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US Army officer confirms that team of US commandos are nearing the Iranian border. Also adds that they will cross the border at 32°11' 4" N by 53°5'12" E at exactly 11:34 Zulu right near that great ambush spot
(
news.yahoo.com
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Herat
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xterraadam
2012-01-20 08:45:21 AM
+1 Subby for somewhat accurate coordinates.
Fubini
2012-01-20 08:48:16 AM
I don't get it, if we have all this technology why don't we use it?
Let's just tell the world and the Iranian people that we're going to bomb 3 power generation facilities daily as long as they've shut down the strait. If they're going to hold us hostage over energy then we'll hold them hostage to their energy. No ground forces needed.
Bob16
2012-01-20 08:49:07 AM
Let's hope they don't shoot one of their own or fark things up like they usually end up doing.
Inigo
2012-01-20 08:49:34 AM
I'LL STEAL IT!
NO ONE WILL EVER KNOW!
Wheyfaring Stranger
2012-01-20 08:49:37 AM
When will they be back?
MyNameIsMofuga
2012-01-20 08:49:58 AM
Was it COL Geraldo Rivera?
D_V_D_A
2012-01-20 08:50:19 AM
My orders came through. My squadron ships out tomorrow. We're bombing the storage depots at Daiquiri at 1800 hours. We're coming in from the north, below their radar.
When will you be back?
I can't tell you that. It's classified.
DammitIForgotMyLogin
2012-01-20 08:50:26 AM
Bombing the storage depots at Daiquiri? From the north, under their radar?
jimmyjackfunk
2012-01-20 08:51:37 AM
Inigo
:
[i.imgur.com image 480x360]
I'LL STEAL IT! NO ONE WILL EVER KNOW!
Help Tom.....Help Dick.....Help Larry!!
/got nuthin but that was a funny cartoon.
Fark Irony Police
2012-01-20 08:51:43 AM
fappomatic
2012-01-20 08:52:35 AM
So, we're there in a strictly observational and advisory capacity. Not like we'd be there for advanced tactical ops or illuminating targets for our bombers or anything surly.
Tell the Iranians they can have the strait, we're going to carve our own damn strait. With HE ordnance. Right through their neck of the woods.
IronOcelot
2012-01-20 08:53:10 AM
D_V_D_A
:
My orders came through. My squadron ships out tomorrow. We're bombing the storage depots at Daiquiri at 1800 hours. We're coming in from the north, below their radar.
When will you be back?
I can't tell you that. It's classified.
Captain I have to remind you!!
You know those order marked Top Secret said to come in from the East!
Boeheimian Rhapsody
2012-01-20 08:53:10 AM
Fubini
:
I don't get it, if we have all this technology why don't we use it?
Let's just tell the world and the Iranian people that we're going to bomb 3 power generation facilities daily as long as they've shut down the strait. If they're going to hold us hostage over energy then we'll hold them hostage to their energy. No ground forces needed.
you know how i know you didn't read the article?
jakomo002
2012-01-20 08:53:17 AM
If the Straits of Hormuz are closed, say hello to $200-$250 a barrel for oil.
Which, um, you know, is fantastic news for the oil companies. Maybe not so much for the poeple who need to buy gas for their cars, but BOOGA BOOGA IRAN!
I won a math debate
2012-01-20 08:54:53 AM
I predict a situation not unlike two kids arguing.
Iran: "Get out of my
room
country!
US: "Na-Na, I'm not in your country!" *hovers foot over border*
Iran: "MOOOOOOM!"
/hopefully, nothing bad will happen.
tetsoushima
2012-01-20 08:56:01 AM
Boeheimian Rhapsody
:
Fubini: I don't get it, if we have all this technology why don't we use it?
Let's just tell the world and the Iranian people that we're going to bomb 3 power generation facilities daily as long as they've shut down the strait. If they're going to hold us hostage over energy then we'll hold them hostage to their energy. No ground forces needed.
you know how i know you didn't read the article?
When I clicked it, all that was there was Yahoo! comments... It was like staring into forever.
theknuckler_33
2012-01-20 08:56:59 AM
Fubini
:
I don't get it, if we have all this technology why don't we use it?
Let's just tell the world and the Iranian people that we're going to bomb 3 power generation facilities daily as long as they've shut down the strait. If they're going to hold us hostage over energy then we'll hold them hostage to their energy. No ground forces needed.
Because they haven't actually shut down the strait?
Calcasieu
2012-01-20 08:57:04 AM
Came for the "Airplane" reference, leaving satisfied.
DECMATH
2012-01-20 09:08:35 AM
Comment hidden due to low rating.
HotIgneous Intruder
2012-01-20 09:09:21 AM
These Internet Intelligence Commandos, they operate under the aegis of the shadowy, seldom-invoked super-secret classification rating "Pinky-Promise Secret." (PPS). They could show you their pinkies, but they they'd have to kill you.
