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(Talking Points Memo) Asinine In case anyone cares, Newt Gingrich gets the all-important "former first dude of Alaska" endorsement   (livewire.talkingpointsmemo.com) divider line 42
More: Asinine, Newt Gingrich, Alaska, Palin, Sarah Palin  
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568 clicks; posted to Politics » on 09 Jan 2012 at 4:48 PM   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»   |    Get this fabulous T-Shirt and impress the methane out of your friends! shirt it!



42 Comments   (+0 »)
   
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest
 
Mr. Coffee Nerves [TotalFark]
2012-01-09 02:08:22 PM
...in exchange for a copy of Newt's "How to ditch your wife when she starts looking all raggedy/cancery and still be an icon of 'Moral Values' to the retardeds."
 
I_Am_Weasel [TotalFark]
2012-01-09 02:18:27 PM
Well now he's picked up the coveted Alaska Independence Party endorsement. There is nothing but positive in that.

/not quite, but close.
 
make me some tea [TotalFark]
2012-01-09 02:22:16 PM
Meh.
 
I Said [TotalFark]
2012-01-09 02:33:39 PM
Jesus. If Newt has Todd, then he likely has Sarah too. Sarah means you get Victoria Jackson and Ted Nugent. Ted Nugent gives you Sean Hannity.

With one brilliant master-stroke, the former speaker, and known political heavyweight who pulls strings we didn't even know were there, has solidified the endorsement of "Derp Voltron: Defender of the Jesusland"
 
coco ebert [TotalFark]
2012-01-09 02:51:43 PM
It's not an endorsement if you're a nobody.
 
SilentStrider [TotalFark]
2012-01-09 02:53:42 PM
Nope. Nobody cares.
 
MaudlinMutantMollusk [TotalFark]
2012-01-09 03:35:51 PM
Following his wife's lead, the endorsement will be dropped half way through the primaries
 
Lost Thought 00
2012-01-09 04:51:28 PM
Gingrich is going to ride the Cain Train to victory in South Carolina, Florida, and ultimately a brutal nomination fight at the convention, after which party elders settle on a compromise candidate - Sarah Palin.
 
CaesarSneezy
2012-01-09 04:53:03 PM
Todd, that lactonic motherfarker.
 
sammyk [TotalFark]
2012-01-09 04:53:32 PM
FAT:But he said he respects Gingrich for what he went through in the 1990s and compared that scrutiny in public life to what Sarah Palin went through during her run for the vice presidency.

I remember the slamander being the ring leader of a farked up political witch hunt but that's just one way of looking at it Todd. Now go fall through the ice on your snow machine. Seriously do it.
 
sammyk [TotalFark]
2012-01-09 04:54:17 PM
sammyk: FAT:But he said he respects Gingrich for what he went through in the 1990s and compared that scrutiny in public life to what Sarah Palin went through during her run for the vice presidency.

I remember the slamander being the ring leader of a farked up political witch hunt but that's just one way of looking at it Todd. Now go fall through the ice on your snow machine. Seriously do it.

/derp
/meant FTA
 
Samuel Beale's Ghost
2012-01-09 04:59:38 PM
sammyk: sammyk: FAT:But he said he respects Gingrich for what he went through in the 1990s and compared that scrutiny in public life to what Sarah Palin went through during her run for the vice presidency.

I remember the slamander being the ring leader of a farked up political witch hunt but that's just one way of looking at it Todd. Now go fall through the ice on your snow machine. Seriously do it.

/derp
/meant FTA

Yes, but did you mean "slamander " or "salamander "?
 
The $25000 Dodecahedron
2012-01-09 05:05:19 PM
sammyk: sammyk: FAT:But he said he respects Gingrich for what he went through in the 1990s and compared that scrutiny in public life to what Sarah Palin went through during her run for the vice presidency.

I remember the slamander being the ring leader of a farked up political witch hunt but that's just one way of looking at it Todd. Now go fall through the ice on your snow machine. Seriously do it.

/derp
/meant FTA

Sure, but "FAT" is much funnier.
 
Arkanaut
2012-01-09 05:06:23 PM
I'm going to withhold judgment until we hear from Levi Johnston.
 
SomeoneDumb
2012-01-09 05:14:49 PM
If everyone in Alaska thinks the way Todd does, we'll have a unanimous primary result. I guess that would be something.
 
Leo Bloom's Freakout
2012-01-09 05:17:27 PM
I Said: Jesus. If Newt has Todd, then he likely has Sarah too. Sarah means you get Victoria Jackson and Ted Nugent. Ted Nugent gives you Sean Hannity.

With one brilliant master-stroke, the former speaker, and known political heavyweight who pulls strings we didn't even know were there, has solidified the endorsement of "Derp Voltron: Defender of the Jesusland"

"If we hit that bullseye, the rest of the dominoes should fall like a house of cards. Checkmate." - Unnamed GOP 2012 Strategist
 
Poison Appleseeds
2012-01-09 05:19:49 PM
Because if there's one GOP candidate whose not a "Washington Insider" it's Newt Gingrich.

/sarcasm
 
Guidette Frankentits
2012-01-09 05:28:57 PM
If Sarah's power animal is sea turtles and power food is tacos, what is Todd's?
 
Maud Dib
2012-01-09 05:29:41 PM
Samuel Beale's Ghost: sammyk: sammyk: FAT:But he said he respects Gingrich for what he went through in the 1990s and compared that scrutiny in public life to what Sarah Palin went through during her run for the vice presidency.

I remember the slamander being the ring leader of a farked up political witch hunt but that's just one way of looking at it Todd. Now go fall through the ice on your snow machine. Seriously do it.

