That is why my one last question for all GOP candidates is this: If elected president, will you appoint your GOP rivals as a part of your administration, to utilize their skill sets as President Lincoln did with his rivals, in order to unite and restore our republic?

Somehow I don't think that's as significant as what Lincoln did.

Vodka Zombie: clancifer: Today's GOP presidential competitors are a unique blend of gifted and talented people.

[files.sharenator.com image 447x335]

Did he really say that?!?

Jebus... Just how hard was that kick to the head Bruce Lee gave him?

Oh come on...there's the guy with the hair and the smile, the guy with the smile and the hair, The guy wit the toothy smile and the hair, the guy with the shiny hair and teeth...there's so much variety!

/It was a kick so hard, it shattered time in a zone surrounding Chuck Norris, causing him to do such things as become inCREDibly Conservative and promote home gym equipment.

propasaurus: And totally unlike anything Obama would ever do. Like appointing a Republican who would end up running for the Republican nomination, for example.

Not to mention Lincoln came from Illinois, and Obama came from Kenya.

clancifer: Today's GOP presidential competitors are a unique blend of gifted and talented people.

[files.sharenator.com image 447x335]

They are unique, I'll give him that. Just like no 2 turds are ever exactly the same.

It sounds to my like Mr. Norris thinks Mr. Gingrich is what a smart person sounds like.

Modern conservatism and Chuck Norris. Because being really good at roundhouse kicks makes you just as qualified to speak on the philosophy as any other moron who follows it.

TL;DR

Could somebody confirm whether the question is "Have you ever photocopied your penis and sent it to your secretary marked "Special delivery"?

Shut up and kick.

Well let's see....

Give Newt the combined departments of Education and Labor.

Give Santorum Health and Human Services.

RON PAUL as Chairman of the Fed.

Cain said he wants Defense, but I think he'd be better at State, using his smooth, seductive style on our allies.

Abraham Lincoln would spit upon the current incarnation of his Party.

Lincoln was a proto-communist. That's not an insult, it's the reality. He railed against Factory Owners and other big sources of Capital as much as he railed against Plantation owning Slave Masters.

Labor is prior to, and independent of, capital. Capital is only the fruit of labor, and could never have existed if labor had not first existed. Labor is the superior of capital, and deserves much the higher consideration - Abraham Lincoln

He could also see the future, apparently...

I see in the near future a crisis approaching that unnerves me and cause me to tremble for safety of my country; corporations have been enthroned, an era of corruption in High Places will follow, and the Money Power of the country will endeavor to prolong its reign by working upon the prejudices of the People, until the wealth is aggregated in a few hands, and the Republic destroyed. - Abraham Lincoln, letter to Col. William F. Elkins, Nov. 21, 1864

Why do you think some of these guys are still in the race Chuck? To blackmail the front runner into sweet gigs in his admin.

DeltaPunch: PizzaJedi81: Oh come on...there's the guy with the hair and the smile, the guy with the smile and the hair, The guy wit the toothy smile and the hair, the guy with the shiny hair and teeth...there's so much variety!

Didn't you hear the new? The guy with the smile and the hair just dropped out and endorsed the guy with the shiny hair and the teeth!

Oh, son of a biatch...where does that leave the guy with the big teeth and the shiny hair?

In other news, Chuck Norris read a book. And of course, if a Republican wins in 2012, he would want that person to appoint lots of Democrats right?

AmorousRedDragon: That is why my one last question for all GOP candidates is this: If elected president, will you appoint your GOP rivals as a part of your administration, to utilize their skill sets as President Lincoln did with his rivals, in order to unite and restore our republic?

Somehow I don't think that's as significant as what Lincoln did.

Well, Bush already filled most of the Lincoln checklist, with suspending Habeus Corpus, attempting to cut off the press, throwing half the country into a separatist fit, and starting an ill-conceived war on the promise that it'd be over in "months at most". Oh, and cripple most of the US economy for decades following his administration.

That doesn't leave much to the current GOP guys.

//Not that he didn't do some things well also, but lionizing Lincoln makes about as much sense as lionizing JFK. Mediocre presidents get assassinated too, man.

Every time this guys opens his mouth, he ruins his legacy. He is an internet meme and should remain that way.

Man, Chuck Norris. I wish whoever started that meme realized what sort of pants-on-head crazy would result.

I gotta give it to the guy, though, he's managed to turn his brief return to glory into a paying gig, since WingNut Daily hasn't figured out that the kids aren't telling each other Chuck Norris jokes any more.

AmorousRedDragon: That is why my one last question for all GOP candidates is this: If elected president, will you appoint your GOP rivals as a part of your administration, to utilize their skill sets as President Lincoln did with his rivals, in order to unite and restore our republic?

Somehow I don't think that's as significant as what Lincoln did.

That was actually the question? Will Romney put Bachmann in his cabinet?

/no, but he'll put Marcus in the closet...
//rimshot

Jim_Callahan: Well, Bush already filled most of the Lincoln checklist, with suspending Habeus Corpus, attempting to cut off the press, throwing half the country into a separatist fit, and starting an ill-conceived war on the promise that it'd be over in "months at most". Oh, and cripple most of the US economy for decades following his administration.

Lincoln did neither of those.

"I think [Abraham] Lincoln was very wise, as was captured in a book called 'Team of Rivals,' in actually developing literally everybody who [was] his opponent ended up in the [presidential] cabinet"

Wow. Just.... wow.

NachoPitt: Every time this guys opens his mouth, he ruins his legacy.

Getting his ass kicked in a movie with Bruce Lee?

"Today's GOP presidential competitors are a unique blend of gifted and talented people."

--Is this the PC way to say they are retarded , or "special" or "Palin Americans" or what ever the term is these days , because i have heard similar description of Special Ed. kids -

Fart_Machine: NachoPitt: Every time this guys opens his mouth, he ruins his legacy.

Getting his ass kicked in a movie with Bruce Lee?

Yeah, I know...it's a great legacy to have, isn't it? I wouldn't mind having been kicked in the head by Bruce Lee.

I met Chuck Norris once. He's really short.

I've nothing further to add.

A big question everyone is missing: how did Obama not do exactly what Norris is talking about? He had only one real rival in the Democratic nomination, and he put her in as the Secretary of farking State.

Also, you know, he completely missed the whole point of the rivals thing. To do it like Lincoln in this regard, Romney wouldn't just have to give Santorum a job; he would have to give Obama one. It wasn't about having slightly different view-points. It was about having totally different positions to appease as many people as possible. (We all see how well that worked.)

I've got some bad news for you Chuck. The GOP have spent the last 20 years using a scorched earth strategy to beat the Democrats, it was only a matter of time before they started using it on each other.

Goodwin'ed in the third paragraph.

President Obama should appoint some people that think he's too conservative to cabinet posts.

A couple of open gays, a couple of open Muslims, a couple of open socialists, a couple of open atheists.

Make a pacifist SecDef, find somebody that's been utterly screwed (yet somehow alive) by the legal system and put them in charge of the justice department. Have somebody that lost their job and home to a merger run the SEC.

The only thing that keeps the GOP in play is that both parties are so conservative.