/Because counterintelligence is the next best thing to real intelligence
//Surprised this wasn't published in USAToady
///News that's not news, how does it work
BitwiseShift
2012-01-20 09:09:46 AM
Tanks for the memories. All lined up on the border.
Pelvic Splanchnic Ganglion
2012-01-20 09:10:46 AM
Elaine: "When will you be back?"
Ted: "I can't tell you that; it's classified."
NewportBarGuy
2012-01-20 09:12:22 AM
"I love it when a plan comes together!"
PonceAlyosha
2012-01-20 09:13:31 AM
theknuckler_33
:
Fubini: I don't get it, if we have all this technology why don't we use it?
Let's just tell the world and the Iranian people that we're going to bomb 3 power generation facilities daily as long as they've shut down the strait. If they're going to hold us hostage over energy then we'll hold them hostage to their energy. No ground forces needed.
Because they haven't actually shut down the strait?
And they're absolutely not going to either. Oh no, an isolated country is feigning bellicose because it wants to distract from its weak position and limited options. What a shock.
Fubini
2012-01-20 09:13:35 AM
theknuckler_33
:
Fubini: I don't get it, if we have all this technology why don't we use it?
Let's just tell the world and the Iranian people that we're going to bomb 3 power generation facilities daily as long as they've shut down the strait. If they're going to hold us hostage over energy then we'll hold them hostage to their energy. No ground forces needed.
Because they haven't actually shut down the strait?
I know they haven't shut down the strait, it would be a threat.
ObscureNameHere
2012-01-20 09:17:46 AM
I am sure that they will sending in a flotilla of Marine Core soldiers to handle this any day now.
/go FLYNAVY!
danno_to_infinity
2012-01-20 09:18:18 AM
I see what you did, subby
coordinates are almost the dead center of Iran
Marine1
2012-01-20 09:26:09 AM
There aren't many countries on the planet that will rescue your sailors from pirates one week and threaten you over blocking a commercial straight the next.
QuinnTheFetus
2012-01-20 09:26:11 AM
Then Howie survived?
netcentric
2012-01-20 09:26:49 AM
Qatari cav arriving..... 1/9 an old cavalry unit, traded in their choppers for camels....
Magorn
2012-01-20 09:27:07 AM
Fubini
:
I don't get it, if we have all this technology why don't we use it?
Let's just tell the world and the Iranian people that we're going to bomb 3 power generation facilities daily as long as they've shut down the strait. If they're going to hold us hostage over energy then we'll hold them hostage to their energy. No ground forces needed.
Well the first and most obvious reason is that the average Iranian on the street farking LOVES the US, our clothes, our music, our culture-they can't get enough. However they are also an extremely proud people (in their minds they belong to one of history's 3 greatest civilizations- China and "The West" being the other two). If we start bombing them, or invade, they will rally around the (right now extremely unpopular) government in a heartbeat. If, on the other hand we continue to cripple thier economy with sanctions we will create conditions in the country very similar to the ones that touched off "Arab Spring" in Egypt in very short order.
Inigo
2012-01-20 09:30:39 AM
Magorn
:
If, on the other hand we continue to cripple thier economy with sanctions we will create conditions in the country very similar to the ones that touched off "Arab Spring" in Egypt in very short order.
And that turned out
great
.
FLMountainMan
2012-01-20 09:34:26 AM
ObscureNameHere
:
I am sure that they will sending in a flotilla of Marine Core soldiers to handle this any day now.
/go
FLYNAVY!
notsureifserious.jpg
teflon
2012-01-20 09:36:34 AM
Pelvic Splanchnic Ganglion
:
Elaine: "When will you be back?"
Ted: "I can't tell you that; it's classified."
Came for this. Leaving satisfied.
/Over Macho Grande?
Cary
2012-01-20 09:37:16 AM
xterraadam
:
+1 Subby for somewhat accurate coordinates.
Accurate for the
center
of Iran.
I see what subby did there.
+1 for astute military humor.
Riche
2012-01-20 09:41:34 AM
Fubini
:
I don't get it, if we have all this technology why don't we use it?
Let's just tell the world and the Iranian people that we're going to bomb 3 power generation facilities daily as long as they've shut down the strait. If they're going to hold us hostage over energy then we'll hold them hostage to their energy. No ground forces needed.
You're thinking WAY too small.
If Iran tries to close the straight the U.S. will be doing a hell of a lot more damage than that. It would also be on a near nonstop basis starting several hours later.
And there's no need to tell the world because everybody in the world who is at all informed already knows this including the Iranians.
Magorn
2012-01-20 09:49:19 AM
Inigo
:
Magorn: If, on the other hand we continue to cripple thier economy with sanctions we will create conditions in the country very similar to the ones that touched off "Arab Spring" in Egypt in very short order.
