FARK.com: (6849361) WWE upset with Michael Cole's commentary, asks him to SHUT THE FARKING FARK UP

If you can read this, either the style sheet didn't load or you have an older browser that doesn't support style sheets. Try clearing your browser cache and refreshing the page.

		WWE upset with Michael Cole's commentary, asks him to SHUT THE FARKING FARK UP (bleacherreport.com)		163
		More: Hero, WWE, Jerry Lawler, CM Punk, main event, Daniel Bryan, Vince McMahon, heavyweight champion

• • •

3803 clicks; posted to Sports » on 29 Dec 2011 at 4:03 AM | Favorite | share:

more» |

Get this fabulous T-Shirt and impress the methane out of your friends!

shirt it!

Share this link:

URL:

http://fk.cm/go/6849361

Bookmark:

Article Comments close

163 Comments (+0 »)

View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest

First | « | 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | » | Last | Show all

ManateeGag

2011-12-28 09:42:11 PM

thank god!

Blues_X

2011-12-28 11:24:09 PM

It's all fake, you dumbasses.

FirstNationalBastard

2011-12-28 11:52:19 PM

Blues_X: It's all fake, you dumbasses.

Mike_LowELL

2011-12-28 11:58:37 PM

Blues_X: It's all fake, you dumbasses.

KELLY KELLY KELLY KELLY KELLY KELLY KELLY KELLY KELLY KELLY KELLY KELLY KELLY KELLY KELLY KELLY KELLY KELLY KELLY KELLY KELLY KELLY KELLY KELLY KELLY KELLY KELLY KELLY KELLY KELLY KELLY KELLY KELLY KELLY KELLY KELLY KELLY KELLY KELLY KELLY KELLY KELLY KELLY KELLY KELLY KELLY KELLY KELLY KELLY KELLY KELLY KELLY KELLY KELLY KELLY KELLY KELLY KELLY KELLY KELLY KELLY KELLY KELLY KELLY KELLY KELLY KELLY KELLY KELLY KELLY KELLY KELLY KELLY KELLY KELLY KELLY KELLY KELLY KELLY KELLY KELLY KELLY KELLY KELLY KELLY KELLY KELLY KELLY KELLY KELLY KELLY KELLY KELLY KELLY KELLY KELLY KELLY KELLY KELLY KELLY KELLY KELLY KELLY KELLY KELLY KELLY KELLY KELLY KELLY KELLY KELLY KELLY KELLY KELLY KELLY KELLY KELLY KELLY KELLY KELLY KELLY KELLY KELLY KELLY KELLY KELLY KELLY KELLY KELLY KELLY KELLY KELLY KELLY KELLY KELLY KELLY KELLY KELLY KELLY KELLY KELLY KELLY KELLY KELLY KELLY KELLY KELLY KELLY KELLY KELLY KELLY KELLY KELLY KELLY KELLY KELLY KELLY KELLY KELLY KELLY KELLY KELLY KELLY KELLY KELLY KELLY KELLY KELLY KELLY KELLY KELLY KELLY KELLY KELLY KELLY KELLY KELLY KELLY KELLY KELLY KELLY KELLY KELLY KELLY KELLY KELLY KELLY KELLY KELLY KELLY KELLY KELLY KELLY KELLY KELLY KELLY KELLY KELLY KELLY KELLY KELLY KELLY KELLY KELLY KELLY KELLY KELLY KELLY KELLY KELLY KELLY KELLY KELLY KELLY KELLY KELLY KELLY KELLY KELLY KELLY KELLY KELLY KELLY KELLY KELLY KELLY KELLY KELLY

Confabulat

2011-12-29 12:01:44 AM

I have never understood pro wrestling.

FirstNationalBastard

2011-12-29 12:04:57 AM

Confabulat: I have never understood pro wrestling.

You read comic books?

Think of it as live action comic books. Overly muscled men and surgically enhanced women, all dressed in spandex, fight each other for ill-defined reasons. There's always a good guy vs. a bad guy, a bunch of catchphrases are thrown around, and they try to send you home happy at the end of the story so you come back for the next fix.

Confabulat

2011-12-29 12:42:31 AM

FirstNationalBastard: Confabulat: I have never understood pro wrestling.

