FARK.com: (6870879) What if Tim Tebow and Michele Bachmann had a baby? Seriously, what kind of half-assed website asks that question?

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		What if Tim Tebow and Michele Bachmann had a baby? Seriously, what kind of half-assed website asks that question? (nfl.com)		44
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1990 clicks; posted to Sports » on 10 Jan 2012 at 7:52 PM | Favorite | share:

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44 Comments (+0 »)

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msannomalley

2012-01-10 05:43:15 PM

It's not football, it's NFL.com.

BunkyBrewman

2012-01-10 06:18:42 PM

Fark.com?

Harv72b

2012-01-10 06:58:25 PM

7of7

2012-01-10 07:15:28 PM

Well....according to my handy Excel Punnett square maker
i.imgur.com

skinink

2012-01-10 07:57:31 PM

He'd throw a football like a woman? Or is that redundant?

lacrossestar83

2012-01-10 07:59:59 PM

crazy-eyed jesus

basemetal

2012-01-10 08:14:16 PM

Well hell, now I'm wondering too.

Hillbilly Jim

2012-01-10 08:14:55 PM

I think a right and proper shagging would do her a world of good. Doubtful she's getting a jolly good rogering from her hubby.

hallotavagyna

2012-01-10 08:17:23 PM

Am I close?

IntotheAbyss

2012-01-10 08:18:54 PM

Really, farking really?

hallotavagyna

2012-01-10 08:20:04 PM

A better question would have been "What if Ben Rothlesberger found out that Tim Tebow was a virgin and raped him on the sideline?"

//both are equally stupid

PluckYew

2012-01-10 08:21:55 PM

Downs syndrome all the way due to her advanced age. Not even Timmay's divine seed could prevent massive birth defects and extreme disability. Despite this the kid would be out dueling his mama in debates by age 3...3 months.

hallotavagyna

2012-01-10 08:27:44 PM

'Cmon Farkers! We can do much better than they can!

UNC_Samurai

2012-01-10 08:55:47 PM

hallotavagyna: [heykoolaid.com image 640x596]

'Cmon Farkers! We can do much better than they can!

But that is one thing we won't do. And the reason we won't do that thing is because... that thing would lower us.

Don't you agree?

Starhawk

2012-01-10 09:18:13 PM

Hillbilly Jim: I think a right and proper shagging would do her a world of good. Doubtful she's getting a jolly good rogering from her hubby.

I somehow have a doubt that an early-twenties virgin could provide said right and proper shagging.

Harv72b

2012-01-10 09:21:14 PM

Starhawk: I somehow have a doubt that an early-twenties virgin could provide said right and proper shagging.

The second or third time of the night, he probably could.

strapp3r

2012-01-10 09:21:44 PM

Representative of the unwashed masses

2012-01-10 09:23:55 PM

4 Tebow headlines in 1 day? I miss the days of Favre. Hell I would almost be willing to shell out the $5 a month just for the ability to downvote this stuff!

Hillbilly Jim

2012-01-10 09:25:30 PM

Representative of the unwashed masses: 4 Tebow headlines in 1 day? I miss the days of Favre. Hell I would almost be willing to shell out the $5 a month just for the ability to downvote this stuff!

Lol I know of at least one more that was submitted.

Rapmaster2000

2012-01-10 09:35:13 PM

Tim Tebow has less experience with women than the average Farker. Think about that.

mikaloyd

2012-01-10 09:39:38 PM

Rapmaster2000: Tim Tebow has less experience with women than the average Farker. Think about that.

True, but Tebow has less experience cyber sexing men who are pretending to be women on the internet. So he has that advantage

Crude

2012-01-10 09:59:32 PM

Holy shiatballs, NFL.com is almost getting as retarded as FARK.

Roger Goodell must go! (But mostly for booking shiatty SB Halftime acts) Madonna? In 2012? Are you farking kidding me?

Who the hell does he think watches football?

hallotavagyna

2012-01-10 10:14:38 PM

UNC_Samurai: hallotavagyna: [heykoolaid.com image 640x596]

'Cmon Farkers! We can do much better than they can!

But that is one thing we won't do. And the reason we won't do that thing is because... that thing would lower us.

Don't you agree?

Nope. Not at all. You clearly have FARK confused with some sort of website filled with elitists.

Fark is 4Chan Light.

/GO BRONCOS!
//GO TEBOW!
///Loves me a TEBOW thread!

four95

2012-01-10 10:32:08 PM

Ever notice that you never see Tim Tebow and Brendan Fraser in the same place at the same time?

static.nfl.com

Just sayin.

VictoryCabal

2012-01-10 10:45:03 PM

7of7: Well....according to my handy Excel Punnett square maker
i.imgur.com

Based on the lower right cell of your chart, if Tebow and Bachmann had a baby, it would be Heath Schuler.

Harv72b

2012-01-10 10:45:11 PM

Crude: (But mostly for booking shiatty SB Halftime acts) Madonna? In 2012? Are you farking kidding me?

