Thank god this did not have the ever so stupid 'wait, what' thing at the end of the headline. Unless some admin is going to rush in and add it on.

You usually only see this sort of behavior at school sporting events.

FTFA: "One bit the finger off the other and spat the blood out like an animal."

How does a human expel blood from their mouth and how, exactly, does it differ from how an animal does it?

If anything, I'd think an animal wouldn't spit out blood.

In the guy's defense, if the parent didn't want his fingers bitten off, he shouldn't have had fingers made out of meat.

RexTalionis: In the guy's defense, if the parent didn't want his fingers bitten off, he shouldn't have had fingers made out of meat.

;)

You think he cares that 2,000 years ago our Lord and Savior was born in a mangler?

Uh, I think you mean "manger."

No, no, honey, you're thinking of "manager."

That's the way ALL nativity plays should end.

I don't have to give my name and address to buy a newspaper; I won't provide personal information to read one online, either.

I wish Fark would flag stories that required registration to read.

Lone Stranger: Virgin birth ... yeah I'm supposed to believe that one.

I think Robot Chicken had the best take on this.

Mary: Hey, Joesph, remember how I told you I didn't want to have sex with you?
Joesph: Yeah?
Mary: Well, I don't know how, but I'm Pregnant!
Joesph's Friend: Hey, Joesph! How goes the plan to bang mary in her sle- Oh! Hi Mary.

A 39-year-old man was arrested on suspicion of assault and bailed by police.

The police bailed him out?

The 32-year-old victim was taken to hospital where he was treated for his injury before being discharged.

Coincidentally, Jesus didn't seriously start telling people to stop biting each others' fingers off until he was nearly 32.

Knara: I keep wanting to get some folks to dress up as praetorians Herod's Soldiers and visit random nativity plays to confiscate their baby Jesusii

Sheesh, doesn't anyone read the Bible no more?

I said Advent Candles, not Advent Cannibals!

Gilligann: A 39-year-old man was arrested on suspicion of assault and bailed by police.

The police bailed him out?

Have you a recommendation of a different course of action for arrested suspects who take on water?

Scaryduck: Subby here: For those that requested it - "Wait... WHAT?"

The rest of you - Take the rest of the day off

One month of totalfark for you.

Knara: All people know of the nativity was that "Romans" were looking for kids.

Sure, Herod wasn't Roman, but he was a Roman puppet.

The costumes would drive the point home.

/sometimes you need to play to your audience, as opposed to being meticulously devoted to the source material


In the spirit of making the costumes play to the audience, I propose a helmet with a crest, a sword, and a "Team Herod" t-shirt.

/metal kilt optional

cowgirl toffee: That's the way ALL nativity plays should end.

But they should always start with meerkats (new window).

/Get em while they're hot.

daffy: I came for the Jesus bashing. Sadly, I found it.

What do you mean "sadly"? Do you mean to say that you were in a state of grief at the time you found this alleged "Jesus bashing" you speak of? Or do you mean that it is a sad comment on something or other that you found it at all?
Clarify, man, clarify.

The First Four Black Sabbath Albums: Yet another way in which atheists are assholes.

I know, right! I mean this guy, in the article, goes to the play - and get this!- he even sends his kid into it- and the guy is all "I'm going to eat flesh and drink blood! Mwa-ha-ha-ha!!!"

I mean, seriously, what kind of an asshole would send his own son to do something that the kid obviously didn't want to do, and then force the son to engage in some sort of weird cannibalism? It's completely f**ed up. There has got to be something seriously wrong with a guy who would force his own son to suffer like that, and even worse, to engage in the bizarre ritual of eating human flesh! That's just crazy.