FARK.com: (6854245) Pokemon championship claimed by 26-year-old man who has most likely never touched a woman and will die alone

(Some Guy)		Pokemon championship claimed by 26-year-old man who has most likely never touched a woman and will die alone (triblocal.com)		110
		More: Sad, Pokemon, Orland Park, meyers, Chicago metropolitan area, Oak Park

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7003 clicks; posted to Geek » on 01 Jan 2012 at 10:45 AM | Favorite | share:

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110 Comments (+0 »)

View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest

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EmRack

2012-01-01 10:50:29 AM

I thought women liked winners??

PizzaJedi81

2012-01-01 10:56:29 AM

EmRack: I thought women liked winners??

Besides, aren't there chick Pokemon players? I'm sure he'd get his choice of the Pokemon circuit.

Great_Milenko

2012-01-01 10:57:40 AM

Shouldn't any adult be able to excel at a children's game? I have no idea how to play pokemon (it's some sort of card game, right?) but I'm confident after reading the rules a few times and observing a few games I could beat the brains out of pretty much any 8 year old player.

Raw_fishFood

2012-01-01 10:58:22 AM

There were different age groups. So it's not like this guy beat a bunch of nine year olds to win.

Kurmudgeon

2012-01-01 10:59:55 AM

I used to watch my kids play the video games. It's like a Peter Max poster come to life....

Krieghund

2012-01-01 11:00:19 AM

If only there was an activity that would let this poor lonely man spend time with impressionable, malleable youths.

video man

2012-01-01 11:02:17 AM

PizzaJedi81: EmRack: I thought women liked winners??

Besides, aren't there chick Pokemon players? I'm sure he'd get his choice of the Pokemon circuit.

Yeah, this. I don't play the pokaymans anymore, but there's a good amount of females that are into it.

jayhawk88

2012-01-01 11:07:54 AM

PizzaJedi81: EmRack: I thought women liked winners??

Besides, aren't there chick Pokemon players? I'm sure he'd get his choice of the Pokemon circuit.

pedobear.3hoursites.com

Preach it, brother!

SockMonkeyHolocaust

2012-01-01 11:10:05 AM

Maybe he's just goal oriented and had to catch them all.

Doctor Squirtle

2012-01-01 11:19:31 AM

I saw a Squirtle.

inkblot

2012-01-01 11:21:31 AM

Sock Ruh Tease

2012-01-01 11:22:57 AM

Pokemon made me good at math.

t3knomanser

2012-01-01 11:26:17 AM

Great_Milenko: Shouldn't any adult be able to excel at a children's game? I have no idea how to play pokemon (it's some sort of card game, right?) but I'm confident after reading the rules a few times and observing a few games I could beat the brains out of pretty much any 8 year old player.

I'm pretty ignorant as to Pokemon's specific ruleset, but from what I know of CCGs, the card combinations get complex in a non-linear fashion, and it requires a deep knowledge not only of each card, but how their modifiers stack. Building a competitive deck is very much an NP hard problem with a surprisingly massive dataset.

MoronLessOff

2012-01-01 11:29:35 AM

video man: PizzaJedi81: EmRack: I thought women liked winners??

Besides, aren't there chick Pokemon players? I'm sure he'd get his choice of the Pokemon circuit.

Yeah, this. I don't play the pokaymans anymore, but there's a good amount of females that are into it.

MTG, on the other hand, is a sausage fest.

PizzaJedi81

2012-01-01 11:31:32 AM

MoronLessOff: video man: PizzaJedi81: EmRack: I thought women liked winners??

Besides, aren't there chick Pokemon players? I'm sure he'd get his choice of the Pokemon circuit.

Yeah, this. I don't play the pokaymans anymore, but there's a good amount of females that are into it.

MTG, on the other hand, is a sausage fest.

Something I've pondered before...what's the opposite of a sausage fest? A clam bake? Taco-rama? Inquiring minds want to know!

video man

2012-01-01 11:33:07 AM

PizzaJedi81: MoronLessOff: video man: PizzaJedi81: EmRack: I thought women liked winners??

Besides, aren't there chick Pokemon players? I'm sure he'd get his choice of the Pokemon circuit.

Yeah, this. I don't play the pokaymans anymore, but there's a good amount of females that are into it.

MTG, on the other hand, is a sausage fest.

Something I've pondered before...what's the opposite of a sausage fest? A clam bake? Taco-rama? Inquiring minds want to know!

Pie party?

