Mr. Coffee Nerves: Who's telling Newt "the best way to stand out in a crowded field is to mention your opponent's name as much as humanly possible?"

The lazy staffer who gathered Newt's signatures in Virginia. Why? Do you think he might not be fully committed to his boss?

This is simply the GOP eating itself from within - beating up the fat kid if you will.

Swift boating was an attack on an American soldier/hero.

/big difference chubby

Havya noticed that Newt really doesn't bring up his own past performance record?

/Wonder why.

So I guess "Gingrich-boating" is standing there with a gun shooting holes in the bottom of your campaign?

This is how King of the Hill is played.

I assume that romney-boating is a derivative of swiftboating. I'm confused though, because Gingrich talks about being romney-boated as if it's a bad thing, full of lies and deceit; while swiftboating was nothing but ads full of truth, justice, and the american way.

I've been away for a while, but are Republicans now tacitly admitting that the attacks on Kerry were spurious and shameful?

LouDobbsAwaaaay: This is what blind panic looks like.

That graph is hilarious. Is it real?

Did the little newt see a scary monster under his bed last night? Did he get scared he wouldn't sell anything today?

Romney-boating sounds like an unnatural act between to presidential candidates. Guess Newt is branching out in his infidelity.

Some people never grow up.

Also, is Newt saying the attacks were unfounded against Kerry too?

Read that as Romney-bated, which I imagine is getting a handjob from someone telling you "I love you, I hate you, I love you, I hate you..."

carrion_luggage: Poor, poor Douche Thingbiatch.

Thatch Smackdorf.

So, I'll just leave this here: the 2011 update of the Candidates song (some nsfw lyrics)

The version from four years ago, featuring both republicans and democrats, is even better (but apparently not on youtube)


Karac: I'm confused though, because Gingrich talks about being romney-boated as if it's a bad thing, full of lies and deceit; while swiftboating was nothing but ads full of truth, justice, and the american way.

This was my first thought as well

Newt's just a fat ugly whiny baby.

Oh god, I need eye-bleach. This thread title conjures the mental image of Romney's face pressed between Newt's man-boobs.
"thbbb-b-bbb-bbbbb"

I've been rewatching some old MST3K episodes, and even they toss in a few Newt Gingrich slams every now and then.

No one liked him in the 90s, and no one likes him now.

Also, "Romney-Boat" sounds like an awful sitcom idea.

PlatinumDragon: carrion_luggage: Poor, poor Douche Thingbiatch.

Thatch Smackdorf.

Slab Bulkhead.

DarwiOdrade: "He would buy an election if he could," Gingrich told NBC News.

Like you wouldn't, Newtie. You're just jealous and having another tantrum.

He's just upset that he can't charge the election to his Tiffany's account.

blueyedevil: I've been away for a while, but are Republicans now tacitly admitting that the attacks on Kerry were spurious and shameful?

good catch.

Please tell me thing-boating isn't actually becoming a phrase the way thing-gate did.

Someone save the English language from the Americans.

ReverendJasen: Oh god, I need eye-bleach. This thread title conjures the mental image of Romney's face pressed between Newt's man-boobs.
"thbbb-b-bbb-bbbbb"

Imagine after two minutes of Romney playing the motorboat with Gingrich's melons, Newt says: "Candace..... YOU WERE RIGHT!"

Ed Finnerty: magusdevil: Please tell me thing-boating isn't actually becoming a phrase the way thing-gate did.

Someone save the English language from the Americans.

Don't be so quick to throw thing-boating under the bus.

If we're not careful, we may in fact see a surge of thing-boating.

The Name: PlatinumDragon: carrion_luggage: Poor, poor Douche Thingbiatch.

Thatch Smackdorf.

Slab Bulkhead.

I dunno; that's from the original list and not terribly befitting the Newt.

/Whinge Pastyman.

FTA:
"The Speaker's 'Jobs and Growth Bus Tour' continues Monday"

or, correctly named, "The Speaker's 'Things we've obstructed since Obama was elected Bus Tour'

Guess they'd need a bigger bus for that sign....

"By informing the voters of the facts exactly as they transpired, Romney is putting Gingrich and his multitude of personal and professional problems in an unfounded negative light."

If we can make Santorum mean something, then I propose that "bachmann" should mean one of two things:

1. The state of being paranoid and insane; Believing there are multiple, often contradictory conspiracies that threaten your beliefs, religion, way of life, or well-being.

2. The state of being in a marriage of convenience to deny or disguise one or both spouses' homosexuality.

Uses:

You see that guy over there in the cowboy hat with all the crazy buttons on it? He's completely bachmann. He claimed he saw Muslim Nazis killing his dog in 1986, and he's been bachmann ever since.

Liza and David Gest? Totally bachmann.

Crabs_Can_Polevault: The Name: PlatinumDragon: carrion_luggage: Poor, poor Douche Thingbiatch.

Thatch Smackdorf.

Slab Bulkhead.

I dunno; that's from the original list and not terribly befitting the Newt.

/Whinge Pastyman.

Cry Babydump

hubiestubert: He's in a Primary. This is what happens in the Primaries. If he doesn't understand that, how in the fark is he supposed to lead?

He is a whining child, and petulant isn't a quality I want to see in my party, let alone the highest office of the land.

Really, who didn't see this coming?

It's only okay if it's done to Democrats.
Also, for the record Newt, "swift-boating" only occurs when you tell lies about your opponent.

God's Hubris: It's only okay if it's done to Democrats.
Also, for the record Newt, "swift-boating" only occurs when you tell lies about your opponent.

To Newt, lies = anything that makes Newt look bad. Especially if it's true.

This is a guy who truly believes there is a different set of rules for himself and another one for everyone else.

stoli n coke: God's Hubris: It's only okay if it's done to Democrats.
Also, for the record Newt, "swift-boating" only occurs when you tell lies about your opponent.

To Newt, lies = anything that makes Newt look bad. Especially if it's true.
This is a guy who truly believes there is a different set of rules for himself and another one for everyone else.


Around here, we simply call those people "republicans."

Newt is angry that his past is coming back to haunt him. So he's blaming others.

Sociopath!

apoptotic: DarwiOdrade: "He would buy an election if he could," Gingrich told NBC News.

Like you wouldn't, Newtie. You're just jealous and having another tantrum.

He's just upset that he can't charge the election to his Tiffany's account.

I think he's more upset that he can't charge his Tiffany's account to his campaign. Why should he have to pay for all the sparkly stuff? That's what donors are for.

biatch Shutdown! Snot Slobbercry! Portly Gobblecock! Flub Manblubber! Teary Facebutter! Eddie!

Why does the author of that piece refer to Gingrich as Speaker throughout? I didn't realize that one retained the title despite disgrace and resignation.