If you can read this, either the style sheet didn't load or you have an older browser that doesn't support style sheets. Try clearing your browser cache and refreshing the page.

(Cleveland Plain Dealer) Weird We won't be able to get your car fixed today because we need to order the parts. And by order the parts I mean we'll have to steal pantyhose from a 16-year-old girl   (blog.cleveland.com) divider line 56
More: Weird, westlake, avon lake  
•       •       •

11421 clicks; posted to Main » on 10 Jan 2012 at 4:13 PM   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»   |    Get this fabulous T-Shirt and impress the methane out of your friends! shirt it!



56 Comments   (+0 »)
   
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest

First | « | 1 | 2 | » | Last | Show all
 
Grables'Daughter [TotalFark]
2012-01-10 04:03:47 PM
Okay... the article says that the man "asked" and also says he "demanded" the girls pantyhose.

She gave them to him, because he said he needed them to fix the exhaust system on his car.

FTA: Possible charges include theft, trespass and disorderly conduct, Turner said.

WTF?

Are we missing something, maybe?
 
ferretman [TotalFark]
2012-01-10 04:07:53 PM
Panty Hose is a temporary solution if a belt breaks. OP made it sound like the guy ripped the panty hose off the girl......
 
nopokerface
2012-01-10 04:16:11 PM
ferretman: Panty Hose is a temporary solution if a belt breaks.

FTA: The man said he wanted the pantyhose to fix his vehicle's exhaust system.

Dude's a perv.
 
unicron702
2012-01-10 04:16:27 PM
But what if I were to shake your hand in this wise?

*Begins ridiculous handshake and reveals special t-shirt*
 
Jake Havechek
2012-01-10 04:16:55 PM
I would keep my old fan belt in the trunk when I replaced it for emergency use since I never date women who wear pantyhose.
 
The sound of one hand clapping
2012-01-10 04:20:41 PM
Grables'Daughter: Okay... the article says that the man "asked" and also says he "demanded" the girls pantyhose.

She gave them to him, because he said he needed them to fix the exhaust system on his car.

FTA: Possible charges include theft, trespass and disorderly conduct, Turner said.

WTF?

Are we missing something, maybe?

Theft cause he stole a look at her whilst she was taking of the pantyhose.

Trespass cause his eyes were trespassing all over her body.

Disorderly conduct cause, well, cause everything he did.

/Got nuthin
 
DrippinBalls [TotalFark]
2012-01-10 04:21:07 PM
Sounds like ohio.............. sounds like Westlake. Sounds very pervy............. sounds like ohio.
 
brownbread
2012-01-10 04:21:09 PM
I've thought long and hard to avoid being enveloped by indecision when this conundrum strikes me. I'm going with:

b) Leave the car broken
 
Maud Dib
2012-01-10 04:22:17 PM
Wouldn't panty hose melt when exposed to a hot, throbbing exhaust pipe?
 
offmymeds
2012-01-10 04:23:08 PM
nopokerface: ferretman: Panty Hose is a temporary solution if a belt breaks.

FTA: The man said he wanted the pantyhose to fix his vehicle's exhaust system.

Dude's a perv.

That's a bit of a stretch.
 
nopokerface
2012-01-10 04:24:18 PM
Grables'Daughter: Are we missing something, maybe?

Theft by deception. He told her he was going to use them to her benefit, then fled

Trespassing must mean he was somewhere he wasn't wanted.

I don't get the DC unless that conduct is not included in the story
 
sirgrim [TotalFark]
2012-01-10 04:24:50 PM
Is it theft when you ask for something and are given it? Robbery might be a better fit if intimidation was used, but still. What a weirdo.
 
nopokerface
2012-01-10 04:25:18 PM
nopokerface: Theft by deception. He told her he was going to use them to her benefit, then fled

Nevermind. I read that wrong....
 
Wise_Guy
2012-01-10 04:25:51 PM
Wanted for questioning:

i.imgur.com
 
justanotherfarkinfarker
2012-01-10 04:27:06 PM
Hi I'm stuck with my broken down car and I need your vagina on my penis to fix it.

/Would that work?
 
Uptown Hipster Doofus [TotalFark]
2012-01-10 04:28:13 PM
There used to be (like 20 years ago) a car parts company in the Cleveland area that would deliver parts to gas station garages using hot girls in Hooters-esque clothing. I guess it wasn't cheap, but they passed the cost along to the customers. It was the highlight of their day.

/Forget the name.
//Wonder if they're still doing business.
///What size pantyhose do I need for my '74 Buick Electra 225?
 
nopokerface
2012-01-10 04:28:51 PM
justanotherfarkinfarker: Hi I'm stuck with my broken down car and I need your vagina on my penis to fix it.

/Would that work?

1 time out of 10
 
Kurmudgeon
2012-01-10 04:34:16 PM
Know how to tell when a girl wearing panty hose farts?