/derp
/meant FTA

Yes, but did you mean "slamander " or "salamander "?

He meant Salander.

2.bp.blogspot.com
 
Gotfire
2012-01-09 05:31:06 PM
My neighbor's teabagging dog has just announced his endorsement of old frothful. Where is his coverage in the national media?
 
theknuckler_33
2012-01-09 05:34:17 PM
I Said: Jesus. If Newt has Todd, then he likely has Sarah too. Sarah means you get Victoria Jackson and Ted Nugent. Ted Nugent gives you Sean Hannity.

And then you get Kevin Bacon?
 
Whatthefark
2012-01-09 05:35:21 PM
...and compared that scrutiny in public life to what Sarah Palin went through during her run for the vice presidency.

The victim card is the only one in her deck.
 
Leo Bloom's Freakout
2012-01-09 05:35:56 PM
Guidette Frankentits: If Sarah's power animal is sea turtles and power food is tacos, what is Todd's?

Three wolves and apparently, Slim Jims (new window). It actually does seem appropriate.
 
theknuckler_33
2012-01-09 05:35:56 PM
make me some tea: Meh.

That was my first reaction, but I Said has a good point that this might mean that he's got Sarah. Not really sure what that means in terms of moving the electorate... I suspect Sarah may have lost some of her luster for many of her supporters when she refused to run on her own.
 
Gotfire
2012-01-09 05:38:02 PM
HE'S NOT GOING TO BANG YOU, TODD
 
theknuckler_33
2012-01-09 05:38:44 PM
Gotfire: My neighbor's teabagging dog has just announced his endorsement of old frothful. Where is his coverage in the national media?

I'm guessing it's not a pitbull.
 
BilltheThrill
2012-01-09 06:11:03 PM
I imagine his endorsement was preceeded by chugging a michelob and doing about 15 push ups shirtless, then followed by a "fark Yeah" and a round of high fives.
 
Bill_Wick's_Friend
2012-01-09 06:28:09 PM
229 clicks; posted to Politics » on 09 Jan 2012 at 4:48 PM

Nope. Doesn't sound like too many people care.
 
IXI Jim IXI [TotalFark]
2012-01-09 06:34:55 PM
I'll wait to see who Bristol's tits endorse. Only thing worth paying attention to in that family...

We knew he wouldn't get cancer's endorsement, but now he's landed worse
 
varmitydog
2012-01-09 06:38:26 PM
Husband of self serving batshiat crazy politician endorses a self serving batshiat crazy politician. Leastwise the man is consistant.
 
Snarcoleptic_Hoosier [TotalFark]
2012-01-09 07:30:21 PM
I Said: Jesus. If Newt has Todd, then he likely has Sarah too. Sarah means you get Victoria Jackson and Ted Nugent. Ted Nugent gives you Sean Hannity.

With one brilliant master-stroke, the former speaker, and known political heavyweight who pulls strings we didn't even know were there, has solidified the endorsement of "Derp Voltron: Defender of the Jesusland"

...And now your posts will be favorited
 
MontanaDave
2012-01-09 08:06:08 PM
I think I just heard the sound of not a single fark being given.
 
quatchi
2012-01-09 08:35:21 PM
MontanaDave: I think I just heard the sound of not a single fark being given.

What is the sound of one fark not being given?

/Fark koans, ask for them by name, kids.
 
thomps [TotalFark]
2012-01-09 08:38:20 PM
quatchi: MontanaDave: I think I just heard the sound of not a single fark being given.

What is the sound of one fark not being given?

/Fark koans, ask for them by name, kids.

i saw a crackhead on a train once sit down directly in front of the car's door to eat out of his bag of mcdonalds. i submit that the sound of his unrelenting, metronomic farts is probably the sound of not one f*ck being given.
 
quatchi
2012-01-09 08:42:02 PM
fta:...he respects Gingrich for what he went through in the 1990s...

Two wives, three mistress, four personal aides, a few of his friend's wives and a shiat ton of interns?

That's not respect, he's just jealous.

Maybe the respect is for doing all that while publicly chastising Clinton for getting Lewinskied?

Hard to say, these snow machiners, they're not like you and I.
 
YELLOL
2012-01-10 03:55:15 AM
I love his wife but he is dumber than their retard baby.
 
quatchi
2012-01-10 06:13:10 AM
IXI Jim IXI: I'll wait to see who Bristol's tits endorse. Only thing worth paying attention to in that family...

We knew he wouldn't get cancer's endorsement, but now he's landed worse

Anyone else find it funny that "Bristols" is an English slang term fer teh boobies?

/Just me again? Dang.
 
Crunch61
2012-01-10 08:46:26 AM
Damn you, McCain!
 
carrion_luggage [TotalFark]
2012-01-10 09:00:27 AM
Good on that fat moneygrubbing goblin for nailing down the all-important Alaskan First Retard endorsement. I'm sure Noot celebrated by getting his knob slobbered by some lady not his shehag wife.
 
Philip Francis Queeg
2012-01-10 09:07:24 AM
YELLOL: I love his wife but he is dumber than their retard baby.

In the name of God, WHY?
 
Hobodeluxe
2012-01-10 10:27:54 AM
Todd is just her mouthpiece. Sarah can't officially endorse a candidate. It would restrict the way she can use her PAC money.
Like using it for vacations for the family.

I wonder what Newt promised her for the endorsement?
 
SurfaceTension [TotalFark]
2012-01-10 10:38:18 AM
theknuckler_33: I'm guessing it's not a pitbull.

...with lipstick
 
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