Krymson Tyde: Do you remember in Commando, when John Matrix jumped from the wheel well of that jet when it was several hundred feet off the ground and he landed in that swamp in about a foot of water and not only did he survive, but he didn't suffer multiple breaks and internal injuries and was able to get right up and complete his mission of kicking ass?
That was awesome!

Perhaps they should just start straight up stealing pages from TVtropes

Luke Skywalker was extremely lucky - to have been in the original trilogy. If that isn't luck I don't know what is.

I love how comically inept the local police chief and FBI are in Die Hard.

What actually blew up McClane's C4? The fall? Or the igniters? (What blew up the igniters?) Why was the CRT needed?

McClane didn't get lucky at all. The terrorists took the elevator to the floor where they could shoot at the police "RV". Therefore the c4 (with blasting cap detonators) crt monitor/chair rig would hit the top of the elevator on the floor where it last stopped. Yippee ki yay mother farker.

5 badass movie heroes that had scripts written for things to be badass.


fixed.

/oooh let's watch a movie where they never guess the password.
//suspend your disbelief

The main character from Apocalypto puts all these to shame.

#3. Watchmen -- Nite Owl Guesses Adrian's Password

No, the ultimate password guessing was Aram Fingal's attempt to re-hack Novacorp's computer.

\he was a badass
\\asked his mom about his nuts
\\\I didn't want to bungle or bobble the Fingal dopple

Faint heart never won fair maiden. Sometimes you just gotta say "What the fark?"

MCCLOUD!

HailRobonia: Luke Skywalker was extremely lucky - to have been in the original trilogy. If that isn't luck I don't know what is.

why so lucky? the acting, plotlines, situations and effects are just as bad in the original trilogy as in the new.

case in point - ewoks.

We are all so lucky to have Cracked around to explain the obvious to us. Because none of us have ever understood that movies are make-believe.

List please...

frepnog: HailRobonia: Luke Skywalker was extremely lucky - to have been in the original trilogy. If that isn't luck I don't know what is.

why so lucky? the acting, plotlines, situations and effects are just as bad in the original trilogy as in the new.

case in point - ewoks.

Just as bad? You make an interesting point, and, to counter your argument, go fux yourself. :)

Waiting for Buck Rogers...

/off my lawn

RoyBatty: What actually blew up McClane's C4? The fall? Or the igniters? (What blew up the igniters?) Why was the CRT needed?

Trying to make an action movie make logical sense isn't logical.

You can start with the fact that not only does it take an odd key to open the elevator door (forcing them without destroying them just doesn't happen) and if the safeties are working when you open a hall door the elevator stops moving.

It's still better than being the most inept hero ever.

/two bowels for banjo

Cracked lists really need their own de-motivational poster for how terrible and condescending they are.

The Aladdin trollface was pretty funny though.

Falco09: McClane didn't get lucky at all. The terrorists took the elevator to the floor where they could shoot at the police "RV". Therefore the c4 (with blasting cap detonators) crt monitor/chair rig would hit the top of the elevator on the floor where it last stopped. Yippee ki yay mother farker.

If they took the elevator to the 30th floor, and the chair blew up on top of the elevator, wouldn't it have taken out the 31st floor instead of the one they were on?

Gritty Kitty Litter: The main character from Apocalypto puts all these to shame.

Yeah. That movie was pretty goddamned ridiculous action wise.

Rapmaster2000: [3.bp.blogspot.com image 580x895]

It's still better than being the most inept hero ever.

/two bowels for banjo

That square bugs me! HE REALLY BUGS MEEEE!

If they took the elevator to the 30th floor, and the chair blew up on top of the elevator, wouldn't it have taken out the 31st floor instead of the one they were on?

Let's say it took out both. At least in Die Hard the hero actually got his ass kicked for half the movie.

The biggest plot hole in Die Hard is that Hans would have just started killing hostages, one by one, to force McClane to turn himself over to them. Sure, Hans killed the one douche-bag, but he failed to follow through.

/still love the movie, though

You can't look at Die Hard movies and complain about plot holes. The entire arc of Die Hard, made evident in the most recent one, is that John McClane keeps trying stupid insane shiat. And it works. So he laughs, and tries something even more ridiculous, and it works again.

By the time he gets to Live Free and Die Hard, he's throwing cars at helicopters and just giggling about whatever deity it is that's decided he can pull that shiat off. John McClane can't even take HIMSELF seriously.

Aladdin - While no one in the movie ever thinks to ask the genie for infinite wishes

Did this clown even watch the movie? One of the first things the Genie says after Aladdin releases him from the lamp is "Ix-nay on wishing for more wishes!"

I've never heard of suspension of disbelief. In fact I think all of these movies are fake and shopped.

puckrock2000: Aladdin - While no one in the movie ever thinks to ask the genie for infinite wishes

Did this clown even watch the movie? One of the first things the Genie says after Aladdin releases him from the lamp is "Ix-nay on wishing for more wishes!"

But he doesn't say why, does he? Maybe the genie doesn't want to deal with that noise.

Has no idea what you're talking about.

Impasse: #3. Watchmen -- Nite Owl Guesses Adrian's Password

No, the ultimate password guessing was Aram Fingal's attempt to re-hack Novacorp's computer.

\he was a badass
\\asked his mom about his nuts
\\\I didn't want to bungle or bobble the Fingal dopple

YOU ANTEATER!

How about every James Bond movie ever made, his equipment from Q branch is always perfect for the villain at hand, even when the villain is a former Double O agent.

Conspicuously absent: every James Bond movie ever written

Tom_Slick: How about every James Bond movie ever made, his equipment from Q branch is always perfect for the villain at hand, even when the villain is a former Double O agent.

17 seconds. Goddamnitsomuch. Cheers to you sir.

Krymson Tyde: Do you remember in Commando, when John Matrix jumped from the wheel well of that jet when it was several hundred feet off the ground and he landed in that swamp in about a foot of water and not only did he survive, but he didn't suffer multiple breaks and internal injuries and was able to get right up and complete his mission of kicking ass?
That was awesome!




What I thought of...

JackieRabbit: We are all so lucky to have Cracked around to explain the obvious to us. Because none of us have ever understood that movies are make-believe.

what do you mean? your post makes no sense......

The 300 thing is kinda dumb. IIRC men couldn't own property in Sparta there were no banks and gold currency was outlawed so where was he supposed to keep his gold but on his person, also it's not like she planned to reveal him she was just angry about the buttsecks.

Fish in a Barrel: The biggest plot hole in Die Hard is that Hans would have just started killing hostages, one by one, to force McClane to turn himself over to them. Sure, Hans killed the one douche-bag, but he failed to follow through.

/still love the movie, though

But they weren't terrorists, they were thieves. I'm guessing hostages was a first for them. Remember when Hans had to TELL Carl to shoot the glass? Besides, who DIDN'T want to kill that jerk?

I've never bashed on a Cracked list before, but this one is just pointless. First, it's a list of "Badasses". The list goes from John Mclain (Badass) to Aladdin (whatever) and the entire Ocean's crew (non-vilent con-men)??? Uhm, let's stay on task people.

I'm sure someone has started a worst Cracked list already. I hope this one finds its way there.