The hyphen key is right between "0" and "=" on your keyboard, submitter.

The school only wants to protect 'em,
But there was no need to reject 'em.
Though shabbily done,
The clip was in fun.
So they need to loosen their rectum.

I've got a headache from trying to figure out what the fark subby was trying to say.

English, m*ther-f*cker! Do you speak it?!

Purple monkey dishwasher?

Also, that was a shiatty video. Mainly because Deadspin decided the youtube player wasn't good enough so they put the Youtube video inside their video player.

[yodawg.jpg]

Subby,


Mr. Jackson would like a word with you

Headline made my head hurt and almost explode.

I wonder if Joe Satriani got paid for that video.

So I wasn't the only one here that read the headline three times before giving up and clicking on the link?

pricipal caught sayof

Looks like Subby ran out of verbs and just chucked the remaining nouns into a pile for the reader to sort out.

I hear the awful German language does this frequently, especially when a German professor has anything to do with it. They're famously absent-minded and willfully obscure. They'll write a sentence with many clauses and sub-clauses, and then chuck all the verbs in at the very end, as an after-thought.

Like Yoda sounds, it does.

That's where Lucas that bit stole he did.

You get much neater constructions in Latin, where they stick clauses in between subject and object or whereever, so you can unpack them at your leisure. But then Latin is a declined language, so you usually have a good idea which word is the subject, which the object, and where the other bits go once you have sorted them out grammatically. The Latin speakers and writers do tend to leave things out--sometimes the verb, sometimes the pronouns, etc., but they are much clearer than Germans. Also, Latin has no word for "yes" or "no". Thus, you get a sort of paraphrase, which is often translated "verily" in old timey English.

Ita est. Lo, verily, it is so.

Here is my translation of Subby's English, before looking at the article:

The Catholic University in Chicago is not happy with the athletic recruitment video they commissioned. The bizarre production shows a baseball obliterating a cartoon moon. Futurama did it in their parody of a famously artsy and obscure commercial in "That Eighties Guy" episode.

Did I get it? Soon to know, will I.

Yep. Nailed it.

Except for one fly in the ointment: the real story here isn't the bizarre bit with the baseball obliterating the Moon (although that could be construed as sacrilege, at least by Moon-worshippers) but the fact that the volleyball that was spiked through the Earth obliterated a Chinese pagoda. Since a pagoda is a Chinese temple, some Catholics and others might feel that it is inappropriate for Benedictine monks to show a Catholic University team destroying a temple.

Was I the only one to read the article? Did everybody go with lambasting Subby on his or her punctuation?

Hang your heads in shame. You missed the real story.

By the way, I am very offended when people damage the Moon. They know who they are (cough, cough, Pinheads) and intentionally damaging the Moon (cough, cough CHAirface, cough, cough) is even worse.

So let the Moon alone. She's a beauty just as she is. Whether you see a Man in the Moon, a rabbit jumping over a Bush, a copy of a famous Impressionist painting, or the Egyptian goddes of the Moon with kohl enhancing her eyes like Queen Nerfertiti, she is a grand old Moon.

Hands off! This means you, America! And China too!

Of course, you can give the Moon a poke in the eye from time to time if he deserves it. That silly old Moon on The Mighty Boosh gets on my nerves sometimes.

She walks in beauty like the night.

If you must play the video, I recommend that you minimize the window and just bask in the phenomenal musicianship of Joe Satriani.

Well, Benedictine University may have sports programs covered but they are clearly lacking a video production department.