The misc tag is cracking me up for some reason

Hero tag?

kiwimoogle84: Since I work for the military, I'm getting a kick dick

FTFY

After a quick google of what this thing is....I'm not sure I would want to put this machine anywhere near my junk.

Patriotic men need to step up and take care of the wives of our brave centurions.

Jody don't need no batteries either.

They just need to make sure the marines' wives receive size extra-small models. Don't want them to get disappointed when their husbands return home from duty, do we?

HotIgneous Intruder: Patriotic men need to step up and take care of the wives of our brave centurions.

I'm UP to it.

Pic of the company's headquarters.

Omigawd (new window).
That's what they're talking about being made available to the troops...

Link sorta not safe for work, but maybe. With the sound off. No naked people are shown.
"The RealTouch is an electronic male masturbator."

Day-um.

NO, NO, NO. Top video is DEFINITELY NSFW.

Abort!

Protip: White guys, if there is a choice in color for the dildo, and one of those choices is black. Don't choose black. I know black is "in" right now but honestly, if you don't want black to be permanently "in" there, then just don't choose it, ok?

HotIgneous Intruder: NO, NO, NO. Top video is DEFINITELY NSFW.

Abort!

If people can't figure out that a video about a male masturbator is NSFW, then we're all lost.

I bought my wife a dildo, but she kept chipping her teeth.

Of course thousands of military guys would LOVE to come home to a wife with a cooch stretched like a wizard's sleeve.

BoredStiff: Hero tag?

that's all i came in here for

tyvm

Why would I need a thousand dildos?

Don't forget the crystals.

Offer not valid in Texas.

kiwimoogle84: DaveX: kiwimoogle84: Since I work for the military, I'm getting a kick dick

FTFY

No I'm not IN the military. I won't benefit.

/got a medical request for a penis pump for an active duty service member the other day, claiming medical necessity by the base
//I lol'd
///CSB
I'm telling ya baby, that's not mine.

fleshjack with a motor?

/not going there at work

She already has Jody, what does she need a dildo for?

FTFA: RealTouch is a slightly terrifying, synthetic orifice that lives in a plastic tube and connects to a computer. Based on data from an Internet connection, the unit warms up, lubes up, pulses and grips any item stuck into it. On the other end of a connection, a "performer"-who could be a paid "cam girl," or the aforementioned military wife-hand-operates a sensor-covered rod to run the motors in the RealTouch.

I LOL'D

RealTouch is currently available for $249.

Well that's one way to get fu*ked.

Teledildonics. I learned a new word today.

I know a thing or two about military bases and deployment. Trust me, there's plenty of farking going on on both sides. The men and women who are deployed fark like rabbits wherever they are at and the men and women left behind on base are farking like rabbits as well.

Whole lot of cheating going on with the military folks! (not that I'm judging)

Male masturbator. It's funny, that we can't just call a dildo, a dildo, even if it goes in your asshole as opposed to someone else's vagina.

kiwimoogle84: Since I work for the military, I'm getting a kick...

I bet you are. So, when did you get yours?

So how do you go about getting one of these? No link in the article or did I skim it too much on how to get one for free.

kiwimoogle84: MoronLessOff: kiwimoogle84: Since I work for the military, I'm getting a kick...

I bet you are. So, when did you get yours?

My kick? No I work FOR the military, I'm not IN the military. I'm just laughing about this. I wish, man. Rabbits are expensive.

/one retired general had the balls to submit for a tempurpedic bed as medically necessary med supply. I laughed about this for like two hours.

Perks, they got 'em.

Now I want to know what happens if the sender unit is inserted into the receiver unit. Runaway feedback?

There would seem to be a whole new field of 'special effects' that could open up. Record the signals, and play back at different rates. Splices/loops where its an infinite goes-in, or an infinite goes-out. Echo effects, etc.

Who is going to make the 'Photoshop' equivalent for this medium?

/not $250 interested, although I'd guess sender and receiver together would cost lots more.

kiwimoogle84: MoronLessOff: kiwimoogle84: Since I work for the military, I'm getting a kick...

I bet you are. So, when did you get yours?

My kick? No I work FOR the military, I'm not IN the military. I'm just laughing about this. I wish, man. Rabbits are expensive.

/one retired general had the balls to submit for a tempurpedic bed as medically necessary med supply. I laughed about this for like two hours.

HAH. Can't fault him for trying, I guess.

"Hey, also, do they make tempur-pedic toilet seats? My bum gets sore when I read on the can"

Have they given any thought to what might happen if one of these devices is captured by the Taliban?

That coward David Lopan: She already has Jody, what does she need a dildo for?

LOL

I guess they've never been to the enlisted club and seen all of the spouse-less wives who've already grown weary of their plastic friend.

kiwimoogle84: My kick? No I work FOR the military, I'm not IN the military. I'm just laughing about this. I wish, man. Rabbits are expensive.

Well, if you don't want to go the retail route, I understand they can be bred pretty easily at home.



/They said this would happen if we eliminated UCMJ Article 125! (new window)

Link (NSFW)

Funny. Porn companies should send workout chairs like this instead or remote control machines that the spouse can control overseas.

Call it project deep invader.

Andric: kiwimoogle84: MoronLessOff: kiwimoogle84: Since I work for the military, I'm getting a kick...

I bet you are. So, when did you get yours?

My kick? No I work FOR the military, I'm not IN the military. I'm just laughing about this. I wish, man. Rabbits are expensive.

/one retired general had the balls to submit for a tempurpedic bed as medically necessary med supply. I laughed about this for like two hours.

HAH. Can't fault him for trying, I guess.

"Hey, also, do they make tempur-pedic toilet seats? My bum gets sore when I read on the can"

No, for that you need one of those TOTOs. The ones with the heated air and water jets.