I thought that said "gayest".

My parents are retired on Anna Maria Island and all they do is get drink. Their daily routine seems to be go to beach/ride bikes/play tennis and then it's off to happy from 4 to 7, eat at 8, go to bed at 9.

Not an awful lifestyle. If I was retired I'd probably drink and smoke weed all day.

Yeah..I'll be taking the bus next time I'm in Florida...

I have worked all over Florida and many of the retirement communities are party central. One place in particular is The Villages in Lady Lake. Really kind of creepy in a Stepford Wives sort of way. One must be over 55 to buy in and it's a completely planned town with vivacious seniors participating in archery, cycling, softball and such. When the sun goes down Main St is filled with seniors that drove up in their custom golf carts getting their drink on. I was told by a local that their alcohol consumption rivals college towns.

Good. So now I know where to go pick up some old skanks

Huh. Not a Wisconsin town on the list. I gotta try harder....

Also, these communities are purported to have high rates of STD's, but I'm too lazy to look up the stats.

HailRobonia: I thought that said "gayest".

gopher321: So...if your in a farmer's market...in Florida...Boca Raton, maybe...I wonder what your life expectancy would be?

I don't have an "in a farmer's market". At least last I checked.

Melbourne-Palm Bay represent. Can't really blame most of 'em for drinking around here...

NsRatched: I have worked all over Florida and many of the retirement communities are party central. One place in particular is The Villages in Lady Lake. Really kind of creepy in a Stepford Wives sort of way. One must be over 55 to buy in and it's a completely planned town with vivacious seniors participating in archery, cycling, softball and such. When the sun goes down Main St is filled with seniors that drove up in their custom golf carts getting their drink on. I was told by a local that their alcohol consumption rivals college towns.

The Villages is a Stephen King planned community, right?

(BTW, Stephen King winters in Sarasota County.)

OldManDownDRoad: A friend of mine whose parents retired to Florida has had to drive down to bail them out of jail - twice.

Yes, alcohol was involved.

LMFAO, I bet those were some of the most awesomest phone calls ever!

If I ever live long enough to retire your bet your sweet ass I'll be hammered as often as possible.

ds_4815: Melbourne-Palm Bay represent. Can't really blame most of 'em for drinking around here...

"Mom! The bouncers from Bare Assets are on the phone about Dad, again."

NsRatched: I have worked all over Florida and many of the retirement communities are party central. One place in particular is The Villages in Lady Lake. Really kind of creepy in a Stepford Wives sort of way. One must be over 55 to buy in and it's a completely planned town with vivacious seniors participating in archery, cycling, softball and such. When the sun goes down Main St is filled with seniors that drove up in their custom golf carts getting their drink on. I was told by a local that their alcohol consumption rivals college towns.

Sounds like "Leisure World" in California.

Well they're old. They got nothing else to do.

Define "heavy drinking".

I suspect that those stats are low. Plenty of my friends are what I would call heavy drinkers, yet they would not consider themselves to be heavy drinkers.

Wanna know the best part, subby? They're probably swingers, too!

/as in "to swing "

rengav: Define "heavy drinking".

I suspect that those stats are low. Plenty of my friends are what I would call heavy drinkers, yet they would not consider themselves to be heavy drinkers.

My doctor calls 2 or 3 beers a day "heavy drinking". Whatever, doc.

NsRatched: I have worked all over Florida and many of the retirement communities are party central. One place in particular is The Villages in Lady Lake. Really kind of creepy in a Stepford Wives sort of way. One must be over 55 to buy in and it's a completely planned town with vivacious seniors participating in archery, cycling, softball and such. When the sun goes down Main St is filled with seniors that drove up in their custom golf carts getting their drink on. I was told by a local that their alcohol consumption rivals college towns.

My parents live there. I'm actually driving down there later today.
If you are willing to change locations, you can find a 2 for 1 happy hour consistently from about 10:00AM to midnight.

And, they are expanding.. there are 3 full 'main squares' and something like 36 golf courses. 60,000 people over the age of 55.

