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(ESPN)   Tim Tebow follows in the footsteps of The Father, The Son and The Holy Sh*t   (scores.espn.go.com) divider line 812
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25170 clicks; posted to Sports » on 08 Jan 2012 at 8:22 PM (2 years ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2012-01-08 10:22:46 PM

ThatFoolMatt: 9beers: Tebow 316 passing yards

John 3:16

Hmmmmmmmmmmmmmm

averaging 31.6 yards per completion!


You must be a math major or something. Or watching ESPN and stealing their terrible jokes.
 
2012-01-08 10:22:54 PM

becksellent: /not gonna argue with you on that one though, lol ;)


hehe :D

TV's Vinnie: The poor should be tortured.


In defense of Tebow, his own father does missionary work helping the poor, so Tebow is not among those who think the poor should be left to suffer as it's their own fault they are poor.
 
2012-01-08 10:22:57 PM

AnEvilGuest: muck4doo: You got my funny vote.

you haven't seen any of the other 50 times that jokes been posted recently?

I guess it served a purpose after all


I need to spend more time on the internets.
 
2012-01-08 10:23:42 PM

TV's Vinnie: It's not so much that Tebow gives thanks to God for a touchdown that is bad,. It's the drooling hillbillies who see this spectacle and take it as a sign from God himself that America should be turned into one big theocratic nightmare.

Abortion should be banned.

The poor should be tortured.

Gays should be shot on sight.

All books except the Republican Jesus Bible should be burned.

All science and even the mere questioning of biblical authority is outlawed under pain of death.

THAT is what makes this so offensive and frightening.


That sounds about as stupid as "war on Christmas"

You are what you hate
 
2012-01-08 10:24:01 PM

TV's Vinnie: It's not so much that Tebow gives thanks to God for a touchdown that is bad,. It's the drooling hillbillies who see this spectacle and take it as a sign from God himself that America should be turned into one big theocratic nightmare.


Those idiots will find their signs in anything. That shouldn't change your ability to enjoy or like something.
 
2012-01-08 10:24:11 PM

Nabb1: PanicMan: italie: The Smails Kid: On a positive note, this gives Ben a few more weeks of rapin' time.

That's why he wore his raping hat.

I'm a Steeler's fan, and this comment is fantastic. That hat is comically creepy.

The hat is a poor choice. I think a fedora can be a great fashion statement, but the style Ben has chosen actually makes his big head look even bigger, and that's not good. And the one he chose didn't match the rather nice suit and tie he had on. There are probably a few guys on his team that agree, and yet, they let him walk out of the locker room and go on camera like that without warning him that he looked like a big-headed goober makes you wonder what they think of him in the locker room to let him walk out looking like that.


I don't wear fedoras for the opposite reason, they make my head look tiny. If you can pull it off, great. If not, just walk away.
 
2012-01-08 10:24:32 PM

becksellent: SilentStrider: WhyteRaven74: /there aren't any Steelers fans left in here are there? ;)

i doubt it.

Well, I've been checking in every once in a while, mostly because I'm a masochist bored. ;)


fair enough. as a phillies/eagles fan, I've been there. :)
 
2012-01-08 10:25:49 PM
As a Texans fan, I would fully support a Troll Bowl, the Tebows vs the Texans, led by THE JAKE
 
2012-01-08 10:26:07 PM

Nabb1: 66dude: This! I mean, Tebow apparently forgot about a small passage in the Bible requiring Christians to go to their rooms, shut the door, and pray in silence. Hypocrite.

You mean the passage where Jesus explains that God knows the difference between acts of true faith and shows of false piety, and then proceeds to teach the crowd the Lord's Prayer?


The fark religion experts believe it was a commandment.

/Thou shalt pray in the closet
 
2012-01-08 10:26:08 PM
I'm not saying there's a bunch of butthurt, but there's a bunch of butthurt.

insert historychannelguy.jpg
 
2012-01-08 10:26:49 PM

SilentStrider: becksellent: SilentStrider: WhyteRaven74: /there aren't any Steelers fans left in here are there? ;)

i doubt it.

Well, I've been checking in every once in a while, mostly because I'm a masochist bored. ;)

fair enough. as a phillies/eagles fan, I've been there. :)


37 days to pitchers and catchers reporting. Can't wait to see Thome again!
 
