In Federalist Russia, Capitalism makes politicians more money than Soviet Russia ever did.

Pravda: Russia still super important and totally awesome. Also, America smells like an old woman's apartment and their chicks are fat.

Hey, Putin is a giant douche bag, but he was the first world leader to contact Bush and said something about "we know the pain of terrorism, we will help you anyway we can."

The Russian Federation not getting all up in NATO's business in Afghanistan shows just how much changed between 1991 and 2001.

Russia was pretty much executing all taliban... guess who stepped in and saved them....

Ya damn right they did Subby.



After they were blown up of course.


/SOOOOO in need of a meme.

""We were worried that the expansion of the US presence in the region would lead to bossy teachings of democracy. It could also trigger undesirable for Russia political processes in the region," Ivanov stressed out. "

That right there is some damn fine translationating.

Why do we bother with Pravda?

When did Pravda turn into The лук ?

Detinwolf: Why do we bother with PravdaFox?

FTFY

Nightsweat: ""We were worried that the expansion of the US presence in the region would lead to bossy teachings of democracy. It could also trigger undesirable for Russia political processes in the region," Ivanov stressed out. "

That right there is some damn fine translationating.

It's fun if you read that in a heavy Russian accent.

clovis69: Hey, Putin is a giant douche bag, but he was the first world leader to contact Bush and said something about "we know the pain of terrorism, we will help you anyway we can."

The Russian Federation not getting all up in NATO's business in Afghanistan shows just how much changed between 1991 and 2001.

Russia has thier own problem with extremists (and hostages in some cases). The enemy of my enemy is my friend and all that....Russia picked the industrialized nation in that scenario instead of the goat herders...but that won't stop them from blowing up a refinery in Beaumont from time to time. Or steering a hurricane towards New Orelans.

But The One ^TM is way too sophistictaed for the Taliban not to see his wisdom and excellency and superiority not to negotiate.

Hey, can we send Obama into negotiations wearing a Fark Allah t-shirt?

Well being that they helped create the problem in the first place with their heavy handed butchery of the locals.... uhhh, yeah, thanks guys. Kinda. I guess.

Note: I'm not saying we didn't play our own part in the farking up of Afghanistan, so don't get your panties in a twist. We most certainly share some of that responsibility as well.

Where did this shiate come from? Russia has its own problems with Muslim extremists. Not to mention the Soviet Union and the Taliban's daddies butchered each other regularly in the first Afghan war. This makes no sense.

Nightsweat: ""We were worried that the expansion of the US presence in the region would lead to bossy teachings of democracy. It could also trigger undesirable for Russia political processes in the region," Ivanov stressed out. "

That right there is some damn fine translationating.

Let me fix translation for you. Please read with heavy Russian accent, comrad.

"We worried expansion US presence in the region would lead bossy teachings democracy. It trigger undesirable for Russia political processes in region,"

Hey, glad to help out.

Everything I need to know about Russians I learned in Eve Online.

It isn't like the Russians got away from Islamic terrorism. The Chechyns are as crazy and insanely determined as the Taliban ever were.

Apparently the concensus is that after we helped Afghans drive out the Soviets we left a young impressionable Afghan male demographic in the hands of nutbar extremests.

lesson: You break, you fix, our you pay more later.

We'll never know, but had we stayed out of Afghanistan all together it may not have been such a problem now. Of course not helping the Mujahadeen fight Soviets may have meant an enduring Soviet Empire,but seems rather unlikely.

Now our interpid service members are left driving up and down roads in Afghanistan hoping the one or two of the 15k IEDs planted every year aren't going to change their lives for the worse.

Maintaining farking hegemony ain't easy, eh?

The Taliban are an organisation that sprang from the mujaheddin that the US armed twenty years ago against the Soviets. They're not terrorists - they're the shiatstain that is runs the asshole of world, Afghanistan. When the US leaves, they're going to take over. It's not a matter of if, it's a matter of when, and the Taliban knows it just as well as the US does.

Arkanaut: Nightsweat: ""We were worried that the expansion of the US presence in the region would lead to bossy teachings of democracy. It could also trigger undesirable for Russia political processes in the region," Ivanov stressed out. "

That right there is some damn fine translationating.

It's fun if you read that in a heavy Russian accent.

Virtually everything is fun read in a heavy Russian accent.

Work in field all day, drink vodka. Strong like bull.

Yaxe: When the US leaves, they're going to take over. It's not a matter of if, it's a matter of when, and the Taliban knows it just as well as the US does.

Well, then let's hope next time some Saudi militant Bush friend like Bin Laden shows up with plans to attack the US, they'll remember we know where they live.
Other than that, will be glad when our troops are out of there and the US is done with it.

Fano: Arkanaut: Nightsweat: ""We were worried that the expansion of the US presence in the region would lead to bossy teachings of democracy. It could also trigger undesirable for Russia political processes in the region," Ivanov stressed out. "

That right there is some damn fine translationating.

It's fun if you read that in a heavy Russian accent.

Virtually everything is fun read in a heavy Russian accent.

Work in field all day, drink vodka. Strong like bull.

Not weak like Ukraine :)

Arkanaut: Fano: Arkanaut: Nightsweat: ""We were worried that the expansion of the US presence in the region would lead to bossy teachings of democracy. It could also trigger undesirable for Russia political processes in the region," Ivanov stressed out. "

That right there is some damn fine translationating.

It's fun if you read that in a heavy Russian accent.

Virtually everything is fun read in a heavy Russian accent.

Work in field all day, drink vodka. Strong like bull.

Not weak like Ukraine :)

I am from Ukraine. What you say Ukraine weak?

That does sound like the way they would phrase it...

