Fark Me To Tears: I'm glad they pointed out that the victim is an "IT expert". I guess this means that he knew exactly what to do when his laptop was stolen.

Chasing after and kicking the shiat out of the thief is one option. Or wait for it to check in with you and call the FBI for a referral to what local agency can help recover it based on the IP address and monitoring the thief's use to get the email and social media login information.

I went with the second option a bunch of times. The FBI has some really nice IC guys.

That pic needs some Six Million Dollar Man sound effects.

Mitchell, Mitchell, Mitchell!

sO, i'VE HAD A NASTY COUGH AND lost my voice the past few days.

I woke up a little bit ago and my mouth tastes like old salami, and when I cough the taste gets stronger.

Is this gangrene, or is it SOPA related?

/so very scared

/serious about the weird taste in my mouth, though

Attention Mr. IT expertard, you're going bald.

And no matter how much you let your hair grow out still won't change the fact

You.

Are.

Going.

Bald.

It doesn't work that way.

lock your car doors

Mister Peejay: sO, i'VE HAD A NASTY COUGH AND lost my voice the past few days.

I woke up a little bit ago and my mouth tastes like old salami, and when I cough the taste gets stronger.

Is this gangrene, or is it SOPA related?

/so very scared

/serious about the weird taste in my mouth, though

Protip: Don't eat salami right before going to bed.

what's a youth?

I Am The Egg Matt Drudge Smears Upon His Body: Attention Mr. IT expertard, you're going bald.

And no matter how much you let your hair grow out still won't change the fact

You.

Are.

Going.

Bald.

I know so many guys who do the same thing. It's so sad and only calls attention to their thinning, receding hairlines. Why do they do it?

The only man who could get away with it was George Carlin, because he was farking George Carlin. But even he eventually cut his hair.

He could have shown who was in better shape more convincingly if he had continued to chase down the thief and kicked the crap out of him.

Just sayin ...

One of my first real jobs was computer sales in a department store in a mall. Got to know one of the security guys. Wiry guy, real nice, watched him catch a few people. Someone would take off out the doors with security in pursuit. He'd just lope along, keeping the robber in site. Most of the time he'd get them in a few minutes and they'd be so tired that sometimes they'd be puking.
/csb

Mister Peejay: sO, i'VE HAD A NASTY COUGH AND lost my voice the past few days.

I woke up a little bit ago and my mouth tastes like old salami, and when I cough the taste gets stronger.

Is this gangrene, or is it SOPA related?

/so very scared

/serious about the weird taste in my mouth, though

Hey there. Try gargling with some warm salt water mixed with a little hydrogen peroxide. Also, if you really want to nip any and all nastiness in the bud, floss and brush your teeth first, then do the warm salt water/peroxide rinse. Follow that with plenty of hot tea with lemon. Should help. And don't be scared. It's probably just a bronchial infection. Get to a doctor or clinic in the next couple days if you don't feel better.

Also, lots of garlic and heavily spiced food should help burn out any sickness.

/not a doctor
//I am a cook, however
///use food as medicine whenever possible
////god, but these slashies can be addictive!

Dadof3: and they'd be so tired that sometimes they'd be puking.
/csb

There was a story like this last year - but it as a 80 year old marathon runner. He simply chased the thief until the thief ended up collapsing - They had to take the crook to the hospital before jail.

Also, there was the one who tried to pull a grab&run a bag from a olympic contestant - a runner at that.

johndalek: lock your car doors

Seriously, who drives with their doors unlocked? My car is 11 years old, and it locks the doors when you pull it out of park.

snarketyfarker: Hey there. Try gargling with some warm salt water mixed with a little hydrogen peroxide. Also, if you really want to nip any and all nastiness in the bud, floss and brush your teeth first, then do the warm salt water/peroxide rinse. Follow that with plenty of hot tea with lemon. Should help. And don't be scared. It's probably just a bronchial infection. Get to a doctor or clinic in the next couple days if you don't feel better.

Also, lots of garlic and heavily spiced food should help burn out any sickness.

/not a doctor
//I am a cook, however
///use food as medicine whenever possible
////god, but these slashies can be addictive!

Thanks for the kind non-snark reply. As it is, I actually have been doing all that.

I feel fine, my voice just isn't happening. I squeak more than talk. Then I try shouting, which irritates my throat, then I start coughing, and my "voice" gets worse...

If I take a sip of coffee first, I can actually talk for three seconds!

There is now a tea and coffee shortage in Cleveland. My fault.

/like an annoyed pissed-off Donald Duck over here

Mister Peejay: snarketyfarker: Hey there. Try gargling with some warm salt water mixed with a little hydrogen peroxide. Also, if you really want to nip any and all nastiness in the bud, floss and brush your teeth first, then do the warm salt water/peroxide rinse. Follow that with plenty of hot tea with lemon. Should help. And don't be scared. It's probably just a bronchial infection. Get to a doctor or clinic in the next couple days if you don't feel better.

Also, lots of garlic and heavily spiced food should help burn out any sickness.

/not a doctor
//I am a cook, however
///use food as medicine whenever possible
////god, but these slashies can be addictive!

Thanks for the kind non-snark reply. As it is, I actually have been doing all that.

I feel fine, my voice just isn't happening. I squeak more than talk. Then I try shouting, which irritates my throat, then I start coughing, and my "voice" gets worse...

If I take a sip of coffee first, I can actually talk for three seconds!

There is now a tea and coffee shortage in Cleveland. My fault.

/like an annoyed pissed-off Donald Duck over here

Best of luck to you. I hate being sick. Another thing I remembered is called a'dragon shot'. Okay, so you take equal parts lemon juice and honey (2-3 T each), freshly chopped garlic (2-3 cloves) and ginger root (peel a piece about as big as your thumb to the first knuckle, then mince it) and however much cayenne powder you can stand (anywhere from 1/4 tsp up to 1 tsp). Now, you can mix that all up together and take it as a shot, or add it to some hot water, and drink it down like a toddy. (hell, if you have a little whiskey or brandy, toss a shot in there too!) Repeat as often as you see fit. You will find yourself very warm, and probably perspiring outright.

Well, hope you feel better. We just got back from running errands and having dinner. Hopefully I get to go to work tomorrow. The snow cost me two days this week already! Cheers, Antonie.