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(TMZ) Obvious Terrell Owens' birthday bash is only slightly less depressing than Kirk Cameron's   (tmz.com) divider line 55
More: Obvious, Terrell Owens, Kirk Cameron, football stars, Guy Fawkes  
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7593 clicks; posted to Sports » on 07 Dec 2011 at 10:35 PM   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»   |    Get this fabulous T-Shirt and impress the methane out of your friends! shirt it!



55 Comments   (+0 »)
   

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The Onion is prophetic [TotalFark]
2011-12-07 09:53:43 PM
Where's the photo of TO sitting alone at a table?

/cue the Sad Keanu, Lonely Kirk, and Lonesome RON PAUL pics
 
fatalvenom
2011-12-07 10:36:37 PM
www.theepochtimes.com
 
urban.derelict
2011-12-07 10:52:49 PM
a7.sphotos.ak.fbcdn.net
 
HappyLittleTree
2011-12-07 10:53:04 PM
Wait, should I hate TO now because he's aware of his financial situation?
 
mikaloyd
2011-12-07 11:02:06 PM
Who?
 
t3knomanser
2011-12-07 11:07:16 PM
If you're over the age of 12 and still think you should have a big exciting birthday party, you aren't mentally over the age of 12. So, hey, TO has finally hit those awkward teenage years.
 
Representative of the unwashed masses
2011-12-07 11:09:46 PM
Maybe Jeff Garcia can send him some Texans swag?
 
SharkTrager
2011-12-07 11:30:10 PM
HappyLittleTree: Wait, should I hate TO now because he's aware of his financial situation?

There are plenty of reasons to hate TO.
 
HappyLittleTree
2011-12-07 11:32:48 PM
SharkTrager: HappyLittleTree: Wait, should I hate TO now because he's aware of his financial situation?

There are plenty of reasons to hate TO.

Exactly.
 
MAYORBOB
2011-12-07 11:37:21 PM
The Onion is prophetic: "Where's the photo of TO sitting alone at a table?"

Alas, no photos available of the tableaux but the scene involved TO trying to steal a slice of pizza from a kid at the next table at Chuck E. Cheese while Drew Rosenhaus kept yelling at the server, "next question" over and over again.
 
Flying Lasagna Monster
2011-12-07 11:48:01 PM
www.fiyastarter.com

Banging a Playmate, still in the NFL, laughing at T.O.
 
Arkanaut
2011-12-07 11:50:06 PM
GimpyNip: I was there. Took this pic.

I believe the only appropriate caption for that picture is "FOREVER ALONE".
 
forgotmydamnusername
2011-12-07 11:59:40 PM
I liked how he thinks he'll be playing football again. Still farking delusional as ever. Amazing how, with as much money as he made, he had nearly nothing the day he left the NFL. I can understand how you could find yourself living paycheck-to-paycheck when they pay you $15 an hour, but an NFL star's salary? Jeebus.
 
Stig O'Tracy
2011-12-08 12:00:54 AM
I have had about enough of these entitled douchebags who make a little money and believe they're going to be wealthy for the rest of their lives. Inevitably they subsequently live in perpetual bankruptcy while maintaining their lavish "lifestyle". Wretch.

/TO
//Braxton
//any and all gansta rappers
 
Ishkur [TotalFark]
2011-12-08 12:10:18 AM
I thought he had 50 million reasons to celebrate.
 
unicron702
2011-12-08 12:24:24 AM
I remember watching that TO show (forgive me) and he went into a jewelry store, bought $90,000 diamond earrings on a friggin whim, and then wore them out of the store. So seriously, this was a long time coming.
 
velvet_fog
2011-12-08 12:27:47 AM
Maybe T.O. should listen to Jerry Seinfeld's thoughts on failed suicides: Link (new window)
 
nonzero
2011-12-08 12:45:43 AM
t3knomanser: If you're over the age of 12 and still think you should have a big exciting birthday party, you aren't mentally over the age of 12. So, hey, TO has finally hit those awkward teenage years.

So, you know my ex-wife?
 
A stranger in the Alps
2011-12-08 01:10:01 AM
media.zenfs.com
 
davidphogan
2011-12-08 01:30:43 AM
GimpyNip: [i281.photobucket.com image 640x480]
I was there. Took this pic.

What was he really there for?
 
AverageAmericanGuy
2011-12-08 05:58:01 AM
Holy shiat! Are those Subway foot long subs?

That's a farking bash right there.
 
H31N0US
2011-12-08 06:20:42 AM
TO should have had Bobby Bonilla's agent.
 
DubyaHater
2011-12-08 07:01:56 AM
Flying Lasagna Monster: [www.fiyastarter.com image 287x357]

Banging a Playmate, still in the NFL, laughing at T.O.

Thank you for reminding me exactly how unattractive and unappealling I am.
 