2012-01-08 10:27:15 PM

ATRDCI: As a Texans fan, I would fully support a Troll Bowl, the Tebows vs the Texans, led by THE JAKE


I'm pretty sure that no one in the Sports tab would survive the ensuing lolocaust that game would bring.
 
2012-01-08 10:28:33 PM

Jake Leg: Seth'n'Spectrum: Can someone explain the joke? I take it Tebow is an uber-religious quarterback who plays for the Broncos, what am I missing here?

For some reason, Tebow's faith has been politicized by drudge and other conservative news outlets. Like they own him or something. Newsflash - half the guys in the NFL take a knee after a great play. I am not a huge Tebow fan, but it is nice to see two QBs in the same game who are willing to run and take a hit.


Drudge is in favor of Tebow's faith? If so, that's a hoot. A semi-closet homosexual promoting Christian viewpoints? Come on already, Drudge... come out of the closet already.

/NTTAWWT

//I'm guessing Drudge has a lot of $3 bills in his wallet.
 
2012-01-08 10:28:46 PM

TV's Vinnie: It's not so much that Tebow gives thanks to God for a touchdown that is bad,. It's the drooling hillbillies who see this spectacle and take it as a sign from God himself that America should be turned into one big theocratic nightmare.

Abortion should be banned.

The poor should be tortured.

Gays should be shot on sight.

All books except the Republican Jesus Bible should be burned.

All science and even the mere questioning of biblical authority is outlawed under pain of death.

THAT is what makes this so offensive and frightening.


Actually, you know what it is, troll? It's finally watching a football player that never takes credit for what he does, always thanks his teammates, and tells the opponent good job. He's fun to watch. So what if he kneels and Tebows and all that crap, WHO REALLY CARES. Idiots. God forbid (see what I did there) there be a polarizing player that doesn't spend the offseason shooting his leg in a nightclub, beating his girlfriend, or buying his 17th house and going bankrupt.

I'm not religious, but I'm a huge football fan. And I find Tebow fun to watch, because his entire TEAM rallies behind him like a team should. Compare how the Broncos are playing compared to how the Jets are imploding (both on the field and in the press).

Enjoy your loss, Steelers fan. I'm sorry that you find someone like this so awful and horrible. In the end, those of us who enjoy the game are having a hell of a good time watching these fun games. It's just that most of us have the intellect and/or the foresight to just push the religious stuff aside and enjoy it for what it is. Someone out there having fun, ffs. Get a life. Or feed off your emotions. Whatever, I'll be sitting back with my wings and chips/dip and beer next weekend. I'll be sure to have my wife honk my horn in solidarity at you standing on an overpass protesting that we're all enjoying watching him be a football player.
 
2012-01-08 10:28:46 PM

TV's Vinnie: It's not so much that Tebow gives thanks to God for a touchdown that is bad,. It's the drooling hillbillies who see this spectacle and take it as a sign from God himself that America should be turned into one big theocratic nightmare.

Abortion should be banned.

The poor should be tortured.

Gays should be shot on sight.

All books except the Republican Jesus Bible should be burned.

All science and even the mere questioning of biblical authority is outlawed under pain of death.

THAT is what makes this so offensive and frightening.


Those people will think that anyway. It's just a football game. Relax and just enjoy it. The outcome of the game isn't going to affect your life. Unless you have money on it, of course.
 
2012-01-08 10:34:59 PM

Nabb1: Those people will think that anyway. It's just a football game. Relax and just enjoy it. The outcome of the game isn't going to affect your life. Unless you have money on it, of course.


Yeah, well wait until he endorses a frothing born-again political candidate like Santorum for example. You just KNOW there will be a "Tebow Bounce" out of something like that.
 
2012-01-08 10:36:52 PM

TV's Vinnie: Nabb1: Those people will think that anyway. It's just a football game. Relax and just enjoy it. The outcome of the game isn't going to affect your life. Unless you have money on it, of course.

Yeah, well wait until he endorses a frothing born-again political candidate like Santorum for example. You just KNOW there will be a "Tebow Bounce" out of something like that.


I don't see him doing that, personally. Seems too attention-seeking for his style.
 
2012-01-08 10:37:30 PM

darch: I'm sorry- as impressive as that win was, the truth is that if the media wasn't making such a big deal of tebow's religious leanings, he'd just be another decent quarterback who's played a few good games.


Everybody I have heard on the radio has compared him to Sucky and his younger brother, Awful.
 
