FARK.com: (6872514) If you need ideas for the bedroom tonight, do you c) ask a German football team?

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		If you need ideas for the bedroom tonight, do you c) ask a German football team? (guardian.co.uk)		54
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8818 clicks; posted to Main » on 11 Jan 2012 at 3:06 PM | Favorite | share:

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54 Comments (+0 »)

View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest

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bobbette

2012-01-11 01:49:31 PM

Ask them what, to come over?

OK.

miss diminutive

2012-01-11 02:12:33 PM

The club's coach, Mirko Slomka, said he had already completed the 128 questions, and the players were free to see his responses if they wanted.

Slomka told Bild: "With this test I know how I can best reach around each player."

FTFY
NTTAWWT

A Fark Handle

2012-01-11 02:24:31 PM

don't we already have the internet for that?

Treygreen13

2012-01-11 03:07:46 PM

Looks like the questions just want to know if they're motivated by sex, not what sorts of weird things they do in the bedroom.

Dumski

2012-01-11 03:10:46 PM

Hannover's assistant coaches:
Ben Dover
Phil McCraken

/I know

thompsonius

2012-01-11 03:12:09 PM

do they involve THIS German football team?

2media.nowpublic.net

Pants full of macaroni!!

2012-01-11 03:12:09 PM

Do the Cleveland Steamer, or try the Donkey Punch
The old Egyptian Teabag could be the perfect lunch
She'll love the Gaylord Perry or the old Rusty Trombone
And the German Knuckle Cake will really make her moan

Cagey B

2012-01-11 03:12:39 PM

Why would I ask a German such a thing? I find scat disgusting.

sammichtester

2012-01-11 03:13:42 PM

Say What?

Evil Mackerel

2012-01-11 03:16:14 PM

thompsonius: do they involve THIS German football team?

[2media.nowpublic.net image 382x476]I hope they are a tag team.

Gaseous Anomaly

2012-01-11 03:17:38 PM

Must... not... mention... subby's... mom...

Tax Boy

2012-01-11 03:17:58 PM

Debbie Does Dusseldorf?

cowgirl toffee

2012-01-11 03:18:07 PM

German's ideas about sex and football are SO in line with mine.

LeroyBourne

2012-01-11 03:18:37 PM

Yes, I'm sure they'll all take that survey with the utmost respect and answer all questions with 100% thoughtfulness and truth.

Chupacabra Sandwich

2012-01-11 03:20:14 PM

I bet Steve Cherundolo is a wierdo in the bedroom

frepnog

2012-01-11 03:22:33 PM

thompsonius: do they involve THIS German football team?

[2media.nowpublic.net image 382x476]

holy. crap.

asmodeus224

2012-01-11 03:23:54 PM

Over/under on the number of times 'feces' appears in the responses anyone?

JackieRabbit

2012-01-11 03:24:45 PM

"Well, coach, since you are asking... You know in the locker room after practice, when all these meaty boyz hit the showers? (shudders, eyes roll back) Heaven, pure heaven. Especially Kurt. He's such a beast! He can be my number 69 any day!"

asmodeus224

2012-01-11 03:25:03 PM

thompsonius: do they involve THIS German football team?

[2media.nowpublic.net image 382x476]

I'll take the one on the right,....oh and the one on the left....aaaaand the three in the middle. hell, toss in the fence too.

TheKnownUniverse

2012-01-11 03:29:05 PM

Yet when I ask those questions of footballers I get slapped with restraining orders and my Twitter account banned. It's for science, I swear.

I_Can't_Believe_it's_not_Boutros

2012-01-11 03:30:34 PM

Yeah, I'm going to ask soccer players about scoring.

MBooda

2012-01-11 03:30:44 PM

bobbette
Ask them what, to ~~come~~ roll over?

FTFY

Lone Stranger

2012-01-11 03:33:10 PM

If only Penn State had asked these questions.

MBooda

2012-01-11 03:33:34 PM

Tax Boy: Debbie Does Dusseldorf?

And that is why they call me Rolf.

/you know which other German had ideas?

here to help

2012-01-11 03:36:40 PM

Then they eat da poo poo.