Her ankles swell....
 
toraque [TotalFark]
2012-01-10 04:34:54 PM
I suspect there will be an exhaustive search for this pervert, since so many people are getting their pantyhose in a bunch over it.
 
pedrop357
2012-01-10 04:39:53 PM
Maud Dib: Wouldn't panty hose melt when exposed to a hot, throbbing exhaust pipe?

Not necessarily. A trembling, pulsating exhaust? most definitely...
 
mod3072
2012-01-10 04:42:28 PM
The article leaves out one critical detail: Was she hot?
 
one of Ripley's Bad Guys
2012-01-10 04:45:08 PM
what 16 year old wears pantyhose nowadays?

Damn few women up here wear skirts/dresses, let alone hose...
 
Tergiversada
2012-01-10 04:46:06 PM
Jeff Foxworthy says, "If you've ever towed a car using panty hose and duct tape, you might be a redneck." I live in Alabama now. It wouldn't surprise me if I saw this one day!
 
rufus-t-firefly
2012-01-10 04:50:47 PM
offmymeds: nopokerface: ferretman: Panty Hose is a temporary solution if a belt breaks.

FTA: The man said he wanted the pantyhose to fix his vehicle's exhaust system.

Dude's a perv.

That's a bit of a stretch.

The Avon Lake girl took off her hose and gave them to the man, who ran off.

What, you think he left the oven on?
 
elev8meL8r
2012-01-10 04:51:04 PM
one of Ripley's Bad Guys: Damn few women up here wear skirts/dresses, let alone hose...

Hoes where I live pretty much all wear skirts. Not usually a dress though.
 
optional
2012-01-10 04:52:21 PM
one of Ripley's Bad Guys: what 16 year old wears pantyhose nowadays?

Damn few women up here wear skirts/dresses, let alone hose...

I can't speak for teenagers, but at college level there's always a few girls wearing them.

/not that I pay attention to such things
 
offmymeds
2012-01-10 04:55:17 PM
rufus-t-firefly: offmymeds: nopokerface: ferretman: Panty Hose is a temporary solution if a belt breaks.

FTA: The man said he wanted the pantyhose to fix his vehicle's exhaust system.

Dude's a perv.

That's a bit of a stretch.

The Avon Lake girl took off her hose and gave them to the man, who ran off.

What, you think he left the oven on?

...bit of a stretch...pantyhose...get it?

/oh well
 
weapon13
2012-01-10 05:02:34 PM
nopokerface: ferretman: Panty Hose is a temporary solution if a belt breaks.

FTA: The man said he wanted the pantyhose to fix his vehicle's exhaust system.

Dude's a perv.

I'm sure he managed to fix his 'exhaust system', if you know what I mean, and I think you do.

mod3072: The article leaves out one critical detail: Was she hot?

Came here to ask this.

16? Too old...
 
pottie
2012-01-10 05:02:53 PM
I think there are shenanigans afoot. I can't think of a single way in which one could use pantyhose as a temporary repair to an exhaust system, nor can I imagine why a 16 year old girl would surrender her pantyhose to a stranger. And while we're at it, why would he run away after he got the hose? This whole thing stinks like gym socks.
 
Chevello
2012-01-10 05:05:42 PM
Uptown Hipster Doofus: There used to be (like 20 years ago) a car parts company in the Cleveland area that would deliver parts to gas station garages using hot girls in Hooters-esque clothing. I guess it wasn't cheap, but they passed the cost along to the customers. It was the highlight of their day.

/Forget the name.
//Wonder if they're still doing business.
///What size pantyhose do I need for my '74 Buick Electra 225?

Not sure exactly, but you're gonna want something from the plus size rack most likely.
 
Mishno
2012-01-10 05:06:19 PM
Uptown Hipster Doofus: There used to be (like 20 years ago) a car parts company in the Cleveland area that would deliver parts to gas station garages using hot girls in Hooters-esque clothing. I guess it wasn't cheap, but they passed the cost along to the customers. It was the highlight of their day.

/Forget the name.
//Wonder if they're still doing business.
///What size pantyhose do I need for my '74 Buick Electra 225?

Deuce and a quarter? You're going to need the queen size, brah. Check outside a "Curves" gym for a date.
 
Profedius
2012-01-10 05:07:15 PM
Was it bad for me to think of all the things I could fix on a car using a pantyhose? What is the thrill for this guy smelling the crotch area?
 
Eatin' Queer Fetuses for Jesus
2012-01-10 05:09:35 PM
Westlake Ohio represent! I knew we had more than just the Marilyn Manson fan club! Go Demons!
 
Macular Degenerate
2012-01-10 05:15:35 PM
"What is this, a scuba suit?"

img834.imageshack.us

/too obscure?
 
Knara
2012-01-10 05:16:36 PM
Grables'Daughter: Are we missing something, maybe?

