1. Don't buy gift cards. They are a pain in the ass.
2. Do give cash.
3. Don't get pissed off if the person buys something you wouldn't with said cash. That's why it's a gift.

GAT_00: 1. Did I tell you I wanted something specific? Get that if it is within your price range.
2. Otherwise cash.

This.

Teknowaffle: For Christmas presents, it is best to go for the big three:

Booze
Porn
Cash.

Um, you're typing this out on the internet, the second thing on your list is pretty much free. Do some research and Merry Christmas, you're welcome.

Also, throw your VCR out, people are laughing at you behind your back when they come over and see it.

Vouchers for boob jobs - but we covered that yesterday

/We covered it in sticky, thick 'understanding'.

I got my wife an iPad.

Apple products FTW.

A Terrible Human: If they smell farking awful and you hate them would it be alright to just hand them body wash and body spray?

(thinks) Why. . . Yes. Yes, it would.

(scribbles) That's my gift list complete.

How about stop it with the childish and unreasonable displays? Share when you have excess. Spend time with each other. Do things for each other.

Nah, it will never work.

i'm going to give my wife some nice cock for christmas. i'll be nice this year and put a bow on it. festive.

some_beer_drinker: i'm going to give my wife some nice cock for christmas. i'll be nice this year and put a bow on it. festive.

Where do you store the guy until Christmas? The basement?

AnubisMan: some_beer_drinker: i'm going to give my wife some nice cock for christmas. i'll be nice this year and put a bow on it. festive.

Where do you store the guy until Christmas? The basement?

hahaha

Gift basket. Don't be a douche & buy a pre-packaged one though - find out the person's allergies/intolerances/other prohibitives and get something that avoids them. A big tip for gift baskets: ALWAYS put something under the raffia (shredded paper is for tossers!). No matter how cheap or naff the contents, you will always make the recipient smile when they realise there's MORE!


Also, cash. Money means they can buy themselves the gift they want. Don't be a douche though, put it in a card, FFS!

1: Wish List
2: Ask them

some_beer_drinker: i'm going to give my wife some nice cock for christmas. i'll be nice this year and put a bow on it. festive.

One...cut a hole in a box....

I'm good at finding bargains and deals and rebates and such, so my gift purchases often have a higher utility than cash if the present is something the person wanted anyway.

oh_please: some_beer_drinker: i'm going to give my wife some nice cock for christmas. i'll be nice this year and put a bow on it. festive.

One...cut a hole in a box....

Carry it around with you until Christmas Eve. She'll never figure it out.

AverageAmericanGuy: I got my wife an iPad.

Apple products FTW.

Ok, now you're just trolling!

Public Savant: AverageAmericanGuy: I got my wife an iPad.

Apple products FTW.

Ok, now you're just trolling!

Funnily enough, it's exactly what I got her.

I might also pick up that SD card reader/camera USB adapter thing they have for it.

Does anyone use Flickr on the iPad? What app do you recommend? The Flickr app seems to suck and isn't really designed for the iPad.

All I want for Christmas is booze and whores.

So the vacuum cleaner I got my wife was a bad idea? She said she wanted it.

/also got her an 80 minute Swedish massage, but she'll get the dirt sucker first
//first Christmas she hasn't gotten jewelry in a long time
///hope she bought me a pocket knife

Cash is the worst gift to get any one for Christmas, there is just no feeling behind it.

Ladies, we go over this every year. It's really not that complicated.

Listen to what they want all year round. If, by the end of the year, you have no idea what they might want, you don't know them well enough to be giving them gifts anyhow. Make life easy on yourself.

/That said, I usually buy a dozen 3.5oz Lindt bittersweet chocolate bars, slap a post-it on each one that says "Happy New Year," and keep them in my desk at work just in case someone drops by with something and I feel obliged to reciprocate.

MDGeist: Cash is the worst gift to get any one for Christmas, there is just no feeling behind it.

Cash can be traded for lots of things. The long list of "crap I thought you would like but is actually crap" that I've gotten over the years cannot be traded for anything but a spot in the trash can.

/I will note that giving someone cash and getting cash in return is super lame.

Buckets of pennies. Combines the usefulness of cash with the thoughtfulness of a gift basket.

I asked my wife to give me a list of 5 things she 'needs', and 5 things she 'wants' (I have a feeling these two often intertwine)

got a few things off each list, a couple surprises, then a share of Packers stock for each of the 5 members of our family. Yippee.