MoronLessOff

2012-01-01 11:35:02 AM

PizzaJedi81: Something I've pondered before...what's the opposite of a sausage fest? A clam bake? Taco-rama? Inquiring minds want to know!

My mind says pillow fight, but that's only in my imagination.

Let it be known, from this day forward the opposite of a sausage fest will be known as a Clam Bake!

SundaesChild

2012-01-01 11:42:54 AM

PizzaJedi81: EmRack: I thought women liked winners??

Besides, aren't there chick Pokemon players? I'm sure he'd get his choice of the Pokemon circuit.

When my kid was little one of my discipinary methods was to take away her Gameboy. She could have it back when I got bored playing Pokemon.

thefireandpassion

2012-01-01 11:47:05 AM

Nuclear Monk

2012-01-01 11:48:13 AM

t3knomanser: Great_Milenko: Shouldn't any adult be able to excel at a children's game? I have no idea how to play pokemon (it's some sort of card game, right?) but I'm confident after reading the rules a few times and observing a few games I could beat the brains out of pretty much any 8 year old player.

I'm pretty ignorant as to Pokemon's specific ruleset, but from what I know of CCGs, the card combinations get complex in a non-linear fashion, and it requires a deep knowledge not only of each card, but how their modifiers stack. Building a competitive deck is very much an NP hard problem with a surprisingly massive dataset.

Not sure that line is going to impress the chicks either.

Kuta

2012-01-01 11:53:15 AM

A CCG farkers can get behind...
Vampire: The Eternal Struggle!

www.vteschecklist.com

MoronLessOff

2012-01-01 12:00:44 PM

Kuta: A CCG farkers can get behind...
Vampire: The Eternal Struggle!

[www.vteschecklist.com image 356x500]
[www.tolaria.com image 363x513]
[sussu.chez.com image 376x522]

Or this one:
upload.wikimedia.org

thisone

2012-01-01 12:01:59 PM

t3knomanser: Great_Milenko: Shouldn't any adult be able to excel at a children's game? I have no idea how to play pokemon (it's some sort of card game, right?) but I'm confident after reading the rules a few times and observing a few games I could beat the brains out of pretty much any 8 year old player.

I'm pretty ignorant as to Pokemon's specific ruleset, but from what I know of CCGs, the card combinations get complex in a non-linear fashion, and it requires a deep knowledge not only of each card, but how their modifiers stack. Building a competitive deck is very much an NP hard problem with a surprisingly massive dataset.

hmmm, wonder if anyone's ever built an application that, given a superset of cards (ie all the ones you have), will produce deck recommendations.

Subtle_Canary

2012-01-01 12:08:34 PM

Whats the problem? Im 29 now and i remember when Pokemon first came out when i was in Middle School. This guy probably grew up playing it. Its no different than if a 30 year old man won a farking Street Fighter tournament....

ArtosRC

2012-01-01 12:25:38 PM

I haven't touched my deck in a decade, but I thought they were only allowed sixty cards in the deck. Article says a hundred.

TOO MUCH CHANGE I CAN NEVER GO BACK

Magorn

2012-01-01 12:26:14 PM

The Flexecutioner

2012-01-01 01:00:05 PM

Kurmudgeon: I used to watch my kids play the video games. It's like a Peter Max poster come to life....

would make a great porn name.

Barakku

2012-01-01 01:16:22 PM

Great_Milenko: Shouldn't any adult be able to excel at a children's game? I have no idea how to play pokemon (it's some sort of card game, right?) but I'm confident after reading the rules a few times and observing a few games I could beat the brains out of pretty much any 8 year old player.

That's not really how competition works. No one adult can excel just because it's a kid's game. If that were the case, then the instant a second adult were to play the children's game the playing field would already be leveled; adding additional adults only makes the title of winner more significant as the actual winner does actually have to stand out against the crowd.
/Statistics, how does it work?

Boxcutta

2012-01-01 01:19:22 PM

I thought for sure Herman Cain had a shot at the title this year.

phedex

2012-01-01 01:26:03 PM

95BV5

2012-01-01 01:43:48 PM

weirdneighbour

2012-01-01 01:49:33 PM

what year is this?

SN1987a goes boom

2012-01-01 01:52:21 PM

Gwyrddu

2012-01-01 01:52:49 PM

Boxcutta: I thought for sure Herman Cain had a shot at the title this year.

