FARK.com: (6908799) George Washington may have been America's first president, but was he nearly America's first zombie-in-chief?

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		George Washington may have been America's first president, but was he nearly America's first zombie-in-chief? (io9.com)		44
		More: Scary, U S Capitol, George Washington, Dr. Frankenstein, experimental design, British Medical Journal, University of Edinburgh

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15662 clicks; posted to Main » on 29 Jan 2012 at 2:40 AM | Favorite | share:

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44 Comments (+0 »)

View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest

GAT_00

2012-01-28 11:58:38 PM

NO.

Now fark off with your retarded Zombie fascination. It's played out and it was a long time ago.

SnarfVader

2012-01-29 12:06:38 AM

GAT_00: NO.

Now fark off with your retarded Zombie fascination. It's played out and it was a long time ago.

If only there were a word for bringing something supposedly dead, like this meme, back to life...

GAT_00

2012-01-29 12:09:12 AM

SnarfVader: GAT_00: NO.

Now fark off with your retarded Zombie fascination. It's played out and it was a long time ago.

If only there were a word for bringing something supposedly dead, like this meme, back to life...

A crutch for those limited in creativity for their story?

Wait, that's not a single word.

SnarfVader

2012-01-29 12:14:27 AM

GAT_00: SnarfVader: GAT_00: NO.

Now fark off with your retarded Zombie fascination. It's played out and it was a long time ago.

If only there were a word for bringing something supposedly dead, like this meme, back to life...

A crutch for those limited in creativity for their story?

Wait, that's not a single word.

Resurrection.

DarthBrooks

2012-01-29 12:27:10 AM

I thought the reanimation business actually happened with John Adams's wife. What was her name? Abby... something.

www.winomagazine.com

cptjeff

2012-01-29 12:40:41 AM

Yeah, that tomb in the capitol wasn't exactly secret. It never happened because he died before it was finished, and while Martha said that they could move him there if she could go too, it still wasn't finished when she died. By the time it WAS finished, the state of Virginia and Washington's heirs told them to fark off.

The tomb is there, and empty. But unlike TFA claims, it was never secret. If you go to the capitol today, your tour guide should point it out.

JasonOfOrillia

2012-01-29 02:44:53 AM

Frankenstein's monster is the better comparison for this story.

And Philip Syng Physick as the name of a physician? Sounds made up to me. That or he came from a long line of physicians.

Bonanza Jellybean

2012-01-29 02:44:57 AM

anuran

2012-01-29 02:50:37 AM

"I regret that I have but one life and undeath to give to my country"

urban.derelict

2012-01-29 02:52:26 AM

wallywam1

2012-01-29 02:55:28 AM

anuran: "I regret that I have but one life and undeath to give to my country"

You regret that you have no tail to give to your country.

twomutts

2012-01-29 02:56:03 AM

Wow, could this story be placed in a worse position? If you don't know what I mean, go back to the main page and read the title directly below this one. Ouch. Welcome to FARK, I guess!

FlyingJ

2012-01-29 03:10:01 AM

GAT_00 It's played out and it was a long time ago.

Yup, 1799. Can't eat human flesh with wooden teeth. I expect to see you again in the bacon & Betty White threads

Sarah Palin's Conscience

2012-01-29 03:12:31 AM

GAT_00: NO.

Now fark off with your retarded Zombie fascination. It's played out and it was a long time ago.

Are vampires still cool, O Approver of People's Interests?

Vern

2012-01-29 03:16:52 AM

And Zombie Nixon wins again!
i229.photobucket.com

And predictably, Cthulhu Putin is drinking again.
i229.photobucket.com

batcookie

2012-01-29 03:17:02 AM

GAT_00 is clearly a golem who is just bitter because the zombies get all the attention.

vice_magnet

2012-01-29 03:19:14 AM

So *that's* where "Die Hard" came from!

Natsumi

2012-01-29 03:24:40 AM

batcookie: GAT_00 is clearly a golem who is just bitter because the zombies get all the attention.

hihi!

jenny next

2012-01-29 03:36:15 AM

Zombie Washington? You should read Bentley Little's short story The Washingtonians (in his book The Collection)

Not exactly a zombie but a very sinister George

Crudbucket

2012-01-29 03:50:15 AM

twomutts: Wow, could this story be placed in a worse position? If you don't know what I mean, go back to the main page and read the title directly below this one. Ouch. Welcome to FARK, I guess!

It's only poorly placed if that other submitter had to stop the doctors from feeding his dad human flesh, and if that's the case he should have stopped them a lot longer ago than just tonight.

GungFu

2012-01-29 03:59:47 AM

xen0blue

2012-01-29 04:07:12 AM

GAT_00: NO.

Now fark off with your retarded Zombie fascination. It's played out and it was a long time ago.

THIS THIS THIS THIS

Mr. Potatoass

2012-01-29 04:25:06 AM

I often wake up in a cold sweat due to a recurring nightmare featuring zombie Ed McMahon, and William Howard Taft.

Coelacanth

2012-01-29 04:29:43 AM

I'm one of the biggest zombie buffs here on Fark and I'm getting a little tired of the whole thing.