LoneDoggie
2011-12-08 07:55:13 AM
Worst party I've heard about since Billy Batts's "Just got out of prison Gala"
 
Evilsmurf
2011-12-08 08:22:02 AM
AverageAmericanGuy: Holy shiat! Are those Subway foot long subs?

That's a farking bash right there.

3 footlongs, 1 6-inch. Which to my mind puts the attendance at:
Kirk
The person taking the photo.
The person on the left of the photo.
The person on the right who doesn't seem to be that thrilled to be there.
 
AverageAmericanGuy
2011-12-08 08:27:47 AM
Evilsmurf: AverageAmericanGuy: Holy shiat! Are those Subway foot long subs?

That's a farking bash right there.

3 footlongs, 1 6-inch. Which to my mind puts the attendance at:
Kirk
The person taking the photo.
The person on the left of the photo.
The person on the right who doesn't seem to be that thrilled to be there.

I think you forgot about God.

Link (new window)
 
Lt. Cheese Weasel
2011-12-08 08:28:23 AM
LoneDoggie: Worst party I've heard about since Billy Batts's "Just got out of prison Gala"

'Now go get your effin shinebox.'
 
Sgt Otter [TotalFark]
2011-12-08 08:28:35 AM
AverageAmericanGuy: Holy shiat! Are those Subway foot long subs?

That's a farking bash right there.

I liked when Kirk's reps claimed that they were going to feed the 50 people conveniently behind the camera with 3 foot-longs, a six-inch, and a tiny-ass cake.
 
AverageAmericanGuy
2011-12-08 08:31:47 AM
Sgt Otter: AverageAmericanGuy: Holy shiat! Are those Subway foot long subs?

That's a farking bash right there.

I liked when Kirk's reps claimed that they were going to feed the 50 people conveniently behind the camera with 3 foot-longs, a six-inch, and a tiny-ass cake.

Oh ye of little faith.

Link (new window)
 
JohnnyShotMe
2011-12-08 08:48:44 AM
Stig O'Tracy: I have had about enough of these entitled douchebags who make a little money and believe they're going to be wealthy for the rest of their lives. Inevitably they subsequently live in perpetual bankruptcy while maintaining their lavish "lifestyle". Wretch.

/TO
//Braxton
//any and all gansta rappers

Link (new window)
 
ihatedumbpeople
2011-12-08 09:13:26 AM
Flying Lasagna Monster: still in the NFL

Technically yes, but he JUST got signed to be 3rd string QB behind 'The Jake" himself, and was out of the league for some time prior to that.....so....
 
ihatedumbpeople
2011-12-08 09:16:10 AM
forgotmydamnusername: I liked how he thinks he'll be playing football again. Still farking delusional as ever. Amazing how, with as much money as he made, he had nearly nothing the day he left the NFL. I can understand how you could find yourself living paycheck-to-paycheck when they pay you $15 an hour, but an NFL star's salary? Jeebus.

Dude pays nearly $50k in child support a month....it adds up quick.
 
MadMonk
2011-12-08 09:40:58 AM
Atheletes that make millions a year....no work for a year? flat broke.

Should I really feel bad about this? Laugh? I honestly don't know....at least they are pumping their millions back into the economy as soon as they get paid.
 
ihatedumbpeople
2011-12-08 09:50:24 AM
Combine his child support with legal fees, regular living expenses, houses he's bought for his various baby mamas (4 of them last I checked) and I can see why the guy is almost broke.

Those dumb coonts are bleeding him dry, not realizign their meal ticket is going to dry up any time now. Instead of taking a 'reasonable' amount of money from him for th enext 18 years, they'll take as much as possible for 2-3, then get scraps for the rest.
 
HotWingConspiracy
2011-12-08 10:09:38 AM
t3knomanser: If you're over the age of 12 and still think you should have a big exciting birthday party, you aren't mentally over the age of 12. So, hey, TO has finally hit those awkward teenage years.

I was unceremoniously booted from a social circle for suggesting that a 32 year old man that planned a birthday scavenger hunt spanning 12 hours followed by an expensive dinner *and* sent a "preferred gift list" might be a narcissist. I don't miss them.

And to stay on topic:

As for his future in the NFL ... we're told T.O. is still confident he'll be back in the league by the end of the year.

The rest of us aren't so confident, buddy.
 
nervoust
2011-12-08 10:25:23 AM
As for his future in the NFL ... we're told T.O. is still confident he'll be back in the league by the end of the year.

And I'm confident that i'll be farking Katy Perry by the end of the year.
 
Crewmannumber6
2011-12-08 10:29:36 AM
Karma's a biatch
 
Fizpez
2011-12-08 10:33:49 AM
All he needs is one playoff buble team to have an injury at wide out and his phone will probably ring for at least a "so, whatcha been up to and how are the legs" call.
 
mrtoadswildride
2011-12-08 11:02:17 AM
Fizpez: All he needs is one playoff buble team to have an injury at wide out and his phone will probably ring for at least a "so, whatcha been up to and how are the legs" call.

