As she bore down on the guarded gate to the tarmac, law enforcement officers leapt in front of the car, but witnesses said the woman blew past at roughly 30 mph - nearly running down a sheriff's deputy who tried to stand in the way.
``She knocked the baton right out of his hand,'' Conery said.

The author of this article really has tried to make this incident seem as action-packed as a Hollywood blockbuster movie, despite it being about as thrilling as a visit to a cardboard box factory in reality.

She has issues.

Conery said shocked onlookers began shouting, ``Shoot her!

Teeheehee.

That would have been my ass... how many opportunities would you have gotten to see the Secret Service disintegrate a vehicle?

She's Radioactive Woman!

/too busy to photoshop it, never too busy to fark

Just wait-- Later today, someone will submit this exact same story from another website with the caption "Radioactive Woman Attacks Air Force One. France Surrenders".


Berrik

</no clue>

Someone forgot to take their meds.

USA wants to give France plutonium. Woman from future decides to give it back....

The sad part is she was driving a Ford Escort.

Excellent.

Does she not realize who is next in line if Bush is gone???

She was clearly insane.

was her name Jennifer Walters?
/geek!

Does she use her powers for good, or for awesome?

Ha.

We're not going to be hearing from this chick for a loooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooong time.

Trust me.

Sometimes I eat the mushrooms that grow in the woods behind the house.

Diogenes wins a beer!

Well I'm not uptight, not unattractive
turn me on tonight, I'm radioactive. Radioactive.
Well its not a fight, and I'm not your captive
turn me loose to the night - I'm radioactive, radioactive

[/The Firm]

Officials were unclear whether the woman was threatening Bush, but at least one witness said police took the threat seriously - emerging with hazardous materials suits to search her car.



stupid pigz can't even fight a goddamn radioactive woman....makes me sooooo mad.....

Uh, jiminy jillickers?

then banged a U-turn

That somehow sounds painful. Where's the video?

Was she strong?
Listen bud, shes got radioactive blood.

Can someone please post a pic of her husband and son, Radioactive Man and Fallout Boy!!

So close, so close..
You think she might have killed Bush?
Ah, if only, if only.

"described as mid-30s, dark-haired, slightly built and Caucasian"
All this, and she likes to party?

How _you_ doin'?

At no time was the president in any danger Unless of coarse she actually was radioactive.

Skinink
You beat me to the repo man picture.
:)

Meanwhile, an except of Dick Cheney's interior monologue:

"Damn it, I was so close! Why is it in this day ineffective nuts jobs are the only ones who go after the President! Yes, one day someone will succeed and I will be crowned emperor and hold this country in the iron fist like it should be."


(PS - Mr. Ashcroft and Mr. Ridge? This is called satire and it's a protected form of speech. So stop chomping at the bit.)

As she bore down on the guarded gate to the tarmac, law enforcement officers leapt in front of the car, but witnesses said the woman blew past at roughly 30 mph - nearly running down a sheriff's deputy who tried to stand in the way.

``She knocked the baton right out of his hand,'' Conery said.


I'd have paid good money to see that.

"Up and atom!"
"Up and at them"
"Up and ATOM!"
"Up and AT THEM!"
"UP AND ATOM!"
"UP AND AT THEM!"
"Better!"

She probably had herpes or crabs thats why she said she was radioactive

Conery said shocked onlookers began shouting, ``Shoot her!"

Shocked onlookers, my ass. They knew that Bush was in no danger and the worst the woman could do was bump into an empty plane. If they wanted to see her killed they're just sick bastards.

Sure guys, make fun... That poor woman could be somebody's gamma.

/me runs

So what? She was trying to irradiate the president?

slapmesack,and her brother:
Particle man, particle man
Doing the things a particle can
What's he like? It's not important
Particle man

jubjub0527

That's just plain nasty. As much as I despised Clinton, I would never allow harm to come to him if I could stop it.

You don't like someone, fine. You think they're doing a bad job, fine. Say so.

Never, ever, threaten the life of the president, or imply that his death would be a good thing.

Chowderhead.

i heard she has a posse.

Sarah conner?

Jimminy jillikers radioactive woman!!!

acurus,

Is the posse on broadway

"described as mid-30s, dark-haired, slightly built and Caucasian "

slightly built? what were they doin, checkin out her rack?

"An apparently deranged woman who..."

WTF? 'apparently'??!?

He said "chowderhead", that was cool.

The president's life was saved by a Ford Explorer?
What kind of non-sensical world is this?!!?!?