Ryan Braun is actually an alien taking drugs to remain in human form?

Two things...
a) How many athletes have come out and said the test was wrong or it was a false positive or something is wrong with the test or there is an explanation or whatever only to still end up being suspended because their "reason" wasn't as good as when they could only give interesting soundbites
2) What in the blue bloody hell did he take that isn't a PED or steroid that causes excess amounts of synthetic testosterone in a person's body?
d) Is there anyone taking bets on whether he does actually serve the suspension? Because, well, he'll be serving it.

It really doesn't matter if he is totally innocent. Get a positive and the public will think any innocence is a coverup if it's anybody important.

So his buddy says he didn't willingly take any PEDs. Well that clears it up.

Let me guess: fertility drugs again?

bulldg4life: Two things...
a) How many athletes have come out and said the test was wrong or it was a false positive or something is wrong with the test or there is an explanation or whatever only to still end up being suspended because their "reason" wasn't as good as when they could only give interesting soundbites
2) What in the blue bloody hell did he take that isn't a PED or steroid that causes excess amounts of synthetic testosterone in a person's body?
d) Is there anyone taking bets on whether he does actually serve the suspension? Because, well, he'll be serving it.

i see what you did there.

Jorge Arangure had some interesting tweets about the situation today, namely,

No one from Braun's camp has refuted that the tests showed extremely high(double highest ever recorded in an MLB test) levels of SYNTHETIC testosterone, while refuting other things.

and if they didn't do that, one could infer that they're going to somehow defend the claims while conceding he had synth at those high levels. Which seems laughably absurd/downright impossible.

I like/liked(?) Braun. It's a shame if this is all true. I hope it isn't. Hard to understand a scenario in which it isn't though.

So about that beer I owe you, Gordon!

Totally saw him pass out at 31 Flavors last night.

A very good source on the Ryan Braun side of the drug testing controversy assures me that Braun did not test positive for a performance-enhancing drug, as reported by ESPN's "Outside the Lines."...

that source firmly believes the postive test will be overturned. Pretty amazing stuff, huh?

Dude I heard Sandusky's lawyer AND wife said he didn't rape any kids. Pretty amazing stuff huh?

Maybe he tested positive for extenze like that one sprinter (in which case he should probably just pretend it was roids)

Jesus, a guy adds .100 points to his slugging percentage in a year and tests positive for double the amount of testosterone in the history of testing, and all of a sudden everyone gets all judgey.

4NSpy: So his buddy says he didn't willingly take any PEDs. Well that clears it up.

ISWYDT

still a 25 game suspension for a stimulant is still alot of games. guess we will wait and see in january what goes down.

SurfaceTension: Trapper439: SurfaceTension: If I was a clean pro athlete, I'd be giving blood on a regular basis to at least 3 different test labs for them to test and hold results in confidence. Then if I was ever accused, or a false positive came about, I would have the labs release the testing results and the samples of blood still kept in storage for further testing by whatever official means necessary.

I've said before that I think each entrant in the Tour de France should have to give blood samples, and sign a binding contract which says that if at any stage in the following 15 years better testing tech finds that they were doping they should have to walk down the Champs-Elysees on the day of the final stage before the peloton comes through.

/I'm not a monster; their flights to Paris would be paid for (free holiday, yay!), and the rotten fruit given to the assembling crowds would be soft enough not to cause any permanent injury when thrown

The one issue with that is that, iirc, blood outside the body only keeps a short amount of time, on the order of weeks, before it breaks down. This is why my cunning plan has the pro athlete giving blood on a monthly basis.

while blood does break down, he did say that he would give blood and have it tested. the test results would be held. so the results and not the blood would be in "storage". but i do agree that if im a great athlete (100m runner, home run hitter, tour de france biker, boxer, i think you get the point) and im always in the news or public eye i would give blood and be tested all the time to show im legit.

"A source" from the Braun camp insists Braun is innocent? Unpossible!

a source close to me has informed me that he has been ingesting quite a bit of aaron rodgers' sperm. that was the reason for his success and also the reason for the high levels of testosterone

SurfaceTension: Freakin Rican: while blood does break down, he did say that he would give blood and have it tested. the test results would be held. so the results and not the blood would be in "storage". but i do agree that if im a great athlete (100m runner, home run hitter, tour de france biker, boxer, i think you get the point) and im always in the news or public eye i would give blood and be tested all the time to show im legit.

Right, but there are new PEDs coming out all the time that aren't even tested for. So the testing has to be for contemporary PEDs. And broken down blood can't be tested for that, so the blood being tested has to be reasonably fresh.

ahhhh gotcha!!

this will probably always be an issue. considering as you mentioned, new PEDs, science, and just people willing to cheat. testing will always be playing catch up. maybe we should just let them all take whatever they want, let mlb players hit with aluminum bats, let the pitchers wear helmets and watch the olympics records be broken.