If his name was Randy Moss...I'd agree.

But TOs 38, coming off an ACL surgery, and he's been nothing but problems from day onw everywhere he's been.

Moss is 34, not coming off a major surgery, and has shown that he can get his act together for a year or so if he's got motivation (e.g. a Superbowl run or a contract extension)...
 
sweetlenny
2011-12-08 11:18:27 AM
That's a pic of Virgil. The Million Dollar man's bodyguard.
 
IAmRight [TotalFark]
2011-12-08 11:34:04 AM
mrtoadswildride: But TOs 38, coming off an ACL surgery, and he's been nothing but problems from day onw everywhere he's been.

He was only a little problem in Dallas and he wasn't a problem in Buffalo or Cincinnati that anyone knew of.
 
JacobDavidWatson
2011-12-08 11:56:58 AM
GimpyNip: [i281.photobucket.com image 640x480]
I was there. Took this pic.

Is that Virgil? If so can you repost that pic without the Terrel Owens stuff on it. Running family meme about Virgil.....
 
Odd Bird
2011-12-08 12:22:29 PM
ihatedumbpeople: Flying Lasagna Monster: still in the NFL

Technically yes, but he JUST got signed to be 3rd string QB behind 'The Jake" himself, and was out of the league for some time prior to that.....so....

So he's not Rogers or Brady. He has a job (for now) in the pros and has been playing in one of the lesser leagues. The salary for a few games as a third-stringer will likely exceed the income levels of most 40-somethings in here (including myself).

IAmRight: mrtoadswildride: But TOs 38, coming off an ACL surgery, and he's been nothing but problems from day onw everywhere he's been.

He was only a little problem in Dallas and he wasn't a problem in Buffalo or Cincinnati that anyone knew of.

Andy and Donovan might have a few thigns to add.
 
SkittlesAreYum
2011-12-08 12:26:35 PM
But now that he's low on green ... Owens has decided to do the responsible thing ... and have a low-key birthday dinner with his GF and some close friends.

How is that depressing in any way?
 
KiwDaWabbit
2011-12-08 01:54:28 PM
ihatedumbpeople: Combine his child support with legal fees, regular living expenses, houses he's bought for his various baby mamas (4 of them last I checked) and I can see why the guy is almost broke.

Those dumb coonts are bleeding him dry, not realizign their meal ticket is going to dry up any time now. Instead of taking a 'reasonable' amount of money from him for th enext 18 years, they'll take as much as possible for 2-3, then get scraps for the rest.

Maybe their all finance experts and took the time value of money into consideration.
 
KiwDaWabbit
2011-12-08 01:55:04 PM
*they're

/Damn you, auto correct?
//Yeah, that.
 
degenerate-afro
2011-12-08 02:08:23 PM
davidphogan: GimpyNip: [i281.photobucket.com image 640x480]
I was there. Took this pic.

What was he really there for?

Looks like that picture was taken at Comic Con while they were setting up.
 
mrtoadswildride
2011-12-08 02:51:17 PM
IAmRight: mrtoadswildride: But TOs 38, coming off an ACL surgery, and he's been nothing but problems from day onw everywhere he's been.

He was only a little problem in Dallas and he wasn't a problem in Buffalo or Cincinnati that anyone knew of.

Fine...even if you ignore his attitude problems. He simply isn't the TO of 10 years ago; he's 38, and he's still coming off major knee surgery....I think he's done.
 
IAmRight [TotalFark]
2011-12-08 03:03:53 PM
mrtoadswildride: Fine...even if you ignore his attitude problems. He simply isn't the TO of 10 years ago; he's 38, and he's still coming off major knee surgery....I think he's done.

That's fine. Hey, I never liked the guy (he was always a person that I wouldn't draft for FFB just because I never wanted to put myself in a position to root for him). I just felt it only fair to point out that he did seem to mellow out a bit after the first "suicide attempt" in Dallas.

He actually produced adequately for the Bengals last year - hell, if you can get him for pro-rated vet minimum, why not sign him if you feel you're a WR short? I highly doubt he hasn't worked out.

/I can say if I were an AFL team I'd offer him a contract (though they'd only pay $400/game and there's no way he'd take it). Free publicity and if he does come, then that sells tickets and hey, maybe he becomes an ambassador for the sport.
 
jackandwater
2011-12-08 03:58:45 PM
Sgt Otter: AverageAmericanGuy: Holy shiat! Are those Subway foot long subs?

That's a farking bash right there.

I liked when Kirk's reps claimed that they were going to feed the 50 people conveniently behind the camera with 3 foot-longs, a six-inch, and a tiny-ass cake.

I guess you never heard the story about the loaves and fishes then?

Non-practicing catholic, heard the same stories at the same time of year every year, was just like network TV.
 
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