Bathia_Mapes

2012-01-29 04:30:56 AM

jenny next: Zombie Washington? You should read Bentley Little's short story The Washingtonians (in his book The Collection)

Not exactly a zombie but a very sinister George

The used his story for an episode of "Masters of Horror" too.

Enigmamf

2012-01-29 04:43:20 AM

Mr. Potatoass: I often wake up in a cold sweat due to a recurring nightmare featuring zombie Ed McMahon, and William Howard Taft.

Does it involve a bathtub? :-o

Mr. Potatoass

2012-01-29 05:20:10 AM

Enigmamf: Mr. Potatoass: I often wake up in a cold sweat due to a recurring nightmare featuring zombie Ed McMahon, and William Howard Taft.

Does it involve a bathtub? :-o

My initial post was somewhat embellished.
I did have a dream where I was being chased by a naked Ed McMahon,
and I substituted William Howard Taft for Burl Ives to make it somewhat relevant to the thread.

johnson442

2012-01-29 06:03:51 AM

Mr. Potatoass: Enigmamf: Mr. Potatoass: I often wake up in a cold sweat due to a recurring nightmare featuring zombie Ed McMahon, and William Howard Taft.

Does it involve a bathtub? :-o

My initial post was somewhat embellished.
I did have a dream where I was being chased by a naked Ed McMahon,
and I substituted William Howard Taft for Burl Ives to make it somewhat relevant to the thread.

O.o

Dude........

Mr. Potatoass

2012-01-29 06:21:56 AM

johnson442: Mr. Potatoass: Enigmamf: Mr. Potatoass: I often wake up in a cold sweat due to a recurring nightmare featuring zombie Ed McMahon, and William Howard Taft.

Does it involve a bathtub? :-o

My initial post was somewhat embellished.
I did have a dream where I was being chased by a naked Ed McMahon,
and I substituted William Howard Taft for Burl Ives to make it somewhat relevant to the thread.

O.o

Dude........

LOL

If I had the wherewithal to post the subtle details of my "Being chased by a naked Ed McMahon" dream, the page couldn't contain it. It happened 20+ years ago when I fell asleep, loaded, with a Publishers Clearinghouse ad playing on the TV. My friends still laugh their asses off about it to this day.

That said, here's Burl in a bathtub:

lh4.ggpht.com

medius

2012-01-29 08:12:18 AM

Undead Presidents

casual disregard

2012-01-29 08:18:14 AM

SnarfVader: GAT_00: SnarfVader: GAT_00: NO.

Now fark off with your retarded Zombie fascination. It's played out and it was a long time ago.

If only there were a word for bringing something supposedly dead, like this meme, back to life...

A crutch for those limited in creativity for their story?

Wait, that's not a single word.

Resurrection.

Necromancy.

medius

2012-01-29 08:26:44 AM

casual disregard: SnarfVader: GAT_00: SnarfVader: GAT_00: NO.

Now fark off with your retarded Zombie fascination. It's played out and it was a long time ago.

If only there were a word for bringing something supposedly dead, like this meme, back to life...

A crutch for those limited in creativity for their story?

Wait, that's not a single word.

Resurrection.

Necromancy.

Shuttlecock.

NIXON YOU DOLT!!!!!

2012-01-29 08:46:36 AM

medius: casual disregard: SnarfVader: GAT_00: SnarfVader: GAT_00: NO.

Now fark off with your retarded Zombie fascination. It's played out and it was a long time ago.

If only there were a word for bringing something supposedly dead, like this meme, back to life...

A crutch for those limited in creativity for their story?

Wait, that's not a single word.

Resurrection.

Necromancy.

Shuttlecock.

Boobs.

Abox

2012-01-29 09:50:00 AM

Clearly.

ElFugawz

2012-01-29 10:07:22 AM

Could it have gone any worse than lincoln?

maxx2112

2012-01-29 10:35:42 AM

George Washington may have been America's first president, but was he nearly America's first zombie-in-chief?

Next, on Sick Sad World!

favim.com

Gleeman

2012-01-29 10:41:41 AM

So, Reagan was still first then?

404 page not found

2012-01-29 11:52:26 AM

Abox: [farm8.staticflickr.com image 335x315]

Clearly.

He eats opponents brains and invented cocaine.

Cosmic Crab

2012-01-29 01:19:43 PM

I'm just re-reading H. P. Lovecraft's Herbert West--Reanimator, so I'm getting a kick out of this story.

Packersfan823

2012-01-29 02:36:05 PM

Obligatory:
i106.photobucket.com

scallywaghotness

2012-01-29 03:04:50 PM

404 page not found: Abox: [farm8.staticflickr.com image 335x315]

Clearly.

He eats opponents brains and invented cocaine.

I heard that motherfarker had like, 30 goddamn dicks.

mrsdish

2012-01-29 05:49:12 PM

maxx2112: George Washington may have been America's first president, but was he nearly America's first zombie-in-chief?

Next, on Sick Sad World!

[favim.com image 500x374]

That's what I thought too!

404 page not found

2012-01-29 08:05:33 PM

scallywaghotness: 404 page not found: Abox: [farm8.staticflickr.com image 335x315]

Clearly.

He eats opponents brains and invented cocaine.

I heard that motherfarker had like, 30 goddamn dicks.

i.huffpost.com