I'd really like to believe this story is true, so I will!

So let me get this straight. An ANNONYMOUS informant is willing to talk about how its totally untrue and how hes tested for something that no other human has tested for in MLB, but this ANNONYMOUS informant will not divulge anymore details because of ongoing legal fights?

how could they possibly tell who leaked anything(which is why hes leaking something?) if like 30 people likely know on all sides. it would be impossible to narrow down who leaked it.

So either this is total BS or its just BS.

Sounds like they are just trying to sweep this under the rug to save face to me.

InmanRoshi: Jesus, a guy adds .100 points to his slugging percentage in a year and tests positive for double the amount of testosterone in the history of testing, and all of a sudden everyone gets all judgey.

LOL.

Sources close to Ryan Braun reporting to a Brewers blog are going to say that Braun did not take PEDs despite Outside the Lines very particular details and their rather high journalistic integrity for ESPN.

/and sources close to Ryan Braun would be his agent

First I was all..



Then I was...




And if Braun is actually suspended because he took steroids, I am gonna be all




//All images provided by GISing "please god no," seriously. Weird.

Trapper439: You know who else married a Ms Braun?

Well done.

Come on, a superstar Jewish athlete in this day and age?
/has a weird near- jewfro

InmanRoshi: Jesus, a guy adds .100 points to his slugging percentage in a year and tests positive for double the amount of testosterone in the history of testing, and all of a sudden everyone gets all judgey.

Son of a gun, you're right

Link (new window)

Nothing suspicious about that at all! OTOH, he had a higher SLG as a rookie.

It's a fair assumption to believe that any baseball player having a career year is cheating. Guilty until innocent until they institute real punishments. 1st positive test, 2 year ban. 2nd positive, Pete Rose style lifetime ban, plus all stats stricken from the books. Test weekly, no exemptions, no medical waivers.

Serenity now!

Lost Thought 00: It's a fair assumption to believe that any baseball player having a career year is cheating. Guilty until innocent until they institute real punishments. 1st positive test, 2 year ban. 2nd positive, Pete Rose style lifetime ban, plus all stats stricken from the books. Test weekly, no exemptions, no medical waivers.

I would say that is a little much, but only a little. It should probably be three strikes in a one year -> two year -> super long/lifetime/whatever. Or something similar.

Trapper439: SurfaceTension: If I was a clean pro athlete, I'd be giving blood on a regular basis to at least 3 different test labs for them to test and hold results in confidence. Then if I was ever accused, or a false positive came about, I would have the labs release the testing results and the samples of blood still kept in storage for further testing by whatever official means necessary.

I've said before that I think each entrant in the Tour de France should have to give blood samples, and sign a binding contract which says that if at any stage in the following 15 years better testing tech finds that they were doping they should have to walk down the Champs-Elysees on the day of the final stage before the peloton comes through.

/I'm not a monster; their flights to Paris would be paid for (free holiday, yay!), and the rotten fruit given to the assembling crowds would be soft enough not to cause any permanent injury when thrown

They already do that. Cycling has strict Out of Competition testing as well as testing for the winners and targeted testing for exceptional performances. They aren't catching the dopers by sitting on their asses, if they weren't trying you would hear nothing about the cheaters. Athletics and swimming have the same stringent testing regime too (and basically to get any sponsorship money in minority sports you need to sign up to anti-doping controls e.g UKAD in Britain)

The current problem is self sufficient sports which choose to ignore drugs and introduce easily defeated controls and limit testing. Braun can consider himself unlucky since baseball hardly has any stringent testing but is probably the best American major sport. NFL, NHL and NBA are probably rife with dopers, same for European soccer, possibly golf and definitely tennis.

Quick aside. Tennis is so doped up it is unbelievable and there is virtually no meaningful testing. In 2009 there was a single round of EPO testing at one specific tournament with none outside of competition. They have testing throughout the year but it is very limited in scope and even when players fail a lot of them have given pathetic excuses and gotten off with no ban.

The Smails Kid: Totally saw him pass out at 31 Flavors last night.

Spaulding Smails is a weird name for a girl.

The 31 Flavors being referenced:

The Selig family still owns the Brewers and Braun is under contract until 2020

Ya, I can see the commissioner cleaning this up quietly and getting rid of that 50 game suspension

Well at least I'm glad Braun is respecting the process and not instructing his people to selectively leak favorable, one-sided information to the media before a thorough, unbiased investigation can be completed. That would be wrong.

Figures. Braun is in the news again while a Real Baseball Player like Craig Counsell gets overlooked. The heart he plays with is something to behold. Grit. Intangibles. Gritangibles.