FARK.com: (6840052) CNN dares ask the question: Just how do atheists celebrate Christmas? Ironically, of course?

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		CNN dares ask the question: Just how do atheists celebrate Christmas? Ironically, of course? (cnn.com)		560
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560 Comments (+0 »)

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Hobodeluxe

2011-12-22 10:46:21 PM

Just like everyone else. We exchange presents. Eat too much and fight off a nap while trying to watch football.

kronicfeld

2011-12-22 10:48:16 PM

Presents, booze, football, political arguments with family members, and after all that is done, passing out around 11 a.m.

ecmoRandomNumbers

2011-12-22 10:51:38 PM

Presents, food, more food, putting up with the family, National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation, playing in the snow.

God, I hope my sister brings her pain medication again this year. Last Christmas was so... tolerable.

Gecko Gingrich

2011-12-22 11:06:05 PM

Virgin sacrifice, fire AK into the air, roast leg of lamb, dial random phone numbers and wish the person who answers, "Happy Holidays".

PC LOAD LETTER

2011-12-22 11:17:46 PM

Apart from going to Church and singing about Jesus, the same as Christians. Considering how few Christians give a fark about Christ during Christmas, I would say identically.

FlashHarry

2011-12-22 11:24:49 PM

i'm an atheist. my wife and i are traveling to spend christmas with my family. we'll cook a turkey and exchange presents. it will be great fun.

shocking?

ThunderPelvis

2011-12-22 11:31:20 PM

More beer and fornication, less Jesus. Otherwise, it's about the same.

Bucky Katt

2011-12-22 11:43:55 PM

Confabulat

2011-12-23 12:00:51 AM

The same as Christians without all the false piety, so better.

Godscrack

2011-12-23 12:13:20 AM

Well it's Sunday so, clean the house. Do laundry. Order a pizza.

Pick up a few homeless men for an afternoon orgy.

ecmoRandomNumbers

2011-12-23 12:22:12 AM

Godscrack: Well it's Sunday so, clean the house. Do laundry. Order a pizza.

Pick up a few homeless men for an afternoon orgy.

I need to get myself down to Tucson soon.

DblDad

2011-12-23 12:38:59 AM

Tim Minchin seems appropriate here.

jsnbase

2011-12-23 12:39:32 AM

ecmoRandomNumbers: Godscrack: Well it's Sunday so, clean the house. Do laundry. Order a pizza.

Pick up a few homeless men for an afternoon orgy.

I need to get myself down to Tucson soon.

I hear that. I'm stuck in Goodyear.

Ed Finnerty

2011-12-23 12:45:52 AM

At my house, we burn a pile of babies and kittens and chant praises to the Lord Athieismo.

abb3w

2011-12-23 01:00:29 AM

Ed Finnerty: At my house, we burn a pile of babies and kittens and chant praises to the Lord Athieismo.

www.smbc-comics.com

violentsalvation

2011-12-23 01:14:29 AM

Are you really atheists or just agnostics who hate religion?

teto85

2011-12-23 01:25:26 AM

Watch the game, eat and drink too much, sleep in the Comfy Chair with the kittehs, exchange presents and otherwise have a great time. And this year my cousin and her wife are coming to visit and they are bringing homemade apricot brandy. MMMMMMMM.

violentsalvation

2011-12-23 01:29:35 AM

GAT_00: violentsalvation: Are you really atheists or just agnostics who hate religion?

I'm an atheist who hates religion, and I'm celebrating Christmas on Sunday.

And you probably will celebrate it better and more meaningful than most Christians (myself included).

But sometimes I wonder if most atheists are not just agnostics who hate religion. Atheism and denying the possibility of something without disproving it seems as closed minded as the faith I was born into. It seems to me a true atheist would be "until science proves otherwise", and that would be agnosticism, right? Saying "no no there is nothing I can't prove it but I know it" almost makes that a religion, doesn't it?

I am not looking for a fight or even a serious argument, just conversation. I am drunk, yeah.

Confabulat

2011-12-23 01:39:35 AM

violentsalvation: Are you really atheists or just agnostics who hate religion?

I'm pretty sure I'm an atheist as I have never believed in God, at least since I was old enough not to believe in Santa. That doesn't mean I don't have a spiritual side. I definitely have not and will never believe in the Christian God, as it's ridiculous, but sure there are many aspects to existence that are not easily explained. It's a no-brainer to feel a connection to the larger universe we exist in.

