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(USA Today) Unlikely The CDC would like you to know BIRD FLU IS COMING AND YOU'RE NOT SCARED ENOUGH   (usatoday.com) divider line 44
More: Unlikely, United States National Academy of Sciences, avian influenza, H5N1 virus, University of Wisconsin-Madison, Richard Feynman, animal models, Manhattan Project, biology  
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2581 clicks; posted to Main » on 26 Jan 2012 at 12:05 PM   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»   |    Get this fabulous T-Shirt and impress the methane out of your friends! shirt it!



44 Comments   (+0 »)
   
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest
 
RexTalionis [TotalFark]
2012-01-26 08:44:18 AM
Meh. We all gotta go somehow.
 
The Stealth Hippopotamus [TotalFark]
2012-01-26 09:37:59 AM
RexTalionis: Meh. We all gotta go somehow.

Its better then encephalitis
 
elvisaintdead [TotalFark]
2012-01-26 09:53:40 AM
Somebody get Frankie MacDonald on this, stat. *cough*
 
MaxxLarge [TotalFark]
2012-01-26 12:04:32 PM
It's not that I'm doubting the merit
Of "end of days" doom we'll inherit.
But I thought the source
Would ride a dark horse.
Instead? It will come on a parrot.
 
netweavr
2012-01-26 12:06:51 PM
Pfft just infect the Birds with the Mexican Flu and let them wipe each other out.
 
The My Little Pony Killer [TotalFark]
2012-01-26 12:08:04 PM
"Tickling the dragon's tail" sounds like the name of a sex act.
 
J. Frank Parnell
2012-01-26 12:09:27 PM
Tamiflu stock must have fallen a few points.
 
RickN99
2012-01-26 12:10:05 PM
Damn. We just finished burying the millions of unvaccinated dead from the last flu. I wonder if this one will also be exceptionally virulent and deadly, especially to the young and healthy.

On an unrelated note, when does the CDC make their pitch for their share of the 2013 budget?
 
raygundan
2012-01-26 12:10:25 PM
I'm appropriately scared. It's the flu, so it will probably kill ten or twenty times as many people as 9/11 this year-- which is why I fully support some sort of TSA-like organization to inspect the bodily fluids of everyone who ever leaves their hermetically-sealed houses.
 
Minimally Hairy Beer-Powered Simian
2012-01-26 12:12:49 PM
I got my flu shot late last year.....hopefully that's enough. If not, then I'll get whatever other shot the CDC recommends.

\excuse me while I don't give a damn
 
meat0918 [TotalFark]
2012-01-26 12:12:57 PM
Nope, no panic here.

Some small part of me really hopes for a serious disease that will wake people up to the dangers of not vaccinating.

Then I feel really bad, because I don't want to see people suffer and die just to make a point, unlike Jenny McCarthy wants with polio.

And I am really, REALLY worried that when all the men, women, and equipment return home from Afghanistan, we'll be bringing back polio as well.
 
ToastTheRabbit
2012-01-26 12:14:10 PM
The My Little Pony Killer: "Tickling the dragon's tail" sounds like the name of a sex act.

Rule 34 GO!

/cant link to pictures due to work firewall
//google that phrase.
 
toraque [TotalFark]
2012-01-26 12:16:01 PM
FTA:

"I'm not convinced a 'doomsday' strain is what we have here," says NSABB chief Paul Keim, an anthrax researcher at Northern Arizona University in Flagstaff, "but now at this point, we can see the trajectory creating something of very grave concern. M-O-O-N, that spells Concern.'
 
neversubmit
2012-01-26 12:16:57 PM
In Vietnam, Cambodia, China, Indonesia, yes, just Google "bird flu deaths".

FTFA: "a pandemic could kill 20 million to 150 million people worldwide" and I could gain superpowers.
 
unsungzeros
2012-01-26 12:20:41 PM
The CDC sensationalist media would like you to know BIRD FLU IS COMING AND YOU'RE NOT SCARED ENOUGH

FTFY

/Epidemiologist
 
unsungzeros
2012-01-26 12:23:44 PM
unsungzeros: The CDCsensationalist media would like you to know BIRD FLU IS COMING AND YOU'RE NOT SCARED ENOUGH

FTFY

/Epidemiologist
Fixed.
 
dennysgod
2012-01-26 12:26:20 PM
RexTalionis: Meh. We all gotta go somehow.

