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(11 Alive) Dumbass The mall is not an appropriate place to find mistletoe... with your shotgun   (decatur.11alive.com) divider line 26
More: Dumbass, Christmas Is..., shotguns, Buckhead, Big John  
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3521 clicks; posted to Main » on 07 Dec 2011 at 12:21 AM   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»   |    Get this fabulous T-Shirt and impress the methane out of your friends! shirt it!



26 Comments   (+0 »)
   
 
2011-12-06 10:39:55 PM
Jingle bells.
Shot gun shells.

Angles we have heard on high.
Tell us to go out and buy.
 
2011-12-07 12:04:19 AM
farm8.staticflickr.com

"These were taken at a mall in Decatur...today."
 
2011-12-07 12:41:11 AM
It's only magical if a Druid gathers it with a tiny gold pruning scythe or sickle called a serpe in French (from serpens, a serpent, in Latin). Shooting it is not kosher unless you are Robin Hood and flirting with Maid Marian.

I learned that from Asterix comics.

The mistletoe is a parasitic plant that grows preferentially on oak trees, sacred to the Druids. It is poisonous, which is why you see a lot of plastic mistletoe rather than the real thing.

It stays green in winter.
 
2011-12-07 12:48:20 AM
Yes Mr. William Robinson there is gun ordinance

/Shoot the mall with wads of folly...............
 
2011-12-07 12:51:13 AM
I've actually thought of doing the same thing in my yard but since I live a few miles from this incident I think I'll refrain.

Side note: do you think a .410 would knock a mistletoe out of the upper branches of an oak tree? Because these are the current logistics of my cunning plan.
 
2011-12-07 12:56:33 AM
Ha! I remember my uncle shooting mistletoe out of a tree with a shotgun, but of course, this was in rural AL. where the nearest neighbors were a mile away... not at a friggin' shopping mall.

Dumbass.
 
2011-12-07 12:57:28 AM
But I thought every gun owner handled a gun responsibly and that's why there would be no crime??
 
2011-12-07 01:01:11 AM
tsk.. this is why I do MY shopping at SOUTH DeKalb Mall
 
2011-12-07 01:03:15 AM
theinfosphere.org

Yada yada, mistletoe / tow-missile.
 
2011-12-07 01:10:58 AM
Begoggle Add Favorite User Quote 2011-12-07 12:57:28 AM Ignore User
But I thought every gun owner handled a gun responsibly and that's why there would be no crime??


And now he is just another stupid non gun owner.
 
2011-12-07 01:19:57 AM
t0.gstatic.com


/Don't shot the mistletoe
//hot like Decatur
 
2011-12-07 01:30:32 AM
brantgoose: It's only magical if a Druid gathers it with a tiny gold pruning scythe or sickle called a serpe in French (from serpens, a serpent, in Latin).


I came here for the Asterix reference, and I leave satisfied.
 
2011-12-07 01:36:05 AM
Shotgun? Pfft.

Everyone knows you should use a .444 Marlin.
 
2011-12-07 01:50:49 AM
Rapmaster2000: I've actually thought of doing the same thing in my yard but since I live a few miles from this incident I think I'll refrain.

Side note: do you think a .410 would knock a mistletoe out of the upper branches of an oak tree? Because these are the current logistics of my cunning plan.


I used to bring it down with a Crossman pump action BB gun. Not only is a shotgun cheating, but seems to me you'd end up with salad, not sprigs.
 
2011-12-07 01:51:19 AM
I had to read that article three times to figure out who was shooting the mistletoe where.

Goddamn rednecks.
 
2011-12-07 01:57:44 AM
I had a friend who used to climb trees, gather mistletoe, and then sell it door to door at $3 for a small bag full.

Made some pretty good money.
 
2011-12-07 01:58:57 AM
It sounds like something Larry, Darryl and Darryl would do. Well, OK, Darryl. Larry wouldn't approve.
 
2011-12-07 03:50:36 AM
vossiewulf: I used to bring it down with a Crossman pump action BB gun. Not only is a shotgun cheating, but seems to me you'd end up with salad, not sprigs.

Yeah, it may be cheating, but at least you don't shoot your eye out!
 
2011-12-07 06:11:31 AM
mistletoe = kiss. why stop there? great mysteries of life, how you mock me.
 
2011-12-07 06:25:25 AM
As a person that lives in the south I am ashamed to admit that I have actually done this...

Shoot mistletoe out of a tree I mean... Not get arrested near a mall for shooting a gun.
 
2011-12-07 06:37:42 AM
So basically I take some carts that aren't looking too well, push them into this ravine, then fix them up real nice and sell them back to the mall.
 
2011-12-07 06:41:25 AM
I'd break out my mistletoe belt buckle, but after this.....
 
2011-12-07 08:52:54 AM
vossiewulf: Rapmaster2000: I've actually thought of doing the same thing in my yard but since I live a few miles from this incident I think I'll refrain.

Side note: do you think a .410 would knock a mistletoe out of the upper branches of an oak tree? Because these are the current logistics of my cunning plan.

I used to bring it down with a Crossman pump action BB gun. Not only is a shotgun cheating, but seems to me you'd end up with salad, not sprigs.


Yeah, that's called "doin' it wrong". I remember when I was a kid I saw my dad shoot mistletoe out of the top of a tree near our house with a .22. It's pretty easy for someone who shoots squirrels.
 
2011-12-07 09:02:31 AM
Why is there anything weird about shooting mistletoe out of a tree? It seems like the easiest way.
 
2011-12-07 09:53:03 AM
doubled99: Why is there anything weird about shooting mistletoe out of a tree? It seems like the easiest way.

Nothing weird about it at all, except that he was doing it in a Mall parking lot, not the woods
 
2011-12-07 10:25:14 AM
"One would think there would be some better tools out there" than a shotgun, said Parish."

Spoken like a true spokeswoman. You have to be somewhat clueless to get a job as a spokesanything. Shotgun is the traditional method, but the mall parking lot is not the traditional place.
 
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