I bet the prostitute will be a popular check-out.

with a library card?

WITH A $20 BILL IN MY FLY?

JC

...covered in bees?

You can buy a judge but only rent a stripper.

At my local library?

through a haze of alcohol and shame?

For cesarean scars?

Harry Freakstorm: The article made me think: What is Elizabeth Berkley doing these days?



GIS for Elizebeth Berkley 2011 says not too bad.

fireclown: Harry Freakstorm: The article made me think: What is Elizabeth Berkley doing these days?

[i1.squidoocdn.com image 250x383]

GIS for Elizebeth Berkley 2011 says not too bad.

Yo Elizabeth Berkley, I'm happy for you and everything, but Demi Moore in Striptease was the best stripper performance of all time. OF ALL TIME

So, for diverse life experiences, they chose a Reform Jew?

In almost every major city in the world, but especially in the US/Canada, you can't heave a brick without hitting 9 or 10 Reform (or 'secular') Jews - they've tried this in Jerusalem (which is partly how this whole mess started).

Finding a practicing Orthodox Jew in a major city, or better, a Jew who actually knows things beyond "We don't believe Jesus saved the world" (and even that's asking a lot sometimes) is much harder. Trust me, choosing to live that lifestyle is far more "diverse" (in the sense of being outside the context of 99% of peoples' experiences).

// that's not Reform = secular, but Reform or secular

HeadKase: a police officer or a bipolar man

lolwut.jpg

It could be both if he has schizophrenia.

AngiesList is expanding their offerings?

Known three HIV positive people (all are deceased, now). They weren't that interesting unless you were really interested in the mechanics of Sunday brunches and circuit parties...

Better than talking to a judge for twenty minutes, though...

Crewmannumber6: through a haze of alcohol and shame?

Trust me, you don't have to go to Canada to make both happen in one night.

It's always better when they are crying.

So you heard about the stripper who had two yutes appear before her?

Just don't forget them in the car or they'll get all melty.

You can now check out a judge the same way you check out a stripper

While they're wearing a thong?

Old news, by 40 years.

Grables'Daughter: You can 'check out' a stripper?

Hell, you can do that at any strip club.

As far as talking to them, buy them a drink.

God, no. Then they'll never leave.

by wearing baggy sweat pants and no underwear?

Snarcoleptic_Hoosier: pudding7: TheSpaceAdmiral: It would be more interesting if the judge and prostitute were the same person.

"Oooooh, baby, your list of charges is sooooo long. Prepare for oral arguments. I want to detain you in handcuffs until you're conditionally discharged all over my face."

"How do you plead?"

"On my hands and knees!"

Your Honor! I'd like to make a motion! Perhaps something with a pelvic thrust.

Motion granted, please treat the witness as hostile.

In a locked room in my basement?

Dr Dreidel: So, for diverse life experiences, they chose a Reform Jew?

In almost every major city in the world, but especially in the US/Canada, you can't heave a brick without hitting 9 or 10 Reform (or 'secular') Jews - they've tried this in Jerusalem (which is partly how this whole mess started).

Finding a practicing Orthodox Jew in a major city, or better, a Jew who actually knows things beyond "We don't believe Jesus saved the world" (and even that's asking a lot sometimes) is much harder. Trust me, choosing to live that lifestyle is far more "diverse" (in the sense of being outside the context of 99% of peoples' experiences).

// that's not Reform = secular, but Reform or secular

So what you're telling is that you hate Jews, right?

Cuz that's what I got from that rant.

Dr Dreidel: in the US/Canada, you can't heave a brick without hitting 9 or 10 Reform (or 'secular') Jews - they've tried this in Jerusalem (which is partly how this whole mess started).

I guffawed.

Grables'Daughter: You can 'check out' a stripper?

Hell, you can do that at any strip club.

As far as talking to them, buy them a drink.

I give all strippers a once over first.

First, I check the insides of their lips and look for herpes scars.
Then I smack them on their ass to check reflexes.
After that I have them take off their shoes and lift their foot so I can check for things like track marks or other nasties.
Finally, I run my hands through their hair once or twice checking for bugs and if they pass, they get some money from me.

Pshh! Gary Larson did this very thing DECADES ago. :P

Sat in a little room in the Smithsoanian in front of a big glass window with a little brass plaque below it that said "H. Sapiens".

Whatthefark: Grables'Daughter: You can 'check out' a stripper?

Hell, you can do that at any strip club.

As far as talking to them, buy them a drink.

I give all strippers a once over first.

