I'd check the local democrat party office for culprits. Sounds like they've decided to start enforcing their beloved death tax on an ad hoc basis.

You know, maybe it's just me, but when I die, I'd rather my family not waste the money on bronze things, or a gravestone, or a grave for that matter. This whole idea of "making sure the dead rest in peace and are happy" seems really odd to me. The dead probably don't care.

Someone is a jerk for the theft, but don't pretend the dead care.

also, Forced Perspective, you're kind of a tool and it's too early for that kind of thing.

Lets not forget the stealing wheelchairs. There is a special place in hell for those folks.

"I think they heard my husband coming and just dropped them," she said.


I would have done the same, I don't want to see an old man masturbating in a cemetery much less anywhere else.

socratesthekidd: You know, maybe it's just me, but when I die, I'd rather my family not waste the money on bronze things, or a gravestone, or a grave for that matter. This whole idea of "making sure the dead rest in peace and are happy" seems really odd to me. The dead probably don't care.

Someone is a jerk for the theft, but don't pretend the dead care.

also, Forced Perspective, you're kind of a tool and it's too early for that kind of thing.

I don't think many people think the dead do care. It's for the living, and who are you to tell them how to mourn a dead loved one?

I agree with you on the Boobies though. That's just dickish.

monoski: Lets not forget the stealing wheelchairs. There is a special place in hell for those folks.

Those wheelchairs must be stopped.

/Clowns to the left of me, jokers to the right, here i am

socratesthekidd: also, Forced Perspective, you're kind of a tool and it's too early for that kind of thing.

I'm not the one who advocates for seizing yet more wealth after a lifetime of taxation. Graverobbers of antiquity, the democrat party, and these thieves disagree. I fail to see how that reflects poorly on *me*.

Pressure switches and blasting caps will solve this problem.

Next thing you know people will be pulling the gold teeth out of corpses...

Low. Low thing to do that to a body.


/nothin' but a couple of fidlam bens.

LoneDoggie: Next thing you know people will be pulling the gold teeth out of corpses...

[th115.photobucket.com image 160x160]

Or turning them into a food source for the masses.

No, subby, they haven't reached how low can you go just yet. Wait until someone discovers where the people who have copper caskets are buried. Then they'll be digging up the graves and discarding the bodies for that scrap metal.

I remember the public park about a mile down the road had a "wishing well" when I was a kid. Couldn't have been more than 12 or 15 feet deep. It had been there for over 150 years.

I wonder how easy it would be to excavate on the sly. There has to be thousands of coins down there.

When I finally kick the bucket, I want my loved ones to use as few resources to depose of me as possible (within health-code laws, of course, so no throwing my body in the dumpster). I am human, and therefore take a lot of resources upon being alive, so the least I can do is use as few as possible upon death.

Burials are a waste of resources, land and money. I am thinking cremated and then scattered somewhere.

About 6' lower to be exact.

Someone stole bronze plaques and vases from the graves of my Mother, Grandparents and Aunts last year, its a total Dick move. I don't know if they will burn in hell for it but I'm counting on Karma.

/Graveyard was in nice neighborhood when granddad died in 1932, now its crackhead central, rollup the windows and lock the doors every time we go there

Forced Perspective: socratesthekidd: also, Forced Perspective, you're kind of a tool and it's too early for that kind of thing.

I'm not the one who advocates for seizing yet more wealth after a lifetime of taxation. Graverobbers of antiquity, the democrat party, and these thieves disagree. I fail to see how that reflects poorly on *me*.

Because the money is being transferred and any time money is being moved from one individual, and remember corporations are individuals now, to another it should be taxed for the good of society.

I'm sorry you have been preached to and come to believe that taxation is theft as religious dogma. Your dogma makes it hard to come to a reasonable compromise on this issue as your unreasonable religion means you are not rational on this point.

The sad truth is that people who believe as you do will cause this country to fail economically as they don't believe that the big scary numbers of what it is going to cost the government when the Baby Boomers retire means we need to drastically raise taxes and we need to do it right now, not when the bill comes do.

If they are so special, why are they dead?

Do you know who else stole metal from the dead?

why do they have to be brass flower vases?

Use glass/ceramic vases:
you win, because you're not paying big bucks for a simple graveside accessory
robbers lose, because they'd have no resale value

Pottstown PA Over three hundred brass vases stolen from the local grave yard.

Barto PA (just north of Pottstown) an eight foot tall brass angel was stolen from a shrine, cut up and sold for scrap.

West Chester PA, Brass grave markers for revolutionary war soldiers were stolen and ultimately recovered from a local creek.

My boyfriend works at a cemetery and says this is a rampant problem. Difference between their park and others, though, is that the head maintenance man actually lives in the cemetery with his family and whenever his dog gets growly he knows there are either thieves out there or teenagers sneaking around to either screw, drink, or re-enact The Craft. Or a combination of the three.

So he takes out his shot gun, hops in the truck, and roams around the park scaring off anyone around. He's caught a number of people in the act of robbing the graves and has pressed charges, along with the funeral home that owns the park, to the fullest extent of the law. Despite the tens of thousands of dollars they've had to spend over the years replacing these vases apparently it's no where near the number that the neighboring parks have had to pay out.

