Liter Cola

and all the other references from Super Troopers.

ok, now that its out of the way we can have a real discussion.

If this cop is so upset by this, he shouldn't have a badge. If he's so emotionally fragile, how the hell does he perform in the field?

I'm calling Shenanigans

Shenanigans!

Do we have Liter Cola?

THEY freaking USED DNA testing. What the hell. what a waste of tax payer money. Hell where i live the want dig the bullets out of a wall unless someone was actually hit during the robbery. No Fancy BS tests.

gregoropolis: THEY freaking USED DNA testing. What the hell. what a waste of tax payer money. Hell where i live the want dig the bullets out of a wall unless someone was actually hit during the robbery. No Fancy BS tests.

Not only that, but down here in Cali the cop would have gone all "Rodney King" on the perp's ass.

gregoropolis: THEY freaking USED DNA testing. What the hell. what a waste of tax payer money. Hell where i live the want dig the bullets out of a wall unless someone was actually hit during the robbery. No Fancy BS tests.

In some states it's a felony to tamper with an officer's food like this. And they tend to like nailing people to the wall when it's one of their own.

So Super Troopers 2 is due out in what, 2012?

Same with Kung-Fu Hustle 2.

buckler: "The workers there gave him an "uneasy feeling," which proved correct when he pealed back the Whopper's top bun..."

How do you cause a bun to ring? I hate online journalism so goddamned much.

Victim of spellcheck, man. Be glad it's online journalism... you can email them about it politely and they'll change it.
If it were in print you'd have to endure it.... FOREVER.

Ken VeryBigLiar: gregoropolis: THEY freaking USED DNA testing. What the hell. what a waste of tax payer money. Hell where i live the want dig the bullets out of a wall unless someone was actually hit during the robbery. No Fancy BS tests.

In some states it's a felony to tamper with an officer's food like this. And they tend to like nailing people to the wall when it's one of their own.

And I don't blame them for trying to find out who is potentially spreading hepatitis or other diseases.

Ken VeryBigLiar: gregoropolis: THEY freaking USED DNA testing. What the hell. what a waste of tax payer money. Hell where i live the want dig the bullets out of a wall unless someone was actually hit during the robbery. No Fancy BS tests.

In some states it's a felony to tamper with an officer's food like this. And they tend to like nailing people to the wall when it's one of their own.

StoneColdAtheist: gregoropolis: THEY freaking USED DNA testing. What the hell. what a waste of tax payer money. Hell where i live the waont dig the bullets out of a wall unless someone was actually hit during the robbery. No Fancy BS tests.

Not only that, but down here in Cali the cop would have gone all "Rodney King" on the perp's ass.

Um, you need to move.

DNA testing showed employee Gary Herb to be the source of the sputum. Herb was sentenced to 90 days in jail after pleading guilty to a related assault charge.


You know what though? If you have to go to county jail, your reason for incarceration would probably buy you a couple of chuckles and just enough respect to keep people off your back for the first few days at least.

That is, until you fall asleep face down in the grass in the exercise yard and the other inmates get an eye full of your taught ass, sheathed in the too-tight orange jump suit you're wearing because they were out of your size. Your bulbous buttocks jutting jauntily in the air and slowly pulsating as you snore peacefully. And you...um...I mean they....You know what? I better stop right there.
/Fark you! I like girls!

You have to spit either between the meat patties or under the cheese before melting. Nobody looks there.....so I've heard.

ongoing emotional trauma from the incident

he never ate it so why is he so bent out of shape about it??

definite shenanigans. a real cop would have tore through burger world until they found their clown and took them 'downtown' for some personal quality one on one time.

In high school, my girlfriend and I went to a twenty-four-hour Whataburger drive thru in Grapevine, TX. I placed our orders and pulled up to pay and get our food. The guy at the window looked past me and at my girlfriend. She didn't say a word but I felt an uneasy tension in the air. After a seemingly eternal moment, the guy closed the window and disappeared in the back. He was gone for over five minutes. When he came back with our bag of food, he had a snide look and half smile. "Here you go," he said. I took the food and got back on the highway.

"What the hell was that about?" I asked.
"That was my ex-boyfriend," she said.
I'd only lived there for six months, so I didn't have the context of her past.
"No shiat? Well, I guess we better through the food out," I said.
"Why?"
"Come on, he was gone for like five minutes. I'm sure he spit in it or jerked off on it or wiped his ass with the buns."
Her face got a look of a lot perverse fantasy.
"He wouldn't do that. I'm not throwing mine away."
"Suit yourself," I said, "I'm not eating it."

