Mile.

Corbett associates point out that AG Corbett had every opportunity to pursue the investigation for a year and a half. For example, AG Corbett could simply have assigned the 2008-2009 Sandusky complaint(s) to the AG office's Child Predator Unit, which would have been a normal and logical course of action for a case like this.

And it was Corbett who led the charge for the BoT to fire Paterno. At the moment of the vote to fire Paterno, Corbett allegedly said over the speakerphone, "Remember that little boy in the shower." The same little boy that he knew about for years and about whom he did nothing.

I'll also note that Curley and Schultz no doubt effed up their responsibilities. Spanier hid the seriousness of the matter from the Penn State BoT, who apparently don't read the newspaper.
 
2012-01-30 11:09:12 AM  

feefifofimmy: The PA AG office did not investigate in 2008. They received complaints but chose not to act. One speculation is that Corbett, who decided to run for governor, didn't want to piss off PSU alumni voters, plus, he received a $25,000 campaign contribution from Second Mile.


Second Mile took donations from people to help kids...then re-donated the money to a political campaign? Is that normal in Happy Valley?
 
2012-01-30 11:15:44 AM  

mikaloyd: feefifofimmy: The PA AG office did not investigate in 2008. They received complaints but chose not to act. One speculation is that Corbett, who decided to run for governor, didn't want to piss off PSU alumni voters, plus, he received a $25,000 campaign contribution from Second Mile.

Second Mile took donations from people to help kids...then re-donated the money to a political campaign? Is that normal in Happy Valley?


First, let it be established that Second Mile != Penn State in the least. Second, while it may not be "normal," it certainly did happen. And I agree that it's bad.
 
2012-01-30 11:24:28 AM  

feefifofimmy: First, let it be established that Second Mile != Penn State in the least.


Now they have gone their separate ways of course. I would imagine that donations are down this year too. There was a time though that both entities were so proud of one another that the each bragged of it regularly. Second mile was embedded in Penn State as deeply as Sandusky was imbedded into...well you get the picture.
 
2012-01-30 11:44:45 AM  
Penn State, being a State University (that has somehow managed to legally free itself recently from the horror of Freedom of Information and Right to Know obligations) could not ethically donate to a political party or candidate in Pennsylvania. On the other hand Penn State is reliant upon State funding and could not afford to snub politicians. So I suppose that before Penn State quit reporting to the public, it almost had to have plausible entities set up as slush funds for political donations and sundry what-have-yous that Penn Stae would not be proud of.

I wonder if Second Mile was such an entity? It would explain a hell of a lot of the things that dont make sense otherwise. When you see a seral child rapist being protected and hidden and enabled by an institution at all levels from janitor to coaches to law enforcement to the president, well it makes you wonder where the money trail is
 
2012-01-30 12:27:18 PM  
Ok, I'm not gonna lie...this thread made me chortle
 
2012-01-30 12:56:03 PM  
Gricar story (new window)
 
2012-01-30 12:57:28 PM  

feefifofimmy: beta_plus: feefifofimmy: beta_plus: feefifofimmy: FormlessOne: treecologist: Jake Havechek: Paterno was an enabler, I hope he's digging ditches in Hell right now.

Hyperbole is fun.

You are really good at it. Keep going.

How is "stating the truth" equivalent to "hyperbole"? Paterno knew what was going on.

This article, from the days immediately after the scandal hit the national media, is full of nonsense. It proves nothing about what Paterno knew. For example, the sentence "Joe Paterno bears responsibility for all of the children that Jerry Sandusky sexually assaulted" is just nonsense and can be repudiated because it is essentially reductio ad absurdum.

Furthermore, there is actual evidence that Attorney General, now Governor, Tom Corbett DID know what was going on and chose to do nothing for purely political reasons (new window).

Yeah, he only ran the investigation that lead to the indictment and stopped talking because he legally had to once he was elected governor. Clearly he was in on the whole thing and had a vendetta against poor, poor JoePa. It had nothing to do to make sure that he had an air tight case against a very powerful individual who had the backing of a very slippery and powerful institution.

/keep playing interference for your beloved Pedo State
//Jerry Sandusky has far more Alts than I would have ever guessed

No, you're wrong about that. The investigation was not started until after he became governor. It was started by his successor. Have all the opinion that you want. But get the facts straight.

Look Jerry, I think you may be losing your marbles in your old age.

The Grand Jury investigation began in 2008 (new window). Who was the AG of PA in 2008?

Pennsylvania grand juries are disbanded after 18 months. The grand jury (33rd) that handed down the indictments was formed in 2011. The previous GJ (30th) heard testimony in December 2010 but was disbanded at the end of January 2011.

The PA AG office did not investigate in 2008. They recei ...


Maybe, just maybe, it took them this long because getting a conviction on testimony alone is damn difficult. But clearly the AG of PA in Harrisburg was pulling the Machiavellian strings behind the whole things, while poor JoePa was his unwitting victm.

/JoePa apologists are worse the Truthers and Birthers
 
2012-01-30 01:05:13 PM  

beta_plus: /JoePa apologists are worse the Truthers and Birthers


QFT
 
2012-01-30 01:44:32 PM  

treecologist: Ad hominem AND hyperbole. Two of the most important Fark debate techniques. Pretty good but you can do better; you are still missing a few. Keep going.