2012-01-08 10:38:25 PM
If the Bucs win the Superbowl next year I will be a believer. ;) lol
 
2012-01-08 10:40:57 PM

Ender's: darch: I'm sorry- as impressive as that win was, the truth is that if the media wasn't making such a big deal of tebow's religious leanings, he'd just be another decent quarterback who's played a few good games.

Everybody I have heard on the radio has compared him to Sucky and his younger brother, Awful.


He's not decent, though. The guy has something about him that allows him to more or less stumble into ridiculously lucky situations time after time.

Usually I'd count a team like his out of Super Bowl contention... but with Tebow at the helm, anything is possible. It's like he can change the laws of probability or something.
 
2012-01-08 10:41:09 PM

eggrolls: [stevelundeberg.mvourtown.com image 400x400]

Come at me, Tebow.


This!
 
2012-01-08 10:41:59 PM
i40.tinypic.com
 
2012-01-08 10:45:17 PM

walkerhound: [i1099.photobucket.com image 498x702]


Gah! The middle pic looks like a civil war era picture of a corpse.
 
2012-01-08 10:48:20 PM
IMO Tebow's continued success is proof of the non-existence of the Christian God.

Because if said deity was real, he would no doubt be so revolted by this person having the gall to pray for something so trivial when there are so many actual, dire, problems in the world, and even worse, assuming that those petty prayers are being answered over the mothers of missing children, etc, that he would devote at least a tiny bit of his attention towards handing this jackass one calamity after another for the rest of his life.
 
2012-01-08 10:49:38 PM

libranoelrose: [i40.tinypic.com image 620x529]


That's freaky, given all the other numbers.

glassbottomboatcaptain: IMO Tebow's continued success is proof of the non-existence of the Christian God.

Because if said deity was real, he would no doubt be so revolted by this person having the gall to pray for something so trivial when there are so many actual, dire, problems in the world, and even worse, assuming that those petty prayers are being answered over the mothers of missing children, etc, that he would devote at least a tiny bit of his attention towards handing this jackass one calamity after another for the rest of his life.


If God is some omnipotent, omniscience superbeing, odds are he can answer as many prayers as he wants.

God just happens to be a bit of a dick.

/Assuming he even exists
 
2012-01-08 10:49:45 PM

Fade2black: Actually, you know what it is, troll? It's finally watching a football player that never takes credit for what he does, always thanks his teammates, and tells the opponent good job. He's fun to watch. So what if he kneels and Tebows and all that crap, WHO REALLY CARES. Idiots. God forbid (see what I did there) there be a polarizing player that doesn't spend the offseason shooting his leg in a nightclub, beating his girlfriend, or buying his 17th house and going bankrupt.

I'm not religious, but I'm a huge football fan. And I find Tebow fun to watch, because his entire TEAM rallies behind him like a team should. Compare how the Broncos are playing compared to how the Jets are imploding (both on the field and in the press).

Enjoy your loss, Steelers fan. I'm sorry that you find someone like this so awful and horrible. In the end, those of us who enjoy the game are having a hell of a good time watching these fun games. It's just that most of us have the intellect and/or the foresight to just push the religious stuff aside and enjoy it for what it is. Someone out there having fun, ffs. Get a life. Or feed off your emotions. Whatever, I'll be sitting back with my wings and chips/dip and beer next weekend. I'll be sure to have my wife honk my horn in solidarity at you standing on an overpass protesting that we're all enjoying watching him be a football player.




I like Tebow's success because he inspires so many morally bankrupt people to identify themselves by contriving preposterous reasons to criticize him. I'm certainly not under the impression that Tebow's perfect, but we really don't know anything bad about him.
 
2012-01-08 10:49:48 PM

Marine1: Usually I'd count a team like his out of Super Bowl contention... but with Tebow at the helm, anything is possible. It's like he can change the laws of probability or something.


www.watcherswatch.com
 
2012-01-08 10:51:16 PM

ozzie_stu: I love his god and his god's priorities so much.

[static6.businessinsider.com image 400x300]

[www.pulitzer.org image 250x200]


What's your point? Better yet, what have you done to help the homeless and starving this past year? Yeah, that's what I thought. Tebow on the other hand . . .
 
2012-01-08 10:51:25 PM

Pratty: WhyteRaven74: SilentStrider: lighter build

Vick is listed at 6 feet and 215 lbs, Roethlisberger is listed as 6'5" 245 lbs. So while he is shorter and lighter, Vick would have the heavier build.

