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(ABC)   Q: What's the difference between a pickpocket and a Peeping Tom? A: The pickpocket snatches your watch   (abcnews.go.com) divider line 112
    More: PSA  
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6837 clicks; posted to Main » on 23 Dec 2011 at 9:24 PM (2 years ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2011-12-23 06:19:53 PM
img818.imageshack.us
 
2011-12-23 06:29:59 PM
Took me a second, but it's hilarious. I put this as my FB status just now. Out yourself, subby.
 
2011-12-23 06:31:22 PM
I'm surprised people haven't heard that joke before.
 
2011-12-23 07:06:02 PM
*golfclap*
 
2011-12-23 08:00:19 PM
Great joke...now about the subject at hand, Hull, MA used to sell pickpocket licenses at the police station.
 
2011-12-23 08:25:52 PM
3.bp.blogspot.com
 
2011-12-23 08:47:48 PM
Q: What's the difference between a prostitute with diarrhea and an epileptic corn farmer?
A: One shucks between fits.
 
2011-12-23 09:27:28 PM
Very nice subby!
 
2011-12-23 09:29:10 PM
What's the difference between a nun and a woman taking a bath?

A nun has hope in her soul...
 
2011-12-23 09:30:52 PM
Well done submitter. You are indeed a shining wit.
 
2011-12-23 09:31:37 PM
Q: What's the difference between a pissed-off bear and fat-and-happy bear?

A: Claws and angry-largitude and/or sleepy fat and fuzzy coma-tude...

P.S. Most folks prefer the latter.
 
2011-12-23 09:33:11 PM

jaylectricity: Great joke...now about the subject at hand, Hull, MA used to sell pickpocket licenses at the police station.


Huh. I lived there growing up. There's a hilariously embarrassing home video of me running up and down the beach screaming.
 
2011-12-23 09:35:11 PM
What's the difference between a vitamin and a hormone?

You can't make a vitamin.

/even Johnny Carson didn't get his own joke for a few seconds, so don't feel bad
 
2011-12-23 09:35:37 PM
OK, I don't laugh often at these headlines like I did with this one. So simple, yet effective.
 
2011-12-23 09:38:53 PM
Artful dodgers? Meh, when's the last time they won a pennant?
 
2011-12-23 09:40:38 PM
What's the difference between a coyote and a flea?

One howls on the prairie...

/lame compared to the others
 
2011-12-23 09:40:47 PM

Ivo Shandor: Well done submitter. You are indeed a shining wit.


A whining sh*t?
 
2011-12-23 09:41:09 PM
i.imgur.com

Sees what you did there Submitter, and will haunt you if you don't give credit where credit is due.
 
2011-12-23 09:41:51 PM

Alleyoop: What's the difference between a vitamin and a hormone?

You can't make a vitamin.

/even Johnny Carson didn't get his own joke for a few seconds, so don't feel bad


Bam.
 
2011-12-23 09:42:51 PM
watches your snatch...*snort*
 
2011-12-23 09:43:30 PM
What's the difference between a women's track team and a band of Pygmy hunters?
Well, the latter are a bunch of cunning runts........
 
2011-12-23 09:43:38 PM
Kid (to Bob Hope) Hey Bob! Your slip is showing!

Bob - So is your father's.
 
2011-12-23 09:44:42 PM

jso2897: What's the difference between a women's track team and a band of Pygmy hunters?
Well, the latter are a bunch of cunning runts........


Awesome!

;)
 
2011-12-23 09:45:36 PM
What's better than 69?

A: 77, cause you get ate more....
 
2011-12-23 09:46:08 PM
God damn you!

/cleaning up beer from keyboard.
 
2011-12-23 09:46:19 PM

Somacandra: [i.imgur.com image 360x404]

Sees what you did there Submitter, and will haunt you if you don't give credit where credit is due.


Redd, is that you? I'm comin'. Not just yet, hang on a little while longer.
 
2011-12-23 09:47:14 PM

jso2897: What's the difference between a women's track team and a band of Pygmy hunters?
Well, the latter are a bunch of cunning runts........


Your loss for not envotinating
 
2011-12-23 09:47:25 PM
www.enduringamerica.com

What modern day pickpockets might look like.

Just a little "bump" and before you know it - you're destitute.
 
