Big week for the AFC North.

Pittsburgh- #5 seed guaranteed at the minimum. #2 seed if the Ravens lose to the Bengals in Cincinnati. #1 seed if they win, the Ravens lose and the Patriots lose in Buffalo.

Ratbirds- #2 seed with a win. #5 with a loss and a Steelers win at Cleveland.

Bengals- #6 seed with a win, or with a loss and a whole truckload of help that they won't get.

The Bengals are going to play hard before a sellout crowd with the playoffs at stake, and the Ravens don't do well at Paul Brown Stadium. The Patsies don't do well at Buffalo, either. The Steelers have a very real shot at the #1 and #2 seeds.

Favored and at home, not good signs for Denver, they have a tendency to blow games like these.

GO BRONCOS!

GO BOLTS! (God, I feel soo dirty saying that)

Adolf Oliver Nipples: The Bengals are going to play hard before a sellout crowd with the playoffs at stake, and the Ravens don't do well at Paul Brown Stadium. The Patsies don't do well at Buffalo, either. The Steelers have a very real shot at the #1 and #2 seeds.

You just keep telling yourself that. Or, you could book your flight to Denver because your ass is going on the road for the playoffs.

RminusQ: Adolf Oliver Nipples: The Bengals are going to play hard before a sellout crowd with the playoffs at stake, and the Ravens don't do well at Paul Brown Stadium. The Patsies don't do well at Buffalo, either. The Steelers have a very real shot at the #1 and #2 seeds.

You just keep telling yourself that. Or, you could book your flight to Denver because your ass is going on the road for the playoffs.

I'm fine with that. If it happens, though, the Ratbird fan butthurt will be legendary. You don't think the Bengals are going to be playing like rabid dogs trying to make the playoffs?

No Rodgers today. Lame.

Adolf Oliver Nipples: I'm fine with that. If it happens, though, the Ratbird fan butthurt will be legendary. You don't think the Bengals are going to be playing like rabid dogs trying to make the playoffs?

This. Go Bungles!

And please rest Ben today. Charlie Batch has this shiat covered.

DamnYankees: No Rodgers today. Lame.

It is fine with me. There is no reason to put him out against that piece of shiat Suh who probably has a chip on his shoulder.

/Looks like Rodgers broke the QBR record.
//Go Flynn

My New Year's Resolution is to stop picking the wrong teams to win. Disclaimer: I just woke up and I'm as hung over as some guy who drank too much last night. Yeah, that's about all you can expect this week...winners in bold:

Detroit Lions at Green Bay Packers:
I know the Packers technically have nothing to play for in this one, while Detroit would really like to lock up the #5 seed and the resulting ability to play either the Cowboys or Giants next week. But, Green Bay does have both a perfect home season and a perfect division record to motivate them today, and with many of the starters likely resting this provides backups an opportunity to showcase their talents. That, and I just don't trust the Lions.

Tennessee Titans at Houston Texans:
If all the planets align and Tennessee somehow does sneak into the playoffs, this will be a preview of their wild card round game. Houston, meanwhile, truly does have nothing to play for this week, and many of their starters are already "resting" on the IR.

Indianapolis Colts at Jacksonville Jaguars:
Dan Orlovsky has never lost a game immediately after a win during his 7-year NFL career. Yeah! Seriously, though, leave it to the Colts to screw up their virtual lock on the #1 draft pick by winning this one.

New York Jets at Miami Dolphins:
I've given up on figuring out the Jets this season, so instead I'm going with reverse psychology--I expect them to lose this one, so I'll pick them to win instead. Next step: profit.

Chicago Bears at Minnesota Vikings:
The Joe Webb era has begun. Seriously, though, the Bears still have no offense.

Buffalo Bills at New England Patriots:
The Pats need the win to lock up the #1 playoff seed, and to avoid being swept by the Bills for the first time since I'm too lazy to look it up. That's enough for me.

Carolina Panthers at New Orleans Saints:
New Orleans' motivation is that they can wrap up a first-round bye if St. Louis can...pffft, hahahaha. Sorry, couldn't keep a straight face long enough. But yeah, the Panthers D hasn't been able to stop anyone this season, I don't see how they stop the Saints.

