it's really not that hard to assembly shiat. there are instructions. but then again i might just be surrounded by idiots that struggle not piss themselves.

A Fark Handle: it's really not that hard to assembly shiat. there are instructions. but then again i might just be surrounded by idiots that struggle not piss themselves.

Hey f*ck you in the goat ass, buddy. You try NOT pissing yourself when it is -buttasscold degree outside and you drink a gallon of water a day

Home construction is killing the furniture industry
And it's illegal.

A Fark Handle: it's really not that hard to assembly shiat. there are instructions. but then again i might just be surrounded by idiots that struggle not piss themselves.

I agree. I never understood the "IKEA stuff is hard to put together" and "IKEA instructions are hard" jokes. They even have pictures for people who can't read.

XMark: Home construction is killing the furniture industry
And it's illegal.

PDF is killing the brochure industry.
And it's illegal.

If only I had an Allen wrench, I could conquer the world.

Frustration? A untrained monkey could put that stuff together.

I have put together a bed, a dresser and sidetable from IKEA and it was amazingly easy. And they are sturdy as all heck and haven't worn down at all.
I'm amazed actually.

XMark: Home construction is killing the furniture industry
And it's illegal.

You say that as if the furniture industry has an inherent right to exist.

/buggy whips

uofacats2004: I have put together a bed, a dresser and sidetable from IKEA and it was amazingly easy. And they are sturdy as all heck and haven't worn down at all.
I'm amazed actually.

You've obviously never owned a Lillberg sofa. That thing is a giant piece of shiat that I've had to stitch together with pieces of wood and bolts. It's the only bad thing I've ever bought from IKEA, but it's not just a little bad, it sucks bigtime.

/love my Malm

Why are people so down on them? When I was married, my wife bought Ikea crap all the time and I never had any issues with the instructions.

austin_millbarge: Frustration? A untrained monkey could put that stuff together.

Not all of us can afford monkeys.

UsikFark: XMark: Home construction is killing the furniture industry
And it's illegal.

PDF is killing the brochure industry.
And it's illegal.

SOPA would nip that in the butt.

/Did I say that tack-fully?

UsikFark: austin_millbarge: Frustration? A untrained monkey could put that stuff together.

Not all of us can afford monkeys.

white people problems?

I'm more amazed that people actually read/ look at assembly instructions. Must be for the womenfolk.

The desk my computer is now sitting on is an Ikea. One side is an open metal loop. The screws to attach it to the main part of the desk are like TWO FEET long. The allen wrench came with a special plastic handle. But even with that I had to brace the goddamn thing with my foot to drive in the screws. And I couldn't even get the second one all the way in before the head stripped.

And we won't even speak about the cabinet I put the bottom shelf on upside down.

I like Ikea

Here you will find a list of our assembly instructions for our products which you can download and print right from your own computer!

Now this is just great. I can download them to my computer and print them out. But I have no printer. I can't download them to a friends computer, only mine.

jingks: A Fark Handle: it's really not that hard to assembly shiat. there are instructions. but then again i might just be surrounded by idiots that struggle not piss themselves.

I agree. I never understood the "IKEA stuff is hard to put together" and "IKEA instructions are hard" jokes. They even have pictures for people who can't read.

For the most part I agree, but there are a few times where it can be confusing. A few weekends ago, I assembled one of their "Effektiv" cabinets, and the only time I ran into difficulty was when I was installing a roll-front door (I wanted to be able to lock one section of the cabinet). It turned out that they had only pre-drilled enough holes in the cabinet so that you could figure out where to drill the remaining necessary holes yourself, and the instructions didn't exactly make it clear that drilling was required (they had a picture of a bradawl and pointed at where the holes needed to be made, but a bradawl looks very similar to a screwdriver in an Ikea diagram).

Fortunately, despite what the Ikea support people said, using a real electric drill worked just fine.

/was actually my first time assembling an Ikea piece

jingks: A Fark Handle: it's really not that hard to assembly shiat. there are instructions. but then again i might just be surrounded by idiots that struggle not piss themselves.

I agree. I never understood the "IKEA stuff is hard to put together" and "IKEA instructions are hard" jokes. They even have pictures for people who can't read.

99% of the instructions are easy. The trouble is that there's always one tiny detail that they don't mention or make clear. Usually in the early stages. You get to the final step of assembly and discover that a cross-bar is upside down or something. Even re-reading everything to figure out where you screwed up, you need a magnifying glass to see that the flueveg has a scrawloc hole on the left side but not the right, thus preventing it from connecting properly to the glunstok if installed upside down.

Hey... ummmm fellas.. I followed them all at once and made this. Should I be scared?

Private space should be able to solve this. Ship the boxed furniture into low Earth orbit. Then you can use free-fall to assemble the item easily, then send it back down! It's a slam dunk killer app for private space. I'm going to the bank tomorrow morning.

uofacats2004: I have put together a bed, a dresser and sidetable from IKEA and it was amazingly easy. And they are sturdy as all heck and haven't worn down at all.
I'm amazed actually.