Jetty Cat Army

2012-01-11 03:44:02 PM

Tax Boy: Debbie Does Dusseldorf?

Curse my metal body, I wasn't fast enough!

Voted "Funny" for you, though...

Wellon Dowd

2012-01-11 03:45:54 PM

Doesn't need any help from German :footballers".

i269.photobucket.com

Adolf Oliver Nipples

2012-01-11 04:00:46 PM

It's a lady getting pooed on!

/What the fark is wrong with German people?

redmid17

2012-01-11 04:00:48 PM

cowgirl toffee: German's ideas about sex and football are SO in line with mine.

German porn and German soccer (at least the national team) are about as counter to each other as things can be.

cowgirl toffee

2012-01-11 04:05:11 PM

redmid17: cowgirl toffee: German's ideas about sex and football are SO in line with mine.

German porn and German soccer (at least the national team) are about as counter to each other as things can be.

You lie!
:P

Cajnik

2012-01-11 04:12:32 PM

frepnog: holy. crap.

It's from Playboy NSFW Obvously

Julie Cochrane

2012-01-11 04:14:41 PM

You can keep the Germans, send me the British footballers, there's a luv...

/not into poop
//don't wait up

Cajnik

2012-01-11 04:16:10 PM

cowgirl toffee: You lie!
:P

NSFW
Moar NSFW

Atomic Spunk

2012-01-11 04:32:11 PM

They play football in Germany?

*reads article*

Oh, you mean soccer.

/ducks

scrumpox

2012-01-11 04:42:50 PM

Evil Mackerel: thompsonius: do they involve THIS German football team?

[2media.nowpublic.net image 382x476]I hope they are a tag team.

Is that an HTML tag team?

litespeed74

2012-01-11 05:06:14 PM

Ping pong balls involved here?

Inquizition

2012-01-11 05:28:44 PM

"Every player should have the feeling that his individuality is being considered."

What part of TEAM do they not understand?

Kanaric

2012-01-11 05:35:01 PM

german porn is not weird at all ive seen much more disgusting american and chinese porn

SpocksEars

2012-01-11 05:44:47 PM

Approves

Arachnophobe

2012-01-11 05:49:41 PM

They recommended that the couple go out to dinner at a sensibly priced restaurant, then have a night of efficient German sex.

LaraAmber

2012-01-11 05:56:53 PM

Is this for room assignments?

Let's see Hans and Frans both refuse to have sex before a game, so let's put them in room 214.
Bernd and Clause are both into threesome the night after a win, so they can have 215.
Daniel and Erwin pick up male escorts the after a loss, so they're in 216.
Felix and Gerald are both faithful to their wives, so 217 for them.

DrippinBalls

2012-01-11 06:15:21 PM

Pants full of macaroni!!

Do the Cleveland Steamer, or try the Donkey Punch
The old Egyptian Teabag could be the perfect lunch
She'll love the Gaylord Perry or the old Rusty Trombone
And the German Knuckle Cake will really make her moan

Pathetic! you BASTARD! My ex-wife loves you.Try the cleveland steamer, always hot & fresh!

bingethinker

2012-01-11 06:29:48 PM

Soccer players? Only if your idea of fun sex is falling down and crying whenever somebody touches you.

Gonz

2012-01-11 06:30:52 PM

thompsonius: do they involve THIS German football team?

Nice pic, I always like that one.

//Enjoy your vacation, too. The mods don't like bewbies to show up directly.

funk_soul_bubby

2012-01-11 06:47:44 PM

I_Can't_Believe_it's_not_Boutros: Yeah, I'm going to ask soccer players about scoring.

Soccer? I would have asked football players.

/I know, late again

mhd

2012-01-11 07:01:46 PM

As long as he isn't getting hairstyle tips from them...

12349876

2012-01-11 07:09:40 PM

Dirty ~~Sanchez~~ Hitler.

mikaloyd

2012-01-11 09:59:07 PM

I guess its better than asking the Penn State football team.

Scaevola

2012-01-11 11:40:53 PM

thompsonius: do they involve THIS German football team?

[2media.nowpublic.net image 382x476]

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