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(Some Bearded Guy) Silly La Grange man trapped in car wash for 36 hours, HAW HAW HAW   (kinston.com) divider line 53
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4919 clicks; posted to Main » on 12 Jan 2012 at 11:55 AM   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»   |    Get this fabulous T-Shirt and impress the methane out of your friends! shirt it!



53 Comments   (+0 »)
   
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stpauler [TotalFark]
2012-01-12 09:14:20 AM
That article is full of some awesome quotes

That C-note I put in there looked like Larry King after a hot shower and it nearly ripped my hand off when it sucked it in.

"I put a Tanya Tucker tape in the stereo, rared the seat back and took an incredible nap."


"Then the soapy water started up again and scared the oatmeal right out of me."

"I've never been so happy to see the five-oh come up behind me," Leonard said. "I tried to ditch my Lipitor and Viagra simply out of habit."

"The way I figure it, I won't need a car wash for at least three years," Leonard said. "It feels good to be ahead of the game."


Seriously, let's sponsor this guy to totalfark.
 
elvisaintdead [TotalFark]
2012-01-12 09:20:04 AM
elmore leonard...harlan...wynonna...

you get the picture. purty damn funny, tho'
 
Diogenes [TotalFark]
2012-01-12 09:48:08 AM
I hope I have as much spark and with at 89.
 
gopher321 [TotalFark]
2012-01-12 10:23:54 AM
That's gotta be a satire/comedy article, right? Right?

.
.

Right?
 
dahmers love zombie [TotalFark]
2012-01-12 10:24:26 AM
Writer is trying out for a gig on Hee Haw, apparently.
 
BillCo [TotalFark]
2012-01-12 10:29:36 AM
Has ZZ Top been notified?
 
brigid_fitch [TotalFark]
2012-01-12 10:47:28 AM
gopher321: That's gotta be a satire/comedy article, right? Right?

.
.

Right?

His other columns definitely look like an attempt at satire/comedy.
 
Dead for Tax Reasons [TotalFark]
2012-01-12 11:25:20 AM
brigid_fitch: gopher321: That's gotta be a satire/comedy article, right? Right?

.
.

Right?

His other columns definitely look like an attempt at satire/comedy.

emphesis on the attempt part
 
stpauler [TotalFark]
2012-01-12 11:37:34 AM
Dead for Tax Reasons: brigid_fitch: gopher321: That's gotta be a satire/comedy article, right? Right?

.
.

Right?

His other columns definitely look like an attempt at satire/comedy.

emphesis on the attempt part

Now I'm pissed.
 
BostonEMT
2012-01-12 12:04:41 PM
I always thought it went "aHOW HOW HOW HOW"....
 
endtimethirtyfour
2012-01-12 12:04:58 PM
...I read that as a Jack Chick HAW HAW HAW
 
Savage Bacon
2012-01-12 12:12:57 PM
One time I went to this topless carwash...

... they had a lot of nice girls-a.


/have mercy
 
Loaf's Tray
2012-01-12 12:13:13 PM
But now, you might be mistaken...
 
bidness
2012-01-12 12:13:22 PM
They got a lot of nice girls there....
 
Fireproof
2012-01-12 12:14:21 PM
brigid_fitch: gopher321: That's gotta be a satire/comedy article, right? Right?

.
.

Right?

His other columns definitely look like an attempt at satire/comedy.

This article is in a weird spot where it's too good to be true, but not quite good enough to be false.
 
Rik01 [TotalFark]
2012-01-12 12:20:52 PM
I had to check the name of the paper to make sure it wasn't the Onion after I read that.

It was amusing, but after I got done smiling I called shenanigans.

Reason: Never seen an automated car wash which will let you punch in the number of cycles.

Never seen one that doesn't require you to move foreword and exit after the cycle. They shut down if you don't.

36 hours is over a day and a night, meaning someone would have come to use the car wash and if the guy leaned on his horn, he would have attracted attention.

Also, he'd have to pee furiously after several hours.

Then, there's the change machine itself. Those things will not take $100 bill. Actually, in most cases, you nearly have to force them to take a $5.00.

However, it was a funny story.
 