We pulled down the gravel road to the marina. It was dark and deserted and our favorite spot for getting it on. With the bag of food still on the floorboard, we start making out, heavily petting each other, getting into it. I got her jeans and panties off, and then she turned around to let me stick it in sideways doggie style. I put on a rubber and then go to town, working her over hard and slow. As we get deeper into it, she starts sliding down toward the floor mat, but I'm pounding away with such abandon that I'm not paying attention to her head.

I didn't even hear the crinkle of the bag opening or the burger being unwrapped. I looked down, getting pretty close to busting. She's french kissing the hamburger, deep, her spit and his phlegm dripping down her chin. I shoved her off.

"What the fark are you doing?!"
"Oh god, don't stop," she said, the burger gripped in both hands.

I didn't want to blue ball myself, so I stuck it back into the wet drippings. She went back to passionately kissing the hamburger. In the dim of the dash light, I could see the grease and spit glistening on her cheek and chin. With a few last, hard pumps, I filled up the rubber, and as I finished, she crammed the burger in her mouth, took a huge bite, and swallowed.

It was the weirdest threesome I've ever had.

Louisiana_Sitar_Club: DNA testing showed employee Gary Herb to be the source of the sputum. Herb was sentenced to 90 days in jail after pleading guilty to a related assault charge.


You know what though? If you have to go to county jail, your reason for incarceration would probably buy you a couple of chuckles and just enough respect to keep people off your back for the first few days at least.

That is, until you fall asleep face down in the grass in the exercise yard and the other inmates get an eye full of your taught ass, sheathed in the too-tight orange jump suit you're wearing because they were out of your size. Your bulbous buttocks jutting jauntily in the air and slowly pulsating as you snore peacefully


Settle down Beavis! It's just county/municipal time.
The summer camp that my brother and I were exiled to during the summers was much rougher than most local jails. The food was about the same though...

When I turned 15, I got my first job at what was called Showbiz Pizza (a Chuck E. ripoff - not sure if still around). Anyway, I worked on the line with some 17 year-old, Will. Anyway, one night some cop came in with his family, and Will recognized the officer as one who had given him a recent speeding ticket. He did things to this man's family's pizza I don't even want to describe. Spit. Smegma. You name it.

I knew what he was doing was wrong, but at the time I was too timid to stand up to Will, who I was trying to impress the way most kids try to gain favor with the older crowd. So I sat and watched the cop and his whole family eat the boogers disguised in Italian sausage and the ball grease wiped on the crust - while saying nothing. I even fake-laughed as Will and some other workers were back-slapping me and the others in laughter.

It was a humiliating and influential moment in my life, and soon after I decided that I was never going to stand by and let someone innocent be farked with without raising my voice, or even my fists if necessary. I lost sleep for weeks just replaying the image of the cop's kids eating that pizza. I mean, let's assume for the sake of argument that the cop was indeed a dick...why would you punish his wife and kids? Even a barely 15 year-old kid knows this is wrong.

Will was eventually fired for using drugs on the property, and I'm assuming he turned into a lifelong loser.

I know it's fashionable to hate on cops around here, but I'm all for nailing this bozo to the wall. If he's going to do this to a cops food, what makes you think he won't do it to you for any reason he damn well pleases?

Several years ago, my dad (who is a cop) took us to a Chuck E. Cheese rip-off called "Showbiz Pizza".
He recognized a kid behind the counter as someone he had recently ticketed for speeding.
We put in our orders, and waited.

Well, my cousin also worked there and he took my dad aside. He told my dad (who told me later) that the crew there spat in the food and did all kinds of disgusting stuff to it. My dad wanted to report it to the company and arrest him (being a cop), but my cousin calmed him down and said not to worry, and that he would get us clean food and also take care of the people who did it.

My cousin told me later that he saved the tainted food in the freezer, and a couple of days later told the guys who did it that it was an order that nobody picked up, and that they could have it for free.
Turns out, they mistakenly gave it to some younger kid who worked there named Alex, instead of the main guy who did it. But oh well.

He should be thankful it wasn't this broad from an earlier thread.

Who wants a mustache ride?