And Tebow is 6' 3", 236 LBs.

/James Harrison is 6' 0", 242 LBs
//Ray Lewis is 6' 1", 250
///Von Miller is 6' 3", 245


vick might just not be 215 lbs. roethlisberger might be 260.
 
2012-01-08 10:55:03 PM

ozzie_stu: I love his god and his god's priorities so much.

[static6.businessinsider.com image 400x300]ather
[www.pulitzer.org image 250x200]


Why don't you STFU. It's a football game. Are there not more appropriate places to insert your blatent misunderstanding of human nature? Post your "fly/fire" on the little black kids pic in the politic branch of fark,,, you farking loser. You're either a farking pathetic troll or a disfranchised Stiller fan. Ether way,,, STFU.

/GO PATS!!!!!
 
2012-01-08 10:56:50 PM
Somebody won a football game.

Ask me if I give a shirt.

Personally I like the announcer/commentator who said: "Maybe if Tebow would kill some dogs, rape underage girls, snort coke and get busted, and then run someone over in his car while dead drunk, he would get some respect too---"

Or you might have a fight with your wife and wreck your Escalade.

\\\ Worked for Tiger Woods.
 
2012-01-08 10:57:50 PM
Worthlessberger or Shebo.

It was coin flip on who would win.
 
2012-01-08 10:59:09 PM

AdmirableSnackbar: 37 days to pitchers and catchers reporting. Can't wait to see Thome again!


his return makes me nervous. He's not exactly young, and he hasn't played in the field in several years.
 
2012-01-08 10:59:11 PM
Grats ponies and Tebow. I just wish my good friend who was a big time Broncos fan was alive to see this. She passed this year before Tebow got the starting job. She would have loved it.
 
2012-01-08 10:59:20 PM

ununcle: sammyk: IBreakdance2NIN: darch: I'm sorry- as impressive as that win was, the truth is that if the media wasn't making such a big deal of tebow's religious leanings, he'd just be another decent quarterback who's played a few good gaTebow's QB rating was 125.mes.

Not so much "decent" as "gimmicky as hell".

Tebow's QB rating was 125.6 today. Suck it hater muwhahahahaha

Yeah on like 6 passes? You have to weigh consistancy. This is why QB's with less then so many touches don't count in QB ratings.


He went 10/21 so yea his completion percentage could be a lot better. But he also got 316 yards out of it. That comes out to 31.6 yards/completion breaking every playoff record for that stat(source is NFL network, would link it if I could). Your delusional if you didn't see the quality of those throws.
 
2012-01-08 11:00:48 PM

olddinosaur: Somebody won a football game.

Ask me if I give a shirt.


Why would you give a shirt? Are you a male stripper on your off time?

/Why are you in the thread if you don't give a shiat?
 
2012-01-08 11:01:55 PM

Pratty: That's freaky, given all the other numbers.


That's what I thought. This was truly a divine miracle.
 
2012-01-08 11:02:35 PM
One last thought. Even if you don't like Tim Tebow, remember that right now Colin Cowherd is sitting at home, shiatting himself in rage. There's a good chance that he may start crying during his radio show tomorrow morning.

That has to be worth something.
 
2012-01-08 11:02:39 PM
BHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHA

Suck it!
 
2012-01-08 11:03:01 PM

sammyk: He went 10/21 so yea his completion percentage could be a lot better. But he also got 316 yards out of it. That comes out to 31.6 yards/completion breaking every playoff record for that stat(source is NFL network, would link it if I could). Your delusional if you didn't see the quality of those throws.


Don't matter. Brady's shredding them for like 450-500. Pat's are gonna kill them.
 
2012-01-08 11:04:26 PM

ununcle: sammyk: He went 10/21 so yea his completion percentage could be a lot better. But he also got 316 yards out of it. That comes out to 31.6 yards/completion breaking every playoff record for that stat(source is NFL network, would link it if I could). Your delusional if you didn't see the quality of those throws.

Don't matter. Brady's shredding them for like 450-500. Pat's are gonna kill them.


You mean like how he did earlier in the year?

Wait, oops.

/Broncos have to be the underdog
//But with the Pats D, saying they're going to "kill" anyone is a risky move
 
2012-01-08 11:05:11 PM

The Southern Dandy: [1.bp.blogspot.com image 640x465]


Guess the starving kid should've tried believing in Him.
 
