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(TMZ) Strange Lisa Lampanelli to NBC: "I'm like Rosa Parks, don't sit me in the back of the bus." Somewhere in the afterlife, Greg Giraldo is choking on his drink   (tmz.com) divider line 47
More: Strange, Lisa Lampanelli, Rosa Parks, NBC, Greg Giraldo, Teresa Giudice, hatchets  
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4444 clicks; posted to Entertainment » on 05 Jan 2012 at 8:51 PM   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»   |    Get this fabulous T-Shirt and impress the methane out of your friends! shirt it!



47 Comments   (+0 »)
   
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest
 
FishyFred [TotalFark]
2012-01-05 08:14:56 PM
11th row? She should see what they did to Larry David.
 
AdolfOliverPanties [TotalFark]
2012-01-05 08:31:03 PM
NBC didn't want her sitting courtside near so many big athletic black men.

It would be in bad taste to have that cow fingering herself on national television.
 
MoeSzyslak
2012-01-05 08:55:29 PM
[Lisa's act] I'm fat and I bang black guys! [/Lisa's act]
 
CaptainScrewy
2012-01-05 08:56:30 PM
I hate people who say "Who?" But...who?
 
Apos [TotalFark]
2012-01-05 08:56:33 PM
Lisa Lampanelli: The Italian-American Chelsea Handler? Discuss.
 
12349876
2012-01-05 08:56:34 PM
MoeSzyslak: [Lisa's act] I'm fat and I bang black guys! [/Lisa's act]

She's married to a white guy now. Though she does call him Jimmy Big Balls.
 
RoosterCogburn [TotalFark]
2012-01-05 09:01:27 PM
AdolfOliverPanties: NBC didn't want her sitting courtside near so many big athletic black men.

It would be in bad taste to have that cow fingering herself on national television.

While it WOULDN'T be insulting to have that heifer in a unitard, dancing to sexy music on live TV? You thought it was bad when Nancy Grace had a nipple pop out - just wait til you see that fat hogs clenis flopping on stage.
 
Gordon Bennett
2012-01-05 09:07:16 PM
Lisa tells us, NBC called her up today to say sorry for the faux pas -- after it asked Lisa to attend the game as a favor to promote "Celebrity Apprentice" ... then insulted her with an 11th row seat, while her co-stars Teresa Giudice and Dayana Mendoza sat courtside.

In other words, they gave her a free ticket and she decided that that wasn't good enough for her.
 
Crewmannumber6
2012-01-05 09:08:55 PM
I've seen her for years on tv. Still waiting for her to say something funny.
 
foo monkey
2012-01-05 09:10:07 PM
Who is Greg Giraldo?
 
MagSeven
2012-01-05 09:11:48 PM
foo monkey: Who is Greg Giraldo?

What is Google?
 
Apos [TotalFark]
2012-01-05 09:13:05 PM
foo monkey: Who is Greg Giraldo?


Only one of the funniest celeb roast comedians who ever lived.

/Rest in peace,you magnificent bastard.
 
Farnn
2012-01-05 09:15:16 PM
I had totally forgotten that Greg Giraldo had died. Reading the headline I was trying to figure out the joke, and then remembered the whole afterlife thing wasn't a joke.
 
bravian
2012-01-05 09:22:15 PM
Considering her size - this is just common sense. Otherwise that bus is not going anywhere because the front wheels won't be touching the ground.
 
DanInKansas
2012-01-05 09:31:37 PM
Lisa -- just because you like to fark black, doesn't mean you are black.
 
TeddyRooseveltsMustache
2012-01-05 09:47:46 PM
Fat stupid and loud is no way to go through life, slut.
 
Cookbook's Anarchist
2012-01-05 10:16:57 PM
MoeSzyslak: [Lisa's act] I'm fat and I bang black guys! [/Lisa's act]

Don't forget the occasional ethnic slurs to sprinkle in some variety.
 
One Bad Apple
2012-01-05 10:32:37 PM
MoeSzyslak: [Lisa's act] I'm fat and I bang black guys! [/Lisa's act]

That's weird, I've never heard her say you were fat.

/Everyone knows about you and black guys tho
 
poot_rootbeer
2012-01-05 10:40:52 PM
She's like Rosa Parks in that she calls a black guy 'Daddy'.
 
nervoust
2012-01-05 10:41:23 PM
Maybe they didn't want you to break the cameras you ugly hippo
 
Gen. Patton Harvey Oswalt
2012-01-05 11:17:59 PM
Apos: foo monkey: Who is Greg Giraldo?


Only one of the funniest celeb roast comedians who ever lived.

/Rest in peace,you magnificent bastard.

This.

"Gilbert Gottfried is famously cheap. I'm impressed you're here Gilbert. You gotta buy new clothes and take a week off work just to do this. But you showed up. You tightened your belt and you came. You're like David Carradine."

RIP
 
salvador.hardin
2012-01-05 11:18:55 PM
Mmmm.... smells like publicity.
 
HopScotchNSoda
2012-01-05 11:24:30 PM
In the immortal words of Bob Uecker (or, rather, the words of the copy writer for Miller Lite):
cdn.bleacherreport.net
"Hey, I must be in the front row!"
 
coeyagi
2012-01-06 12:03:02 AM
CaptainScrewy: I hate people who say "Who?" But...who?