No Such Agency
2012-01-12 12:20:53 PM
i.imgur.com
 
jmadisonbiii
2012-01-12 12:23:15 PM
Look like something from America's Finest News SourceTM
 
ObscureNameHere
2012-01-12 12:23:55 PM
BostonEMT: I always thought it went "aHOW HOW HOW HOW"....

This. Subby needs to listen up.
 
Mojojeff
2012-01-12 12:27:19 PM
Good thing he had put his weekend teeth in!!
 
cleek
2012-01-12 12:27:50 PM
"They got a lot of nice girls there...."

no, they don't. they have a bunch of trailers, though.
 
AlbinosRPeople2
2012-01-12 12:27:59 PM
I like that talk. When you talk like that.

scrat.hellocotton.com
 
rebelman233
2012-01-12 12:28:42 PM
True or false I love this story. Also getting a kick since I work at a car wash. It is true when standing in the car wash bay on a busey day wearing hearing protection it does rock you to sleep. Any of you farkers in the rochester ny area come to the irondequoit delta sonic and you may see me fall asleep in the wash and you can laff at me
 
Odd Bird
2012-01-12 12:29:41 PM
FTA: "I tried to call 911 on my cell phone but forgot the number," Leonard said.

Uh, wut? Sounds lik BS, or satire (as hypothesized above).

No Such Agency: [i.imgur.com image 600x431]

golfclap.jpg
 
hitlersbrain
2012-01-12 12:32:56 PM
/Shiver
Just reading that gives me flash-backs to the time I was stranded on a mall escalator for an entire Christmas holiday!
 
susler
2012-01-12 12:34:51 PM
Story's clearly a fake, but funny nonetheless.

I eschew automated car washes preferring to wait until the local high school girls are running one as a benefit for something or other.
 
carrion_luggage [TotalFark]
2012-01-12 12:36:14 PM
He later sued over such shammy treatment.
 
Loaf's Tray
2012-01-12 12:37:12 PM
rebelman233: True or false I love this story. Also getting a kick since I work at a car wash. It is true when standing in the car wash bay on a busey day wearing hearing protection it does rock you to sleep. Any of you farkers in the rochester ny area come to the irondequoit delta sonic and you may see me fall asleep in the wash and you can laff at me

upload.wikimedia.org

EVERY DAY is a Busey day, biatch!
 
MBooda
2012-01-12 12:37:28 PM
Well no wonder. If it was a Lagrangian car wash, the car's wave function would have achieved a stable eigenmode while cycling through when its momentum became conserved. The only way the poor guy could have escaped was to introduce a foreign tensor into the gauge covariant.

/at least, that's the rumor spreadin' 'round
 
SPLAMM
2012-01-12 12:38:16 PM
AlbinosRPeople2: I like that talk. When you talk like that.

[scrat.hellocotton.com image 243x165]

That Baby talk.
 
Dr Dreidel
2012-01-12 12:44:26 PM
MBooda: Well no wonder. If it was a Lagrangian car wash, the car's wave function would have achieved a stable eigenmode while cycling through when its momentum became conserved. The only way the poor guy could have escaped was to introduce a foreign tensor into the gauge covariant.

/at least, that's the rumor spreadin' 'round

*zzzzzzzip*

Go on...

// I put on my supercollider hat
 
CarpeScrotum
2012-01-12 12:45:57 PM
When he finally got out of the car wash it was so bright he had to go out and buy some cheap sunglasses.
 
rebelman233
2012-01-12 12:48:24 PM
Loaf's Tray: rebelman233: True or false I love this story. Also getting a kick since I work at a car wash. It is true when standing in the car wash bay on a busey day wearing hearing protection it does rock you to sleep. Any of you farkers in the rochester ny area come to the irondequoit delta sonic and you may see me fall asleep in the wash and you can laff at me



EVERY DAY is a Busey day, biatch!

+1 to you I can't spell to save my life to begin with that was awesome for a laugh
 
Dimensio [TotalFark]
2012-01-12 12:50:34 PM
endtimethirtyfour: ...I read that as a Jack Chick HAW HAW HAW

The scarcity of Jack Chick references in this discussion disturbs me.

tcj.com
 
eddyatwork
2012-01-12 01:04:07 PM
i1138.photobucket.com
 
elvisaintdead [TotalFark]
2012-01-12 01:12:15 PM
Loaf's Tray: EVERY DAY is a Busey day, biatch!