Religion, though, that's the fossilized man-made remnants of spirituality. The leftovers. The part where men tried to recreate real spirituality with rules and made-up tales. At some point, religious people lost spirituality altogether in favor of bureaucracy.

Confabulat

2011-12-23 01:40:31 AM

violentsalvation: Atheism and denying the possibility of something without disproving it seems as closed minded as the faith I was born into

My cats are atheists. Are they denying the possibility of something, or are they just getting busy living without worrying about it? Why is that required for you?

CanisNoir

2011-12-23 01:42:55 AM

In before the "Religions hate Education" people show up...

So highly did the Church come to value education that in 1179 Pope Alexander III decreed that each cathedral should maintain a schoolmaster to teach its clerks and other poor scholars for nothing. Pope Innocent III elaborated on this decree in the 1215 Lateran Council, and diocesan statutes, such as those of Salisbury in 1219, show that his instructions were followed. "When I was a boy," wrote Alexander of Canon's Ashby around 1200, :the ambition of nearly all teachers was to get rich by teaching, but now, by the grace of God, there are many who teach for free."
Before 1066 virtually no Englishman went abroad to study. But that all changed after the Norman Conquest, partly because for two or three generations England's elites considered themselves French and it seemed natural to send the sons and nephews for whom they planned a clerical career, to France. By the second quarter of the Twelfth Century, Paris had become the acknowledged powerhouse of the Christian West, preeminent among a number of prestigious schools in northern France at Laon, Tours, Poitiers, Orleans and Chartres. Here the over-fifteens studied what was known as the arts course. This meant what were called the "seven liberal arts," consisting of trivium (grammar, rhetoric and logic) and the quadrivium (arithmetic, astronomy, geometry and music).^*

So, have a merry Christmas and try not to have too big of a flame war here.

_{*Citation: 1215 The Year of Magna Carta by Danny Danziger}

violentsalvation

2011-12-23 01:43:07 AM

Confabulat: At some point, religious people lost spirituality altogether in favor of bureaucracy.

agreed.

Confabulat: My cats are atheists. Are they denying the possibility of something, or are they just getting busy living without worrying about it? Why is that required for you?

Well I don't know, I am not a cat.

ecmoRandomNumbers

2011-12-23 01:44:13 AM

violentsalvation: Are you really atheists or just agnostics who hate religion?

*shrugs shoulders*

Confabulat

2011-12-23 01:47:51 AM

ecmoRandomNumbers: violentsalvation: Are you really atheists or just agnostics who hate religion?

*shrugs shoulders*

Heh, that's funny. Why do religious people need to pin everyone who doesn't believe their fairy tales into specific groups?

Just because we didn't join your group, doesn't make us a member of another.

violentsalvation

2011-12-23 01:48:06 AM

ecmoRandomNumbers: violentsalvation: Are you really atheists or just agnostics who hate religion?

*shrugs shoulders*

Heh. perfect. :)

ecmoRandomNumbers

2011-12-23 01:48:39 AM

violentsalvation: Saying "no no there is nothing I can't prove it but I know it" almost makes that a religion, doesn't it?

I don't think so. I think you can say, "I don't believe," and just leave it there. Religion is an assertion of something existing and being true. Not believing in god because there is no evidence doesn't exactly connote, "and nothing you can say will change my mind, NYAAAH!" That's a projection that a lot of religious people make.

Confabulat

2011-12-23 01:50:05 AM

violentsalvation: Well I don't know, I am not a cat.

So you can't imagine life without thinking about a God? Really?

CanisNoir

2011-12-23 01:50:49 AM

Confabulat: Heh, that's funny. Why do religious people need to pin everyone who doesn't believe their fairy tales into specific groups?

And why do you see the need to use inflammatory and derogatory language?

violentsalvation

2011-12-23 01:51:12 AM

Confabulat: ecmoRandomNumbers: violentsalvation: Are you really atheists or just agnostics who hate religion?

*shrugs shoulders*

Heh, that's funny. Why do religious people need to pin everyone who doesn't believe their fairy tales into specific groups?

Just because we didn't join your group, doesn't make us a member of another.

Are there branches of atheism I don't know about? I promise you I am not trying to pin anyone anywhere. I am just curious.