Eirik: I know it's fashionable to hate on cops around here, but I'm all for nailing this bozo to the wall. If he's going to do this to a cops food, what makes you think he won't do it to you for any reason he damn well pleases?

I'm also in agreement, but the guy who did it isn't the one being sued here. That's the real problem.

The cop is suing Burger King for emotional distress, basically claiming that Burger King owes him money because their employee was a jerk. The criminal charges have already been handled - this is a civil suit. In this article, the shyster representing the cop is claiming all sorts of things:

- Burger King colluded with the employee, by recommending that the employee not be tested for hepatits
- The cop has been unable to eat anything other than home prepared meals, suffers insomnia, and worries about contracting hepatitis or other food-borne diseases.
- The cop is "haunted" because this wasn't his first trip to this particular Burger King.

The civil suit is a way of extracting money from Burger King. Nothing more.

Mr. Potatoass: [i.dailymail.co.uk image 233x423]

He should be thankful it wasn't this broad from an earlier thread.

Damn it, the "double Whopper with cheese and tumor" image was not something I needed in my head...

video man: I'm willing to bet a lot of cops eat their weight in spit from restaurants.

The ones I know have a good idea where to go and when something's up.

There's no one I'm nicer to than the people taking my food order.

I dont give them any of that, "if I wanted fries, I would have asked for them" crap.

Just a lot of "thank yous and pleases", with a smile and friendly eye contact in hopes that they'll recognize my own humanity.

The job must suck hard and they sure dont need me making it even worse.

KillAllHumans: Liter Cola

and all the other references from Super Troopers.

ok, now that its out of the way we can have a real discussion.

You at least have to admit this is a good pic to post:

Eirik: I know it's fashionable to hate on cops around here, but I'm all for nailing this bozo to the wall. If he's going to do this to a cops food, what makes you think he won't do it to you for any reason he damn well pleases?

It's only the idiots who hate cops on general principle. And you have to remember that when the cops make Fark headlines, it's because they farked up royally. So naturally, you're going to see a lot of hate.

I live in a town with one of the most vicious and corrupt departments in America (NOPD). Just recently we convicted multiple officers for the murders of civilians trying to cross a bridge during Katrina. If you've read even the national news at any point in the last 30 years, you know just how low the NOPD can sink.

But -

I don't assign that same disdain to all cops on the force. Most of these folks are just people looking for a good government job that pays a pension and great benefits. They wake up and shiat/shower/shave like anyone else, and just want to come back home to their families. Yeah, it irritates me when certain Farkers make disparaging statements about LEOs who haven't even been convicted of anything yet, but it's kinda hard to blame them for being cynical given the wealth of fodder they have to be angry about.

I do get angry at stupid hipster douchenozzle and hippie Farkers who automatically respond with "pigs" as a blanket remark about cops in general. To me, that invalidates any further discussion in the same way some asshole calling Obama a radical socialist who hates America does. I understand the frustration, but hating on all cops isn't the solution. Who you gonna call the next time you're the victim of a crime? The Decemberists?

/not a cop, nor from a cop family
//among the libtardiest regular Fark posters
///still doesn't understand the rampant cop hate

Begoggle: Several years ago, my dad (who is a cop) took us to a Chuck E. Cheese rip-off called "Showbiz Pizza".

HOLY SH*T - did you read my post just above yours?

StoneColdAtheist: gregoropolis: THEY freaking USED DNA testing. What the hell. what a waste of tax payer money. Hell where i live the want dig the bullets out of a wall unless someone was actually hit during the robbery. No Fancy BS tests.

Not only that, but down here in Cali the cop would have gone all "Rodney King" on the perp's ass.

True... Kelly Thomas was murdered by Fullerton PD for much much less.

KrispyKritter: definite shenanigans. a real cop would have tore through burger world until they found their clown and took them 'downtown' for some personal quality one on one time.

Probably would just get busy with them in the bathroom

spentmiles: words

dickfreckle: Begoggle: Several years ago, my dad (who is a cop) took us to a Chuck E. Cheese rip-off called "Showbiz Pizza".

HOLY SH*T - did you read my post just above yours?

no harm, no foul

buckler: "The workers there gave him an "uneasy feeling," which proved correct when he pealed back the Whopper's top bun..."

How do you cause a bun to ring? I hate online journalism so goddamned much.

You know how I know you don't have any real problems?