First, I check the insides of their lips and look for herpes scars.
Then I smack them on their ass to check reflexes.
After that I have them take off their shoes and lift their foot so I can check for things like track marks or other nasties.
Finally, I run my hands through their hair once or twice checking for bugs and if they pass, they get some money from me.

Translation: "I've never touched a woman in my entire life."

Whatthefark: Grables'Daughter: You can 'check out' a stripper?

Hell, you can do that at any strip club.

As far as talking to them, buy them a drink.

I give all strippers a once over first.

First, I check the insides of their lips and look for herpes scars.
Then I smack them on their ass to check reflexes.
After that I have them take off their shoes and lift their foot so I can check for things like track marks or other nasties.
Finally, I run my hands through their hair once or twice checking for bugs and if they pass, they get some money from me.

So you never ever gave a stripper money, then?

Knara: Dr Dreidel: So, for diverse life experiences, they chose a Reform Jew?

In almost every major city in the world, but especially in the US/Canada, you can't heave a brick without hitting 9 or 10 Reform (or 'secular') Jews - they've tried this in Jerusalem (which is partly how this whole mess started).

Finding a practicing Orthodox Jew in a major city, or better, a Jew who actually knows things beyond "We don't believe Jesus saved the world" (and even that's asking a lot sometimes) is much harder. Trust me, choosing to live that lifestyle is far more "diverse" (in the sense of being outside the context of 99% of peoples' experiences).

So what you're telling is that you hate Jews, right?

Cuz that's what I got from that rant.

Yup. Dr Adolf Farrakhan Jackson Kristallnacht Dreidel, that's me. Ask any farker who's spoken to me - HUGE anti-Semite. That's why I picked the name - all them Jooze is doctors anyway, mirite? It's a wonder one of the Jew lawyers didn't Jew me out of my Jew gold Jewily, otherwise, I'd be up Jew's creek without a Jew.

Dr Dreidel: Yup. Dr Adolf Farrakhan Jackson Kristallnacht Dreidel, that's me. Ask any farker who's spoken to me - HUGE anti-Semite. That's why I picked the name - all them Jooze is doctors anyway, mirite? It's a wonder one of the Jew lawyers didn't Jew me out of my Jew gold Jewily, otherwise, I'd be up Jew's creek without a Jew.

I thought that was spelled JOOZ?

Dr Dreidel: Knara: Dr Dreidel: So, for diverse life experiences, they chose a Reform Jew?

In almost every major city in the world, but especially in the US/Canada, you can't heave a brick without hitting 9 or 10 Reform (or 'secular') Jews - they've tried this in Jerusalem (which is partly how this whole mess started).

Finding a practicing Orthodox Jew in a major city, or better, a Jew who actually knows things beyond "We don't believe Jesus saved the world" (and even that's asking a lot sometimes) is much harder. Trust me, choosing to live that lifestyle is far more "diverse" (in the sense of being outside the context of 99% of peoples' experiences).

So what you're telling is that you hate Jews, right?

Cuz that's what I got from that rant.

Yup. Dr Adolf Farrakhan Jackson Kristallnacht Dreidel, that's me. Ask any farker who's spoken to me - HUGE anti-Semite. That's why I picked the name - all them Jooze is doctors anyway, mirite? It's a wonder one of the Jew lawyers didn't Jew me out of my Jew gold Jewily, otherwise, I'd be up Jew's creek without a Jew.

JUBILEE JOO JOO JOBABALLOO

stpickrell: Dr Dreidel: Yup. Dr Adolf Farrakhan Jackson Kristallnacht Dreidel, that's me. Ask any farker who's spoken to me - HUGE anti-Semite. That's why I picked the name - all them Jooze is doctors anyway, mirite? It's a wonder one of the Jew lawyers didn't Jew me out of my Jew gold Jewily, otherwise, I'd be up Jew's creek without a Jew.

I thought that was spelled JOOZ?

So you're saying, then, that you BOTH hate Jews?

/j00z
//implying someone is an anti-semite is almost as fun as implying they're a pedophile
///but the later is so played out right now, anti-semitism is making a comeback
////anti-semitism FTW!
///wait a sec...

fireclown: GIS for Elizebeth Berkley 2011 says not too bad.

Like the fist of an angry God.

Arkanaut: Yo Elizabeth Berkley, I'm happy for you and everything, but Demi Moore in Striptease was the best stripper performance of all time. OF ALL TIME

Sure. Apart from the horrible, fake balloon tits. Barf.