FOUND IT!

Dead for Tax Reasons: I woke up this morning with a bad hangover and my penis was missing again!

Did you check down on Second Ave where all those people sell used books and other junk on the street?

Would you trust a doctor that uses scissors like that? I wouldn't.

So that's why I pissed down my leg this morning.

This happens all the time. It's detachable.

ew

A Penis Dr. with his own strip club? Is this some kind of bust?

FTFA:


Stay classy!

farkMcFark: This happens all the time. It's detachable.

I'm asking $20 for it but I'll sell it back to you for $17

FTFA: "he runs a private practice"

Hey! *rimshot*

I went to Rate My Doctor (new window) to read the hilarious comments, but there don't appear to be any entries. Maybe they took them down because of his existing lawsuit.

Oh well.

To lose one penis may be regarded as a misfortune; to lose both looks like carelessness.

code blue balls

Lab Monkey: To lose one penis may be regarded as a misfortune; to lose both looks like carelessness.

There's an old saying in Florida - I know it's in Texas, probably in Florida - that says, lose my penis once, shame on - ... - shame on you. Lose it - ... - You can't lose it again.

I'm not proud of this, but I have a morbid desire to see what the guy's private area looks like now. I've never see a penectomy before. And no, I'm not going to GIS it at work.

Part of me thought this was going to be a story about the unfortunate return to the news of John Bobbitt. Then I thought it was going to be about some poor diphallic schlep in a poor part of India who had to get them cut off. Then I cringed at the phrase, "partial penectomy."

He can find some spares, they are all up in New Hampshire running for the GOP nomination.

partial penectomy.

That's a real dick (re)move

This is where Middle Eastern justice system should be applied. This Hank fella should be able to chop off Dr. Perito's penis with his weapon of choice.

In the "comments " section:

Libellous and abusive comments are not allowed. Please read our House Rules

Comments section is totally void...

"Welcome to FARK!"

BurnShrike: Lab Monkey: To lose one penis may be regarded as a misfortune; to lose both looks like carelessness.

There's an old saying in Florida - I know it's in Texas, probably in Florida - that says, lose my penis once, shame on - ... - shame on you. Lose it - ... - You can't lose it again.

And that saying is absolutely correct! Once you've lost a penis, you can't lose it again. Dubya ain't as dumb as people make him out to be...

mod3072: I'm not proud of this, but I have a morbid desire to see what the guy's private area looks like now. I've never see a penectomy before. And no, I'm not going to GIS it at work.

If you hang out on 4chan long enough... CANNOT BE UNSEEN

I wonder what King Missile was on when they wrote that song.....

Dr. Paul Perito

Isn't perrito slang for "little penis" in Spanish?

The latest lawsuit comes from a man, known only as Hank, who was in jail for drink-driving when he developed blisters on his penis three years ago.


"I GOT BLISTERS ON ME DINGER!"

BohemianGraham: b) why do the viagra and other male enhancement drugs say if you have an erection longer than 5 hours, get your ass to a doctor?

Because doctors need love too.

BurnShrike: FOUND IT!

[img855.imageshack.us image 512x640]

Here is the other one:

hugram: farkMcFark: This happens all the time. It's detachable.

I'm asking $20 for it but I'll sell it back to you for $17

Just make sure you wash it off before you put it back on.

Haven't heard that song in years.

poot_rootbeer: Dr. Paul Perito

Isn't perrito slang for "little penis" in Spanish?

little dog. pretty much the same thing.

But now and then I go to a party, get drunk,
and the next morning I can't for the life of me remember what I did with it.
First I looked around my apartment, and I couldn't find it.
So I called up the place where the party was,
they hadn't seen it either.
I asked them to check the medicine cabinet
'cause for some reason I leave it there sometimes

But not this time.

Picture of the doctor:

poot_rootbeer: Dr. Paul Perito

Isn't perrito slang for "little penis" in Spanish?

That would be penito.

You can call him Dr. P.P., for short.

really,
really short.

His pants no longer fit him like a glove.

When I first saw the headline I thought it said "What's worse than a long penis?"

Been there, done that (once as a mechanoid and once as a brief human)

Finding half a penis in your sandwich?

If he loses a third, he'll have a tridickta.

/meh

Six inches forward, five inches back!

boatbetty: BurnShrike: FOUND IT!

[img855.imageshack.us image 512x640]

Here is the other one:

[i43.tinypic.com image 288x341]

I'd like to feel bad for the guy, but something tells me that he was doing something with his wanger in jail he shouldn't be doing. If you are in jail for DUI for two years you are obviously a repeat danger to society. If, during those two years, you suddenly get dong-blisters...well, you been doing something awful. I really don't find much pity for a sodomistic repeat drunk driver.

This is my penis. There are many like it, but this one is mine.

My penis is my best friend. It is my life. I must masterbate it as I must master my life.

My penis, without me, is useless. Without my penis, I am useless. I must fire my penis true. I must shoot straighter than my enemy who is trying to cuckold me. I must shoot her before he shoots her. I will...

My penis and myself know that what counts in this war is not the jiz we fire, the noise of our burst, or the grunts we make. We know that it is the hits that count. We will hit it...

My penis is human, even as I, because it is my life. Thus, I will let it do the thinking. I will learn its weaknesses, its strength, its parts, its accessories, its sights and its sack. I will keep my penis clean and ready, even as I am clean and ready. We will become part of each other. We will...

Before God, I swear this creed. My penis and myself are the defenders of me. We are the masters of our enemy. We are the saviors of my life.

So be it, until victory is America's and there is no enemy, but poonanny!