Disturbingly, I think they also have the highest rate of STDs in Florida.

\the town
\\not my parents

I cry major foul here. Living in the Florida Keys, I have to say we are the booziest place there is. I know this because I'm already drunk and so are all my friends, my cat and the iguanas outside.

FLMountainMan: Great journalism - reporting on an article from US News, which "declines to mention the source of their rankings".

How Tallahassee, with 70,000 college students and drunken legislators and lobbyists, isn't at the top of the list is beyond me.



Tallahassee represent!

/so it's not normal to make a Bloody Mary before going into work? who knew?!

OldManDownDRoad: abhorrent1: rengav: Define "heavy drinking".

I suspect that those stats are low. Plenty of my friends are what I would call heavy drinkers, yet they would not consider themselves to be heavy drinkers.

My doctor calls 2 or 3 beers a day "heavy drinking". Whatever, doc.

Seriously? I'd call that "lunch."

Is your doctor Doogie Howser?

THIS. I've taken docs out to dinner for work and they put some liquor back. So can I.

/my doc is mad that I drink "too much" everyday
//Same average women drink in France, but no one cares there.

OldManDownDRoad: abhorrent1: rengav: Define "heavy drinking".

I suspect that those stats are low. Plenty of my friends are what I would call heavy drinkers, yet they would not consider themselves to be heavy drinkers.

My doctor calls 2 or 3 beers a day "heavy drinking". Whatever, doc.

Seriously? I'd call that "lunch."

Is your doctor Doogie Howser?

I agree. That's what she said though

abhorrent1

2011-12-14 11:49:09 AM

OldManDownDRoad: abhorrent1: rengav: Define "heavy drinking".

I suspect that those stats are low. Plenty of my friends are what I would call heavy drinkers, yet they would not consider themselves to be heavy drinkers.

My doctor calls 2 or 3 beers a day "heavy drinking". Whatever, doc.

Seriously? I'd call that "lunch."

Is your doctor Doogie Howser?

I agree. That's what she said though

Your doctor is obviously drunk, or not drunk enough.

/"that's what she said..." joke there somewhere.

Nick and Nora Charles, the slightly later years

You're not a drunk if you drink a lot and live in Tallahassee or Fort Lauderdale or the Keys. You're a partier. However, if you live in Palm Bay or Naples and drink too much out of boredom, you are a drunk. There's a difference.

/just a lil bit

Palm Bay'er here. I only drink 2 cans of beer a month. Granted, they're kegs....just sayin

Deerfield Beach must be up to their eyeballs in schnapps, or slivovitz, or some other horrible liqueur that old Jews drink for some reason.

I wouldn't drink with those two. They look like the kind of people who'd slip me a mickey.

Headline:BODY FOUND IN EVERGLADES

(AP) The dismembered body of a man believed to be in his late 50's was found today...

As a former resident of the Palm Bay/Melbourne area, I absolutely do not doubt these findings.

I'd also drink heavily if I had to live in Florida.

Jacksonville Beach not on the list? That's all we do here...BarCycle/Booze Cruise

OldManDownDRoad: FLMountainMan: Great journalism - reporting on an article from US News, which "declines to mention the source of their rankings".

How Tallahassee, with 70,000 college students and drunken legislators and lobbyists, isn't at the top of the list is beyond me.

Because those are amateurs when compared to retired Detroit factory workers and former servicemen on federal pensions. They retired relatively early (my Ol' Man retired at 48 after 30 years in the Marines and he had a pretty fat monthly check) so they have their health, the time, and the money to get hammered as often as possible. Plus, they had 20 or 30 years of practice.

A bar full of retired jarheads and squids in Jacksonville was the rowdiest place I've ever seen.

/and a lot of them are armed, to boot

Pete's Bar FTW

A dumb drug for a dumb state.

Fort Lauderdale/Pompano Beach here, although here it seems to be mostly younger people and the homeless who are constantly sloshed.

What? No "Grays Gone Wild!" jokes yet?

/disappointed.