And that turned out great.
Well as it hasn't "turned out" at all just yet, I withhold judgment. But why are Americans so impatient and anti-democracy when it comes to the rest of the world anyway. If we could have kept our farking hands off the budding Iranian democracy 60 years ago we'd probably have a stable, powerful regional ally in Iran, instead of Islamic theocracy that hates us. Same thing with Egypt. Even if the inital results of installing a true democracy in that country is that the Muslim Brotherhood takes over, imposes a more theocratic rule and deosn't like America very much, so the fark what if that's what the people of Egypt want?
Sooner or later people will tire of that, and given that they have a way to make democratic change, they'll be able to do something about that when the time comes. I think history shows that True democracies almost invaribly progress down the path of greater personal and economic freedom, and as they do, they become natural allies of the US, and ones we don;t have to be ashamed of supporting later
Broom
2012-01-20 09:54:43 AM
Inigo
:
Magorn: If, on the other hand we continue to cripple thier economy with sanctions we will create conditions in the country very similar to the ones that touched off "Arab Spring" in Egypt in very short order.
And that turned out great.
Better than it was before.
Oakenshield
2012-01-20 09:58:18 AM
Classic. Headline implies that after a long journey, A Special Forces unit is getting close to entering Iran. The use of "commando" is a nice touch - gives it that Hollywood visual.
Story then indicates a Special Forces unit is operating somewhere close to the Iranian border. Probably making contacts and working to prevent arms trafficking, one would guess.
This is a demonstration of why Fark exists.
Secret Master of All Flatulence
2012-01-20 10:02:07 AM
Wait, the US has troops in Afghanistan?!?!? When did THAT happen???
Stabone33
2012-01-20 10:04:19 AM
jakomo002
:
If the Straits of Hormuz are closed, say hello to $200-$250 a barrel for oil.
Which, um, you know, is fantastic news for the oil companies. Maybe not so much for the poeple who need to buy gas for their cars, but BOOGA BOOGA IRAN!
*headdesk*
Donnchadha
2012-01-20 10:11:57 AM
Wheyfaring Stranger
:
When will they be back?
I can't tell you that. It's classified.
Voiceofreason01
2012-01-20 10:16:29 AM
xterraadam
:
+1 Subby for somewhat accurate coordinates.
this
/given the usual amount of effort apparent in most fark headlines I'm impressed by subby's initiative
angry_scientist
2012-01-20 10:17:50 AM
Secret Master of All Flatulence
:
Wait, the US has troops in Afghanistan?!?!? When did THAT happen???
Somebody threatened our supply of hand made blankets with holes in them.
Rapmaster2000
2012-01-20 10:25:00 AM
I hope they have rocket motorcycles. Sweet.
RexTalionis
2012-01-20 10:25:05 AM
Magorn
:
Well the first and most obvious reason is that the average Iranian on the street farking LOVES the US, our clothes, our music, our culture-they can't get enough.
I thought they love our 1980s clothes, our 1980s music and our 1980s culture.
/Technically, your terrible 1980s clothes, 1980s music, and 1980s culture, since I wasn't around here for the 80s.
JackieRabbit
2012-01-20 10:28:16 AM
We're just farking with Iran in our ongoing saber-rattling back-and-forth. Nothing to see here. We've probably had special forces inside Iran for months.
wingnut396
2012-01-20 10:31:17 AM
Magorn
:
Well as it hasn't "turned out" at all just yet, I withhold judgment. But why are Americans so impatient and anti-democracy when it comes to the rest of the world anyway. If we could have kept our farking hands off the budding Iranian democracy 60 years ago we'd probably have a stable, powerful regional ally in Iran, instead of Islamic theocracy that hates us.
Because the budding democracy didn't like Standard Oil. They wanted to do stupid stuff, like control the resources of their own country. Can you believe THOSE people!
BitwiseShift
2012-01-20 10:32:39 AM
jakomo002
:
If the Straits of Hormuz are closed, say hello to $200-$250 a barrel for oil.
Which, um, you know, is
fantastic news for the oil companies
From the Strange Quatrain of the Nostradamus Iluminanti Club on History Channel 2
Sinking of the Maine- Spanish American War
Sinking of the Lusitania- WW1
Sinking of the Alabama- WW2
Sinking of the Pueblo- Korean War Related
Gulf of Tonkin- Vietnam War
Attempted sinking of the Liberty- 6 Day War
Any oil company with an old leaky tanker could collect a little insurance money on the side, and peddle that oil for $300/barrel. With Iranian Navy boats buzzing along side, who could say they didn't plant a mine or fire torpedos by accident.
Just clue Boehner and Cantor to buy oil futures and it's all good.
fugeeface
2012-01-20 10:40:05 AM
When does the ground war start?
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