Washington Redskins at Philadelphia Eagles:
Weird stat of the week: both the Redskins and Eagles have better records on the road than at home. So of course I'm going to throw that out the window and go with the home team here.

San Francisco 49ers at St. Louis Rams:
The Rams have been outscored by 207 points so far. What's another 20 or so?

Seattle Seahawks at Arizona Cardinals:
It's the .500 bowl--the winner gets to finish the season at 8-8. Despite the Cards having a much better record at home vs. away (better than Seattle's home record, for that matter), the Seahawks are simply a more talented team.

Tampa Bay Buccaneers at Atlanta Falcons:
If the Lions manage a victory in their 1 o'clock game, this one actually gets more interesting as Atlanta loses any motivation to win. That being said, I expect the Lions to lose, and even more than that, it's the Bucs.

Baltimore Ravens at Cincinnati Bengals:
The Ravens need a win to lock up the division and a first-round bye, while the Bengals clinch the #6 seed with a win. I expect Cincinnati to give it everything they've got, but Baltimore is just too good.

Pittsburgh Steelers at Cleveland Browns:
Rumor is that Ben Roethlisberger wants to play in this one, and Pittsburgh can still win the AFC North with a victory here plus a Ravens loss. Regardless of who's under center for the Steelers, though, I still expect them to come away with a win against the Browns.

Kansas City Chiefs at Denver Broncos:
Call me a sucker, but I think there's just enough Tebow magic left in the tank for one last victory this season. The win earns Denver the privilege of losing to either Baltimore or Pittsburgh next week in the playoffs.

San Diego Chargers at Oakland Raiders:
Second weird stat of the day: San Diego is the only team in the AFC West with a positive point differential for the season. As for the Raiders, every time I see them play I'm more amazed that they're 8-7.

Dallas Cowboys at New York Giants:
I seriously considered picking this one as a tie, under my theory that NFC East teams will do whatever is possible to muddle things in the divisional standings, but finally went with the Cowboys on the principle that the Giants have too much talent on offense to lose. Got that?

Also, I just wanted to take the time to thank those of you who have actually been reading these tl;dr posts over the last half of the season. They're fun for me to do, which is really the only reason I've done them. Good luck to those of you with teams still in the race, and good draft to the rest of you!

Adolf Oliver Nipples: The Patsies don't do well at Buffalo, either.

It's in New England.

Adolf Oliver Nipples: Ratbirds- #2 seed with a win. #5 with a loss and a Steelers win at Cleveland. #1 seed with a win and New England loss vs. Buffalo.

Figures that someone who can't spell "Ravens" wouldn't be able to keep track of all the playoff implications. :p

Woohoo! Not mathematically eliminated yet!

Harv72b: Also, I just wanted to take the time to thank those of you who have actually been reading these tl;dr posts over the last half of the season.

No wall of text, no blathering. Not tl.

Thank you for your comments.

Happy New Year

Here's hoping to three 80 yard rushing touchdowns on New Orleans first three drives. Sit Drew Brees before he throws for another yard.

Sabyen91: /Looks like Rodgers broke the QBR record.



Classless! Cheap! Phony! Asterisk!

The Giants have too many people picking them to win. Since they are the most contrarian team in the NFL they are doomed.

robsul82: Sabyen91: /Looks like Rodgers broke the QBR record.

[www.swing-smarter-baseball-hitting-drills.com image 297x298]

Classless! Cheap! Phony! Asterisk!

Coaches decision doesn't count.

Evil Canadian: Sabyen91: DamnYankees: No Rodgers today. Lame.

It is fine with me. There is no reason to put him out against that piece of shiat Suh who probably has a chip on his shoulder.

/Looks like Rodgers broke the QBR record.
//Go Flynn

Against the Lions - sit the guy! Not that I hate Flynn enough to wish him injured, but given the injury state of the Packers O Line, yes, keep Rodgers safe. My only worry is that 2 weeks off might bring rusty play early in the 1st playoff game.

Flynn can get a game to showcase his abilities for potential suitors as well.

Adolf Oliver Nipples: Big week for the AFC North.

Pittsburgh- #5 seed guaranteed at the minimum. #2 seed if the Ravens lose to the Bengals in Cincinnati. #1 seed if they win, the Ravens lose and the Patriots lose in Buffalo.