You read comic books?

Think of it as live action comic books. Overly muscled men and surgically enhanced women, all dressed in spandex, fight each other for ill-defined reasons. There's always a good guy vs. a bad guy, a bunch of catchphrases are thrown around, and they try to send you home happy at the end of the story so you come back for the next fix.

Yeah but I understand comic books.

ArkAngel

2011-12-29 12:50:15 AM

Confabulat: FirstNationalBastard: Confabulat: I have never understood pro wrestling.

You read comic books?

Think of it as live action comic books. Overly muscled men and surgically enhanced women, all dressed in spandex, fight each other for ill-defined reasons. There's always a good guy vs. a bad guy, a bunch of catchphrases are thrown around, and they try to send you home happy at the end of the story so you come back for the next fix.

Yeah but I understand comic books.

Ok, you're a guy...

Think of it as a soap opera with muscles

McManus_brothers

2011-12-29 04:15:36 AM

I haven't watched wrestling in about 15 years (since I was 10 or so), so I've never heard Cole's commentary, but from the article he basically sounds like Bobby Heenan without the likeability.

TheBaldOneMpls

2011-12-29 04:16:16 AM

I don't have any issues with Cole's character; I have issues with Cole's character in the role that it's in. He does a phenomenal job being the guy you just want to slap some sense into and shut him up, but why the hell would you make that character the head commentator? That role is not just a commentator, but a narrator. That's the person who's supposed to guide the viewer through what's going on, and to have him bury the people we're supposed to emotionally invest in seems so ass-backwards to me. When DBD won the title, the reaction of the 'Voice of the WWE' to a young guy winning (one of) the company's most prestigious title(s) for the first time was... silence. Perfect for the Cole character, but horrible in making that moment matter to fans.

ferro_man

2011-12-29 04:31:42 AM

IT's about damn time

FirstNationalBastard

2011-12-29 04:35:50 AM

TheBaldOneMpls: I don't have any issues with Cole's character; I have issues with Cole's character in the role that it's in. He does a phenomenal job being the guy you just want to slap some sense into and shut him up, but why the hell would you make that character the head commentator? That role is not just a commentator, but a narrator. That's the person who's supposed to guide the viewer through what's going on, and to have him bury the people we're supposed to emotionally invest in seems so ass-backwards to me. When DBD won the title, the reaction of the 'Voice of the WWE' to a young guy winning (one of) the company's most prestigious title(s) for the first time was... silence. Perfect for the Cole character, but horrible in making that moment matter to fans.

Well, the problem is, Vince and Creative, in their infinite *ahem* wisdom, have decided that the day of the play-by-play announcer in the vein of Gordon Solie, Gorilla Monsoon, and Jim Ross is over, and that announcers should be there to comment on everything but what is actually going on in the ring. So, that all-knowing voice of wisdom that walks you through the match is now gone, replaced by a couple of braying jackasses more interested in getting themselves over than doing the correct job of getting the product over.

The correct formula should be a P-B-P Announcer, and a color guy. Cole could be a good color guy. But he shouldn't be the lead announcer. That formula worked for decades, and it still can. But, it requires a bit of thought, much more than Vince instructing Cole to make a joke about JR's Bell's Palsy, or how Lillian Garcia has a horseface.

KellyKellyKelly

2011-12-29 05:16:20 AM

McManus_brothers: I haven't watched wrestling in about 15 years (since I was 10 or so), so I've never heard Cole's commentary, but from the article he basically sounds like Bobby Heenan without the likeability.

Add in the lack of a Gorilla Monsoon to play the competent straight man, and you've nailed it.

sephjnr

2011-12-29 05:28:37 AM

FirstNationalBastard: TheBaldOneMpls: I don't have any issues with Cole's character; I have issues with Cole's character in the role that it's in. He does a phenomenal job being the guy you just want to slap some sense into and shut him up, but why the hell would you make that character the head commentator? That role is not just a commentator, but a narrator. That's the person who's supposed to guide the viewer through what's going on, and to have him bury the people we're supposed to emotionally invest in seems so ass-backwards to me. When DBD won the title, the reaction of the 'Voice of the WWE' to a young guy winning (one of) the company's most prestigious title(s) for the first time was... silence. Perfect for the Cole character, but horrible in making that moment matter to fans.