Confabulat

2011-12-23 01:52:51 AM

I don't believe in alien visitation with UFOs. I don't believe in Bigfoot. I don't believe in ghosts or psychics. I don't believe in fairies or gnomes or magical wizard men who live in towers in the colder climes.

Not believing in those things does not get me labeled as anything other than "sane."

I don't believe in God.

OMG YOU ATHEIST YOU ARE SO SURE OF YOURSELF AND EVERYTHING

Confabulat

2011-12-23 01:54:15 AM

CanisNoir: Confabulat: Heh, that's funny. Why do religious people need to pin everyone who doesn't believe their fairy tales into specific groups?

And why do you see the need to use inflammatory and derogatory language?

It's called "descriptive language." You worship an old book full of tall tales about magic. What else can it be referred as.

ecmoRandomNumbers

2011-12-23 01:54:47 AM

violentsalvation: Confabulat: ecmoRandomNumbers: violentsalvation: Are you really atheists or just agnostics who hate religion?

*shrugs shoulders*

Heh, that's funny. Why do religious people need to pin everyone who doesn't believe their fairy tales into specific groups?

Just because we didn't join your group, doesn't make us a member of another.

Are there branches of atheism I don't know about? I promise you I am not trying to pin anyone anywhere. I am just curious.

I don't know. I don't go to the meetings. I think if atheists need a support group, they might find more comfort in a religion, even if it is costly, like Mormonism. I gave them 10% of my income for years.

Confabulat

2011-12-23 01:55:40 AM

violentsalvation: Are there branches of atheism I don't know about?

What part of "Not joining a group makes you part of a group" can't you get?

violentsalvation

2011-12-23 01:57:56 AM

ecmoRandomNumbers: I don't think so. I think you can say, "I don't believe," and just leave it there

Well that makes sense.

ecmoRandomNumbers: Religion is an assertion of something existing and being true. Not believing in god because there is no evidence doesn't exactly connote, "and nothing you can say will change my mind, NYAAAH!" That's a projection that a lot of religious people make.

But doesn't atheism entirely deny the possibility? Or is it more "from the facts we have and can prove, there is no creator" ? And from the latter, wouldn't that be agnosticism?

CanisNoir

2011-12-23 01:59:07 AM

Confabulat: It's called "descriptive language."

Uh, no, it's called intentionally derogatory language hence the original question of whether you're just pissed off at Religion. Someone who just simply did not believe in God would be able to discuss the topic without feeling the need to use inflammatory language.

You worship an old book full of tall tales about magic. What else can it be referred as.

Really? You think Christians worship the Bible? I think I see your problem here.

Threadslayer

2011-12-23 02:03:40 AM

With Cthulhu.

MaliFinn

2011-12-23 02:04:14 AM

Christmas is bullshiat anyway, it's just a heavy layer of makeup on top of the winter solstice. The church made up the holiday to make it easier to recruit pagans.

Genevieve Marie

2011-12-23 02:07:28 AM

CanisNoir: Uh, no, it's called intentionally derogatory language hence the original question of whether you're just pissed off at Religion. Someone who just simply did not believe in God would be able to discuss the topic without feeling the need to use inflammatory language.

I'm pissed off at religion. I'm irritated by all the ways it shapes policy on several issues, and I really dislike the way its seeped into how certain things are treated in our culture.

It actually IS hard for me to discuss that in a civil manner sometimes, because of all the privilege afforded to religion in this country and all the ways that it affects things I care about.

I consider myself more of an agnostic than an atheist at this point, and I'm interested in a lot of religious philosophy and different approaches to spirituality but I don't believe in any concept of God that resembles what's generally talked about in mainstream religions. That doesn't mean that it's true for EVERY person who identifies as an atheist though.

ecmoRandomNumbers

2011-12-23 02:07:32 AM

violentsalvation: ecmoRandomNumbers: I don't think so. I think you can say, "I don't believe," and just leave it there

Well that makes sense.

ecmoRandomNumbers: Religion is an assertion of something existing and being true. Not believing in god because there is no evidence doesn't exactly connote, "and nothing you can say will change my mind, NYAAAH!" That's a projection that a lot of religious people make.

But doesn't atheism entirely deny the possibility? Or is it more "from the facts we have and can prove, there is no creator" ? And from the latter, wouldn't that be agnosticism?

