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(Fark)   Nine years on Fark and not a single greenlight. How much bourbon do I have to send these guys?   (fark.com) divider line 58
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2330 clicks; posted to Main » on 18 Jan 2012 at 8:16 PM (2 years ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2012-01-18 07:29:08 PM
I've been here seven, not a single one. It's more single malt for me tonight.
 
2012-01-18 07:40:43 PM
┌∩┐(◣_◢)┌∩┐
 
2012-01-18 07:41:34 PM
I saw my doctor, and he recommended twisting my sense of humor until it was sprained.

It's worked great so far.
 
2012-01-18 07:44:51 PM
The #1 trick to getting a green on Fark: be funny.
 
2012-01-18 07:59:41 PM

Shostie: ┌∩┐(◣_◢)┌∩┐


Hey you stole that from a guy who stole that from a guy.
/I know this
 
2012-01-18 08:18:56 PM

make me some tea: The #1 trick to getting a green on Fark: be funny.


No, the trick is to lie in the headline and misspell something.
 
2012-01-18 08:19:49 PM
You're not alone.
 
2012-01-18 08:20:25 PM
...But I am now.
 
2012-01-18 08:20:44 PM
I nailed my first one three days after I registered.

My only one though. :(
 
2012-01-18 08:20:53 PM
geez, I've had stuff greenlighted (not even my A material), and I'm not a total farker
 
2012-01-18 08:20:58 PM
┌∩┐(◣_◢)┌∩┐

/stole from some guy
 
2012-01-18 08:21:23 PM
It's never the one that you KNOW will go green.
 
2012-01-18 08:22:50 PM
Been here for 10 years in December (and it is still my most visited site).
Gave up on submitting links 5 years ago.
Haven't updated my profile in 7 years.
Been regretting my anime themed screen name for 9 years.
 
2012-01-18 08:25:04 PM
Clicks on Marcus Aurelius to see profile.

Holy.... ~passes out~
 
2012-01-18 08:26:25 PM
Same thing for me, only on slashdot. Stuff I submitted would show up on the front page with a crappy write-up. Maybe because I sent my submissions on a Windows box, they probably round-file that automatically.
 
2012-01-18 08:27:14 PM
No, no, you're supposed to send the Mods WHISKEY for a greenlight. :P
 
2012-01-18 08:27:15 PM
Be funnier so we can laugh at you. Congrats, you finally broke on through...
 
2012-01-18 08:34:25 PM
You're not alone brother!

/ =[
//And i had a few good headlines too
 
2012-01-18 08:36:43 PM
I don't think I've ever submitted a link, I don't see the big deal, but congrats
 
2012-01-18 08:37:03 PM

MorePeasPlease: You're not alone.


I am here with you.
 
2012-01-18 08:37:36 PM
Congrats on #1. I've been here a year longer than you, and I have 68700% of the number you have--which really isn't that great, but compared to you my internet penis is huuuuuuge!
 
2012-01-18 08:38:40 PM
Yet the link I submitted today didn't go anywhere :(
 
2012-01-18 08:40:13 PM
you'd really be proud of a charity green instead of being remotely clever? ok then...
 
2012-01-18 08:40:20 PM
I think I'm at 67-ish percent. Submitted three, two went all greeny.
 
2012-01-18 08:44:53 PM
Account created: 2003-07-31 17:00:32 and I have never had a green light.
 
2012-01-18 08:45:40 PM
I went over 5 years before even submitting a link.
 
2012-01-18 08:56:15 PM

leeloodallas75: Account created: 2003-07-31 17:00:32 and I have never had a green light.


Welcome to Fark, fresh-face!
 
2012-01-18 08:56:16 PM

make me some tea: The #1 trick to getting a green on Fark: be funny.


Well, yeah, but why do so many straight lines get greenlighted then?
 
2012-01-18 08:57:41 PM
it took me years, but my Farking 14 year old son got his first one greenlit...hell, he had to register in order to submit!
 
2012-01-18 09:05:02 PM
I don't know what the trick is. I've had a lot of lame submissions, but some that were rejected were better than the ones I've had go green. Oh well, 9 isn't really a number worth bragging about.
 
2012-01-18 09:05:51 PM

slotz: make me some tea: The #1 trick to getting a green on Fark: be funny.

Well, yeah, but why do so many straight lines get greenlighted then?


Because they they are linked to good interesting articles.
/that simple
 
2012-01-18 09:05:53 PM
I scored me some greens today. I love our new randomly greening threads overlords. All hail!
 