Well, the problem is, Vince and Creative, in their infinite *ahem* wisdom, have decided that the day of the play-by-play announcer in the vein of Gordon Solie, Gorilla Monsoon, and Jim Ross is over, and that announcers should be there to comment on everything but what is actually going on in the ring. So, that all-knowing voice of wisdom that walks you through the match is now gone, replaced by a couple of braying jackasses more interested in getting themselves over than doing the correct job of getting the product over.

The correct formula should be a P-B-P Announcer, and a color guy. Cole could be a good color guy. But he shouldn't be the lead announcer. That formula worked for decades, and it still can. But, it requires a bit of thought, much more than Vince instructing Cole to make a joke about JR's Bell's Palsy, or how Lillian Garcia has a horseface.

Book is suitable for neither role- his farkups and witterings are far too frequent. Either promote him to full-time and give Cody a decent programme or put him on a Legends contract. That there really is nobody really suitable for proper PBP is hurting; even the B-show hosts who would be perfect without any 'personality' needing to come out know exactly nada about calling a match, and would have to work two hours with Vince in their ears. It's at the point where Punk - who did a very decent job behind the desk and is light years ahead of that now - needs to come back to show exactly what the problems are. Hopefully by throwing the headphones down on-screen.

I'll settle for Daniel Bryan calling a Cole match as if it were Bret/Shawn at WM12.

flamingboar

2011-12-29 05:31:56 AM

I would catch a few minutes of Raw here and there to see what the characters were up to, but I had to mute it because Cole's voice gave me a headache. He never takes a break from the constant stream of noise from his mouth.

BTW is Kane still wrestling?

FirstNationalBastard

2011-12-29 05:35:38 AM

flamingboar: I would catch a few minutes of Raw here and there to see what the characters were up to, but I had to mute it because Cole's voice gave me a headache. He never takes a break from the constant stream of noise from his mouth.

BTW is Kane still wrestling?

Yep.

He just came back, wearing his old mask, and instructing John Cena to GIVE INTO HATE, DON'T FALL INTO THE TRAP OF THINKING THAT MINIMUM WAGE IS A GOOD THING, BECAUSE ALL IT DOES IS MAKE SURE THAT FEWER PEOPLE CAN AFFORD TO BE HIRED

Captain Steroid

2011-12-29 05:41:35 AM

This matter will not be considered resolved until Michael Cole is fired.

... out of a cannon. >:-)

Dogfacedgod

2011-12-29 06:32:27 AM

I miss The Brain and Gorilla

Dr J Zoidberg

2011-12-29 06:48:38 AM

Just fire Cole FFS and make the WWE fans happy

timswar

2011-12-29 07:19:23 AM

I'm amazed Cole still has a job with the WWE. He was TERRIBLE For years after being hired. His commentating kinda ruined Heat (well, that and Heat being a D- show in the C show slot).

Yes, I was hating him before it was cool, now excuse me while I put in my Bubba Dudley glasses and Cactus Jack shirt.

IlGreven

2011-12-29 07:47:01 AM

Blues_X: It's all fake, you dumbasses.

So's NCIS. Yet you don't see anyone yelling at their fans "EVERYTHING GIBBS DOES IS SCRIPTED!"

pkellmey

2011-12-29 08:00:34 AM

IlGreven: Blues_X: It's all fake, you dumbasses.

So's NCIS. Yet you don't see anyone yelling at their fans "EVERYTHING GIBBS DOES IS SCRIPTED!"

Pretty much this. This last time I went to see a broadway play, it looked like the people were acting and what they saying was scripted for them ahead of time.

steamingpile

2011-12-29 08:16:48 AM

Yes its the commentators fault, not the fact the wwe has put a shiat product on the air since the late 90s-early 2000s, right? Even the steroid freaks I go to the gym with quit watching because the guys wrestling aren't entertaining and have zero personality.

But yes, the announcers are to blame, not the boring actors.

buckeyebrain

2011-12-29 08:39:03 AM

Dogfacedgod: I miss The Brain and Gorilla

Tito Santana is like a cue ball. The more you strike him, the more English you get out of him.