Double U x 3.google.com
 
Cyno01 [TotalFark]
2012-01-06 12:29:39 AM
Whats her appeal? Like at all?
 
coeyagi
2012-01-06 12:41:20 AM
Cyno01: Whats her appeal? Like at all?

Her schtick used to be funny. And then when it turned out her schtick wasn't going to incorporate any new material whatsoever, her schtick wasn't worth dick.
 
bdub77 [TotalFark]
2012-01-06 12:51:17 AM
She'll never be a Hall of Fame comedian like other women like....you know, what's her name and...umm...Gallagher?
 
The_Sponge [TotalFark]
2012-01-06 01:06:15 AM
I'm willing to be that Rosa Parks told better jokes.
 
steamingpile
2012-01-06 01:23:57 AM
Apos: Lisa Lampanelli: The Italian-American Chelsea Handler? Discuss.

No lisa can actually be funny, chelsea hadnler is painfully unfunny.

And lisa should know by now, all the hideous beasts get sat where the public wont get sick while watching the game.
 
buckeyebrain
2012-01-06 01:27:42 AM
Cookbook's Anarchist: MoeSzyslak: [Lisa's act] I'm fat and I bang black guys! [/Lisa's act]

Don't forget the occasional ethnic slurs to sprinkle in some variety.

Don't forget the occasional FredPhelps-esque audist rant to sprinkle in even more variety.
 
mikebellman
2012-01-06 01:34:51 AM
Gen. Patton Harvey Oswalt: Apos: foo monkey: Who is Greg Giraldo?
Only one of the funniest celeb roast comedians who ever lived.

/Rest in peace,you magnificent bastard.

This.

"Gilbert Gottfried is famously cheap. I'm impressed you're here Gilbert. You gotta buy new clothes and take a week off work just to do this. But you showed up. You tightened your belt and you came. You're like David Carradine."

RIP

DOUBLE THIS. If I had access to a time machine, rescuing Greg Giraldo would be towards the top of the roster. (As well as Abbie Hoffmann, Lenny Bruce and Obama's farrquad dad.)

/You heard me.
 
HighZoolander [TotalFark]
2012-01-06 01:45:14 AM
Best Greg Giraldo joke: "Lisa Lampanelli has a lot in common with the Octomom. She's never given birth, but she has had 80 fingers inside her at the same time."
 
1000 Ways to Dye
2012-01-06 02:29:32 AM
Why wouldn't she want to sit in the back of the bus? That's where all the black guys are.
 
Duck_of_Doom
2012-01-06 03:13:17 AM
Cookbook's Anarchist: MoeSzyslak: [Lisa's act] I'm fat and I bang black guys! [/Lisa's act]

Don't forget the occasional ethnic slurs to sprinkle in some variety.

And jokes about gay men.

Seriously, her schtick came right out of Barrens/xbox live chat. She really needs to incorporate Chuck Norris jokes at this point.
 
LewDux
2012-01-06 04:04:36 AM
The_Sponge: I'm willing to be that Rosa Parks told better jokes.

i.qkme.me
 
H. W. Plainview
2012-01-06 06:15:53 AM
Somewhere in the afterlife, Greg Giraldo is choking on his drink because he took to many pills with it.
 
Jake Havechek
2012-01-06 07:43:01 AM
Fat, ugly, and unfunny is no way to go through life.
 
scally1
2012-01-06 08:02:38 AM
more blacks in her than a set of handcuffs.
 
poot_rootbeer
2012-01-06 08:05:32 AM
She's also like a bus, in that there's always a couple black men riding her. And she prefers them in the back.
 
rbaron71
2012-01-06 08:23:50 AM
I thought she lost a lot of weight last year, no?
 
H31N0US
2012-01-06 09:42:56 AM
She and Zach Giligianakis or Dane Cook should breed and create the least funny person to have ever graced this planet.
 
beerrun
2012-01-06 09:56:49 AM
She is absolutely painful to watch.
Seriously. I've laughed harder looking at the growth pattern of my big toenail.
 
Wendy's Chili
2012-01-06 10:42:18 AM
Apos: foo monkey: Who is Greg Giraldo?


Only one of the funniest celeb roast comedians who ever lived.

/Rest in peace,you magnificent bastard.

It's sad that he's known as a "roast comedian". His stand-up was hilarious.
 
Orgasmatron138
2012-01-06 11:18:50 AM
I know all the roasters love her, but I've never heard a worse one-joke act than Lisa's.

I take that back; Margaret Cho doing the "MY MOM IS THE FUNNY ASIAN THAT TALKS LIKE THIS!" bit is worse.
 
dosboot
2012-01-06 11:25:26 AM
Apos: foo monkey: Who is Greg Giraldo?


Only one of the funniest celeb roast comedians who ever lived.

/Rest in peace,you magnificent bastard.


So true.

Hint Foo Monkey: Next time you don't know something, consult the book of knowledge.
 
The_Sponge [TotalFark]
2012-01-06 12:26:18 PM
LewDux: The_Sponge: I'm willing to bet that Rosa Parks told better jokes.

[i.qkme.me image 333x480]


I LOL'd.
 
Monster Island [TotalFark]
2012-01-06 04:38:47 PM
Wendy's Chili: His stand-up was hilarious.

Indeed.
 
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