Holy shiat, this may be the dumbest lawyer ever.

Or maybe this is a sign that the evidence against Sandusky is overwhelming, and the lawyer is just hoping he can confuse a stupid jury. You know, what OJ Simpson's lawyers did.

You know what it feels like to get kicked in the head by a steel toed boot? Course not. Nobody does. Silly question.

Do you like gladiator movies? You ever see a grown man naked?

I'm convinced that Jerry's legal defense is being guided by the Zucker brothers

I give it a week before Ashton finally cracks and admits that the whole thing is an elaborate Punk'd episode. There's just no other explanation that doesn't make me want to leave this planet forever.

Found this in the comments to TFA:

Nice try...I work in a residential facility for young people. Many of the kids have issues with hygiene due to inadequate training, moving into puberty, the effects of sexual abuse, poor motivation, etc. NEVER have we had a staff member shower with the kids to "teach" them the proper way to care for themself.

I remember getting some pointers on hygiene in health classes I had in school at around that age, but the training was definitely not "hands on."

It's long past time to suck on a shotgun barrel, Sandusky.

This is the proper way to clean your butthole boys......

It puts the soap on its penis or it gets the hose again?

Sounds like that lawyer might need to be a defendant.

I still love every legal talking head's reaction to Sandusky's interview w/Matt Lauer. To a man, they were all like, "WTF? What the hell kind of lawyer is he to let his client go on that interview and say those things?" This guy's a complete trip.

brigid_fitch: I still love every legal talking head's reaction to Sandusky's interview w/Matt Lauer. To a man, they were all like, "WTF? What the hell kind of lawyer is he to let his client go on that interview and say those things?" This guy's a complete trip.

Let? Hell, he volunteered to have Costas talk to him on-air.

"Well, the evidence against you is mounting at an exponential pace. I think our only chance to save this might be to ensure that there isn't a soul in the entire United States that doesn't have you prejudiced as a pedophile. No jury, no trial! Whaddya say, Jerry?"

Everyone is talking as if this is his original lawyer Joe that we've all been seeing on TV, but, it isn't...

Jerry Sandusky's new lawyer offered up an interesting possible explanation for the former Penn State defensive coordinator's habits of showering with young boys. "Some of these kids don't have basic hygiene skills," attorney Karl Rominger, who recently joined Sandusky's defense team....

So, considering we have Sandusky's first lawyer having the strong character of at 49 getting his 16 year old secretary pregnant, what do we think this lawyers deal is?

BKITU: "Well, the evidence against you is mounting at an exponential pace. I think our only chance to save this might be to ensure that there isn't a soul in the entire United States that doesn't have you prejudiced as a pedophile. No jury, no trial! Whaddya say, Jerry?"

Actually, you still get a trial... and actually there have been some articles that have stated that the defense team might actually REQUEST a bench trial, because a judge would be able to make more nuanced delineations of legality, what should be considered evidence, etc, vs. just having a jury hear all of the graphic testimony and obviously render a verdict putting him away for 400 years.

The thing I don't get about that possibly strategy is, Sandusky is like 72 or something, so, even if a judge is somehow "lenient", is that going to be any less than 20-30 years. Still basically life.

jake_lex: Holy shiat, this may be the dumbest lawyer ever.

He did tell people that if they believed Mike McQueary's story, they should call 1-800-REALITY (new window). Which is a number for people looking for gay phone sex...

So yes, dumbest lawyer ever

It's like he slept through the entire Michael Jackson trial. Or never watched Seinfeld.

What? I was teaching it how to moisturize! Many plus size women don't know how to properly apply lotion onto their skin.

Nice culture of poverty bullsh*t argument there, lawyerman.

coco ebert: Nice culture of poverty bullsh*t argument there, lawyerman.

Definitely a Gingrich supporter.

Ok, I'm now convinced this whole chirade is just The Onion trolling the Internet in the most epic way.

I mean, this can't be real.

bulldg4life: I reiterate my statement from the other day...

This guy has got to be the dumbest motherf*cking lawyer in the history of ever.


Nah, he's aiming for a mistrial.