Drazzhar

2011-12-29 08:39:57 AM

Cole is annoying as hell. I really wish they would let J.R. and King do the commentary, and let Cole do back stage stuff where he can be as disparaging and annoying as he wants.

Only relief i get after RAW is to load up WWE 12 and play a hardcore match and beat Cole mercilessly with chairs over and over again.

silgryphon

2011-12-29 08:46:06 AM

Wow Dougie your sign worked. Good Job

KellyKellyKelly

2011-12-29 09:19:17 AM

steamingpile: Yes its the commentators fault, not the fact the wwe has put a shiat product on the air since the late 90s-early 2000s, right? Even the steroid freaks I go to the gym with quit watching because the guys wrestling aren't entertaining and have zero personality.

But yes, the announcers are to blame, not the boring actors.

In this case, yes, the announcer (or rather, the people feeding him his cues) IS to blame. Why watch a product when the commentator himself is telling you how much it sucks?

And as for zero personality, Mssrs. Punk, Ryder, and Truth would like a word...

Dougie AXP

2011-12-29 09:38:10 AM

You are all welcome.

Note my sign just to the right of Punk:

i.imgur.com

bhcompy

2011-12-29 09:41:23 AM

I just think it's funny that a journalist that covered presidential campaigns, wars, domestic terrorism, FBI sieges, etc has made a career of playing a douche on a wrestling show.

hobblekitty

2011-12-29 09:42:35 AM

silgryphon: Wow Dougie your sign worked. Good Job

Seriously! Well done Dougie, you are an agent for change.

Personally, I think anyone that lets Cole's opinion color their own is a fool anyway, but with that being said I'm all like "YAY, shut up Cole!!" right now.

Poor Pizilla. He is going to have to work doubly hard now to get his heel heat going. ;-)

Tiberius Gracchus

2011-12-29 09:49:05 AM

Pump_ThePurpleWarrior

2011-12-29 10:01:58 AM

buckeyebrain: Dogfacedgod: I miss The Brain and Gorilla

Tito Santana is like a cue ball. The more you strike him, the more English you get out of him.

Will you stop!

Dougie AXP

2011-12-29 10:04:10 AM

Pump_ThePurpleWarrior: buckeyebrain: Dogfacedgod: I miss The Brain and Gorilla

Tito Santana is like a cue ball. The more you strike him, the more English you get out of him.

Will you stop!

I internet

Dougie AXP

2011-12-29 10:04:53 AM

Dougie AXP: Pump_ThePurpleWarrior: buckeyebrain: Dogfacedgod: I miss The Brain and Gorilla

Tito Santana is like a cue ball. The more you strike him, the more English you get out of him.

Will you stop!

I internet

wow. Typing fail. apparently Fark doesn't like things. Let me try again:

I internet-love you two

LesserEvil

2011-12-29 10:24:52 AM

Lith

2011-12-29 10:32:48 AM

Hero tag, really? REALLY?

Dougie AXP

2011-12-29 10:37:48 AM

Lith: Hero tag, really? REALLY?

RILEY!

Gunny Highway

2011-12-29 10:43:38 AM

Matt Striker and Scott Stanford should be on the announce table. That or get Edge to come back and work with Striker.

Cole should be a manager. His heel shtick would work for 15 minutes a night. It sucks when it is forced down the viewers throats for 2+ hours.

Precious Roy's Horse Dividers

2011-12-29 10:46:24 AM

Dougie AXP: Lith: Hero tag, really? REALLY?

RILEY!

JIMMY!

CommiePuddin

2011-12-29 10:52:59 AM

Dougie AXP: You are all welcome.

Note my sign just to the right of Punk:

[i.imgur.com image 624x352]

How long until you put the MS Paint "IT'S ME!" arrows on it? :)

hobblekitty

2011-12-29 10:54:17 AM

Lith: Hero tag, really? REALLY?

Yes, for whoever is responsible for shutting Cole up. They are a true hero amongst men.

Praise Cheesus

2011-12-29 10:57:09 AM

bhcompy: I just think it's funny that a journalist that covered presidential campaigns, wars, domestic terrorism, FBI sieges, etc has made a career of playing a douche on a wrestling show.