Words to live by. Words. To. Live. By.
 
maimzini [TotalFark]
2012-01-12 01:54:43 PM
I call bollocks

There's no listing for a Harlan's Car Washing in LaGrange, NC
There's no listing for an Elmore Leonard in LaGrange, NC
There's no Wynona Street in LaGrange, NC
There IS an Echo Drive

Least that's what a quick search turned up. Anyone else?
 
Scurvy Dog
2012-01-12 01:56:38 PM
Good morning world.
Good morning to you-a-hoo-hoo-hoo
I'm wearin' my Levis, Le-he-he-he-he-vis
Le-he-he-he-vis
HAW HAW
Le-he-he-he-vis
HAW HAW
Le-he-he-he-vis
HAW HAW
Le-he-he-he-he-vis
Bright shining world.
I'm ready for you-a-hoo-hoo-hoo
I'm wearin' my Levis, Le-he-he-he-he-vis
Le-he-he-he-vis
HAW HAW
Le-he-he-he-vis
HAW HAW
Le-he-he-he-vis
HAW HAW
Le-he-he-he-he-vis

/you're welcome
 
umad
2012-01-12 02:06:24 PM
bidness: They got a lot of nice girlsuh there....

FTFY
 
Nobunny Snowhare [TotalFark]
2012-01-12 02:21:51 PM
Is this some sort of marketing for the new season of Justified?
 
darkfyre
2012-01-12 02:27:48 PM
cute story, but awfully fake-sounding
 
Lorelle [TotalFark]
2012-01-12 03:25:30 PM
Scurvy Dog: Good morning world.
Good morning to you-a-hoo-hoo-hoo
I'm wearin' my Levis, Le-he-he-he-he-vis
Le-he-he-he-vis
HAW HAW
Le-he-he-he-vis
HAW HAW
Le-he-he-he-vis
HAW HAW...

Oh gosh, I actually remember that commercial.

and yes, it's A-HOW HOW HOW HOW, Subby
 
Scurvy Dog
2012-01-12 03:33:11 PM
Lorelle: Scurvy Dog: Good morning world.
Good morning to you-a-hoo-hoo-hoo
I'm wearin' my Levis, Le-he-he-he-he-vis
Le-he-he-he-vis
HAW HAW
Le-he-he-he-vis
HAW HAW
Le-he-he-he-vis
HAW HAW...

Oh gosh, I actually remember that commercial.

and yes, it's A-HOW HOW HOW HOW, Subby

I would link it if I wasn't at work.

/youtube and all other streaming (except from vendor/client sites) is blocked
 
tuxq
2012-01-12 03:43:37 PM
4.bp.blogspot.com

/can we get some more legs plz?
 
eepapapee [TotalFark]
2012-01-12 04:44:27 PM
Scurvy Dog: Good morning world.
Good morning to you-a-hoo-hoo-hoo
I'm wearin' my Levis, Le-he-he-he-he-vis
Le-he-he-he-vis
HAW HAW
Le-he-he-he-vis
HAW HAW
Le-he-he-he-vis
HAW HAW
Le-he-he-he-he-vis
Bright shining world.
I'm ready for you-a-hoo-hoo-hoo
I'm wearin' my Levis, Le-he-he-he-he-vis
Le-he-he-he-vis
HAW HAW
Le-he-he-he-vis
HAW HAW
Le-he-he-he-vis
HAW HAW
Le-he-he-he-he-vis

/you're welcome

I remember that.
 
imprimere
2012-01-12 05:12:28 PM
They screw ya in the drive-thru!

Uhm, yeah. I was just in here a minute ago. I ordered the satire special. As you can plainly see, they didn't give me any funny at all with this order!
 
jjbinsf
2012-01-12 05:53:06 PM
Sweet pickles!!! It's kangaroo.
 
Benjimin_Dover
2012-01-12 06:05:33 PM
First thing I thought of...

HAW.......HAW........HAW

www.morethings.com
 
danno_to_infinity
2012-01-12 07:32:43 PM
Let's see if this can get an honorable mention in the HOTY, this is a great one

I hear it's tight
most ev'ry night
well, now, I may be mistaken

haw haw haw
 
SomeOldDude
2012-01-12 08:05:21 PM
You what I'm talkin' 'bout...
 
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