Who the hell does he think watches football?

How ironic is it that the most controversial singer of the early '90s is now considered clean, safe family entertainment?

snailbarf

2012-01-10 10:56:19 PM

7of7: Well....according to my handy Excel Punnett square maker
[i.imgur.com image 640x66]

haaahahaha

Kiribub

2012-01-10 11:04:18 PM

One that will do anything it can to ride the Tebow wave to as many dollars as possible? This surprises you?

quartercomma

2012-01-10 11:06:33 PM

Well, Tebow pings Dan Savage's gaydar, so maybe Tim is a good fit for Michele after all!

Dan: "I've always been attracted to slightly swishy guys with a little bit of muscle. Tebow is his name? Hope he goes into porn when he's done with whatever he's doing now."

the_vegetarian_cannibal

2012-01-10 11:08:32 PM

U mad, bro?

Vodka Zombie

2012-01-10 11:31:48 PM

Representative of the unwashed masses: [cheezburger.com image 500x281]

Could have easily used Rogers for this as well.

And Rodgers is a pretty hard-core Christian himself. He's just not a simpering zealot like Timmay.

Huck And Molly Ziegler

2012-01-10 11:42:06 PM

I wouldn't care whether Tim Tebow and Michele Bachmann had a baby.

Now, if it were to be human, and live - THAT would concern me.

/"There's only one thing wrong with the Davis baby ...
//"It's alive!"

rynthetyn

2012-01-11 12:48:36 AM

quartercomma: Well, Tebow pings Dan Savage's gaydar, so maybe Tim is a good fit for Michele after all!

Dan: "I've always been attracted to slightly swishy guys with a little bit of muscle. Tebow is his name? Hope he goes into porn when he's done with whatever he's doing now."

I still can't figure out whether the reason Tebow keeps pinging everybody's gaydar is because he's gay or just because there are a lot of homeschooled straight boys who end up just a little bit on the effeminate side (I think because of spending so much formative time with primarily their mother's influence). Throw in the fact that he spent part of his formative years in another country, grew up to at least some extent around hipsters (I know one of Tebow's middle school Sunday school teachers, dude's a major hipster), and well, it's a recipe for throwing off everybody's gaydar.

In other words, I'd put the odds somewhere around 50/50 between "gay" and "homeschooler who had foreigners and hipsters rub off on him too much". Even the fact that nobody seems to be able to find any girls that he's dated could just as easily be chalked up to both "gay" and "homeschooler". Then again, as I can personally attest, "gay" and "homeschooler" aren't mutually exclusive categories.

skrame

2012-01-11 12:55:24 AM

Oh shiat. A link to a slideshow featuring a Tea Party politician AND Tim Tebow. It's like NFL.com said "Let's see how many hits we can squeeze from FARK.com".

Virulency

2012-01-11 12:56:40 AM

whos the keymaster....

I like waffles

2012-01-11 01:50:06 AM

I don't know what a Justin Bieber is, but if Tim Tebow had a baby with Michele Bachmann, the kid would look like one.

GreatGlavinsGhost

2012-01-11 02:46:51 AM

dang sure

2012-01-11 03:51:24 AM

dan savage is so queer he'd try to get chazz bono to fuk him

Tim Tebow is just one of those folks who is better than you.

Better, like your physics instructor or foreign language teacher.

He's better at his chosen profession, conducts his life with more humanity, and competes in a media arena that hates his superiority.

Don't worry,

every hybrid monkey pulling on his facemask will cripple him in time and he will die early because of this profession in which he excels

CagedMan

2012-01-11 05:57:06 AM

Better question: Where does the line start to cockpunch subby for posting a damn Tebow thread?

At least this Tebow crap will be over after this weekend.

Next weekend at the latest...

wooden_badger

2012-01-11 08:00:19 AM

Crude: Holy shiatballs, NFL.com is almost getting as retarded as FARK.

Roger Goodell must go! (But mostly for booking shiatty SB Halftime acts) Madonna? In 2012? Are you farking kidding me?

Who the hell does he think watches football?

You've got to remember that these are just simple farmers. These are people of the land. The common clay of the new West. You know... morons.

merkey88

2012-01-11 08:39:20 AM

Starhawk: Hillbilly Jim: I think a right and proper shagging would do her a world of good. Doubtful she's getting a jolly good rogering from her hubby.

I somehow have a doubt that an early-twenties virgin could provide said right and proper shagging.

Those 45 seconds would probably be the most penetration she's had in a decade.

SlothB77

2012-01-11 10:18:34 AM

IntotheAbyss: Really, farking really?

i have something more original and funnier than a 'Really?' joke:

C'Mon Man!
I didn't say it was original or funny. I just said it was more original and funnier than a 'Really?' joke.

Cajnik

2012-01-11 11:05:18 AM

I like NFL.com - one of the few sites with decent video that is not blocked outside of the US

mikaloyd

2012-01-11 11:25:04 AM

Is Tim Tebow on the gay agenda now?

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