You forgot False Dichotomy. That is usually the pinnacle of poor arguments!

Let's start with:

I_C_Weener: Either Paterno knew or he was grossly incompetent.


Cause there are no other options, right? No options like "He wasn't told the whole truth", "He did follow-up and we don't know about it", "He was lied to", or "He just didn't believe the allegation." Regardless of how likely or unlikely, there are more than "Willful ignorance and incompetent".

How about:

beta_plus: Refuses to obey FOIA laws claiming that it is a private institution, but claims sovereign immunity to protect itself from civil suits from its victims


No third option, such as "PSU is a land-grant institution, which is both/neither public and/nor private." It is the best/worst of both worlds (depending on which side you are on when you need something).

Whenever I see an argument that boils down to an "either/or" statement, I know the poster is an idiot and pretty much has no sense of logical argument or grasp of the facts to back up his statements.
 
2012-01-30 03:31:43 PM  

FormlessOne: beta_plus: /JoePa apologists are worse the Truthers and Birthers

QFT


Penn State is Best State!

/why you no worship joepa? why?
 
2012-01-30 03:36:16 PM  
Whatever helps you sleep at night...wearing PSU footie pajamas.
 
2012-01-30 04:43:38 PM  

abmoraz: beta_plus: Refuses to obey FOIA laws claiming that it is a private institution, but claims sovereign immunity to protect itself from civil suits from its victims

No third option, such as "PSU is a land-grant institution, which is both/neither public and/nor private." It is the best/worst of both worlds (depending on which side you are on when you need something).

Whenever I see an argument that boils down to an "either/or" statement, I know the poster is an idiot and pretty much has no sense of logical argument or grasp of the facts to back up his statements.


Don't want to obey FOIA laws? Then don't accept government money. You and JoePa made your bed. Now you have to lie in it. Oh, and try not to take any 10 year old boys with you this time. I know that you consider yourselves the intellectual successors to the great philosophers of ancient Greece, but you're taking a little too far.
 
2012-01-30 05:09:40 PM  

Two Dogs Farking: I thought it was a chocolate starfish?


That was for the "Limp Bizkit"
 
2012-01-30 07:53:47 PM  
Of course he didn't get detailed, he'd probably get hard going into detail and that would just be embarrassing.
 
2012-01-30 11:03:43 PM  
"Foxtrot Uniform Charlie Kilo (new window)", Bloodhound Gang (Link goes to a possibly NSFW YouTube video for the song)

Vulcanize the whoopee stick
In the ham wallet

Cattle prod the oyster ditch
With the lap rocket

Batter dip the cranny ax
In the gut locker

Retrofit the pudding hatch
Ooh la la
With the boink swatter

If I get you in the loop when I make a point to be straight with you then
In lieu of the innuendo in the end know my intent though
I brazillian wax poetic so hypothetically
I don't wanna beat around the bush

Foxtrot Unifrom Charlie Kilo
Foxtrot Uniform Charlie Kilo

Marinate the nether rod
In the squish mitten

Power drill the yippee bog
With the dude piston

Pressure wash the quiver bone
In the biatch wrinkle

Cannonball the fiddle cove
Ooh la la
With the pork steeple

If I get you in the loop when I make a point to be straight with you then
In lieu of the innuendo in the end know my intent though
I brazillian wax poetic so hypothetically
I don't wanna beat around the bush

Foxtrot Unifrom Charlie Kilo
Foxtrot Uniform Charlie Kilo

Put the you know what in the you know where
Put the you know what in the you know where
Put the you know what in the you know where
Put the you know what in the you know where pronto
 
2012-01-31 04:18:10 PM  

beta_plus: abmoraz: beta_plus: Refuses to obey FOIA laws claiming that it is a private institution, but claims sovereign immunity to protect itself from civil suits from its victims

No third option, such as "PSU is a land-grant institution, which is both/neither public and/nor private." It is the best/worst of both worlds (depending on which side you are on when you need something).

Whenever I see an argument that boils down to an "either/or" statement, I know the poster is an idiot and pretty much has no sense of logical argument or grasp of the facts to back up his statements.

Don't want to obey FOIA laws? Then don't accept government money. You and JoePa made your bed. Now you have to lie in it. Oh, and try not to take any 10 year old boys with you this time. I know that you consider yourselves the intellectual successors to the great philosophers of ancient Greece, but you're taking a little too far.


Well I appreciate the effort, you do continuously prove my points with your strawman, false dichotomy, ad hominem and hyperbole attacks all in one. Kudos for the effort.

Strawman: I do not support child abuse, but you misrepresent my support for due process as tacit approval in order to attack that strawman.
Ad homimem: I am a PSU alumnus, therefore you assume that I have something to do with little boys.
False Dichotomy: Still wrongly adhering to the "If you take federal money, you are subject to FOIA." Ask anyone on Social Security or Disability pay if they will give you their budgets and tax returns. Also, sticking with the "Either you hate PSU, Joe Paterno, and/or due process or you rape children" fallacy.
Hyperbole: Stretching my argument of "you use false logic and faulty debate techniques" into an exaggerated metaphor about ancient Greeks that is no longer relavent to the discussion at hand.

All in all, 2.5/10
You tried, but need to work on your execution and your target audience. No real rage induced, just mostly a "meh, boredom" response.

/He who yells loudest is not automatically the winner.
 
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