Sean Coulthard was not even that good of a reporter. In the summer of 1988, he was caught out trying to "infiltrate" a Dukakis for President office by volunteering and then reporting on how the office strategized against the Bush campaign in the area. The story went that he was filling out the paperwork to volunteer when the county Executive Secretary for the party walked into the office, looked at him and asked the receptionist "Why is a reporter from CBS in here and why wasn't I informed he was coming?"

The1andonlyZack

2011-12-29 10:57:17 AM

LesserEvil: FirstNationalBastard: Confabulat: I have never understood pro wrestling.

You read comic books?

Think of it as live action comic books. Overly muscled men and surgically enhanced women, all dressed in spandex, fight each other for ill-defined reasons. There's always a good guy vs. a bad guy, a bunch of catchphrases are thrown around, and they try to send you home happy at the end of the story so you come back for the next fix.

You forgot to mention that it's homophobic fans can indulge their inner fabulousness by slobbering over homo-erotic man-grappling and pretend their hard on is actually a result of watching those divas strut and catfight between rounds.

All ____ are ____ is always correct!

no hint of projection?

/Is aware the average intelligence of wrestling fans tends to skew on the lower end, but at the same time coloring an entire fandom all the same color always comes off as ignorant.

Precious Roy's Horse Dividers

2011-12-29 10:58:39 AM

They need to write out Cole for a bit, then have him return after a few weeks as a manager, maybe with Brodus Clay as his weapon. As for getting rid of him, have wrestler after wrestler come out to the ring and hit their finisher on him. Stunner, GTS, Tombstone, Anaconda Vice, Sweet Chin music, Luger enhanced forearm

LesserEvil

2011-12-29 11:07:25 AM

The1andonlyZack: LesserEvil: FirstNationalBastard: Confabulat: I have never understood pro wrestling.

You read comic books?

Think of it as live action comic books. Overly muscled men and surgically enhanced women, all dressed in spandex, fight each other for ill-defined reasons. There's always a good guy vs. a bad guy, a bunch of catchphrases are thrown around, and they try to send you home happy at the end of the story so you come back for the next fix.

You forgot to mention that it's homophobic fans can indulge their inner fabulousness by slobbering over homo-erotic man-grappling and pretend their hard on is actually a result of watching those divas strut and catfight between rounds.

All ____ are ____ is always correct!

no hint of projection?

/Is aware the average intelligence of wrestling fans tends to skew on the lower end, but at the same time coloring an entire fandom all the same color always comes off as ignorant.

I only mentioned the homophobic fans finding the homo-erotic man-grappling enjoyable for certain reasons.

Everybody else gets a pass. Re-read what I stated and reconsider your rush to judgment, and have a great day!

rjakobi

2011-12-29 11:27:16 AM

All this Gorilla Monsoon worship is irking me. Everyone knows he was only managable with the help of Lord Alfred Hayes.

saintstryfe

2011-12-29 11:28:48 AM

Precious Roy's Horse Dividers: They need to write out Cole for a bit, then have him return after a few weeks as a manager, maybe with Brodus Clay as his weapon. As for getting rid of him, have wrestler after wrestler come out to the ring and hit their finisher on him. Stunner, GTS, Tombstone, Anaconda Vice, Sweet Chin music, Luger enhanced forearm

For absolutely no reason, Outback Jack returns to hit the Boomerang, and somehow, Scott Hall drunke... urr... Personal Demonly.... stumbles out and does the Razor's Edge...

/enjoying thinking of wrestlers who could return just to do a finishing move on Cole...

saintstryfe

2011-12-29 11:29:25 AM

rjakobi: All this Gorilla Monsoon worship is irking me. Everyone knows he was only managable with the help of Lord Alfred Hayes.

You sound like you don't know a wristlock from a wristwatch.

Sapper_Topo

2011-12-29 11:46:04 AM

Cole has a job and this guy doesnt?

slam.canoe.ca

The world is a cruel place

buckeyebrain

2011-12-29 11:49:31 AM

saintstryfe: rjakobi: All this Gorilla Monsoon worship is irking me. Everyone knows he was only managable with the help of Lord Alfred Hayes.

You sound like you don't know a wristlock from a wristwatch.

If you don't shut up, I'm going to attack your lateral collateral ligament.

Displayed 50 of 163 comments