A competent reporter, most likely.

/a common problem
 
Inflatable Rhetoric
2012-01-10 05:21:09 PM
mod3072: The article leaves out one critical detail: Was she hot?

There's a map. We can go see. Assuming she's still there, of course.
 
Grables'Daughter [TotalFark]
2012-01-10 05:24:53 PM
mod3072: The article leaves out one critical detail: Was she hot?

Yes.

Yes she was.

This is her:

3.bp.blogspot.com
 
Grables'Daughter [TotalFark]
2012-01-10 05:25:32 PM
Of course, that pic was taken just BEFORE her pantyhose were stolen.
 
Profedius
2012-01-10 05:47:10 PM
Grables'Daughter: mod3072: The article leaves out one critical detail: Was she hot?

Yes.

Yes she was.

This is her:

[3.bp.blogspot.com image 640x480]

That looks as though it was taken in a hotel small conference room. That is one very nice looking woman too. I love the pose.
 
noreallythatsmyname
2012-01-10 05:49:53 PM
Grables'Daughter: Of course, that pic was taken just BEFORE her pantyhose were stolen.

She is not 16! Not bad at all, but not 16.
 
noreallythatsmyname
2012-01-10 05:52:14 PM
Profedius: Grables'Daughter: mod3072: The article leaves out one critical detail: Was she hot?

Yes.

Yes she was.

This is her:

[3.bp.blogspot.com image 640x480]

That looks as though it was taken in a hotel small conference room. That is one very nice looking woman too. I love the pose.

Wow. You saw a lot more in that pic than I did.
 
maniacalclown [TotalFark]
2012-01-10 06:03:26 PM
I'm going to need that lovely young lady sent to my room.
 
lack of warmth
2012-01-10 06:24:39 PM
Uptown Hipster Doofus: There used to be (like 20 years ago) a car parts company in the Cleveland area that would deliver parts to gas station garages using hot girls in Hooters-esque clothing. I guess it wasn't cheap, but they passed the cost along to the customers. It was the highlight of their day.

/Forget the name.
//Wonder if they're still doing business.
///What size pantyhose do I need for my '74 Buick Electra 225?

size 12 unless you have dual exhaust than two size 8
 
USAF Retired
2012-01-10 06:43:04 PM
i14.photobucket.com
 
Arcturus72 [TotalFark]
2012-01-10 06:51:33 PM
Grables'Daughter: mod3072: The article leaves out one critical detail: Was she hot?

Yes.

Yes she was.

This is her:

[3.bp.blogspot.com image 640x480]

If that's her, oh boy are a lot of Farkers fapping now...

And to all the ones saying there's no way she's 16, I beg to differ... My wife put the daughter through ballet classes a few years ago, and one of the times I had to go pick the kids up I saw one girl there who I (mistakenly) thought was in her 20's... My daughter told me that she was 13... Jaw on floor, etc...

The seat over here is taken already... yada yada...
 
Benjimin_Dover
2012-01-10 06:54:34 PM
Uptown Hipster Doofus: There used to be (like 20 years ago) a car parts company in the Cleveland area that would deliver parts to gas station garages using hot girls in Hooters-esque clothing. I guess it wasn't cheap, but they passed the cost along to the customers. It was the highlight of their day.

/Forget the name.
//Wonder if they're still doing business.
///What size pantyhose do I need for my '74 Buick Electra 225?

That was probably Cooter's.

www.searchmarketinggurus.com
 
special20 [TotalFark]
2012-01-10 06:59:17 PM
Nah, I bet this little girl made the whole story up. She probably got them ripped up by her horny boyfriend and threw them away - left having to explain to her parents why she came home with naked legs.

/truer story
 
Raptor
2012-01-10 07:15:08 PM
Man, first they try to steal my Taco Bell's artnow they're stealing the local's panty hose.

Dark times....
 
Bit'O'Gristle
2012-01-10 08:12:15 PM
Hmmm..methinks that they were more for sniffing and fapping due to the fact that nylon would melt, and he was obviously a panty and stocking fetishist. Wtf is wrong with people. I cry shenanigans, some dude comes up and asks you for your stockings, and you just GIVE them to him? In PUBLIC? She could have just walked away and gotten help while the perv ran off to his mom's basement.
 
sseye
2012-01-10 10:38:35 PM
special20: Nah, I bet this little girl made the whole story up. She probably got them ripped up by her horny boyfriend and threw them away - left having to explain to her parents why she came home with naked legs.

/truer story

I'm gonna go with this. He turned his back while she took them off? Sense make this does not.
 
Displayed 50 of 56 comments

First | « | 1 | 2 | » | Last | Show all

View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest

Redisplay/refresh comments

This thread is closed to new comments.

Continue Farking
Submit a Link »
From the Fark Shop:
More from the Fark Shop »