The man who can not wear down an IKEA bed needs more practice.

I'm getting a kick out of this thread because i just bought an Ikea bed and assembled it with no problems whatsoever. After my wife bought a piece of crap that was cheaper, and both sets were damaged in shipping, mostly because they seemed to use particle board "bonded" without any bonding agent. At least the Ikea wasn't packaged sawdust.

mrlewish: Hey... ummmm fellas.. I followed them all at once and made this. Should I be scared?
[static.ddmcdn.com image 400x333]

not unless you're an independent contractor...or forgot to ask if there are no weaknesses at all

UsikFark: austin_millbarge: Frustration? A untrained monkey could put that stuff together.

Not all of us can afford monkeys.

To say nothing of finding an untrained one. Most of them are either writing software or fixing cars these days.

I think people who have difficulties putting together Ikea products also have difficulties with Duplo blocks.

Google is your friend: search hacking Ikea

I bought one piece of Ikea, the cheapest billy bookshelf and the cheapest doors. Overall, not bad for under $100. Especially considering the option for a knock-down six foot bookshelf at wal-mart used two pieces to make the uprights.

Some things at Ikea are cool. But I'm a thrift store guy, I'm starting to see what these things look like after a few years of use.

/And I know some seriously posh thrift stores.

Link (new window)

I took a good look at my life
What I saw I didn't like
Cause there was nothing that was built to last
Underneath all the cheap veneer
There's nothing that can stand the years
It all falls apart so fast

Particle board
All the furniture I own is made of particle board
It's all I can afford particle board
Particle board
Is this what I've been working my whole life for?
Four walls and a door particle board

I have to live my life alone
Cause if I ever bring a woman home
She'll take one look at my place and any chance is blown
I guess that I have to admit
A guy looks like he can't commit
When a hex-wrench can dismantle anything he owns

Particle board
If I ever move I'll leave it here on the floor
To move would cose more than my particle board
Particle board
My life sucks and it can't be ignored
All I can afford is particle board

I try to live my life without things that tie me down
That's why I only buy crap I won't miss if I skip town
But now I see I can't live my life like this forever
I'd like to own some furniture I don't have to put together

I took a good look at my life
What I saw I didn't like
It made me wanna run away and hide
Just one look around my home
Shows that everything I own
Is all leaning to one side

Particle board
All the furniture I own is made of particle board
It's all I can afford particle board
Particle board
My life sucks and it can't be ignored
All I can afford is particle board
Particle board
Is this what I've been working my whole life for?
Four walls and a door particle board
Particle board
All the furniture I own is made of particle board
It's all I can afford particle board

More lyrics: http://www.lyricsmania.com/particle_board_lyrics_rob_paravonian.html
All about Rob Paravonian: http://www.musictory.com/music/Rob+Paravonian

mmmmmmmDROP!: [www.ikeafans.com image 353x251]

The Escher always was a biatch to put together.

I just finished redoing the home office per the wife's directions, err request. This should last for five years or until we try to move it.

Glicky: I just finished redoing the home office per the wife's directions, err request. This should last for five years or until we try to move it.

[i.imgur.com image 640x424]

Nice fruity computer case ya have there, francis.

SeedFreak: Glicky: I just finished redoing the home office per the wife's directions, err request. This should last for five years or until we try to move it.

[i.imgur.com image 640x424]

My son got married and when he moved out of the house he left behind almost all his Ikea stuff because you can put it together, but just try taking it apart. Ugh.

We've move 3 times now since get got our Malm bedroom suite, and it's still in pretty good condition. Granted, it's nice to have black/brown since you can just mark up blemishes with a Sharpie, but in terms of screws and structure everything still goes together well. *shrugs*

Also, went to get a 4x4 grid akin to what Glicky posted to help organize the kid's toys at our new place and they were all sold out. Ended up getting two 2x4s and stacked them to hold us over heh.

I remodeled a kitchen a couple of years ago and put in a full set of cabinetry [15 floor and 13 wall] of their Akurum series. They came on 3 pallets, in 143 flat boxes. We had previously stripped the kitchen to studs and redrywalled so we built out from flat walls. It took a three day weekend.

Only thing I did different from the instructions was I anchored the wall cabinets better than their system and leveled the base cabinets by building a single kick platform rather than leveling each cabinet individually.

I have been extremely happy with the quality of the materials and ease of assembly.

This site (pops) has some interesting ikeas, uh, ideas.

/Also, Swedish Meatballs
//bork, bork, bork

mov ax,'00' ; initialize to all ASCII zeroes
mov di,counter ; including the counter
mov cx,digits+cntDigits/2 ; two bytes at a time
cld ; initialize from low to high memory
rep stosw ; write the data
inc ax ; make sure ASCII zero is in al
mov [num1 + digits - 1],al ; last digit is one
mov [num2 + digits - 1],al ;
mov [counter + cntDigits - 1],al

jmp .bottom ; done with initialization, so begin