I don't know. I just don't believe unless I see God, HIM or HER or ITself. I can't imagine any deity claiming responsibility for our species, anyway.

violentsalvation

2011-12-23 02:08:47 AM

Confabulat: violentsalvation: Are there branches of atheism I don't know about?

What part of "Not joining a group makes you part of a group" can't you get?

That comment helps. I guess you are all lumped together by terminology. I was trying to understand the differences, not to offend.

UsikFark

2011-12-23 02:09:37 AM

Booze, so much booze.

abb3w

2011-12-23 02:11:22 AM

violentsalvation: But sometimes I wonder if most atheists are not just agnostics who hate religion. Atheism and denying the possibility of something without disproving it seems as closed minded as the faith I was born into.

Ob:
a.imageshack.us

CarriePrejean

2011-12-23 02:12:09 AM

violentsalvation: But doesn't atheism entirely deny the possibility? Or is it more "from the facts we have and can prove, there is no creator" ? And from the latter, wouldn't that be agnosticism

No. There are two axes, if you will. One is the axis that runs from theism to atheism, describing belief or non-belief in a god. The other is the axis that runs from gnosticism to agnosticism, describing your level of certainty about the former.

/too lazy to find a diagram for you

Tim Tebow

2011-12-23 02:12:14 AM

Hobodeluxe: Just like everyone else. We exchange presents. Eat too much and fight off a nap while trying to watch football.

Just like everyone else? Any family reading of the Christmas story from one of the New Testament Gospels?

Di Atribe

2011-12-23 02:12:46 AM

Of course this blows up into Christians & Atheists trying to paint a clearer picture for each other rather than the OT, which is about how atheists celebrate Christmas.

Everyone celebrates Christmas because we like Christmas. Being around family, presents, too much food, football, and all of those wonderful things. Although, it seems to me that lately that Christmas for Christians has been about chastising people for not saying "Merry Christmas" enough for their tastes.

crotchgrabber

2011-12-23 02:12:58 AM

Ah Christmas.
Reading this thread shows me it continues to bring us together.

This non-believer will start that holiday with a blow job, then a cocktail, followed by football, booze, gifts, booze food and booze.

I have already started practicing.

DeArmondVI

2011-12-23 02:13:06 AM

Ummm.....this is America here. If people don't spend like mad from November to December on useless crap, then our economy falls apart.

Since I work in retail, and understand what it means to actually be on the front-lines of our consumer-based economy, I can say that if Christians actually embraced the non-materialism that Jesus espoused during Christmastime, then we'd be seriously farked as a consumption-based economy.

I figure that the most anti-Christ thing I can do as an atheist during Christmastime is to help convince Christians to keep buying the useless crap that makes our economy function.

/Hitch forbid they actually follow their god when my paycheck demands they don't

Lighting

2011-12-23 02:13:07 AM

Invite everybody we know over who does not have, or want to celebrate with, family.

Eat, drink, smoke, and laugh.

The kids get presents, the adults get good booze... couch and floor available till the 26th.

Bring food if you want, respect the vegetarians/vegans.

Confabulat

2011-12-23 02:13:30 AM

Britney Spear's Speculum

2011-12-23 02:13:42 AM

8am: We light the Atheistree on fire using the fat of kittens
9am: We call all the neighborhood children over to piss on the tree. Unfortunately for them, they get overcome with the smoke
9:15am: The children die.
10am: we piss on them to put them out
11am: My nadegegerb* peels the children's skin for dinner
12pm: We give praise to the devil
1pm: We have lunch at Jimmy Johns
2pm: We adopt orphans and rape and murder them
3pm: We take 37 weeks pregnant women and falcon punch them
3:30pm: We collect the products of the miscarriage, disrespectfully.
4pm: We donate the miscarried fetus from 3:30pm to the ACLU to give them strength in the New Year.
5pm: Dead children from the 9:15am are done.
6pm: There is no 6 pm.
7pm: We eat the dead children from 9:15.
8pm: We apply for biological science professor positions at the University.
9pm: hot toddy's
10pm: Hot Toddy's (yes, we capitalize the title of the 2nd Hot Toddy)
11pm: Bed time
11:59pm: Dream of a secular nation

*since only Christians can have families, we don't refer to the female who failed to abort us as "Mother"

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