Why is "Some Guy" reading Cosmo?

Meetings with more than four people seem to get progressively more useless the more people are added.

The Japanese excel at stupid meetings. An hour of staring at their laptop screens while trying desperately to make the other person forget he ever asked a question that they weren't ready for is pretty much the norm here.

gopher321: Well, speaking for myself and the meetings I have to endure... *rests eyes* ...found myself nodding off occasionaly in those.

Uh-huh. That's a very good point you have there.

About the author:

Korin Miller
Korin is the site director for Cosmopolitan.com. She loves uncovering cool new research and learning more about what makes guys tick. Outside the Cosmo office, you can find her running with her dog, trying to convince friends to go to karaoke bars, and watching as much reality TV as humanly possible.

I didn't think watching reality TV was humanly possible.

oh look, Fred brought donuts!

AnotherOldFart: We agree
[leerburg.com image 438x451]

WND.com editorial staff meeting?

I dunno, but being in a meeting with a woman like this would make my IQ drop a few points, and would prevent me from paying attention to anything anyone said.

Harvey Manfrenjensenjen: [i105.photobucket.com image 402x337]

None of us is as dumb as all of us.

Thank you.

/Love Demotivators
//First thing I thought of.

I followed the link and was not going to read it because it was cosmopolitan. Then I saw they had a link that said, 'According to new research from Virginia Tech,' so I thought that I could read the actual study. The link is just back to the same cosmopolitan article. They have a link within an article to the article itself. Seriously, why?

AverageAmericanGuy: The Japanese excel at stupid meetings. An hour of staring at their laptop screens while trying desperately to make the other person forget he ever asked a question that they weren't ready for is pretty much the norm here.

Is this before or after the speech by three 75+ year old semi-retired higher-ups? I say "speech" rather than "speeches" because they all give the same speech. At every meeting.

And what uppity douche had the bright idea to ask a question at a meeting? No good can come from it.

Can we get this icon in cornflower blue?

*tooth sucking* Well, standard color is sea green....

Yes, but would you be able to make it cornflower blue?

...ah....etto....sea green is standard for this icon.

Yes...but the cornflower blue...? Possible?

*flop sweat* Ah...chotto...hai....sea green is standard.

Meetings make you stupid provided that it's 95% Powerpoint and 5% Q&A.

Good meetings consist of everyone speaking up about ideas and issues and having a general consensus in regards to a)what the meeting is about, and b)did the meeting achieve the goals that were intentionally set.

And depending if your meetings are super fancy, someone should always take minutes.

Hate, hate, hate staff meetings.

Once a month, all of the supervisors in my office have to meet to give summaries of what has happened in the last month to our boss. Even though I supervise no one, I am considered to be in administration, so I still have to go. :(

Out of the nine of us who have to meet each month, five of us know how to give, short, concise reports. The other four can make a meeting that should last no more than and hour and a half last 3 hours.

I always love the person who thinks they have to comment on every damn thing.

"blah blah blah"
"Oh, that's so true!"
"blah blah blah"
"Ha Ha Ha that is great!
"blah blah blah"
"That reminds me of an anecdote that I must tell you right now!"

Shut the hell up! Nobody cares, we don't need your damn senseless banter on every single flipping subject. If you could just keep your piehole shut and your "witty" (in your own damn mind) comments to yourself then this meeting will go a lot faster!

This is also usually the same person who has to tell you about their pets/children, how their weekend went (in excruciating detail) and every other little mundane tidbit of their boring existence because apparently they aren't using their brain enough to focus on their damn job!

/I may be an introvert, but at least I don't sound like a mindless idiot

If I had my way, meeting rooms would be completely devoid of chairs. Meetings would be a lot shorter that way.

Cerwin3302: Why is "Some Guy" reading Cosmo?

Cosmo is like the National Security Briefing the President gets each morning, except with better pictures. Ever wonder what she's thinking? Chances are it's about something she read in the mag.

As a technician who is on the way to work where I will be operating the equipment for a bunch of meetings, I'm getting a kick......

/etc..................

LegacyDL: consensus

go back to sweden.

The girlfriend works for a rather large bank.
Every Wed. morning, she has to take part in a conference call with the other managers/officers.
They basically cover everything that was sent out via email.
At least she can participate in her pajamas while lazing on the couch.

I have a weekly staff meeting...last 1.5 hrs...I only talk for a minute. Then there's the Tue "group" meeting, that's another hour. Every morning there's a 20 min "standup" to talk about the same shiat as yesterday. There's more meetings I could tell you about but I have to leave for a meeting.

/meeting

Scrambled Zen: Cerwin3302: Why is "Some Guy" reading Cosmo?

Cosmo is like the National Security Briefing the President gets each morning, except with better pictures. Ever wonder what she's thinking? Chances are it's about something she read in the mag.


Oooooo... I had not considered this. I may have to scan a copy next time in the checkout line.