2011-12-23 09:47:36 PM
Well, that explains the restraining order.
 
2011-12-23 09:51:57 PM

History's Greatest Monster: jaylectricity: Great joke...now about the subject at hand, Hull, MA used to sell pickpocket licenses at the police station.

Huh. I lived there growing up. There's a hilariously embarrassing home video of me running up and down the beach screaming.


That's Hull for ya. When were you there? I learned of this pickpocket license from a book written by the guy who used to live in the red house that stood alone a few hundred feet from the last public bath house. William Bergin or Berghman or something like that.
 
2011-12-23 09:52:29 PM

Alleyoop: What's the difference between a vitamin and a hormone?

You can't make a vitamin.

/even Johnny Carson didn't get his own joke for a few seconds, so don't feel bad


I've got a better chance of making a vitamin.

:/
 
2011-12-23 09:53:18 PM
Where's the headline of the year contest when you really need it?
 
2011-12-23 09:53:40 PM

Show_The_O_Face: Alleyoop: What's the difference between a vitamin and a hormone?

You can't make a vitamin.

/even Johnny Carson didn't get his own joke for a few seconds, so don't feel bad

I've got a better chance of making a vitamin.

:/


Not-joke is not-funny.

;)
 
2011-12-23 09:59:23 PM
Well played subby.
 
2011-12-23 10:00:24 PM
How do they catch pickpockets while undercover? Do they have spotters or do they have to be faster and sneakier than the pickpocket? (seems unlikely)
 
2011-12-23 10:00:25 PM
Well played subby, too bad the HOL brackets are already going, you could've been a contender.


Golfs.gif
 
2011-12-23 10:00:30 PM

ecmoRandomNumbers: Took me a second, but it's hilarious. I put this as my FB status just now. Out yourself, subby.


Marcus Aurelius: Where's the headline of the year contest when you really need it?


I concede Ecmo, and thank you Marcus. This is 2 Mains in a row.
 
2011-12-23 10:00:33 PM
What's the difference between irony and coincidence?

*crickets*
 
2011-12-23 10:01:14 PM
Used to have a t-shirt that said, "I'd rather have a bottle in front of me than a frontal lobotomy".
 
2011-12-23 10:05:11 PM

W6XRL4: Used to have a t-shirt that said, "I'd rather have a bottle in front of me than a frontal lobotomy".


I used to remember that joke...
 
2011-12-23 10:11:05 PM
There was a great article in Slate earlier this year about how pickpocketing has become less common than a generation ago:

The Lost Art of Pickpocketing
 
2011-12-23 10:14:22 PM

Equilibrist: W6XRL4: Used to have a t-shirt that said, "I'd rather have a bottle in front of me than a frontal lobotomy".

I used to remember that joke...


Looking back upon it now, my day was startled by scrambled eggs and toast in the rec room
 
2011-12-23 10:15:17 PM
Well played.
 
2011-12-23 10:20:09 PM

trappedspirit: Equilibrist: W6XRL4: Used to have a t-shirt that said, "I'd rather have a bottle in front of me than a frontal lobotomy".

I used to remember that joke...

Looking back upon it now, my day was startled by scrambled eggs and toast in the rec room


How do I get the snot off my keyboard?
 
2011-12-23 10:21:25 PM

trappedspirit: Equilibrist: W6XRL4: Used to have a t-shirt that said, "I'd rather have a bottle in front of me than a frontal lobotomy".

I used to remember that joke...

Looking back upon it now, my day was startled by scrambled eggs and toast in the rec room



And jam every other day.
 
2011-12-23 10:21:32 PM
What's the difference between jelly and jam?

I can't jelly my cock into your mom's ass.
 
2011-12-23 10:23:25 PM
Hilarious.
 
2011-12-23 10:26:41 PM

Relatively Obscure: I'm surprised people haven't heard that joke before.


It's only twenty years old, give it time.
 
2011-12-23 10:28:44 PM
I suggest tans for you all.

Fear the sun, children.

It rules your worlds.

You'll see.

How can you not?

Unless you are blind, and then you will feel it only: warmth on the skin...

;)
 
2011-12-23 10:32:19 PM
What the difference between roast beef and pea soup?

Anyone can roast beef, not many can pee soup.
 
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