Kids are easy to shop for...no matter what you get they'll have fun with it and be bored with it in a month. ;-)

Ok, in case one of the five women on fark need it, heres tips on how to shop for a man. All you need to do is buy something that is dangerous and if its misused it can kill or maim him. Saws, drills, guns, knives, and crazy hookers are all good examples. Things used to maintain these items like gun oil, whetstones, and blow work too.

Also, that article was worthless...

Here's what I don't get with shoppers: When I was in retail, customers would constantly approach me asking for discounts on dented boxed merchandise. I don't get it. Does the box hold some significant value that must be adjusted for in the event of damage? Is the box important? Does it need to be in mint condition for you to tear into it and throw it out?

Typical responses would be:
I'm giving it as a gift. (You are going to give a whatever in a dented box as a gift?)
It could be damaged. (Our return policy would cover that, or did you want to waive your to a return for 5-10% off)
I save/collect the boxes (then you really don't want a dented box, do you?)

Seriously, asking for a discount on a dented box item is the worst reasoning I can think of. You can do better.

White.
People.
Problems.

GBB: Here's what I don't get with shoppers: When I was in retail, customers would constantly approach me asking for discounts on dented boxed merchandise. I don't get it. Does the box hold some significant value that must be adjusted for in the event of damage? Is the box important? Does it need to be in mint condition for you to tear into it and throw it out?

Typical responses would be:
I'm giving it as a gift. (You are going to give a whatever in a dented box as a gift?)
It could be damaged. (Our return policy would cover that, or did you want to waive your to a return for 5-10% off)
I save/collect the boxes (then you really don't want a dented box, do you?)

Seriously, asking for a discount on a dented box item is the worst reasoning I can think of. You can do better.

I hear ya...the box is meant to absorb the dings, drops, bumps, etc. It's not some integral part of the equipment.

I just want people to stop buying me junk I don't want or need, just because they don't know what I want. I try to gently direct people to things I could use... consumables like lotions and fragrant body washes (which I like), or just donate to charity. But it's hard, because you're not supposed to ASSUME someone is gonna get you anything, so you're not supposed to ask them to get you anything, unless they ask what you want first.

My mom is the worst about this. I can't tell you how much junk I have around here I don't want or need because of her, and clothes I don't like and aren't my style. A couple years ago I finally convinced her to stop buying me things, and instead take that money and put it in a savings account for a trip somewhere (I actually asked she donate it to the ASPCA, but she didn't like that idea).

My husband isn't much better. I mean, it's the thought that counts, but really, I don't need an electric bank. Just more clutter. This year I made an amazon wish list and stressed that I don't want any useless stuff to clutter up the place more.

Yeah, it "ruins" the surprise, but I'd rather know what I'm getting than end up with yet more stuff in this already small apartment.

It'd probably be easier if I didn't feel bad about throwing out or donating gifts.

"GoodyearPimp
Cash can be traded for lots of things... "


There's just no emotion behind it. It's like being paid off to go away. A gift, no matter how crap still makes one think there was some thought there, not just an opening of the wallet and a "shoo away now".

GoodyearPimp: MDGeist: Cash is the worst gift to get any one for Christmas, there is just no feeling behind it.

Cash can be traded for lots of things. The long list of "crap I thought you would like but is actually crap" that I've gotten over the years cannot be traded for anything but a spot in the trash can.

Gift giving is supposed to be about fulfilling wishes and wants, not needs. Cash is, frankly, too practical. It's like getting an ironing board for your wife. Give people cash and they'll more than likely use it to buy lunch at the cafeteria or laundry detergent or something equally practical and dull.


/I will note that giving someone cash and getting cash in return is super lame.

Therein lies the biggest problem. If everyone does it, gift giving is pointless and more than a tad embarrassing. Buy something for someone that they wouldn't buy for themselves. At our office Xmas swap, there was a nerf gun, a wind up robot, a USB hub shaped like a dog, a tribble, and even a Three Wolf Moon Shirt (pop). Good times and way more memorable than cash or an Applebees gift card or something equally boring.

MDGeist: Cash is the worst gift to get any one for Christmas, there is just no feeling behind it.

Cash is a terrible gift for people who are comfortable. It's a fantastic gift for those who are just scrapping by, and can't afford to buy more than a couple things they want. $100 to the struggling can keep the lights on for 2 months, and ease some of the worry way more than a fancy new blender.