LegacyDL: Meetings make you stupid provided that it's 95% Powerpoint and 5% Q&A.

Good meetings consist of everyone speaking up about ideas and issues and having a general consensus in regards to a)what the meeting is about, and b)did the meeting achieve the goals that were intentionally set.

And depending if your meetings are super fancy, someone should always take minutes.

If you a.) have something useful to communicate, and b.) know how to present, Powerpoints are sometimes appropriate.
As most presenters a.) don't and b.) don't, it rarely is and using PP only fools the incompetent into thinking they've communicated information. PP magnifies the Dunning-Kruger effect.

Burr: "I always love the person who thinks they have to comment on every damn thing."

As I read your post I kept waiting for you to turn it back around and point out all that annoying shiat about meetings is true of internet message boards.

I clicked on the "new research from Virginia Tech" link and it opened the same article in a new window.
Can't have people looking at the actual research now, can we?

My personal favorite are meetings to discuss why things aren't getting done. Here's a thought. Perhaps if there were fewer meetings to discuss why things aren't getting done, we could get some things done.

Meetings to discuss morale are fun, too. Well, Mr Upper Management, if you stopped acting so much like big brother and found some reasonable expectations, maybe we wouldn't feel so stressed out, maybe we'd perform better, and maybe we wouldn't hate you. No, buying us pizza for hitting a goal isn't going to help. A keg fridge and an open bar might.

Meetings don't make you stupid, they just wear you down til you don't give a shiat anymore.

//should be fine once the destruction of my soul is complete
///or once I have a couple more beers.

Harry Freakstorm: The following people need to be killed:

The guy who invites himself to a meeting and then has to be brought up to speed
The guy who comments on everything
The person who can't remember; denies everything
i.e. Tim, you were supposed to get the invoices. Tim: Really? Was I supposed to do that? I don't remember that assignment.


Please feel free to add to the list.

Don't forget "People who make lists"

Harvey Manfrenjensenjen: [i105.photobucket.com image 402x337]

came for this.


i came.

I was going to say something here but remembering old meetings b4 did made me dummr an I fergot...

He drank from the cup of management!

pute kisses like a man: They say teaching is supposed to help the mind learn, but I don't have time for that crap. You learn just as well, and probably faster, if you just take the time to understand a concept in its most simple terms and ignore all of the superfluous information that distracts most people.

It depends, really. Can be true sometimes, but teaching is most useful when you already have a working foundation of knowledge on something and need to reinforce that knowledge. Not when just starting out.

wademh: As most presenters a.) don't and b.) don't, it rarely is and using PP only fools the incompetent into thinking they've communicated information. PP magnifies the Dunning-Kruger effect.

THIS THIS THIS.
My favorite is when presenters take time to carefully, laboriously explain each separate part of a graph. WE WOULD NOT HAVE THIS JOB IF WE COULD NOT INTERPRET GRAPHS GOD DAMN IT HURRY IT UP.

as much as I don't like not having money because I've been unemployed for 8 years, I absolutely do not miss the meetings. I might as well have been sitting in the bathroom stall for all the good those forever gone stretches of time did.

Our corporate culture was such that you could not call out by name the person or department that was giving you an issue. Instead of saying "Keith farked up the math on the inventory receipt slip. The vendor only ships in packs of 3, we were supposed to get 6 of them, for a total of 18. Yet he wrote up his receipt as 1@15, which is not how the vendor ships the item."

Instead, we had to say "I received an erroneous inventory count, and it exceeded the allowable discrepancy cap, causing the computer to automatically put the invoice on hold. A discrepancy report was generated and forwarded to the appropriate department."

Then I'd be asked "Well, why wasn't the problem resolved?"

"Because it has not been verified by inventory, purchasing has not acknowledged the shortage, and the VP in charge of that department hasn't replied to forwarded messages."

"Why haven't you done anything about it?"

"After the initial notice was sent out, daily emails were sent following up on the discrepancy."

"And the conclusion is?"

"Still waiting for replies"

"Why haven't you done anything about it?"

At this point, mentally I'm swinging razor sharp machetes, firing belt fed sub machine guns with the other hand, pausing only to hurl poisoned tipped throwing stars and hand grenades. The stress of resisting those urges causes uber hypertension, so much that brain cells start to pop like sea creatures put in fresh water under a microscope slide. And that's why you get dumber.

Harvey Manfrenjensenjen: [i105.photobucket.com image 402x337]

Boy, I'll say. Look what the last national stupid meeting brung us ...

Clemkadidlefark: Harvey Manfrenjensenjen: [i105.photobucket.com image 402x337]

Boy, I'll say. Look what the last national stupid meeting brung us ...

[fc06.deviantart.net image 350x452]

Uh, the "last national stupid meeting" was in 2010...

Since we're all extremely busy with our own projects, we're extending this typical 15 minute meeting into a full 2 hours!