Yeah, but I'd rather it not be something stupid like the flu.

A parachute not opening now that's a way to die. Getting caught in the gears of a combine or having your nuts bit off by a Laplander, that's the way I wanna go.
 
born_yesterday
2012-01-26 12:26:41 PM
If The Stand taught me anything, its that when I see people dying from an illness and the government is denying that illness exists, THAT'S when I should be worried.

OK CDC, we're panicked. We're out of our minds frightened. We're within one more report of storming the hospitals for antibiotics, and killing anyone who gets in our way.

Now what?

/yes, antibiotics. OMG IT'S GOTTA WORK BETTER THAN NOTHING!
 
timujin [TotalFark]
2012-01-26 12:32:21 PM
Do you have any idea how many "if it escaped the lab we'd all be doomed" viruses there are out there? That's why there are protocols for this sort of thing.

Not amused:
encrypted-tbn3.google.com
 
Voiceofreason01
2012-01-26 12:36:02 PM
I already don't pick up dead birds that I find on the ground, I already try not to cough on strangers, I wash my hands occasionally and work has a pandemic preparedness plan from the last time we were supposed to be scared of the bird flu. What the fark else am I supposed to do?
 
timujin [TotalFark]
2012-01-26 12:37:18 PM
dennysgod: RexTalionis: Meh. We all gotta go somehow.

Yeah, but I'd rather it not be something stupid like the flu.

A parachute not opening now that's a way to die. Getting caught in the gears of a combine or having your nuts bit off by a Laplander, that's the way I wanna go.

My friends used to get a laugh from changing the words to STP's song:

I'm half the man I used to be
Got my legs stuck in the threshing machine
 
Committee_For_Aesthetic_Deletions
2012-01-26 12:42:36 PM
I'm pannicking because for me, the bird flu is coming FROM INSIDE THE HOUSE (new window)!!

/my little green buddy
 
RexTalionis [TotalFark]
2012-01-26 12:44:25 PM
dennysgod: RexTalionis: Meh. We all gotta go somehow.

Yeah, but I'd rather it not be something stupid like the flu.

A parachute not opening now that's a way to die. Getting caught in the gears of a combine or having your nuts bit off by a Laplander, that's the way I wanna go.

Dead is dead. Doesn't matter how you come to it.
 
RexTalionis [TotalFark]
2012-01-26 12:45:38 PM
RexTalionis: dennysgod: RexTalionis: Meh. We all gotta go somehow.

Yeah, but I'd rather it not be something stupid like the flu.

A parachute not opening now that's a way to die. Getting caught in the gears of a combine or having your nuts bit off by a Laplander, that's the way I wanna go.

Dead is dead. Doesn't matter how you come to it.

Frankly, I'd prefer not to have my body to be completely damaged when I go. I've got plans for it.
 
Crotchrocket Slim
2012-01-26 12:46:41 PM
unsungzeros: The CDC sensationalist media would like you to know BIRD FLU IS COMING AND YOU'RE NOT SCARED ENOUGH

FTFY

/Epidemiologist

No shiat, why can't people see that the hyper-obsessive, super-obnoxious media does this with everything they cover? I don't see how adults could blame the CDC when it's the media saturating us all with repeat messages all saying the same things.
 
genner
2012-01-26 12:48:49 PM
RexTalionis: dennysgod: RexTalionis: Meh. We all gotta go somehow.

Yeah, but I'd rather it not be something stupid like the flu.

A parachute not opening now that's a way to die. Getting caught in the gears of a combine or having your nuts bit off by a Laplander, that's the way I wanna go.

Dead is dead. Doesn't matter how you come to it.

Well there's dead and then there's the years of pain and diminished capacity that come from some diseases.
So yeah there's somethings I'd rather not die of.

imgs.xkcd.com
 
JRoo
2012-01-26 12:51:14 PM
Yeah really.

The media is going to make it so, if there's a real epidemic and people start dropping like flies and everybody has to stay home in quarantine, nobody is going to believe it at first because they say the bird/swine flu is coming every six months so they can sell more fizzy vitamin-c tablets or whatever.
 