Well winning can be a challenge, winning can seem impossible, it's never easy when there is so much on the line.

lake_huron

2012-01-01 01:53:10 PM

phedex: [cache.ohinternet.com image 600x450]

MY POKEMONS
Let me show you them

/I feel dirty

rjakobi

2012-01-01 02:02:30 PM

Subtle_Canary: Whats the problem? Im 29 now and i remember when Pokemon first came out when i was in Middle School. This guy probably grew up playing it. Its no different than if a 30 year old man won a farking Street Fighter tournament....

I think the key here is that society expects us to move on to more adult-acceptable diversions after age 24. Society is a biatch about that.

I draw the line of societal expectations at Legos myself.

Mike_LowELL

2012-01-01 02:03:24 PM

Oh. It's one of those headlines where submitter explains to the world that he has never been talented at anything.

Great_Milenko: Shouldn't any adult be able to excel at a children's game? I have no idea how to play pokemon (it's some sort of card game, right?) but I'm confident after reading the rules a few times and observing a few games I could beat the brains out of pretty much any 8 year old player.

What children lack in physical ability, they can more-than-readily make up for in mental ability. Magnus Carlsen was a chess grandmaster at the age of twelve. The winner of the last Major League Gaming StarCraft even was sixteen years old. We have the term "child prodigy" for a reason, and it can just as readily apply to something as insignificant as a collectible card game.

Mike_LowELL

2012-01-01 02:04:02 PM

Carlsen was a grandmaster at the age of thirteen. I stand corrected.

Gwyrddu

2012-01-01 02:15:20 PM

rjakobi:
I think the key here is that society expects us to move on to more adult-acceptable diversions after age 24. Society is a biatch about that.

I draw the line of societal expectations at Legos myself.

I find it odd though that one of the most adult-acceptable diversions, being a sports fan, also seems the most childish to me. I mean most of these fans don't play the sports they are watching anymore, they are literally just watching someone else play a game and judging others worth based on which group of millionaires they wish to win.

Reminds me a bit of this poster:
verydemotivational.files.wordpress.com

BumpInTheNight

2012-01-01 02:16:45 PM

Did he get over 9000 points?

Ed Finnerty

2012-01-01 02:29:57 PM

XXXXL Scrub Top: Check
Iron-on Patches: Check
Morbidly Obese: Check
Neck Beard: Check
4chan Reference: Check

This guy seems legit.

SearchN

2012-01-01 03:02:02 PM

I'm friends with the guy that owns that painting.

[nerds.jpg]

/Damn thing was appraised at 10k. Not bad for a hobby. Of course he is stacking beta power 9 at this point, so not a good ROI.

Honest Bender

2012-01-01 03:12:03 PM

Ed Finnerty: XXXXL Scrub Top: Check
Iron-on Patches: Check
Morbidly Obese: Check
Neck Beard: Check
4chan Reference: Check

This guy seems legit.

I'm not seeing the 4chan reference...

Ed Finnerty

2012-01-01 03:22:50 PM

Honest Bender: Ed Finnerty: XXXXL Scrub Top: Check
Iron-on Patches: Check
Morbidly Obese: Check
Neck Beard: Check
4chan Reference: Check

This guy seems legit.

I'm not seeing the 4chan reference...

It's barely visible:

dtdstudios.com

RandomExcess

2012-01-01 03:24:56 PM

Isn't this just the card game war dressed up to seem interesting to children?

SharkTrager

2012-01-01 03:27:36 PM

MoronLessOff

2012-01-01 03:29:47 PM

SearchN: [www.wizards.com image 300x417]

I'm friends with the guy that owns that painting.

[nerds.jpg]

/Damn thing was appraised at 10k. Not bad for a hobby. Of course he is stacking beta power 9 at this point, so not a good ROI.

IIRC, Anson Maddox used to be my favorite artist. If nothing else than for this card:
t0.gstatic.com

Falcon Hunter

2012-01-01 03:37:57 PM

J. Frank Parnell

2012-01-01 04:44:14 PM

He knew it was his destiny.

RockofAges

2012-01-01 04:49:10 PM

MoronLessOff: SearchN: [www.wizards.com image 300x417]

I'm friends with the guy that owns that painting.

[nerds.jpg]

/Damn thing was appraised at 10k. Not bad for a hobby. Of course he is stacking beta power 9 at this point, so not a good ROI.

IIRC, Anson Maddox used to be my favorite artist. If nothing else than for this card:
[t0.gstatic.com image 188x268]

I'm all about Ploog, but I also love Bakshi's work so that makes sense.

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