Also, as for those wondering why scrap dealers aren't blowing the whistle, many of these people don't even know what they're getting most of the time. The legit ones will call the cops if they suspect something funny but many times these dealers say that when the metal is brought to them the thieves broke it up in smaller pieces, already melted some of it down or would disfigure it enough that you wouldn't be able to out right recognize it at a glance.

compost anyone

Also, I've made it clear to my family that once I kick it I want to be wrapped in 100% cotton, placed in an untreated pine box, and laid in the earth of a park or something that would double as a land preserve, or some land that doubles as a farm. The marker could be made out of granite, but it won't matter to anyone beyond my immediate survivors will it?

furterfan: why do they have to be brass flower vases?

Use glass/ceramic vases:
you win, because you're not paying big bucks for a simple graveside accessory
robbers lose, because they'd have no resale value

And then the dicks that steal the vases to begin with will just smash yours out of spite.

The woman in the article says she blames the cemetery for the thefts. I don't think that makes any sense. Is the cemetery supposed to post armed guards at each graveside, run barbed wire fences around the properties? Cemeteries are supposed to be wide open spaces, and are supposed to be welcoming to visitors, not armed camps.

\or maybe I should go back on my meds

Happy Hours: I saw a related story about this happening in England the other day (on BBC, I think).

Works of art and war memorials are being stolen. You'd think they could regulate the scrap metal business and at least document where something supposedly came from and who sold it.

The news story I saw the other night showed the remains of a WWI memorial that had the plaque taken off. If I'm a scrap metal dealer and I see that brought to me do I just say "Well, my grandpappy was a piano player in a whorehouse during WWI so I'm okay with this."?

nothing is obscure on fark.com. nothing.

www.enotes.com/pianoplayers-salem/pia noplayers

That's pretty low, mister! If I had a rubber hose, I would beat you...

Minimally Hairy Beer-Powered Simian: The woman in the article says she blames the cemetery for the thefts. I don't think that makes any sense. Is the cemetery supposed to post armed guards at each graveside, run barbed wire fences around the properties? Cemeteries are supposed to be wide open spaces, and are supposed to be welcoming to visitors, not armed camps.

\or maybe I should go back on my meds

Some are a little more secured than others.

One in my hometown, Iowa City (home of the Black Angel for those who know or care), says it has hours but no one is ever around and there's no gate to lock, and no one patrols.

In Tucson I lived across from a cemetery that celebrated its centennial a few years ago, someone patrols after dark but that's about it. I think that has more to do with the fact that it's not in a great part of town and coyotes hole up in the back of it.

Our dumbarse newspaper confused replacement value with scrap value when they published that the city's manhole covers are worth $800. I am watching the road a little closer these days.

On the positive, people are finally scrapping the junk cars and appliances that litter their yards.

I think it's legal to "shoot to kill" looters. I think these people fall into the same category. Then sell their cadavers to science as an amusing twist.

I should probably clarify, I understand where the lady is coming from but I don't know if the owners are legally responsible for protecting the sites. Probably depends on if it's a perpetual care cemetery or not.

Old news is so exciting.

Why is stealing scrap metal from the dead worse then stealing scrap metal from the living?

They're dead. Its not like they are going to miss it. Or were even using it for anything?

(Not saying its not bad, just that stealing from the living is worse)

Serge Storms would know how to deal with this.

cig-mkr: Even better yet, stealing fire hydrants for scrap metal....
Link (new window)

FTA: "He made it to where he fit in and looked like he was doing normal construction work," Hurst said. "He really went the extra mile."

Sometimes you have to spend money to make money.

The simple solution is exile. (Metal) thieves, when caught at it (stress on the caught, and not merely convicted; perhaps include heads-of-meth as well), should be attached to self-opening parachutes and dropped from high-altitude aircraft over nations we're none-too-fond-of. We'd even put $100 in local currency in their pockets.

My mother is buried in this cemetery. It's got two entrances, both of which are gated after 5pm or so, if I remember correctly. It's otherwise a rather large open space adjacent to MacArthur Airport, two side-by-side Jewish cemeteries, an old disused industrial area, and a large open-air mall.

I feel for this lady, as I'd certainly be upset if If I found my mother's grave, etc. disturbed - hell, it's annoying enough when people steal flowers that you planted. But short of security constantly strolling through the sections, I'm not sure how you'd be able to keep a close enough eye on folks during the day to make sure that they were just there tending grave sites and not stealing bronze vases. (I say during the day since the woman claims her husband scared them the thieves, and the cemetery closes in the evening).

My advice to her would be to simply stop putting bronze vases out. Since the thefts are occurring in one small section, and she keeps replacing the vase, she may as well hang a banner too to let the thieves know whenever there's a new vase for them to grab. I don't see the thefts stopping until the economy improves...

Take your bronze vase and lather it in grease. Then when they try and pick it up, they will get their hands all greasy. Ha, ha!, or use poop instead.

Ed Finnerty: I blame Skyrim.

It practically teaches our children to loot from the dead and buried. I hope someone finds this person and draugrs them to the police station.

I was going to do that, then I took an arrow in the knee.