Jerry Sandusky's new lawyer offered up an interesting possible explanation for the former Penn State defensive coordinator's habits of showering with young boys. "Some of these kids don't have basic hygiene skills," attorney Karl Rominger, who recently joined Sandusky's defense team....

Ted Koppel: Just answer me this, Tweek: What do you see as "positive" about toddler murder?
Tweek: U-uh... It's easy?
Ted Koppel: Yes... it is easy...

I was going to post a witty comment, but I've got to go teach Mrs. Eddie Adams from Torrance how to shower properly.

Was just teaching her kids to swim

FloydA: bulldg4life: I reiterate my statement from the other day...

This guy has got to be the dumbest motherf*cking lawyer in the history of ever.


Nah, he's aiming for a mistrial.

Why? A mistrial would just mean he'd be tried again. And if it were his lawyer's fault, he'd be taken off the case and probably held in contempt.

Just helping a woman with dry skin.

vernonFL: [www.wearysloth.com image 320x240]

What? I was teaching it how to moisturize! Many plus size women don't know how to properly apply lotion onto their skin.

Dammit, beat me to it.

downstairs: FloydA: bulldg4life: I reiterate my statement from the other day...

This guy has got to be the dumbest motherf*cking lawyer in the history of ever.


Nah, he's aiming for a mistrial.

Why? A mistrial would just mean he'd be tried again. And if it were his lawyer's fault, he'd be taken off the case and probably held in contempt.

Again folks... this is NOT Joe Amendola... this is a NEW lawyer on the "team".

Sounds like Sandusky needs ANOTHER new lawyer... wonder if this guy is available?

JonBenet didn't know how to play Hide and Go Seek properly.

I believe it.

That was the practical part of the training, the theoretical was done with various videos.

Jerry will get to star in the instructional video, "Dropping The Soap XIV", and deservedly so.

downstairs:
Why? A mistrial would just mean he'd be tried again. And if it were his lawyer's fault, he'd be taken off the case and probably held in contempt.

The guy's 70 something; he's probably got only a few more years where he's actually alive and competent to stand trial. Stretch this trial out for a year or so and then end in mistrial, and it's going to take another year before they can re-start a new trial. Throw that one as well, and you've eaten up around six years already. By the time the third trial starts Sandusky is in his 80s and has spent what's left of his life a free man- on trial, sure, but not in prison. That's assuming that Alzheimer's symptoms don't start showing up before then. If they do, he's found incompetent to stand trial, and its all over.

Even if that doesn't work, by the time of the second trial, a couple of years have passed, and we're on to some new outrage- this story slips off the front page and gets forgotten, witnesses relocate or die, prosecution gets harder.

In short, expect Sandusky's legal team to use any delaying tactic that they can. The more time goes by, the harder it is to prosecute.

/two cents- not a lawyer

dletter: So, considering we have Sandusky's first lawyer having the strong character of at 49 getting his 16 year old secretary pregnant, what do we think this lawyers deal is?

Karl Rominger is a well-respected lawyer based in the town I live in (Carlisle, PA). As far as I know he has no skeletons in his closet, and I've lived around here for virtually my entire life. There are no secrets in a small town.

That said, you almost have to wonder what these attorneys are thinking. It's as if they want their client to be convicted and are helping the process along. I can't believe he said that.

jake_lex: Holy shiat, this may be the dumbest lawyer ever.

Or maybe this is a sign that the evidence against Sandusky is overwhelming, and the lawyer is just hoping he can confuse a stupid jury. You know, what OJ Simpson's lawyers did.

Cochrane was a genius compared to this lawyer. Also, there is no way Sandusky doesn't die in jail.

Therion: It's long past time to suck on a shotgun barrel, Sandusky.

Dennis Miller (I paraphrase) said that if a pedophile eats a bullet before acting on his urges, he gets the VIP treatment in heaven.

So if any perverts out there feel like raping a child, do something very honorable and heroic and kill yourself now - don't delay. I'll buy you a beer in the afterlife if there is such a thing.

Somebody hire the It's Time to Stop Posting cat to visit that legal team.