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(ESPN) Satire ESPN gives some suggestions for Christmas gifts, including a Tackle Me Polamalu   (espn.go.com) divider line 18
More: Satire, ESPN, Jim Caple, Arian Foster, exercise equipment, physical strength, Enter Sandman, Tim Lincecum, outdoors  
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1370 clicks; posted to Sports » on 23 Dec 2011 at 1:23 PM   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»   |    Get this fabulous T-Shirt and impress the methane out of your friends! shirt it!



18 Comments   (+0 »)
   
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest
 
Super Chronic
2011-12-23 01:33:53 PM
Okay, the Turn Ahead the Clock Replica Jerseys were pretty funny.
 
Why Would I Read the Article
2011-12-23 01:42:28 PM
Wow, Jim Caple still writes for ESPN? That is surprising. Jim Caple still sucks? That is not surprising.
 
Bunny Deville
2011-12-23 01:43:06 PM
I think that I, as well as certain other Fark Female Football Friends, would totally enjoy a Tackle Me Polamalu toy.
 
animesucks
2011-12-23 02:07:54 PM
roethlisberger rape whistle?
 
I Have The Touch of a Shocked Monkey [TotalFark]
2011-12-23 02:27:01 PM
animesucks: roethlisberger rape whistle?

Giving the gift of Delonte West to your mom...
 
UNC_Samurai
2011-12-23 03:03:19 PM
Bunny Deville: I think that I, as well as certain other Fark Female Football Friends, would totally enjoy a Tackle Me Polamalu toy.

Mrs. Samurai texted me this link with a "WAAAAAAAAAAAANNNNNNNNTTTTT!!!!1!!1"
 
Captain_Ballbeard
2011-12-23 05:33:31 PM
Does it always go for the knee?
 
MBK [TotalFark]
2011-12-23 06:03:58 PM
Captain_Ballbeard: Does it always go for the knee?

I used to be a quarterback like you...until I took a Polamalu to the knee.
 
becksellent
2011-12-23 06:36:15 PM
Bunny Deville: I think that I, as well as certain other Fark Female Football Friends, would totally enjoy a Tackle Me Polamalu toy.

Aw yeah. Where's Sarcastica when you need her? ;)

/what do you mean, I'm just as bad? :P
 
IlGreven
2011-12-23 07:36:00 PM
animesucks: roethlisberger rape whistle?

That's so last year. This year's in thing is the Jerry Sandusky No, Really, It Was Just a Shower Curtain.
 
Ryker's Peninsula
2011-12-23 08:48:12 PM
The Joe Paterno Talking Weeble Wobble.
Only it doesn't talk and does fall down.
 
jackandwater
2011-12-23 08:54:08 PM
Bunny Deville: I think that I, as well as certain other Fark Female Football Friends, would totally enjoy a Tackle Me Polamalu toy.

Most definitely yes! Also, a Clay Matthews "Sack Me Anytime Sex Doll*". I'd buy it!


*anatomically correct. ;)
 
Bunny Deville
2011-12-23 08:57:32 PM
becksellent: Bunny Deville: I think that I, as well as certain other Fark Female Football Friends, would totally enjoy a Tackle Me Polamalu toy.

Aw yeah. Where's Sarcastica when you need her? ;)

/what do you mean, I'm just as bad? :P

I'm not gonna say that you and Sarcastica were the first names to pop into my head, but you and Sarcastica were the first names to pop into my head.
 
becksellent
2011-12-23 09:21:41 PM
Bunny Deville: I'm not gonna say that you and Sarcastica were the first names to pop into my head, but you and Sarcastica were the first names to pop into my head.

Hahahahaha. :) Awesome.

jackandwater: Most definitely yes! Also, a Clay Matthews "Sack Me Anytime Sex Doll*". I'd buy it!


*anatomically correct. ;)

...I'll be in my bunk.

/a while back I had a very, very explicit dream about Matthews
//not sure where it came from, as I don't watch Packers games, but it was disappointing to wake up alone from that one, lol.
 
jackandwater
2011-12-23 09:29:45 PM
becksellent: Bunny Deville: I'm not gonna say that you and Sarcastica were the first names to pop into my head, but you and Sarcastica were the first names to pop into my head.

Hahahahaha. :) Awesome.

jackandwater: Most definitely yes! Also, a Clay Matthews "Sack Me Anytime Sex Doll*". I'd buy it!


*anatomically correct. ;)

...I'll be in my bunk.

/a while back I had a very, very explicit dream about Matthews
//not sure where it came from, as I don't watch Packers games, but it was disappointing to wake up alone from that one, lol.

Doesn't every female who watches football have explicit dreams about Matthews?

/Steelers fan, plenty of hot (imho) guys on the team, but I am greatly aroused by Matthews. What would a shrink make of that?
 
becksellent
2011-12-23 09:39:21 PM
jackandwater: /Steelers fan, plenty of hot (imho) guys on the team, but I am greatly aroused by Matthews. What would a shrink make of that?

Exactly the same situation here! :) I told one of my friends that I was greatly conflicted re: the Packers because of them beating my guys in the SB, and that I had come to the conclusion that the only way to resolve this conflict was to ragefark Aaron Rodgers and/or Clay Matthews. ;) My friend, who is a gay male and whose mom is a huge Packers fan, agreed that this would be an acceptable solution, provided I would "share." :P

/any shrink I saw would probably have to charge extra to deal with the weird shiat my mind produces, lol
 
The Bestest
2011-12-23 10:07:50 PM
..the hell did THIS thread turn into?
 
The Gentleman Caller
2011-12-24 07:50:42 AM
jackandwater: becksellent: Bunny Deville: I'm not gonna say that you and Sarcastica were the first names to pop into my head, but you and Sarcastica were the first names to pop into my head.

Hahahahaha. :) Awesome.

jackandwater: Most definitely yes! Also, a Clay Matthews "Sack Me Anytime Sex Doll*". I'd buy it!


*anatomically correct. ;)

...I'll be in my bunk.

/a while back I had a very, very explicit dream about Matthews
//not sure where it came from, as I don't watch Packers games, but it was disappointing to wake up alone from that one, lol.

Doesn't every female who watches football have explicit dreams about Matthews?

/Steelers fan, plenty of hot (imho) guys on the team, but I am greatly aroused by Matthews. What would a shrink make of that?

You probably saw the fathead commercial.

/don't say it
//just don't
 
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