Ratbirds- #2 seed with a win. #5 with a loss and a Steelers win at Cleveland.

Bengals- #6 seed with a win, or with a loss and a whole truckload of help that they won't get.

The Bengals are going to play hard before a sellout crowd with the playoffs at stake, and the Ravens don't do well at Paul Brown Stadium. The Patsies don't do well at Buffalo, either. The Steelers have a very real shot at the #1 and #2 seeds.

[images.paraorkut.com image 398x504]

I'm hopeful, but I'm also worried that they'll still get the #5 seed and Ben will be injured today, making it all for naught.

Sabyen91: robsul82: Sabyen91: /Looks like Rodgers broke the QBR record.

[www.swing-smarter-baseball-hitting-drills.com image 297x298]

Classless! Cheap! Phony! Asterisk!

Coaches decision doesn't count.

"If I'm going to be a .400 hitter, then I'm going to be a .400 hitter all the way." Good thing Teddy Ballgame didn't give a shiat about coaches' decisions, lol.

/sorry, got a flash of ESPN's reaction if the shoe was on the other foot

robsul82: Sabyen91: robsul82: Sabyen91: /Looks like Rodgers broke the QBR record.

[www.swing-smarter-baseball-hitting-drills.com image 297x298]

Classless! Cheap! Phony! Asterisk!

Coaches decision doesn't count.

"If I'm going to be a .400 hitter, then I'm going to be a .400 hitter all the way." Good thing Teddy Ballgame didn't give a shiat about coaches' decisions, lol.

/sorry, got a flash of ESPN's reaction if the shoe was on the other foot

Meh, Rodgers has more pass attempts than Manning did when he set the record. I am betting Rodgers is not going to be happy sitting on the sidelines. He certainly isn't sitting for a record.

Zoomaster: GO PACK GO

/worked night shift, just got out of bed and did the snow shoveling. Is Rodgers sitting for sure?

Yeah, he is inactive.

Zoomaster: GO PACK GO

/worked night shift, just got out of bed and did the snow shoveling. Is Rodgers sitting for sure?

The ESPN sidebar thing said he was inactive.

UNC_Samurai: Zoomaster: GO PACK GO

/worked night shift, just got out of bed and did the snow shoveling. Is Rodgers sitting for sure?

Rogers is sitting, along with almost all of Houston's skill players.

But we totally need two more regular season games.

/fark you, owners

Then we can have even more diluted playoffs with a couple of extra games of injuries. Win-win!

/Greedy fricking owners.

Sabyen91: Meh, Rodgers has more pass attempts than Manning did when he set the record. I am betting Rodgers is not going to be happy sitting on the sidelines. He certainly isn't sitting for a record.

Oh, I'll hold my breath waiting for someone to point that out, lol. In any case, thankfully they were busy coronating Peyton in '09 and preferred to just ignore Brees doing it for the completion percentage record, heh.

Sabyen91: Then we can have even more diluted playoffs with a couple of extra games of injuries. Win-win!

/Greedy fricking owners.

You don't want a month of people sitting and more injuries?!?

Lt. Cheese Weasel: Rivers or Eli?

Eli shat all over me two weeks ago and killed another Fox team I had in the playoffs, but this is big, none bigger. Gints have played like shiat at home. Every stat, every indicator says Dallas gets walloped, which is why I think they win.

When choosing between two guys with epic tardfaces, ask yourself, which tardface has looked 'tarded in the face of victory more often?

/Eli
//of course, I don't do fantasy football, but

robsul82: Sabyen91: Meh, Rodgers has more pass attempts than Manning did when he set the record. I am betting Rodgers is not going to be happy sitting on the sidelines. He certainly isn't sitting for a record.

Oh, I'll hold my breath waiting for someone to point that out, lol. In any case, thankfully they were busy coronating Peyton in '09 and preferred to just ignore Brees doing it for the completion percentage record, heh.

Yeah, Brees wanted to play that game as well like all good competitors.

robsul82: Sabyen91: Then we can have even more diluted playoffs with a couple of extra games of injuries. Win-win!

/Greedy fricking owners.

You don't want a month of people sitting and more injuries?!?

I want to see a 30 game season! Of course we will need to expand rosters to 100 but that is just fine.