TLDR

The Taliban asked for help against the United States at the beginning of the Afghan invasion, some politician flipped off some 45,000 people simultaneously.

Taliban: Hey Russia, want to help us fight the US in what may scale up to WWIII?

Russia:

Yaxe: The Taliban are an organisation that sprang from the mujaheddin that the US armed twenty years ago against the Soviets. They're not terrorists - they're the shiatstain that is runs the asshole of world, Afghanistan. When the US leaves, they're going to take over. It's not a matter of if, it's a matter of when, and the Taliban knows it just as well as the US does.

Yeah I know this is Fark, but i really hate it when people talk out of their ass about shiat they don't know about. Usually IRL i just let it go, but I hear this shiat all the time it's like nails on a chalkboard.

First, more of the mujaheddin are part of the Afghan government now than ever were part of the Taliban. One of the reasons why the takeover of Afghanistan was so quick was that the CIA had already rekindled contacts with former Mujahadin that got them in contact with tribal leaders. Once the word was put out, any Taliban support pretty much melted overnight.

(atleast you didn't say one of those bizarre "CIA. Trained Bin Laden" claims)

If you really want to blame the U.S. for something, just look at when the Soviets withdrew: 1989. Now look at when the fall of Najibullah happened: 1992. Three Farking years later. And yes, Najibullah was stating he was fighting against extremists and warned what would happen if the warlords were able to take over. The U.S. was still funding the warlords during this time. It wasn't enough for the Soviets to withdraw, they needed an abject failure (kind of like we left Vietnam in 73, and our friendly government falls in 75).

The Taliban, while some of the leaders were in fact muj, including Mullah Omar, most of their assent is due to the radical wahabbi madrassas being built in Pakistan in the 1980s, bankrolled by the Saudis. A huge influx of refugees and orphans met fresh male bodies in these schools. God knows what happened in there. But comes the early 90s they were a fresh Army for the Talib leaders, all they had to do was signal the schools to shut down and thousands of young men and boys came pouring into Afghanstan to fight against Hekmaytr, Massoud, Dostum, and other warlords whose armies did fight against the soviets.

Also, in the media and even much of the military use the term "taliban", most of them aren't remotely associated with the former Taliban organization. In eastern Afghanistan for example, they mostly follow Hesbi Islami Gulbuddin, or HIG, led by former US ally Gulbuddin Hekmatyar. Throughout the central portion down through the south are several warlord and druglord factions. Down in Southeastern portions their might be several allied groups that might be claiming links to the former "Taliban", but most of the country just assumes when the U.S.. says "Taliban" we mean "enemy" or "terrorist" or something like that. These words have distinct meanings for them. Taliban, literally meaning "students", is associated with the groups running the islamic madrassas on the Pakistan border, which most of Afghanistan has accepted is a foreign strain of islam not local to Afghan

Gulbuddin Hekmatyar btw, was the main US ally during the Afghan war. Not because we gave a shiat, but because our total "hands off CYA at all costs" policy meant we blindly followed the Saudis and Pakistanis and funding and arming the mujahadeen. The british were smarter, they got all up in their shiat and found Ahmed Shah Massoud was the guy to get behind, but the Saudis and Pakistanis kept insisting he was some local brigand not worth mentioning and couldn't be trusted (he did have a brief peace agreement with the Russians).

I wouldn't be too overly confident that the "Taliban" would take over, as they've been reduced to just an equal faction of all the warlords. It would, most definitely return to warlordism. The U.S. could probably save Kabul with minimal oversight, but the rest of the region is toast. The eastern portion should just combine with the NWFP and make a joint effort with Pakistan to just wall the whole area off with mines.

/you're daily lesson on Afghanistan, hope somebody was paying attention.

ChuDogg: If you really want to blame the U.S. for something, just look at when the Soviets withdrew: 1989. Now look at when the fall of Najibullah happened: 1992. Three Farking years later. And yes, Najibullah was stating he was fighting against extremists and warned what would happen if the warlords were able to take over. The U.S. was still funding the warlords during this time. It wasn't enough for the Soviets to withdraw, they needed an abject failure (kind of like we left Vietnam in 73, and our friendly government falls in 75).

Also, if you dig hard for pictures around this time, Kabul was bustling metropolis compared to what it is now. There were tech centers, where women went to work in mini skirts, went out clubbing at night, shiat like that. The speed in which in turned into a complete and total shiathole, three... maybe four years, is horrifying. I can't imagine what is was like for anyone who lived through that

/yes i responded to my own post.

EdNortonsTwin: Apparently the concensus is that after we helped Afghans drive out the Soviets we left a young impressionable Afghan male demographic in the hands of nutbar extremests.


The shiatty part is it didn't even have to come to that. The consensus is that the warlords the CIA backed didn't fight the Russians. They took our weapons and used them in their own petty squabbles. The Taliban got the street cred because they actually fought the USSR. All we had to do was find a secular leader who didn't suck balls.

/same reason Mao ended up running China and the KMT got stuck on some island

ChuDogg: Yaxe: The Taliban are an organisation that sprang from the mujaheddin that the US armed twenty years ago against the Soviets. They're not terrorists - they're the shiatstain that is runs the asshole of world, Afghanistan. When the US leaves, they're going to take over. It's not a matter of if, it's a matter of when, and the Taliban knows it just as well as the US does. ...

I was assigned do a project report on Afghanistan for my government class my senior year in high school, 1992. I remember some of my research and it is parallel with your post, wish I could have had you as a source then!

Gyrfalcon: Pravda: Mangling the truth since 1918.

Hey, they have the monopoly on truth, their name says so, hmmm? It's the Izvestia that you have to watch for... as the old saying goes - there is no izvestii in Pravda and no pravda in Izvestia..