2012-01-08 11:08:05 PM
Passive Aggressive Larry:


how sh*t in your mother*cking Cheerydon'ts, you sniveling poo-covered asshair?
 
2012-01-08 11:08:29 PM

Pratty: ununcle: sammyk: He went 10/21 so yea his completion percentage could be a lot better. But he also got 316 yards out of it. That comes out to 31.6 yards/completion breaking every playoff record for that stat(source is NFL network, would link it if I could). Your delusional if you didn't see the quality of those throws.

Don't matter. Brady's shredding them for like 450-500. Pat's are gonna kill them.

You mean like how he did earlier in the year?

Wait, oops.


Why? They've done it enough.

/Broncos have to be the underdog
//But with the Pats D, saying they're going to "kill" anyone is a risky move

 
2012-01-08 11:08:47 PM

Pratty: If God is some omnipotent, omniscience superbeing, odds are he can answer as many prayers as he wants.

God just happens to be a bit of a dick


Oh I get that, I'm just saying, if he does exist, American Christians are pretty much the last people on earth he's going to reward.

Look at it this way. Remember that article that was out on Boxing Day, showing all the tweets of ungrateful children, teens and (sigh) adults biatching and moaning because their iPhone wasn't the right color, with quotes like 'God I hate my parents, I can't believe they did this to me'. Remember how utterly infuriating it was to witness people so involved in their 'me, me, me' world, especially at Christmas, the season of love, family, and giving? Imagine that, but instead of you, it's God, and instead of a blogpost, it's prayers, and instead of self absorbed its....well...that one stays the same.

If that doesn't work for you, imagine you were put in charge of a charity fund, and tasked to distribute a million dollars among people who need and deserve it. So you're meeting all these poor, malnourished people, listening to their stories, trying your best to help them feed their families, and then next in line is a big fat kid holding an imported PSP Vita, and he tells you he needs money for a new Xbox 360 because all his friends have the new black ones with built in wifi, and he's stuck with the old white model, and his mom won't buy it for him because she just bought him a new PS3.

Are you really going to give that fat little prick money to by an indulgence, knowing he's already obviously well off, well fed, and even worse, feels entitled to it for no particular reason.

Probably not.
 
2012-01-08 11:09:39 PM

ununcle: ozzie_stu: I love his god and his god's priorities so much.

[static6.businessinsider.com image 400x300]ather
[www.pulitzer.org image 250x200]

Why don't you STFU. It's a football game. Are there not more appropriate places to insert your blatent misunderstanding of human nature? Post your "fly/fire" on the little black kids pic in the politic branch of fark,,, you farking loser. You're either a farking pathetic troll or a disfranchised Stiller fan. Ether way,,, STFU.

/GO PATS!!!!!


Amazing how posting the "free cat" pic is a bannable offense here, but that one is a-ok.
 
2012-01-08 11:11:54 PM
The Pat's only block is the Ravens. If they get by them They win it all.
 
2012-01-08 11:12:21 PM
I don't give a rat's ass about the Broncos but NOTHING is more pleasurable than watching the brainless Tebow haters lose their shiat over this. I pray to every deity that Tebow wins it all just so I can witness the collective and literal explosion of countless douchebags' heads.
 
2012-01-08 11:14:25 PM

muck4doo: ununcle: ozzie_stu: I love his god and his god's priorities so much.

[static6.businessinsider.com image 400x300]ather
[www.pulitzer.org image 250x200]

Why don't you STFU. It's a football game. Are there not more appropriate places to insert your blatent misunderstanding of human nature? Post your "fly/fire" on the little black kids pic in the politic branch of fark,,, you farking loser. You're either a farking pathetic troll or a disfranchised Stiller fan. Ether way,,, STFU.

No shiat. That's just gross man.

/GO PATS!!!!!

Amazing how posting the "free cat" pic is a bannable offense here, but that one is a-ok.

 
2012-01-08 11:14:46 PM

Contrabulous Flabtraption: I don't give a rat's ass about the Broncos but NOTHING is more pleasurable than watching the brainless Tebow haters lose their shiat over this. I pray to every deity that Tebow wins it all just so I can witness the collective and literal explosion of countless douchebags' heads.


He can win three Superbowls in a row and they'll say he sucks because they don't want to admit they're closet believers.
 
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