Gabrin_Kinoda
2012-01-26 12:52:29 PM
Meh. I've been sick since Halloween. It can't be any worse that what I've been through over the past three months.


/love my kids, but in the winter, they're just walking talking contagion-carriers...
 
generallyso
2012-01-26 01:10:13 PM

You say CDC but you mean "media outlets whose income is determined by the size of their audience" hence headlines like

Has bird flu biology opened bioterror box?


I'm pretty sure that was written by Dan Vergano of USA TODAY rather than the CDC.
 
Private_Citizen
2012-01-26 01:10:42 PM
Gabrin_Kinoda: Meh. I've been sick since Halloween. It can't be any worse that what I've been through over the past three months.


/love my kids, but in the winter, they're just walking talking contagion-carriers...

Petri dishes. It's like anything that they encounter, they take a sample, grow it to maturity - then share.
 
Jurodan
2012-01-26 01:22:18 PM
Still FAR more worried about the potential for drug immune TB. Remember, while Bird Flue could cause an epidemic, Tuberculosis already kills 18 million people a year...
 
Slaves2Darkness
2012-01-26 01:40:30 PM
Coming over? Dam it I don't have enough snacks.

Meh we need a good plague to wipe away the pestelance that is China.
 
timujin [TotalFark]
2012-01-26 01:48:48 PM
timujin: Do you have any idea how many "if it escaped the lab we'd all be doomed" viruses there are out there? That's why there are protocols for this sort of thing.

Not amused:
encrypted-tbn3.google.com

actually, she looks fairly amused...
 
RexTalionis [TotalFark]
2012-01-26 01:49:12 PM
Slaves2Darkness: Coming over? Dam it I don't have enough snacks.

Meh we need a good plague to wipe away the pestelance that is China.

Whoever taught you English failed you in a big way.
 
raygundan
2012-01-26 01:49:27 PM
generallyso: You say CDC but you mean "media outlets whose income is determined by the size of their audience" hence headlines like
Has bird flu biology opened bioterror box?

I'm pretty sure that was written by Dan Vergano of USA TODAY rather than the CDC.

WHAT'S IN THE BOX?!???
 
TwowheelinTim
2012-01-26 02:26:31 PM
"David Nabarro, a World Health Organization expert, estimated that such a pandemic could kill 20 million to 150 million people worldwide."

That's a decent start...
 
Robot Eats Towson
2012-01-26 02:28:59 PM
dennysgod: having your nuts bit off by a Laplander

Has Fark discovered some new Laplander starlet-of-the-week I don't know about?
 
J. Frank Parnell
2012-01-26 02:31:48 PM
TwowheelinTim: "David Nabarro, a World Health Organization expert, estimated that such a pandemic could kill 20 million to 150 million people worldwide."

That's a decent start...

You first.
 
TwowheelinTim
2012-01-26 02:35:15 PM
J. Frank Parnell: TwowheelinTim: "David Nabarro, a World Health Organization expert, estimated that such a pandemic could kill 20 million to 150 million people worldwide."

That's a decent start...

You first.

Perhaps, perhaps not.

I'm not sweating it either way.
 
fifthhorseman
2012-01-26 04:22:37 PM
Bird flu is so 2011. 2012 is all about Totally Drug Resistant Tuberculosis.

http://www.wired.com/wiredscience/2012/01/invincible-tb-india/
 
suziequzie
2012-01-26 04:57:53 PM
Bird flu? Does that mean chicken prices are going to drop? I'll be stocking up.

/did the same thing with Swine Flu
 
Voiceofreason01
2012-01-26 06:33:04 PM
"David Nabarro, a World Health Organization expert, estimated that such a pandemic could kill 20 million to 150 million people worldwide."

translation: the first world will be fine

/unless you're old or immunocompromised
 
Flragnararch
2012-01-26 06:48:58 PM
I've been saying it for a while, the earth could really use 6 billion less people.

/preferably the more stupid of our kind.
//which might or might not include me.
 
que.guero
2012-01-26 06:51:46 PM
Does this mean I can kidnap Marion Cotillard and have her teach me French?
 
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