2012-01-18 09:08:43 PM

AlwaysRightBoy: slotz: make me some tea: The #1 trick to getting a green on Fark: be funny.

Well, yeah, but why do so many straight lines get greenlighted then?

Because they they are linked to good interesting articles.
/that simple


- a 'they' on that
 
2012-01-18 09:10:15 PM

leeloodallas75: Account created: 2003-07-31 17:00:32 and I have never had a green light.


Account created: 2003-05-19 05:22:10
Zero green lights.

What do I win?
 
2012-01-18 09:14:20 PM
Shostie: ┌∩┐(◣_◢)┌∩┐

HAHAHAHAH

Exactly!

/congrats, subby!
 
2012-01-18 09:17:29 PM

shaft6969: you'd really be proud of a charity green instead of being remotely clever? ok then...


Id be proud of a sympathy green.....
 
2012-01-18 09:18:07 PM

AlwaysRightBoy:
Well, yeah, but why do so many straight lines get greenlighted then?
Because they they are linked to good interesting articles.
/that simple


I got a greenlight once with a really interesting article about that kid who stole the planes and was on the run for a couple of years. After it was posted, the article was pulled, and I mean pulled--I couldn't even find it on the website. Is that because of lawyers or something?

The replacement was a farking People magazine article that had a quarter of the information and made many of the comments nonsensical. I was robbed!
 
2012-01-18 09:25:17 PM

AlwaysRightBoy: slotz: make me some tea: The #1 trick to getting a green on Fark: be funny.

Well, yeah, but why do so many straight lines get greenlighted then?

Because they they are linked to good interesting articles.
/that simple


Fair enough.

/had beginner's luck 'bout a year ago. greenlight on the first try. nuthin' since.
 
2012-01-18 09:29:46 PM
Been here since April of 2003.

Got only one greeny in all that time. Gave up trying to submit years ago, because of the lack of approvals. Saw today was "Greenlight Everything", and figured what the hell, and submitted 3 articles.

Yup, not a single green.
 
2012-01-18 09:32:50 PM

cryinoutloud: AlwaysRightBoy:
Well, yeah, but why do so many straight lines get greenlighted then?
Because they they are linked to good interesting articles.
/that simple

I got a greenlight once with a really interesting article about that kid who stole the planes and was on the run for a couple of years. After it was posted, the article was pulled, and I mean pulled--I couldn't even find it on the website. Is that because of lawyers or something?

The replacement was a farking People magazine article that had a quarter of the information and made many of the comments nonsensical. I was robbed!


I once had one that had 57 up-votes by Farkers and was erased from the universe. Some people can't handle the truth.
 
2012-01-18 09:36:17 PM
Fark account number: 5052
Account created: 2001-06-26 11:51:23
Submitted links approved: None


So there...,
 
2012-01-18 09:43:26 PM
I would like to know if anyone has had consecutive days with a green lit.
 
2012-01-18 09:52:11 PM

Altitude5280: I would like to know if anyone has had consecutive days with a green lit.


? maybe...can't remember. Had two in one day once. Virgins, that is.
 
2012-01-18 10:15:00 PM

Altitude5280: I would like to know if anyone has had consecutive days with a green lit.


Yes.
 
2012-01-18 10:29:08 PM

Altitude5280: I would like to know if anyone has had consecutive days with a green lit.


Many, many days. Multiple greens per day. I miss being unemployed.
 
2012-01-18 10:35:13 PM

shaft6969: you'd really be proud of a charity green instead of being remotely clever? ok then...


a/k/a 'two beer queer'
 
2012-01-18 10:40:02 PM

Captain Steroid: No, no, you're supposed to send the Mods WHISKEY for a greenlight. :P


It's not so much that you send whiskey as it is what kind and how much. A few bottles of Woodford Reserve might buy you more green lights than a case of Jim Beam white, but it might not be worth the price. They might be happy with Wild Turkey or Maker's Mark, or you could try with Black Velvet.

Is the point of the fiendish plan to get them drunk and then make them laugh to get the green light?
 
2012-01-18 11:03:03 PM
Is this what it is like to have TF?
 
2012-01-18 11:07:37 PM

Standard Deviant: Is this what it is like to have TF?


Okay, you tempt me ...
 
2012-01-18 11:13:29 PM
Pfft, been here 7, I submit a link once in a while, don't expect it. I enjoy the company, mostly.
 
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